Have you ever employed or would you employ a domestic servant?

[lapislzi]

I'm really curious about people's attitudes towards employing domestic help.

Rules of discussion:

--The term "domestic servant" would include: housekeepers/cleaners, cooks, laundry workers, drivers, child care workers (EXCEPT as-needed babysitters). Feel free to add any category I may have left out.
--Even if you hire somebody once a year to wash your windows, it counts. It doesn't count if you hire someone to do work that you physically can't do, like power-wash your house, or specialty work like painting.
--For the sake of argument, let's also include "outdoors" staff: gardeners, landscapers, etc.
--If a physical disability requires you to employ a domestic helper, it doesn't count. I am interested in able-bodied people who choose to pay others to do their domestic work.

For the record, I have employed domestic servants in the past, but I would not again.

Your thoughts?

[RubyDuby in GA]

1. Holy crap YES!!!

If I could afford it. I'm never home anymore. I'm out campaigning every day these days. I groan as I come in at 11 each night and walk through the sty that has become my home.

If I could....I would.

[radwriter0555]

40. oh HELL yes, I have a maid and a gardener, I used to have a nanny

and a day care provider...

How can a single working parent not hire people to help?

[LizW]

2. I hired a man to repair the sheet rock in my dining room

when I took off the chair rail and molding. Physically I could do the work myself, but it would have taken me a LONG time. He did it in two mornings and did a much better job than I probably would have.

I have not ever hired a cleaning person (can't afford it) but I have lots of friends who do. So long as they pay them a fair wage, I have no problem with it at all.

[LiberalVoice]

3. I dunno

It would feel kinda weird asking someone to get me a glass of water if i'm sitting my lazy ass on the couch playing video games.

[markus]

4. Yes, a "nanny"

Actually, an all-day sitter for the kids the last two summers.

She was fantastic, and I would (and probably will, but not the same woman who's graduating college and will have a real job, we all hope).

Hell, I think we need a maid. I hate housework, my (full-time employed wife) kills herself at it because she has a very high standard.

I figure if we can figure out how to afford it, and pay fairly for it, why not?

[951]

5. No.

I'm not a rich fat bastard.

No offense rich people :D

[skygazer]

6. Never

Nor have I ever desired to. I like my privacy, I like my independence and I don't have any desires to have anything larger than I can comfortably care for myself.

[WilmywoodNCparalegal]

7. If I had money

and I were willing to:

-pay all the taxes associated with household helpers
-provide a good salary (above minimum wage)
-provide health care benefits

In other words, if I could treat this person decently, I would definitely hire a "domestic servant."

[ixion]

8. in the immortal words of Neil Young

A maaaaaaid, a man needs a maid.

You bet I would have one in a second if I could afford it.

[MsTryska]

9. hell yes.

if i had the money to, i totally would.


But then again, i come from a country where having a "helper" is just a matter of course when you are of a certain class.


it's a way of giving money/shelter/life to those who don't have any, whilst letting them keep their pride too.

[Shrek]

10. I have before and would again

The people I hired got good wages and decent working conditions, so I don't see any harm. They got employment and I got needed services. Works for me.

[Lost147]

12. don't really have servants

Somone comes to clean the house twice a week and somone to keep our yard looking good but thats it. Nothing too extravagent

[Bridget Burke]

11. I've considered it....

A neighbor hires a lady to come in once a week for cleaning. First, I'd need to reorganize & recycle a lot of stuff. My place is too much of a mess, right now! (Damn books, magazines, etc.)

I work full time. What's your problem with domestic help? Especially if they're paid fairly & treated well?

Edited to add a couple of questions: Why doesn't baby sitting count? Do you regard domestic work as demeaning? (I've waited tables & cooked for money.)

[SoCalDem]

13. We had a maid when I was a child.. BUT...

When we went to Panama, my mother commented on the cute little "playroom" next to the carport downstairs. The neighbors filled her in.. That was the "Maid's Room". We used it as a playroom and as a place for the stalks of bananas to ripen, for months..

One day, a Panamanian lady named Matilda got off the bus in front of our house, and "begged" for her old job back.. Apparently the people who had lived there before us, had hired her to iron, cook, and babysit. My mother was stunned to think that someone would be BEGGING for a job that paid $1.00 a day..

We did "hire" Matilda, but my folks paid her more, and gave her food from the commissary for her 6 kids.. She was willing to sleep over, but my family would not hear of it. My parents paid for her busfare so she could go home each night..

She did the laundry and cooked a bit.. Mostly she hung out with me and taught me Spanish, as I taught her English..and we went to the movies alot..

When we came back to the states, we gave her most of our furniture & stuff that we knew would not do well in Kansas.. (tropical woods crack like crazy when you take them out of the tropics)..

[bleedingheart]

21. that must have been a cool experience living in a different country

...I have a coworker who live in Panama and he has about three maids...I wonder what he is paying them....He is an elitist snob...so I can't imagine he treats them well.

[lapislzi]

34. My experience is similar

I lived in South Africa for 10 years and I literally did not know any better. I am ashamed. I have a huge karmic debt to pay off for my years of paying someone next to nothing for the privilege of living in squalor to clean up after me.

But I could no longer in good conscience pay someone to do my domestic work.

On the other hand (devil's advocate speaking), is it the most productive use of my time to spend it on domestic work? Is it more noble to be a doctor than a domestic?

[JerseygirlCT]

58. My family had a similar experience while living in the middle east -m

for a couple of years -- although just with a house-cleaner. He was a sweet man from Pakistan, I think. Mom didn't really want anyone, and to be honest, poor Gopie smelled so bad the house was nasty for a good day afterwards... But it would have been cruel not to offer the guy a chance to earn some money. The number of poor Pakistanis then, living in cardboard shacks so they could send every penny back home to their families... So sad.

Dad also had a Bahraini driver -- considered necessary by Bahrain standards for a businessman in order to get around. He was another very sweet man who'd bring the family the most awesome bread!

[Tafiti]

14. The way I see it...

...if you're wealthy, and can afford it, why not? Not because you can't do the work, or don't want to, but because you're helping someone make a better living for themselves and for their family. What's even better is if you pay them well. Isn't it better that the money is in someone else's pocket (who presumably needs it) than yours (assuming you're fairly well-off)?

[kayell]

15. I've never had the money to, but I would certainly hire someone to

do things where they would do a better job if I had the money. For example, I stripped, sanded and refinished my own wood floors. That is definitly a job that someone else could have done far better.

In the more commonly accepted since of a "domestic servant" being a live in or daily worker who does fairly ordinary jobs such as cooking or cleaning - probably not. I like my privacy, I like my stuff the way I like it, and it's unlikely I would ever need or want that kind of help, even if horticulturists suddenly become as highly paid as baseball players. LOL

[porphyrian]

16. No and yes.

If I could pay someone a fair wage for doing domestic work, I would. However, I'm a broke slob as it is, and I wouldn't wish my domestic work on anyone but myself as is.

[Bunny]

17. Well, I pay a guy to cut my grass. I'm sure I'll get a kid to shovel

snow, too. If I could afford a cleaning lady, I'd get one. I'm able-bodied, and real lazy. And I'll make no bones about it. Answered your question?

PS - I pay a sitter to watch my kids (at her house).

[Big Kahuna]

18. I would not.

It is akin to slavery. Every American (and everyone else for that matter) should have more dignified prospects than to be servile rump-swabs of the rich.

[DemBones DemBones]

65. Akin to slavery? Domestic help are paid, free, full

citizens (unless they're here illegally, in which case hiring them is illegal.)

There's no shame in doing domestic work; women have done it for centuries, both for their own families, and as domestic help.

Some people treat waiters/waitresses, clerks in stores, bank employess, etc. as "servile rump-swabs" and they may well be paid less than people who clean other people's homes for a living.

I've known several women who quit "respectable" jobs in business to work as housecleaners for better money and more flexible schedules.

As far as the very rich are concerned, we're all just cheap labor, whether we're maids or lawyers or physicians.

[bleedingheart]

19. I did hire a nanny to watch my daughter and son

I typically put my kids in daycare but my daughter was a preemie and even though I took four months off to make sure she was a chubby healthy little bebopper she got very sick in daycare..so I hired a nanny.

Now some will say...why not quit your job...but alas...my job was how my family got HEALTH CARE coverage and with two asthmatic kids and my asthma...we need it.

I had her work for me for about 8 months. She was a gem...but a bit fussy. I paid her very well and I expected her to do nothing else but watch my two kids...now every once in a while she would wash my floors or something but I would pay her extra...

My husband worked from home so...there was always an extra adult in the house...it was very convenient...

[Th1onein]

20. I have a maid who comes in once a week........

I don't WANT her to come in, but my company rents apartments for me that include all of the "extras," such as maid service. I wish they wouldn't do this, and I have TOLD them to stop it, but they won't, for some reason. I always leave this person extra money, if I'm not going to be here when she comes in, or I hand it to her, if I'm here when she's here. I don't want to cart a vacuum cleaner around with me, from place to place, so it does come in handy to have her vacuum the carpets, but that's all I allow her to do. It makes me feel AWFUL to see her work.

[NoBorders]

22. A nanny

there aren't many options for caring for pre-preschool children, like we have, when both parents work. We're not 'rich fat asses' or whatever people have said. Most of one of our salaries goes to the nanny. She gets close to triple minimum wage, I figure. We could put our kids in some form of daycare, but we're more comfortable with the individual care, and feel like we have more control over what happens.

We do pay the taxes, etc... it's totally legit.

[Forkboy]

23. I wouldn't feel comfortable doing so

but that's just me.I wouldn't begrudge anyone if they feel differently.

[DemExpat]

24. Yes.

I am always surprised at how a large part of the Philipino women who work here wages are sent to their families in the Phillipines.
One woman I know built her sons a house in the Phillipines with her hard-earned domestic help wages she earned here.

As long as they are paid good wages - often more than they would earn in an office or factory job - I feel it is mutually beneficial.

I saw a documentary last year about the Philipino Diaspora of women doing this type of work all over the world and how huge a part of the Phillipine's economy this has become........



DemEx

[mcar]

25. Yes

I had a wonderful woman care for my child for his first 4 years until I quit my job. She's like a grandmother to him.

At various times, I've had cleaning ladies, as well.

The point of this?

[MrSlayer]

26. I would if I could afford it.

I'd love to be rich enough to have a maid.

[sbj405]

27. very timely - BF and I have been having this disagreement for awhile

He's for it. I'm against it. I think he's for it mostly, because he doesn't want to have to do any work. ;-) He also grew up having domestic help. I did not. I think it's even weirder for me, because of the dogs, I would have to be home while said person was cleaning, so if I'm there, I might as well do the work and save the money.

That being said I did house sit for someone a few years back for over a month. They had a cleaning person come in once a week and it was nice to come home to a clean home.

[lapislzi]

36. It's GREAT coming home to a clean home

but what does your domestic servant go home to?

I am still squeamish about my experiences in South Africa. People lived in utter squalor and I lived well. I may not have created the system, but I definitely benefitted from it.

[radwriter0555]

41. Why do you have to be home when your helper cleans? I trust my

maid with my dogs; she cares for them WONDERFULLY, even my currently invalid dog, who has a broken leg.

A former BF who was tired of me being too tired to clean all the time turned me on to having help finally... now I can't imagine NOT having help in at least once a week.

Daysey is part of our family... she's babysat, house-sat, dog-sat; has worked for other friends and family, etc.

[Mountainman]

28. I would like to pay someone to clean the house once a week

My wife and I are very busy with our animals and chores like mending fences etc on weekends that we never get around to working inside. We both work during the week and by the time we are finished with dinner it is 8:00 PM.

I'd like to pay someone to come in on Fridays to clean the house real good.

[BiggJawn]

29. HAVE a Domestic? Shoot, I'm poor enough to BE a Domestic....

Never gave it any thought, because I have never been, nor do I ever anticipate, joining that Socio-economic class that worries about stuff like finding "good help"....

[William Bloode]

30. Hahahaha!

I'm in there with ya! I do landscaping work in a upper class 'hood by the country club, so i guess i could be called a domestic servant "the gardener". A proud one at that!

As long as the pays decent, i don't see a problem with it. If i don't feel i am being treated fairly i have no problem telling someone to get bent.

[BiggJawn]

64. Have any "Desperate Housewives" you work for?

Guess there's a new series on the Glass Tit about horney women who are"prisoners of privelege" and neglectd by their Captain of Industry hubbies....:7

[karlrschneider]

31. Sure, I had a sort of housekeeper (guess you could say "cleaning lady"

from Brazil (Rio) for years when I lived in Tampa. And no, I didn't ask for a green card or pay social security...she was a good worker, appreciated the opportunity to work and was absolutely the most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my 62 years. No apologies here.

[Miss Marmelstein]

32. Yes, we employ a couple....

and provide a one bedrooom apartment. She works as housekeeper/cook and he as gardener/caretaker. We live in Mexico and pay twice the going rate for live-in help. I do not see how this could be equalled with slavery as posted above.

[claudiajean]

33. Yes. Weekly gardener and cleaner.

I used to have a job that required 70 to 90 hour weeks on my part, but also compensated me at a level that I could afford skilled help with maintaining my home since I didn't have the time available to do so myself.

So I had a professional housecleaner in one morning a week to help me keep the dust and grime at bay (and much better than I could!), and a landscaper one day a week to mow the lawn and maintain the flower beds and ornamentals.

Like others on this thread have said, I think the key is that I was one of several clients, that the hourly rate I paid was very much in the professional living wage range (no minimum scraping-by wage), and their work was honored and appreciated for the skilled service it was.

[SudieJD]

35. My Hubby Did..

When we first met. I became good friends with her and we would shop together. Hubby didn't have time for housework (he owned his own business) and wasn't very good at it either.

She helped me with our wedding and we still email and talk.

I'm handicapped now with RA and severe osteo and have had to hire a couple to help me with the housework, house repairs and the lawn work. I'd love to be able to do these things myself, but just can't anymore. And, I'm not rich! Just like a clean house and mowed lawn.

Sudie in MN

[sphincter]

37. Yes.

I employ a live-in domestic helper which is quite common in these parts of the world. Since I am single with no kids and with me out of the house most of the time, I think she could be worse off. And besides, I am happy just as long as my shirts are clean and ironed.

[Eric J in MN]

38. No (nt)

nt

[Djinn]

39. yes and no I s'pose

one of our neighbours mows our lawn occasionally but I'd never have someone clean my house - I don't like the idea of someone being in my house when I'm not there and I could sit there in the house while someone else cleaned it.

If you can pay decent wages and provide decent conditions then I don't have anything ethically against it just don't like the thought of someone else cleaning my grot.

[Logansquare]

42. I have a cleaning lady. My mother used to work as one, so

I'm a very good client and reasonable in my expectations. I don't feel any shame associated with either working as a domestic servant or in hiring one, as long as the money is good and the job is treated with the dignity it deserves.

I've hired a friend who owns a window-washing business to do my house, and it was an excellent buy.

[Name removed]

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[Name removed]

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[claudiajean]

45. Ah, a freeper disruptor..

Buh-bye!

[Swamp Rat]

46. It won't take long

[Lorien]

47. Yes

I'm self employed and my schedule gets so hectic that I just don't have time to do housework and gardening. I prefer to hire individuals instead of teams through an agency; agencies are safer, but their pay for their employees is terrible!

[patricia92243]

48. If you were the domestic help needing a job, you'd be glad somebody hired

you to do their work.

[Cleita]

49. Very rarely.

Sometimes I was the domestic worker and have friends who do such work. I don't see anything wrong with it as long as the worker isn't exploited. Many women I know have made a nice little self-employed business as house cleaners. A couple I know, who are gourmet cooks, do quite well as a butler/chef hire. They are usually well paid, with benefits and get to live in some very nice estates, often where the employers are absent most of the year.

I have also known European teenagers brought over here as au pairs or nannies, who have found themselves working 16/7 doing everything in the house for room and board and an allowance, sometimes as low as $100 a month. You'd be surprised of whom of the rich and famous exploit these kids until someone like myself sets them straight.

[The Straight Story]

50. My Wife

:) (ducking for cover)

[TrustingDog]

51. lol. I'm the domestic servant in my house...

but if it were a matter of hiring someone else to do the valueless (?) shit jobs iffen I had the cash, and he or she did them good nuff for me... hey, they're family.

[skippysmom]

52. I don't think I would

even if I had the money, which I don't. Something about it would be uncomfortable for me. I don't know why, and if others want to, be my guest, but I can't imagine doing it.

[Cleita]

53. So if you ever used a public restroom are you saying

you wouldn't use it? Or would you not go to a motel because someone cleaned your room. Even going to a restaurant, means someone cooked your meal and cleaned up after you. I used to work as a campground host and I had to clean pit toilets and other messes campers left. It's a job just like any other and it should be adequately compensated for.

[supernova]

54. I've often dreamed about having a butler

being a single not-so-very-domestic woman, having a butler appeals to me. He can cook, do the laundry and make sure the household runs well. I just enjoy it.

Yeah, right. When I make my first million. :eyes:

edit: I do pay someone to mow my lawn but it's because I couldn't do it all by myself. Yes, it's a BIG yard.

[ulysses]

55. *SNARF*

Sorry, I'm just trying to imagine being able to afford domestic help. :D

[supernova]

56. Get that little one doing dishes, pronto!

:D

[JerseygirlCT]

57. Oh yeah!

When we finally bought a house, someone to cut the lawn was something we figured into the costs of maintaining the house.

We're also blessed to have a friend who cleans -- she charges us a ridiculously low amount to clean the house every other week. When I try to pay her more, she gets upset... (And no, she won't take on any new people!)

Another good friend does gutters in the spring and fall. He likes to pick up some extra money -- we're pretty clueless about these sort of house maintainence things -- it's a win-win so far as we're all concerned.

So, yes, guilty on many counts. And pretty happy about it.

[Stuckinthebush]

59. I had one come today

She is great...comes every two weeks to deep clean the house. With three kids, we actually could use her help every week!

Able bodied, but extremely tired at the end of the day. How did you get so down on domestic help? I don't get that.

[David Zephyr]

60. I Don't, But I Would Have No Problem Doing So.

In our home, we do all of the house cleaning ourselves and have always done so. We can certainly afford to have help, but we choose not to. Still, there are a great many circumstances where people need help and as long as one is fair in payment and one's expectations from the worker and as long as the working environment is safe, then by all means there is nothing wrong about such work or the people who do the work.

Work is noble.

[ibegurpard]

61. If I could afford it

in a heartbeat. My mother's cleaning person makes more per hour than I do. LOL.

[StupidFOX]

62. Not usually

Unless I lived alone (nobody to split work with) and can pay well.

[Red State Rebel]

63. Yes, housekeeper and landscaping help...

We own a business that keeps us very busy. I used to have a housekeeper on a regular basis but didn't for a while, now I'm thinking about it again.

I had two guys out this summer help me with some landscaping jobs for a couple days.