A scary conversation with a friend.

[opiate69]

A few nights ago, I ran into an old friend who I hadn't seen in a few years. Let's call him "W". We have a mutual friend, "F", who had spent 8 years in the Army as an Airborne Ranger in the 80's. After Sept 11, both "W" and "F" joined the National Guard, although W made sure to join Officer Candidate School so he would effectively be undeployable... but I digress.. F is currently in Iraq, and has been for almost a year now... he is a pretty big and intimidating looking guy.. so, W was telling me about the last email he received from F.. seems F's unit was called upon to do a door-to-door sweep through some neighborhood, and at one of the houses, F kicked in the front door and (in W's words)"this chick was standing there with an AK-47... she took one look at F and dropped her gun and ran into the kitchen.. LOL... I don't know why F didn't just shoot her in the back, though"..I'm afraid that when my dear old friend (and former bassist) comes back from Iraq (should he survive), I'm not going to know him.

[mahina]

1. And he is going to need to stay connected with friends.

Please excuse me if this is not welcomed, but as a family member of a PTSD'd Vietnam Vet (now passed) I can tell you that three things you can do will help a lot,
1 don't judge
2 stay connected, even if he makes it hard. Make it impossible for him to shut his friends out and isolate.
3 Help him find other outlets than drugs and alcohol

Sermon over. I'm just saying.

[opiate69]

3. Here's the thing, though..

It's kinda hard to explain, but this guy was raised by a career officer/VietNam vet.. joined the Rangers when he was 18, studies military history/theory religiously, was involved in some kind of ops in Panama... and to be perfectly honest, he is "in his element", so to speak.. I really don't think he's a candidate for PTSD... it's just so twisted.

[mahina]

4. Excuse me but you might check your assumptions.

He's got about a 30% chance, 70% he'll be fine. It has nothing to do with how tough you are, how strong you are, how gung ho you are, none of it.

Speaking as the daughter of a Special Forces dai wi who loved the army.
Till he quit ONE WEEK before he would have made 20 years, and without major family cooperation would have been homeless for the last 6 years of his life.

He was my hero and I don't know you from Adam but I hope you stay in touch with your friend and try not to judge him.

[opiate69]

5. Oh, I totally intend to stay in touch..

I'm just concerned because he seems to finally, after 40-some-odd years, found his "calling" and, it may sound crazy, but I think he'll miss being able to continue being the warrior he has become... plus, I know that his political ideologies have shifted to the right since 9-11.. in any case, I'll be there for him, however he needs me to be.

[mahina]

6. No doubt...

In Dad's words, "putting down the hand grenade and picking up the calculator" didn't quite work out. Plus for some odd reason civilian colleagues did not respond well to rage.
Good luck to all. F bush for cutting VA funding, for which he will go to hell if there is one.

[MADem]

2. If he has been there for a year, poor guy,

...he probably knew enough to realize from the way the woman handled the weapon that it was the "family gun." Most people in that end of the world have a gun in the house, and we aren't talking a little gun, either. It's used for intimidation, for manly pride, for shooting off at weddings and eid, for hunting or for scaring off "varmints" in herding and farming communities (more common in rural areas). You can buy them cheap in the bazaar. Even though you pay some clown to wander around the neighborhood as a "guard," (a very common practice, it's really extortion) your house can still get robbed if you don't take very active measures to secure your assets. Locks, high walls with cut glass on the top, huge gates, and so on....waving the gun around on occasion makes anyone thinking about ripping you off think twice.

Hope your friend makes it back. It is an awful thing, this absurd war.