Should God have a wife?

[Cleita]

When I lived in Idaho I had a church going type friend, whom I used to like to tweak about religious stuff, not mean things, but just enough to make her a little bit uncomfortable. One day she annoyed me so much with her anti-feminist religious views that I asked her why she was so sure God was a man. He could be a woman I told her. She surprised me when she said that she secretly believed that God had a wife.

I hadn’t thought about this for a long time but when you think about it, shouldn’t conservative kool-aid drinking religious folks be worried about God being gay or something since there seems to be no Mrs. God? Of course if you have a Mrs. God, it sort of blows away the whole monotheism thing doesn’t it? She would have to be a God too.

Naturally, since marriage, according to the religious, is about having children, shouldn’t the Gods have kids? Of course if you have a bunch of Godlings, then you end up back on Mt. Olympus.

Welcome back to paganism, courtesy of conservative Christian family values!

[Starlight]

1. Um, I don't think God is a person...or has sexual organs...

Of course I have actually heard people say that God is the old guy with the long beard that Michelangelo painted.

[SaintAnne]

3. sex

then why the hell is he/she/it so freakin obsessed with sex?

[Starlight]

8. I don't think God is obsessed with sex...

I think people claiming to be religious are the ones obsessed with sex. IMO there is no connection between the two.

[SaintAnne]

16. ummm

ummmm but I wonder, and maybe I'm corrupted by reading (God: A Biography) but in the first half, all god seems to care about is sex and kids.

[brainwashed]

61. He's got his eye on Mrs. Claus

He has been waiting for quite some time for Santa to either get a divorce or for Santa to have an accidental death. Then he will move in and we will have a Mrs. God (if they are willing to show their genitals to prove they are of the opposite sex). I did research this from the bible. See Isaiah or however you spell it 3:18

[Cleita]

5. Oh, but excuse me, the Bible says we were made in His image.

I definitely have sex organs. I know what you are saying and I agree, but I am talking about the beliefs of those who take the Bible literally.

[SaintAnne]

10. oo okay

I hate people who take the bible literally. It's all creative writing! and what a lovely piece of writing it is! but still, a piece of writing made by some bored white guys

[Starlight]

13. what SaintAnne said....n/t

[realisticphish]

21. image, perhaps

but not neccessarily funtion. after all, a tenet of christianity is that god is immortal


:hippie: The Incorrigible Democrat

[WLKjr]

39. Go BUCKS!!!!!!

piss on ann arbor, lol.

[realisticphish]

43. lol

and im on campus, bwa ha ha ha....but no riots yet


:hippie: The Incorrigible Democrat

[WLKjr]

44. Cuz I think some are still in shock

according to my mom, she was shocked and still can't believe it. But I just told her, "Mom, I knew they were going to win. I emailed them a playbook everynight for the past week!" lol


final score was like 30 somethin wasn't it to 21?

[realisticphish]

48. 37-21

we held Hart, who had rushed something 6 consecutive games with over 200 yards, to 61 yards. Troy Smish got 145 yards rushing. ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY FIVE. Where the HELL was this team all season???


:hippie: The Incorrigible Democrat

[WLKjr]

51. Big T. realized he needed a job next year?

:shrug: :D


so um yeah I hear we go to the rose bowl this year for the first time since 1984?

[realisticphish]

52. lol

i dont think he was at risk...the ol' sweater vest has grown on us. thank GOD we got rid of cooper, tressel is a godsend


:hippie: The Incorrigible Democrat

[AuntPatsy]

18. He made man in his image so he obviously had sexual organs..

[Cadence]

27. That explains why a lot of people believe in a God that's

remarkably similar to Santa Claus.

[lizzieforkerry]

2. I don't know but I am convinced that

that Jesus was married to Mary Magdalene, and they had a child. I actually believed this before reading The Davinci Code, so that book was not quite the shocker for me as it was for others.

[madrchsod]

4. mother earth

we all go back to mother earth

[Starlight]

11. That's what I believe.

And these freakin fundies are going to burn in hell for raping God. :nuke:

[LostInAnomie]

6. According to a religious archaeologist that came to town recently...

... and did a presentation over his research, God did have a wife. At least according Hebrew artifacts archaeologists have recently found. As time went on and the religion became more patriarchal the wife was phased out.

[Cleita]

9. Ashtoreth was the wife not spoken of in the Bible.

She was also know as Astarte and Ishtar a primo Mesopotamian fertility goddess, often worshipped by visiting temple prositute priestesses.

[Name removed]

7. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[HeeBGBz]

12. You must show your sexual organs to get a marriage license

Marriage can only be between a penis and a vagina.

Omnipotence need not apply.

However, God may have a ho.

[Starlight]

15. LOL, I'm laughing so hard at your post...

I'm snorting coffee out my nose. Actually it's a latte. Cause I'm a liberal, you know. ;)

[SaintAnne]

17. starbucks?

are you a starbucks liberal?:P

[Starlight]

25. Actually it IS Starbucks *French* roasted beans purchased at Costco,

ground in a Starbucks Barista burr grinder & brewed in a Starbucks Barista espresso machine. With steamed organic milk. Are they going to come & put me in a concentration camp now? :scared:

[SaintAnne]

26. NO

concentration camp for having starbucks???????? that's a crime against humanity, against the universe!!!!!!! Starbucks is the best, absolutley postively the best!!!!!!!! I love love love love starbucks!!!!!!! (my favorite is a white chocolate mocha with soymilk, mmmmmmmmmmmmmm now I want one)

[madrchsod]

31. that is very, very funny on alot

of levels...brillant...

[Bigmack]

14. Shore... he has a wife...

... after all, who's gonna wash up them dishes and split the fahrwood! God's just like everbuddy else, he needs hep around the homestead... needs him a bedwarmer fer them cold nights, if you catch mah drift.

Whut ah wanna know is how many of them angels can hoedown on the head of a pin.

- - - - -

I can't believe these conversations take place in the 21st Century.

[immoderate]

19. At least a girlfriend

Socializing at that level is so difficult without one.

--IMM

[Cleita]

22. LOL

What an observation!

[immoderate]

35. Yeah. When you imagine a personal god...

Like we are in his or her image, how can you not speculate on his habits, preferences, interests, hobbies? Where does he vacation?

You know, what makes him tick? All we get is what pisses him off!

--IMM

[sam sarrha]

20. interesting .... there is a god realm in Buddhism... similar to the human

but all blissed out with power... the gods are born and they die there.. if they are born there.. must me a female god.. thus wife or mate.. it isn't expounded on because it isn't really important to liberation. but the Wheel of Life is in www.buddhanet.net

[davekriss]

23. I thought God DID have a wife?

Somewhere in scripture it is said the church is a bride to Jesus. And since Jesus, God, and the Holy Spirit are one, then God has a wife.

Couldn't tell you where to find this in scripture, but maybe someone else out there can...

[sangh0]

24. Only if you want think like a religious conservative

but if you prefer liberalism, you'd think that God had no gender and no genitals

[Maine Mary]

28. I think you like sound someone who needs help

I don't consider myself qualifed to go any further then to say that it appears that you have issues w/women.

[Cleita]

30. I have issues about women.

Yes I do. I think women need to have equal representation in government, need to make equal pay to what men make, need to have health care for their children and day care if needed. Women need to have control over their bodies without any interference from men or government. Yes, I am very much into women's issues.

[Maine Mary]

53. Yup

You can say all the right things but sometimes attitude slips in here and there. A person who has survived and recovered from an abusive relationship can spot it miles away no mater how subtle.

[Cleita]

54. You've got me.

I have no idea what you are talking about.

I'm very sorry that you had to endure an abusive relationship. No one should. This is one of the problems of our society that it doesn't recognize how serious this problem is because of an "oh well women ask for it" attitude, I guess, or maybe because it is a woman, it's not as important as some guy's car getting smashed up. I know our society thinks that way.

This is the reason I got mad at my friend in Idaho because she was such a doormat to her husband and it had to do with thier religion a lot. No she wasn't abused, just taken for granted.

Whatever you want to believe, and it's your privilege, have a pleasant and peaceful holiday season.

[Behind the Aegis]

29. Wife? OR Hermaphrodite!?

If you are a literalist, and believe He created mankind in His image, then He would have both sex organs. He created Adam and Lilith from the Earth in His image, therefore, logic (I know, I know...no logic is allowed in religion, I am making a point!) would dictate He would have BOTH sets! Probably depends on His mood! :)

[Cleita]

34. How about that Lilith.

Now there was a girl after my own heart. She just didn't take any of that sexist, I am the master, crap from Adam did she?

[Behind the Aegis]

41. She sure didn't, but like all strong women, she paid a price!

She stood her ground and refused to submit...her reward? Written out of Christian Mythology and reviled in Hebrew mythology! She is a true symbol of men's hatred of a strong woman!

[Cleita]

42. Yeah, but she beat mortality.

Because she left the Garden of Eden before the fall, she supposedly still wanders the earth because she retained her immortality.

[fujiyama]

67. God is a MAN?

I thought he was a woman.

Maybe he got a sex change...He's transexual.

[Cheney Killed Bambi]

32. Weird question

It's like asking

WHich gender does God prefer


Sorry if that sounded disrespectful, but when you start going down that road, that's what happens

[Cleita]

36. This is one of the roads you go down when you

start insisting on being literal about the Bible.

[lenidog]

33. Well its like this

It seems that in pre-Babylonian Exile Judaism God did have a wife who sorta got edited out of the picture. There have been finds of early Jewish synagogues and temples with blessings such as may Yahweh and his wife Ashtoreth bless you. So it seems that God did have a wife but either the monotheists or the misogynists struck and took her out of the picture. I mean really you can't have a female deity can you the next thing you know women may claim that they are the equeals of men.;-)

[Cleita]

38. My point exactly.

Also, others missed my point about monotheism. When Ashtoreth got thrown out of the temple, they still kept the phallus (lots of references to pillars in the Bible) and the masculinity of the diety intact, which means their idea of God did embody a penis. So therefore, is their God gay?

[Cadence]

37. Well the only difference technically between a man and a woman

is hormone levels. I know what you are going to say.."well that's not the ONLY difference." Hang on. I'm getting there.

Hormone levels are what determine which sex organs grow but each embryo initially has the potential to go either way, y and x chromosomes are what determine which hormone is going to be dominant. Even then it's not a perfect system. You can give a man estrogen and he will grow breasts. I don't even want to get into hermaphrodites.

So to follow this logic of God being a man so he could take a wife we would have to suppose that God has a lot of testosterone so he can be male right?
So how does God have testosterone without a physical body? Are there non physical purely consciousness molecules of testosterone that we haven't discovered yet floating around in the ethers?

I bet that's it. Hormones are circulating in the atmoshpere right now and we don't know about it. I bet that explains crop circles too!!
:think:

[Cleita]

40. You are making an assumption that the God in the Bible

doesn't have a body. It would seem to me that if He were omni everthing that they say He is, He wouldn't just limit himself to being a spirit. Also according to Catholics, Jesus and his human body went to Heaven and since Jesus is just one part of the Trinity, well.....you can see how this gets complicated. I have to warn you I used to drive my theology teachers crazy, taking their premises down roads they hadn't intended.

[Cadence]

46. It was actually supposed to be a joke.

:freak:


But thanks for the warning...I don't want to be driven crazy tonight. I did that yesterday.

[Cleita]

49. So was mine.

:hi:

[UncleSepp]

58. Driven crazy? What, you have a chauffeur?

My husband takes the bus to crazy every weekday morning. Most of the people on the bus must be on the night shift coming home, because they've mostly already been to crazy. At least, that's what I figure...

[dweller]

45. why?

is God even looking for a wife?

i mean, i understand some folk didn't even believe Dennis Kucinich could ever be considered for Pres w/out one...but i dunno.

Can't an individual, or in this case, some purported diety, make that decision for themself? Perhaps this God feels complete without another. That may very well be the case. . .

In fact, i suspect my view, or opinion or decision wouldn't be worth a grain of sand in the grand scale of things. So i'm not sending a toaster oven or some such wedding gift either.

dp

[karlrschneider]

47. How big is his penis? Infinite? This shit is so fucking stupid....

:grr:

[Cleita]

50. Of course it is.

Hi karl.

[Gore1FL]

55. He did Mary

n/t

[jdonaldball]

56. Wow, think of how much money their divorce lawyers would make!

[Selwynn]

57. Well, she should have one if she wants one!

:hi:

[Qanisqineq]

59. God needs a HUSBAND (eom)

:evilgrin:

[Liberal Mommy]

60. I thought God was a woman

Didn't you watch Dogma? ;)

[Bridget Burke]

62. God is Marianne Faithful

According to Absolutely Fabulous.

Doesn't she have an ex who's a man of style & taste?

[bleedingheart]

63. The Christian God is not exciting enough... now Zeus...

there was a ladies man...

;-)

[Dem2theMax]

64. That's totally up to God.

Just like everyone else. :)

Or in my case, a husband. I don't want one. I just wanna be me! :)

[mr blur]

65. I thought he had one...

Or is Pickles just a figment of my feverish European imagination?

[theHandpuppet]

66. Only if she wants one

But I wonder if she'll want a pre-nup. How would you divide up your share of omnipotence?