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Digit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-08-04 10:22 PM
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NEW! DU Humor Group! Go Lookie!
Someone please go there and post the story about the "moran" with the picture for our newbies.

Post your favorite funny stuff.
Geez, I need a good laugh.
Thanks!
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Wonk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-08-04 10:26 PM
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1. link
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Liberty Belle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Dec-08-04 10:45 PM
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2. New disease (Gonorrhea Lectim: "Gonna Re-Elect Him")& cure
Forwarded from my friend, Marita, with my reply:


The Centers for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new
virulent strain of sexually transmitted disease. This disease is
contracted through dangerous and high-risk behavior. The disease is
called Gonorrhea Lectim (pronounced "gonna re-elect him"). Many victims have contracted it after having been screwed for the past 4 years, in spite of having taken measures to protect themselves from this especially troublesome disease.

Cognitive sequellae of individuals infected with Gonorrhea Lectim
include, but are not limited to: anti-social personality disorder
traits; delusions of grandeur with a distinct messianic flavor; chronic mangling of the English language; extreme cognitive dissonance;inability to incorporate new information; pronounced xenophobia; inability to accept responsibility for actions; exceptional cowardice masked by acts of misplaced bravado; uncontrolled facial smirking; ignorance of geography and history; tendencies toward creating evangelical theocracies; and a strong propensity for categorical, all-or-nothing behavior.

The disease is sweeping Washington. Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed and baffled that this malignant disease originated only a few years ago in a Texas bush.

Marita--

Thanks for the "warning" about the insiduous Gonorrhea Lectim ("gonna
re-elect him") disease, which I'm forwarding to others (see CDC list of symptoms" below). I propose the following cures for this alarming
ailment:

1. Administration of Truth Serum to every member of the mainstream media, starting with all Fox News broadcasters

2. Mandatory screenings of the president, vice president, cabinet
officials and all GOP members of Congress to screen out those with signs of brain-wasting ailments, delusions of grandeur and "Grinch syndrome"--ie, hearts that are two sizes too small

3. Immediate vertebral implant surgery on all those spineless Democratic leaders "Zell Miller" Democrats in Congress

4. Major doses of sunshine in Congress to improve health of our nation by illuminating closed-door sessions

5. Quarantine and immediate destruction of all voting machines made by Diebold and other GOP-owned companies to prevent the spread of this infectious condition.

6. Mental health testing for all infected voters, especially right-wing fundamentalist followers, to get help for clinically certifiable members of the public. In-patient followup treatments of these brain-washed cult members shall include deprogramming sessions and viewing of educational videos aimed at opening eyes and ears to truth, opening minds to liberal viewpoints, and restoring our national sanity.

Miriam




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