new spam: Eliminate your bills the Christian way!

[President Jesus]

copy:

Today millions of Americans have more than $10,000 debt...and it's getting worse. Our network of Christian debt professionals at Christian Debt Removers will help you combine your bills into one low monthly payment (minimum $5,000 debt please).

Let us help you live your life easier!

We use sound debt elimination principles to help you:

- Save up to 70% of your debt
- Reduce or entirely eliminate interest rates & late fees
- Eliminate creditor phone calls

Don't delay, we are ready to lighten your financial burden today!


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I actually hope those retards fall for this.

[fertilizeonarbusto]

1. Do "Christian debt professionals"

wash away debt with holy water? Or is the demon of debt cast from your body into the Gadarene swine?

[RebelYell]

5. Here you go

[wtmusic]

2. Go bankrupt the Christian Way

Technically, it's not screwing your creditors over as long as you pray your ass off and slip us a little on the side

[President Jesus]

4. especially since we know who the hook-nosed creditors are (wink wink)!

[fryguy]

3. by prayer?

Blessed be the Lord who provides manna from heaven to cover thy minimum payments and annual fees, and corrects my errant and wasteful spending habits....

[ktowntennesseedem]

6. Eliminate your guilt as you eliminate your debt!

If you just want to get out of debt, any service will do. But if God's mad at you for being in debt, now you can cleanse your soul and your wallet at the same time!

[trotsky]

7. Christians and debt financers have a LONG history of conflict.

Early church leaders felt it was sinful to charge interest for the loaning of money, whereas the Jews had no problem with it, and so borrowing Christians got in debt badly, and without an easy way out, simply decided to attack the Jews.

They also did this when the church went through a "everything in this world is bad" phase, and people refused to bathe or clean themselves. The Jews would have none of that, and so while they went around healthy and the Xians got sick, the wise Xians figured the Jews must have been in cahoots with Satan to poison them, and attacked them.