If I was to get an online ordination, would it get me out of a draft?

[strategery blunder]

I know that the draft as it stands now would exempt seminary students, and the fundie wackjob administration is likely to keep this exemption intact. So I have a few questions...

1) Where can I go to get an online ordination as a minister?

2) If Bu$h* wants to draft me, could I just say "I'm an ordained minister, here's my documentation, see ya later?":evilgrin:

3) Would it help at all if I was to form my own church (now that might be a little over the top, but better than going to the Middle East)?

Ah, yes, evil thoughts have I:evilgrin:

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

1. I'm sure there are online ordinations

but I fear that this might not be enough to qualify you. You may wish to check out and see if there is, perhaps, an online theological course that will lead to ordination. Take it, pass the tests, and get the document. Register with your county clerk. THEN USE IT. Preside at regularly scheduled services (and this could be once a season, not necessarily once a week), officiate at or help with marriages and funerals. All these activities will give your certificate legitimacy.

I've been an ordained minister for 11 years (just for fyi, so you know I've been through this and am not just speculating).

[illflem]

3. During the Vietnam years

you could get ordained by sending in $3 and the form on a match book cover.

[sexybomber]

5. There are.

The Universal Life Church (Link!) will ordain you for free. They claim it's legal in all fifty states, but that the confirmation form you can print out doesn't supply the credentials. There's a package you can buy for like $25 that contains the "real" one.

I guess you could get ordained there...

[strategery blunder]

8. *bookmarks thread until I can figure out what's wrong with printer*

Thanks a lot!:) I don't have the $25 right now but I'm sure I can get it before the draft comes (I don't think it'll be until March at the earliest).

[Coyote_Bandit]

2. Become Quaker or Mennonite

I believe that will qualify you for conscientious objector status. Not exactly the same thing as an exemption - but maybe better than dodging bullets.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

4. Seventh Day Adventists

are another group that are pacifists.

[ArcRabbit]

6. Christians are suppose to be pacifists....

but I'm not sure bush heard this when he was in sunday school. Seems a lot of christians now a days were absent during those lessons as well.

Turn the other Cheek
Love Thy Neighbor
Thou Shalt Not Kill

Any of these ringing a bell Right Wing Christians?

[bullimiami]

7. it cost my son 5$

Universal Life Church. He proudly displays his ordination certificate. :)

[Mz Pip]

9. Re register as a Republican

Get a pimple on your butt. You'll never have to go anywhere.
Mz Pip
:dem:

[ragin_acadian]

12. or stay in the ROTC until the war is over like rumsfeld!

hell, i think he's the only one in the administration that "served" other than powell, and look at what happened to powell.

this would be a good newspaper ad:

"true patriots save themselves from getting killed in foreign lands; their hearts beat with true american reddish-blue blood, and they denounce evil do-ers with foam flecked mouths serviced by silver spoons. ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country by avoiding the current war and running for office to start the next one - here's how:

A. a bad knee deferment
B. multiple deferments/other priorities
C. go awol from guard unit flying obsolete aircraft with no chance of deployment
D. pilonaidal cyst
E. "blue collar" background that lets you stay in lawschool until the war is over
F. be a cheerleader like "mista' patreeyot" trent lott

anybody want to finish the rest of the ad? i say we start a DU sanctioned collection fund to advertise this message with administration names attached in major newspapers.

[Mz Pip]

13. Scoliosis

It can keep you from pounding sand in Eye-rack but won't keep you off the ski slopes of Squaw Valley.

(This is actually a real excuse a young Bushbot gave my son for not signing up and really supporting our President and the troops. However said Bushbot spends much time skiing and surfing. What a joke.)

Mz Pip
:dem:

[ragin_acadian]

15. yea, i wouldn't doubt it.

that seems like the typical attitude of a bush supporter:

"well, hmmmphh. but..but...i support the troops more than YOU do!"

sheeeyit.

i just got back from the jazz funeral for democracy in New Orleans, and the only bush supporter i saw there was a deranged hobo on a bike that threatened the crowd with a grenade - he was also typical of a bush supporter: taking advantage of government dole by laying about in government supported parks while simultaneously condemning the system, threatening defenseless people with might to make his point, and living the delusion that he was the only person on the planet with the only opinion that mattered.

we should all sign up to be on our local draft boards to send the delusioned and de-testicled middle and upper class republican kids to die for their beloved bush empire - it would be a form of darwinism, the strong and intelligent get on draft boards, the vacant and unintelligent spawn of the plutocrats succumb to a doom they voted for.

[Pikku]

10. Here's some info

http://www.nisbco.org/
http://www.objector.org/

Nothing is automatic in granting CO status. Religion, or nonreligion, won't automatically qualify or disqualify anyone. What is important is proof that your beliefs have been thoroughly considered.

You would do well to start a journal now, where you record your experiences at protests, reaction to readings (religious or political), remarks on current events, etc. Get pictures of yourself at protests, or doing volunteer work. Document your participation in anti-war groups (Move On, DU, and other online groups could qualify).Get letters from people who know your views on war and pacifism. (The people don't have to agree with you. They just have to know what you believe, and record it in the letter.) You can register your CO status beforehand with organizations like nisbco, above, or with your church.

It is important that you start documenting BEFORE the draft begins. Get lettters notarized, or mail them to yourself without an envelope, so that the cancellation stamp (with date) is on the document itself. You want to show that your beliefs predate your being drafted, if possible. This worksheet on war objection http://www.nisbco.org/co_worksheet.htm can help you think about the issues the draft board will probably want to discuss, if and when the draft is ever reinstated.

[China_cat]

11. Get ordained and

they'll just draft you and send you to a war zone without armor or a gun in order to give 'spiritual comfort' to the fighting troops. You'll be ok without protection, though...you've got god.

[DS1]

14. Get ordained here

www.ulc.org

and welcome aboard,

DS1, Minister