Meet the Press Transcript -- If Jesus Were Nominated on the Dem Ticket

[GiovanniC]

"Welcome to Meet the Press. I'm Tim Russert. Joining me today is our round table of political analysts. Bob Novak, douchebag for liberty of the Chicago Tribune. And Peggy Nooner -- er, Noonan -- former speechwriter for Ronald Reagan.

Bob, the Super Tuesday primaries have pretty well secured the Democratic Presidential nomination for dark horse candidate Jesus Christ. What's the political buzz about this decision?"

NOVAK: "Well Tim, as you know, it is widely known -- and even documented, that this Jesus Christ character has hung out with prostitutes. Is that the sort of moral leadership we want in the leader of the free world?"

RUSSERT: "Good point. Peggy? Why do you think Jesus Christ has made these kinds of political gaffes?"

NOONAN: "I think in large part that it's because he has absolutely no experience in politics. You know, he just has this attitude that I think indicates that he doesn't know what he's doing and he isn't going to worry about it. He has said, 'Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.' But this country needs forward-looking and forward-thinking leaders, not these Democratic 'Que sera, sera' types."

NOVAK: "The truth is that Jesus Christ is on the record as saying all sorts of dumb things. For example, he thinks the way to handle the budget and the national debt is to 'forgive us our debts as we have forgiven our debtors.' I'm sorry, but that's just a fiscal and economic catastrophe waiting to happen. What is this guy thinking?"

RUSSERT: "Peggy?"

NOONAN: "Well I don't have to tell you that we live in very dangerous times Tim, and we need a leader who is strong on national defense. We have here a guy who was quoted as saying, 'If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also.' And I don't -- I don't see how the Democrats can possibly think that a guy like that should be Commander in Chief."

[Spinzonner]

1. Yeah, and Profit is spelled all wrong too

[SEpatriot]

2. And did I mention class warfare?

Jesus is quoted as saying that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to go to heaven. As Rush Limbaugh would say - see the same old class warfare playbook. It's clear that Jesus is anti-growth and for higher taxes and more regulation - he's just out of the mainstream.

"Jesus Christ's record - troubling"

[GiovanniC]

3. He Was Also Pro-Taxation

When he said to "render unto Caesar what is Casear's."

What a commie.

[coeur_de_lion]

4. He never got married -- probably gay

And what's with the long hair and sandals? He looks like a hippie.