How do you look at your Republican friends,...who are voting..

[Maat]

for *, and not dislike them (intensely), when they are sending the Country down the toilet (me being especially concerned about my daughter's future)? (Republican friends and family)

I took Constitutional law, and it pains me greatly to see Mr. A*croft disrespecting the Constitution, the Bill of Rights, and the case law so much (e.g. the death penalty for drug offenders).

I feel that we will endure unconscionable destruction of our national system and values with another four years of *.

I'm going to take a break to go to Church (lib-ur-al church).

Please have some encouraging words for me when I get back.

[Jon8503]

1. Its not easy. By the way congrats on your working on your law

degree. I know it is not easy, we just got my wife's son thru law school. Thankfully, he is working now.

[Maat]

7. Thanks. I'm 'chilling' 'til I get my bar results - 2 months.

n/t

[liberalmuse]

2. I haven't been able to visit my non-voting friend.

I'm too upset. She has a draft aged son and she is so anti-social she has never voted in her life and never will.

Some of my Republican friends are so brainwashed by right wing radio and their religion there is no hope for them as far as trying to steer them from voting for Bush. We don't discuss politics because it gets too heated. I haven't been able to visit w/them lately, either. Thankfully, I have very few Republican friends.

I am very upset with my mother. She has two grandkids who are or will be draft age, yet she will be voting for Bush. She is so brainwashed by TBN and those evil elfin preachers that she could care less if her grandkids will get drafted. The deaths of thousands of Iraqi's has absolutely no effect on her. She hates life and is just wating to die so she can live in her mansion in the sky. I think people this miserable hate this world, so they vote for Bush to get it all over with.

Most of my friends and family are Democrat and will be voting for Kerry.

BTW, I have great respect for liberal Christians when I come across them--you know, the ones who actually read what Jesus was about and try to live it. Enjoy church!

[Hubert Flottz]

3. RE: "(e.g. the death penalty for drug offenders)."

You'll scare Rush!

[skygazer]

4. It's very difficult

I have a hard time not being bitter and confrontational. As a matter of fact, throughout this election season, I have had more than one nasty fight in my family (my father and daughter in particular are big Bush supporters and it makes me physically ill to think about).

My father insists that Bush is a "good and honest man" which makes me want to puke. My daughter keeps saying that it's just fine if we give up some of our civil liberties in order to keep us "safe" which just alarms me.

I no longer debate it with either of them - neither will change their minds and I certainly won't change mine. My only hope is that someday they will see that they were wrong and I was right. Doubt it, though. My dad still thinks Nixon got hosed. ~sigh~

[leftofthedial]

5. I won't forgive them

Truth, right, morality, freedom and reason are more important to me than a "friendship" with a fascist.

[morillon]

6. This one's tough for me, too.

One of my closest friends in the world is a Republican and former dittohead. This year, he's so disgusted that he's not voting at all. I know he's worried about the direction the country is going under this administration.

I have family members and other friends who are diehard Republicans, and a few of them still publicly support Bush. I'm not so sure about those who have been conspicuously silent about the issue over the last six months. Maybe they're reconsidering?

I do know that, if Bush is still in office after the middle of January, it will be all but impossible for me to pretend NOT to be very unhappy with any friends who voted for Bush. That's not to say they'd become enemies, but I think I would be too brokenhearted and dismayed (not to mention angry and scared to death) to want to make nice with them. It makes me sad to say it, but I do think that Bush continuing in office would affect my friendships with people who supported him.

[Maat]

10. Thanks, Fellow DUers!

I particularly relate to being scared of family members being drafted. My daughter's too young.

[annabanana]

19. Everyone's too young....................................

so much for "pro-life". Every person killed in this debacle is a story cut short, a hole in the fabric of life and in the hearts of their loved ones. It is murder most foul.

[Indykatie]

14. I refuse to Support Self-Employed Republicans.

So far, I have switched the company that maintains my lawn, found a new Avon lady and changed cleaners. Some of these small business folks are struggling financially but continue to support Bush policies. I don't get it. I was floored one day when my ex-Avon lady professed that she "hated" Kerry. When pressed for an explanation she gave me some mumbo jumbo about him being a traitor to his country. I exploded on her. I'm fortunate enough to have NO republicans in my close circle and only moderate republicans in my office some of whom are voting Kerry as a protest vote.

[BiggJawn]

8. *WHAT* ReTHUGlican "friends"?

I have ReTHUGS for co-workers and clients, who I treat cordially and professionally.

I have no "ReTHUGlican Friends". I don't have many friends anyway, I sure as shit ain't gonna waste my time and emotions on some dildo-head fucker who'd rather see me dead or in Gitmo...

Remember: Friends don't let Friends vote ReTHUGlican.

[CrispyQ]

9. I no longer speak or write to my mother.

Months ago, when it became apparent that we could not discuss politics, I asked her to not bring it up in conversation or email. She still does, so I delete her email without reading & don't call her. She can set two less places at her holiday table this year as we won't be attending. And if the Dim-son steals the election, she'll be waiting till 2008 -- assuming another PNAC puppet isn't put into office then.

It's very sad, but one of the things I've noticed is that the repubs will continue to send & discuss thier offensive views even when you've requested them not to. It's an extension of their lack of respect for so many things. I'm sorry if some of them are family/friends, but life is too short to waste time with these people.

[arwalden]

21. I'm In A Similar Polarized Situation With My Father...

... but fortunately we've agreed to avoid discussing politics ever again. No chain-letter emails. No Clinton jokes. No Bush jokes. Nothing! --- We don't even discuss religion.

-- Allen

P.S. During one visit to my home, he was unsuccessful in locating FOX News on our cable system. What he didn't realize was that I had "deleted" the FOX News listing from the on-screen guide. It didn't matter to me that he only wanted to watch it (privately) in the guest room... I refused to have those signals in my house.

I don't think he ever figured out why it was unavailable. Perhaps he still thinks that Maryland is so Democratic that the local cable systems won't carry it.

[Mz Pip]

11. I don't have

any Republican friends.

MzPip
:dem:

[shanti]

20. same here

!!!!

[swag]

12. I have R acquaintances and workmates, but no R friends

Not that the R gets them filtered out. But somehow all the Rs get filtered out.

As far as family, I just put up with them.

[arwalden]

13. I Have *NO* Republican Friends!! Republicans Are Vile Worthless Trash

I choose my friends carefully and Republicanism is a NON-NEGOTIABLE deal-breaker. (I only wish I could choose my family members just as easily.)

-- Allen

[Warpy]

15. Good people get to be wrong

That's all we have to know. Are they good people, otherwise? Then they're just wrong. We've all had the experience of being wrong about somehting. Sometimes when we changed our minds, it was painful.

Good people can be persuaded. If you haven't been able to persuade them, understand that they're just not ready to admit they've been wrong. To admit they were wrong about Idiot is to admit they were gullible and easily led, and that is not easy.

Look at the person, not the politics. Respecting someone's right to be completely wrong about something is a beginning, not an end.

That doesn't mean accepting bullying from Freepers. Remember, "good" is the operative word here.

[BiggJawn]

34. "Good people"? As in the "Good Germans"...

...Who lived downwind of Buchenwald?

Stop trying to make us "sing the Rain-Bo Song", please.

"Good people"....OK, so we already know what the ReTHUGlican party stands for. Obviously, we don't agree with those tennents, else we'd be ReTHUGs, too.
Now, HOW can a person be a "Good" person if they support second-class citizenship for women, even worse treatment for Gays, the unilateral invasion and dropping of bombs on a country and people who posed no danger to us...

Need I go on?

Why not say something totally ridiculous like "Jeffery Dahmer wasn't a bad guy, as long as you weren't a young Asian guy, and he wasn't hungry..."

we can overlook a little canabalism, right?

I didn't think so.

[Mr E McSquare]

16. They're scared shitless

Just like all the flag wavers.

[Nikia]

17. I try to care about them anyway

Perhaps I should get more confrontational with them. Perhaps, they would see that the country is not headed in the right direction. Perhaps they would see that Bush is only doing things in his own interest, not the interest of the country. Some of them do have different fundamental beliefs than myself on certain issues, which reinforces their idea to vote for Bush. Some of them personally don't trust Kerry, although I don't know how they could personally trust Bush. One coworker stated that Bush is a good speaker who speaks to people like her, and I don't know what to say to that because I just don't get it.
Despite all this, I don't see any reason to break with them. My two sets of grandparents belonged to the two separate parties. Both sets were active with their local party. Despite this, they both were friends with people of both. My Democrat grandparents were more vocal on a personal level than my Republican grandparents, but my vocal grandparents still invited people over again after kicking them out after a heated debate a few days before. I have learned to be tolerant of people, even if they are wrong. Perhaps, I should learn to be more assertive though and tell them why they are wrong.

[porphyrian]

18. Any republican who isn't actively trying to defeat bush...

...is a traitorous piece of shit. Fuck republicans. I can't be friends with them.

[ProgressiveFool]

26. This is the hardest thing about the whole election

My best friend, my brother, tons of others I know and talk to every day are fanatic Republicans. That's the problem with living in a place like Orange County - it's cool to be cruel.

I look around at these people I hang out with at parties or bars, and hear a subtle heartlessness, and a desperate wish to be the doer and not the done. That's just the way the world works, I'm told. Life is not about dignity, honor, integrity, honesty. It's about getting your licks in before someone else gets a chance to get their licks in on you.

I can't not be confrontational anymore. If Bush wins, I don't know what I'm going to do. Probably a good idea to move.

[newyawker99]

30. Hi ProgressiveFool!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[txindy]

33. Welcome!

At least you've found good support here at DU, if not in Orange County. It'll help, I think, especially in these next couple of weeks.

[devinsgram]

22. Last night at my granddaughter's 13th birthday party

I happened to get into a conversation with a friend of my daughters who was complaining about not making as much money as she did the year before (works for a big hotel in catering). Said she is down thousands of dollars. By the end of the evening we get into a conversation about the upcoming election, and she tells me she is going to vote for *. I tried to explain a couple of things to her, including why she is losing money and she said she really doesn't know that much about any of that stuff to have a conversation about it, she just watched the beginning of the first debate and liked something the idiot said and that was it. She wouldn't continue.

On my way home I just wanted to cry. I try so hard to understand, but I just don't. I have lost so much respect for anyone that would vote for this idiot.

[juslikagrzly]

23. No repug friends

but many repug family members. We just don't talk politics, although I must say I've been sneaking in comments, especially to my mom, about issues she should care about like medicare, health care costs, social security, the deficit. She hasn't responded negatively so I make the assumption that perhaps I am gaining ground.

it's a different story with my repug brother, and my husband's repug sister and her husband. In fact, I am contemplating sending a rather hateful email to my brother asking him to never, ever send me any more anti-Kerry emails. He recently sent me a piece of crap titled "no matter what your political affiliation, everyone should know this" and it was about Teresa Heinz Kerry's company ownership. Asshat!

Divided, we fall, and it's just about there folks

[Blue Gardener]

38. Always "Reply to All" when he sends them...

With facts refuting whatever crap was in the email. My cousin stopped sending me right wing garbage after I did that.
My sister and her family are the only repugs I spend any time with, and we know not to talk politics. She is the only sibling out of five that is not voting for Kerry. But, she's the only one that goes to a fundie Baptist church.

[graywarrior]

24. Ugh! My sister has dual citizenship in Canada and Mass and she's

voting for Bush by absentee ballot. I have not spoken to her since she told me that several months ago. There are other family issues involved, but that broke the camel's back. It's not just the vote, it's her entire attitude about gays, religeon (she's a born-again), women's rights, and so forth. I can't believe we grew up under the same democratic household.

[neebob]

25. I have five Republican Bush-voting friends -

one neighbor and four co-workers. The neighbor is a serious freeper. He's a good person, but he gets on my nerves, always wanting to debate things - which I don't enjoy, because I don't think there's anything to debate and have concluded it's not worth trying to convince someone who can't see the obvious - and I avoid him.

The co-workers are quieter, possibly because they're massively outnumbered in a veritable bleeding-heart liberal Bush-bashing heaven. I don't think they're raging wingnuts - more like traditional Republicans. All very smart, accomplished people with whom I've worked for years and respect for other reasons.

One I don't have much interaction with and don't know very well. The one time we started to converse on a personal level, I said something about my mother spewing right-wing bullshit, and he said, "I like that stuff." So I changed the subject and the bonding session ended.

Another is a woman I just love and have a lot in common with. She's willing to listen and look at the other side, but in the end, she supports the troops and what have you. Perhaps I give her a break because she was raised a Jehovah's Witness and I, having been raised Mormon, know how it affected her mind. With me you get a free pass if you're a former cult member.

One I only just recently found out is a Republican, when I noticed a "Veterans for Bush" sticker on his SUV. As it happens, he's the smartest and most accomplished of the bunch. I'll admit I've looked at him differently since I saw the sticker but so far have managed to resist the urge to ask him what his deal is. He bought me a drink yesterday.

The fiftth person is the VFB guy's wife. I'm not sure she's a Republican, but she gets very quiet and looks uncomfortable when the Bush-bashing starts. I asked her about the sticker, and she said, "Oh, that's {her husband's}," and volunteered nothing. If she's not a Republican, she clearly believes politics is a private matter.

Funny thing about that sticker - it first appeared at a party at someone's home, and everybody was all, "Yikes! Whose car is that?" Bush lovers in our midst. It was kind of this creepy mystery until we figured out whose vehicle it was.

I don't know, I seem somehow able to set aside the political stupidity and find other reasons to respect my co-workers. If I could do the same thing with my mom, I'd be in business.

On edit, after correcting math I'm not willing to update because, obviously, I can't even count to five:

I realize I have six Republican friends. Another co-worker recently told me her husband - with whom I worked at another place several years ago and count as a friend - has conservative leanings and is torn, but always comes back to siding with Bush, and she's frustrated. Hopefully she'll bring him around in the next two weeks.

[peacebuzzard]

27. I had to refrain from contact with my R friend, lately, I found the

friendship spiral downward and was increasingly uneasy with our relationship. It is hard to make friends when I have moved constantly my whole life, and this friendship started during my 1st divorce 20 yrs ago, and was primarily superficial. You know, long distance phone calls, (after I had moved away) postcards, Xmas cards, and after 4 yrs overseas government work realized it was the only stateside contact I had. Before you know it, another 10 yrs of phone calls and Xmas cards and now, with this politically charged environment, I realized who this person was and I am now bored and disappointed. She now has more than her share of personal problems so to be honest, I have cut all initiated contact. She has called me, but I primarily just listen to her rants and I now delete her emails which contain some anti-Dem rhetoric. I just don't have the energy left to try to convince or debate anymore than I have to. I have plenty to do that is positive.

[in_cog_ni_to]

28. I don't have any repuke friends.

I find those people repulsive.

[Coyote_Bandit]

29. Have Faith in Your Convictions

I live in JOklahoma - the armpit of the Bible Belt.

I do have Republican friends here.

I've found that I have had to avoid discussing politics with some of them. I most cases these have been relationships that became more distant over time.

I've also found that there are a fair number of closet democrats in this place - including some that work on staff at fundamentalist churches and other religious organizations. These are folks that are afraid to speak their political views or be politically active due to possible repercussions - usually employment related. Some of these folks actually appreciate the opportunity to discuss politics - assuming of course that the discussion is discreet.

I went to a Christian university and to a Christian law school. Actually studied under some of the guys that wrote some of the right wing fundamentalist books that have inspired some of the fundies. And I love to argue with them. My educational background is certainly a plus - at least in that situation. I argue with them using logic and evidence that they accept and incorporating logic and evidence that the rest of the world accepts. It is not always a waste of time. Though I must admit that I have considerably less contact with this group since I have refused to darken a church door after getting hacked off at the republican political rally that was held in church one Sunday morning.

I enjoy discussing politics and economics and I am a bit of a news junkie. Most of the people who know me understand and accept
that. Certainly, everyone knows where I stand with respect to the upcoming election. I respect their choices. As a matter of principle I don't judge people because of their attitudes, opinions or behaviors. Even though what they do or think may be wrong I try to treat them with respect. Though I must admit that I find myself pulling away from republican friends who are still supporting the shrub.

I don't know what I will do if the shrub remains in office. Employment prospects here are worse than bleak. And I have not had any success elsewhere. I do not want to leave the country but I will if that is what I have to do to find work.

There are no easy answers. But I do find strength in my convictions.

[Arugula Latte]

31. Republican friends?

That's an oxymoron to me. :shrug:

[ismnotwasm]

32. I've been avoiding the few I know

I have one in particular, who in one dimension is a kind, generous loving person. I don't understand how he can consider voting for *. I have found that he stays deliberately ignorant on certain issues. He is an excellent tax accountant and has many wealthy clients, which might explain some of his stupid shit. I have a nominal understanding of economics, and he, despite knowing every conceivable way to get out of paying taxes, seems to be clueless on larger economic issues. He thought that $300.00 bribe-disguised as tax cut people received was "helping them". His wife, who is my best friend, and who comes from A LOT of wealth, wouldn't spit on * if he was on fire. She just watched 9/11 and is currently not speaking to her husband. He just refused to watch it.

[Zhade]

35. I don't. It's quite simple, really...

If they vote for that traitor, they are no longer my friends.

I can forgive them for being suckered in 2000. After these past four years, anyone who doesn't see this man's crimes is not worth my time - at least until they realize the truth about this country.

[TexasSissy]

36. I'm so mad I could spit on them, but I contain myself. I am not very

friendly with them, I must say. I'm not rude. But I don't go out of my way to have lunch with them or contact them.

Same thing with my Repub brother and his wife, who had the nerve to send me one of those disgusting fake lie e-mails about Kerry.

From my observation, the Repubs are either of two types (that I know): unobservant, unknowledgeable housewives who simply "vote for God", and selfish, greedy, money-oriented wealthy people who see the world only from the perspective of "IT'S ALL ABOUT ME."

So they're not the best friends I have, anyway. (or relatives)

[Selwynn]

37. Honestly, I look at them as ignorant

I realize that's a little insulting to them. But I don't have any republican friends who are hate-mongering vile people. I know that there are republicans out there who are like that, but its not surprising that I don't have any friends like that - how could I be friends if there was no common ground in our friendship.

Most of the friends I have who have historically voted republican have struggled greatly this election. It seems to me like they are experiencing an extreme clash between the ideologies that have been burned into their brains for years and their personal values - it feels contradictory to them. Whether or not they will actually vote against bush will be directly related to their ability to break free from their past indoctrination and unreflective thinking and see clearly.

If some of these friends vote for Bush, I will be able to think that they made a mistake without hating them for it - I can understand how this confrontation between their longstanding ideology and reality can be a challenging and slow process of realization. All I can do is do my very best to help them as they ask questions and struggle with understanding. I do that by sharing my perspective with an attitude of openness, and sharing my perspective with them in such a way that they don't feel threatened or attacked.

[datasuspect]

39. it's sad

to see so many good people snookered into their right wing positions.

it sucks even worse when your boss is a freeper.

i can have no intellectual respect for a * supporter.

[Maat]

40. Thanks for the input.

My hubby deals with the fundie-in-laws for me. Thank God. I'm polite for the sake of my child.

[rucky]

41. I've lost quite a few friends

by choice. I want nothing to do with them anymore & can't respect them.

[deadparrot]

42. A lot of them I can't blame. They're rich. Really rich.

It's my friends who the one-issue types that really get me...they're extremely anti-abortion, so they'll support * for that reason. I've given them so many examples of *'s contempt for human life, and they don't care, it's all about abortion for them.

[sffreeways]

43. I have

no republican friends. None. And I don't bother with the republican relatives. We just don't get along so there is no point.

I'm a flaming homo and the fact that they would vote for Bush is just one other aspect of their personalities I don't care for.