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CatWoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:34 AM
Original message
The View and Breast feeding in Public
What's this about the ladies of The View condemming breast feeding in public?

I caught the tail end of Morning Sedition.

A guest was on (sorry, didn't catch her name) who said Star Jones and Barbara Walters were coming down on women who breast feed in public.

Is that a kicker or what?

A show geared toward women kicking women in the teeth.
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trotsky Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:36 AM
Response to Original message
1. Misogyny not limited to men.
Many women have been conditioned to be ashamed of one of their most beautiful bodily functions.
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Mizmoon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:47 AM
Response to Reply #1
6. I've even heard women defending "female circumcision"
hell, I bet there is even some idiot woman out there defending lower pay for women doing the same job as a man.
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trotsky Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:48 AM
Response to Reply #6
7. It's a "market incentive"
to encourage women to stay at home and be mothers like Gawd intended. :sarcasm:
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:09 AM
Response to Reply #6
14. Hey, there are even women
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Mizmoon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:12 AM
Response to Reply #14
17. I read that - I think she didn't know
which amendment she was referring to. What a dumbass.
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Stinky The Clown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:58 PM
Response to Reply #14
109. There are women IN office who don't think they should vote
As linked in this thread:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=104x3797264


Kay O'Connor (Kansas Senate Republican)

"I'm an old-fashioned woman. Men should take care of women, and if men were taking care of women today, we wouldn't have to vote."
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Arkana Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 08:57 PM
Response to Reply #6
202. Yes, and her name is Ann "The Mann" Coulter
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:11 AM
Response to Reply #1
16. How disgustingly and unfortunately true.
Neither is stupidity or the belief that your own sick, anti-woman and anti-child views should be written into laws and inflicted on the public at large.
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Spinzonner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:36 AM
Response to Original message
2. I don't understand why it's necessary to feed breasts in public

Oh.

Nevermind.
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Triana Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:41 AM
Response to Original message
3. I saw a woman do that this weekend.
It was very discreet. Nothing 'showed', it wasn't as if she was doing anything at all obscene. I don't see what the big friggin deal is.

People need to find something important to worry about. Like poverty.
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zalinda Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:49 AM
Response to Reply #3
8. It's because the breast has become more of a sex toy
than a functioning body part. Before the advent of formula, moms breastfed their babies in "public". They were discreet about it but no one thought anything of it. There are woman, though, who are very challenging about the activity, and will not be discreet. If a place to sit in the restroom was available, I think more women would choose to use that, than a public area.

zalinda
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Debbi801 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:00 AM
Response to Reply #8
11. Would you want to eat your lunch in a rest room?
Rest rooms are dirty. When I was nursing my children in public, that was the last place I would want to feed them.

I agree that women should be discreet, but chairs in rest rooms are not the answer. If I was at a mall, I always looked for a bench in a more out of the way place, so that my older kids could burn off energy while I was nursing. It would be great if more shopping centers offered "mothers' lounges" for an option. But, it should only be that, an option.

Debbi
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:09 AM
Response to Reply #8
25. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
CatWoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:38 AM
Response to Reply #25
27. I can't believe you said that
How the fuck can you compare peeing to breastfeeding?
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Arugula Latte Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:27 AM
Response to Reply #25
44. A mother has to FEED HER CHILD.
Jesus Christ, how fucking FUCKED UP has this country become when people object to women doing the most basic act nature ever intended, providing nutrition to her baby to keep it alive.

I am astounded at these attitudes.
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:49 PM
Response to Reply #25
87. That is the most digusting, sexist comment I have ever read on DU.
There's nothing offensive about a woman feeding her child, even if it is in public and even if that food comes from her breast. If men hadn't sexualized the breast as an object that existed only to titilate them, while simultaneously hypocritically stigmatizing and repressing female sexuality in the media and society for centuries, no one would have an objection to public breast feeding. Maybe all the people out there insulting women for giving their children nutrition and healthy immune systems, when their infants need that food, should THINK ABOUT THE FACT THAT THEY MAY HAVE BEEN BREAST FED BY THEIR OWN MOTHERS. I DARE THOSE IRRATIONAL, MISOGYNIST JERKS TO CALL UP THEIR OWN MOTHERS, ASK IF THEY BREAST FED THEM AND THEN TELL THEM THEY SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF HAVING DONE THAT. There's no difference between doing that and criticizing women for feeding in public, or equating it with bans on men pissing on public property or other obscenity, which FEEDING, NURTURING and CARING for an infant simply isn't comparable with.

Your post represents a gross misunderstanding of so many issues vital to functioning as a responsible, civilized human being that I am truly distrubed.
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CatWoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:55 PM
Response to Reply #87
88. I read once that the high mortality rate among European royalty
during medieval times was due to the fact that Queens were forbidden to breast feed their children.

A mother's milk contains vitamins and nutrients that stave off infection and illness.
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:12 PM
Response to Reply #88
93. Breast milk is essential for the health of the developing infant
Edited on Mon Jun-06-05 01:13 PM by BlueIris
in about fifty different ways. Obviously, you and other educated, caring, intelligent, sensitive and non-sexist people posting on this website know that, but many others INCLUDING THE HOSTS OF THE FUCKING "VIEW" still don't. Or don't think mothers nurturing their babies are as important as how yucky it is that women might need to give that nutrition to their kids when they need it, even if the women are shopping or trying to work when said kids are hungry, even if that happens to be in plain site of other people who have been brainwashed by the misogynist tide of crazy bastards currently controlling way too much in our sick country. Maybe Starr Jones and assholes who agree with her should consider LEAVING the room or area if they can't handle the shadow of someone's breast under a blanket or something BEFORE they start dolling out nutbar criticisms they have no right to express. What bizarre, judgmental morons.
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King Coal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:59 PM
Response to Reply #88
111. There's that. Plus they all married their cousins.
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CatWoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:52 PM
Response to Reply #111
129. you had to go there, didn't ya!!!
:hi:
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King Coal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 07:00 AM
Response to Reply #129
173. Yeah, blue, blue, blue, blue blood and all that.
:hi:
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:37 PM
Response to Reply #87
98. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:16 PM
Response to Reply #87
123. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
shanti Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:13 PM
Response to Reply #87
134. as a mother
Edited on Mon Jun-06-05 03:31 PM by shanti
who breast fed all four of my sons, i say YEAH WHAT YOU SAID!! there should be NO argument on this! the breast is the best, and everything else runs a distant second. if you can't nurse, that's what you get. sorry! :shrug:
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Triana Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:43 PM
Response to Reply #87
137. (s)he probably reads...
'askmen.com' - sounds like some of what i've read there...

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donsu Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:58 AM
Response to Reply #8
54. you have a point - in america the breast is a sexual object not a

giver of life.
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bloom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:30 PM
Response to Reply #8
162. Seems like it might also have something to do with
people who don't want women to feel "FREE" to do what is natural.


(Who knows where that could lead? :shrug: )
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:13 AM
Response to Reply #3
18. I see women breastfeed in public all the time. Nothing wrong with
it, God knows. People who care, or God forbid, object, need to GET LIVES. And then worry about their own fucked-up image of women and/or themselves.
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Tomee450 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:57 PM
Response to Reply #3
130. I don't understand the fuss,either.
When I was growing up, I used to see women breastfeeding their babies in church. They would just cover the breast with a handkerchief or scarf. No one paid them any attention.
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wakeme2008 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:42 AM
Response to Original message
4. If you are not at work and probably better if you have hi-speed Net
You got to see,,, Woman doing Handstand


http://www.big-boys.com/articles/upsidedown.html


:)


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kenny blankenship Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:27 AM
Response to Reply #4
45. Surprised the kid didn't try the coin return to see
if it could pick up some loose change in addition to snagging a free drink.
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wakeme2008 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:26 PM
Response to Reply #45
94. I loved his confused face
as he was drinking and looking up to where normally his mother's face is.....

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Stinky The Clown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:05 PM
Response to Reply #94
118. That's **exactly** what hit me, too.
The little guy looked all confuddled there for a second!

Very funny video!
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countryjake Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:51 PM
Response to Reply #4
105. That is one precious video!
So cute that he KNEW it didn't feel right and was trying to get into position anyway!
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Debbi801 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 07:59 PM
Response to Reply #4
160. Ok, that was hysterical...
The baby's expression was priceless.
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Ilsa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:46 AM
Response to Original message
5. The best milk is the freshest...
coming straight from the breast, nothing lost through chilling in refrigerators or freezing, nothing added by plastic containers, perfect temperature, no risk of bacterial contamination.

People need to get over this false modesty. Some of those grand dames on The View have shown more of their breasts in public than a nursing mother would.
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dweller Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:53 AM
Response to Original message
9. Breaking...Baby responds to The View.....



dp
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:15 AM
Response to Reply #9
19. Oh. My. God. That is hysterical.
Edited on Mon Jun-06-05 09:24 AM by BlueIris
I am totally wetting myself with laughter right now.
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Sparkle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:43 AM
Response to Reply #9
22. LOL!
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burythehatchet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:47 AM
Response to Reply #9
32. I agree with Star and Baba
If I ever saw either of those two women with their breat exposed in public, it truly would be gross and disguisting. All other mommies, go for it. It the best start you can give your baby and your baby wants to eat when she is ready!



Gross......Disguisting
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SpaceCatMeetsMars Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:03 PM
Response to Reply #32
57. What's offensive was Starr inflicting her godawful commercialized
wedding(TM) on the American public. I don't even watch TV anymore and somehow I kept hearing about that farce of a wedding.

I read an article in Vanity Fair about the fancy celebrity nightclubs where they only allow the celebrities and rich people in -- and she and the fiance were described as making a horrible spectacle of themselves simulating a sex act on a big bed that the club had for people to sit on. She sure has a nerve to complain about breastfeeding.
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Tomee450 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:08 PM
Response to Reply #57
133. Star Jones has
become so obnoxious. Since she has gotten the big head, I can't stand her.
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DanCa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:58 AM
Response to Original message
10. I keep thinking about married the married with children epidode
Where all Al launches a counter protest of over weight beer belly no'mamer's when women started breast feeding in thier store. My opinion is on this is I am pro privacy I try to respect other peoples rights and walk away. However I noticed that more and more often that my right to privacy is shrinking and that I am the one who is being required to make concessions for other people. Just a little food for thought and levitivity at the same time. :)
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:32 AM
Response to Reply #10
21. I don't understand your post.
Are breastfeeding women shrinking your right to privacy? :shrug:
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CatWoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:47 AM
Response to Reply #10
23. LOL
That was a funny episode

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King Coal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:56 PM
Response to Reply #23
108. So, let's say that it becomes acceptable to do in public, just for the
sake of argument.

What would a wet-nurse run you for an afternoon of cookies? Larry Reeb was right.
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Kazak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:02 AM
Response to Original message
12. People need to get over this hangup...
and the formula lobby needs to back the fuck off. This ain't fun and games. Breast is best. It's only the health of our children we're talking about. Gah! :grr:
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Lerkfish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:02 AM
Response to Reply #12
38. just to stick my nose in here...
I fully support breast feeding and breast feeding in public.
but I think breast feeding adherents can be a little over the top sometimes. When my wife was unable to breast feed (she tried and tried but could not), the hospital lactation counselor tried to make her feel like less than a woman because of her difficulties. Since she'd just given birth, I found that irresponsible and uncalled for.
We wrote a letter to the hospital complaining about it. Their response was for this same woman (whom we nicknamed the "lactation nazi" after the "soup nazi" on seinfeld) to call us at our home and berate us AGAIN for having the gall to complain about her. That was the only response we received.
There was another counselor who was just fine, but that one was very militant about breast feeding and very unsympathetic to any woman experiencing problems.

to make a long story short, we had to formula feed, but our son turned out just as healthy, if not healthier than breast-fed babies, so all that guilt-tripping was for nothing.

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Carni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:05 PM
Response to Reply #38
60. I had similar run-ins with lactation Nazi types as did friends of mine
I was very turned off by the whole experience. You do the best you can and not everyone is a dyed in the wool "perfect mom" from the word go.

I don't care who, feeds who, where, if it's done in a polite manner but I have to admit the rude "what kind of a mother are you" types really soured me on the whole breast feeding issue.

Now when I see someone breast feeding I think of all the rude nasty remarks I had to endure because I bottle fed my kid...and I find that I cop kind of an involuntary attitude.

Maybe that is where some of the public resentment stems from because I know a lot of women who went through the same crap with hospitals staff etc.

But aside from all that who gives a damn what those idiots on the view think!
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Lerkfish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:10 PM
Response to Reply #60
62. actually, bottle feeding was a wonderful miracle for ME...
we got to split responsibility for bottle feedings. I got to hold my son in my arms and give him his bottle in the middle of the night or whenever.

*I* got to bond with him, as well as my wife did. I wouldn't have traded that for any amount of money.

If we had been able to breastfeed, I'd have missed that, and not known what I was missing.

:)
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Dora Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:22 PM
Response to Reply #62
78. FWIW...
I think it's wonderful that you were able to share feedings with your wife. However, breast feeding does not necessarily exclude the father from feedings.

Our son is four-months old now, and our babysitter and my husband give him bottles of my expressed breast milk - three 4 oz. bottles a day before I get home from the office.
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Lerkfish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:30 PM
Response to Reply #78
84. right
thanks for pointing that out.

:toast:
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:59 PM
Response to Reply #78
113. It's patently obvious that dads can bottle feed breast milk as easily as
formula.

The defensiveness around this issue is really interesting.
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gollygee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-08-05 10:02 AM
Response to Reply #62
209. You can bond without feeding your baby
my husband is very bonded with our daughter.
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:33 PM
Response to Reply #60
85. "Perfect mom"? What is that about?
Babies are supposed to get milk from their mother's breasts.

If you can't hack it, fine... but to act as if not doing so makes you less than perfect is ridiculous... it's a choice. It's a free country and nobody can force you to do what's best for the baby.

But please don't get defensive and pretend that it's "just as good". It's not.
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Carni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:07 PM
Response to Reply #85
91. Oh my!
Bottlefeeders "can't hack it" -- "nobody can force you to do what's best for your baby" in a pissy tone etc.

Thanks you proved my point.
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:37 PM
Response to Reply #91
99. Yes, I shouldn't have followed your "perfect mom" lead, but I did.
Oh, my, indeed.

:eyes:
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Carni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:54 PM
Response to Reply #99
106. Well *moms* like you ARE perfect aren't they?
At least that was the general impression I always felt I was supposed to get, whenever I talked to someone so *interested* in how other people's children are being raised.

I am so happy that the left has it's ethics, decency and health police just like the right does.
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:58 PM
Response to Reply #106
110. No. Who said that?
No one did. It's called a strawman.

I understand that you might feel a little guilt for not doing what's best for the child, for whatever reason. It's natural.

But don't vent that guilt as anger at others.

Don't expect anyone to buy the "formula is just as good" line, either. It's just not.

I'm interested in childrens' health. Not just yours. Sue me.

For you to characterize anyone questioning your use of the term "perfect mom" as the "ethics dececy and health police" is frickin ridiculous.
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:04 PM
Response to Reply #110
117. Actually, I bottle fed both of my kids, and I don't feel one iota of
guilt.

What I don't understand is how this issue has become so divisive among women. Breast feed, or don't. It's your choice. Healthy kids are being raised either way, so what's the big deal? :shrug:
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:06 PM
Response to Reply #117
119. The big deal appears to be
that if you don't suck up and say bottle feeding is just as good, that you're a "nazi" or you think you're a "perfect mom".

:eyes:
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:12 PM
Response to Reply #119
121. I guess I would call it a matter of individual choice, and not make
a value judgement on it, either way.
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Carni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 07:08 PM
Response to Reply #117
155. I don't get it either
But the Queen there apparently felt the need to rip me a new ass because I pointed out that some breast feeding enthusiasts are a pain in the ass.

As far as I am concerned it's none of anyones biz who breast feeds and who doesn't...the main thing is that they are being fed and cared for by well intentioned parents.
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Dorian Gray Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:53 PM
Response to Reply #110
143. Though what you say is true
it's also said in a tone that reads as superior.

I will breast feed my babies if I can. I agree that there are many benefits to doing so. But, when I have people telling me that those who can not do so only can't because they don't "want it" enough, I get angry. And, sadly, that's been said to friends of mine who are pregnant, stressed out about having to go back to work in three month, and nervous about motherhood.

Using formula is not a death sentence on a child. Sometimes it's necessary. Sometimes children do not take to the breast. Sometimes it's an option that works best for both parents.

I think that people get really judgemental about this topic, and it both saddens me and amuses me. Everybody thinks that what they do is the best way to do things. Fine. But, why should mothers make other mothers feel bad about the way that they choose to mother. It's not like we're feeding our children Coke in a bottle!
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Carni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 07:18 PM
Response to Reply #143
156. It saddens AND ANNOYS ME
My point was about "not being the perfect mother" is that when you have a child there are always people coming out of the woodwork to tell you what you are doing wrong (often times they are strangers)

It is not helpful to harp at new mothers -- they have enough on their plate without some bossy brown telling them what they should and shouldn't do.

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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:34 AM
Response to Reply #156
179. I'm sorry it bothers you so much...
it won't stop, though. It's just instinct. New moms have to be prepared to deal with it. The only alternative is to hide in a cave.

The unwanted advice you got was certainly not limited to bottle feeding, this I know. Did these bad feelings remain about any other kind of advice?
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:27 AM
Response to Reply #143
175. The tone you detect
Edited on Tue Jun-07-05 10:29 AM by redqueen
is in response to her characterization of people who realize how much more the mother's colostrum and milk do for the infant. It's not superior... it's offended.

I'm sure there are some nurses who are grouchy and bossy. That's not, however, restricted only to lactation consultants.

Put it in perspective... would you expect to hear anyone refer to physical therapists as "exercize nazi types"? No, but those people are just as pushy, because it's their job to be pushy.

It seems many in this country don't want to wake up to the fact that formula is just nowhere near as good as breastmilk. It's just not. For those professionals whose job it is to see that the baby gets the best start, pushing the mom to try harder to breastfeed is THEIR JOB. Sure there are probably some that are over the top... but there are those types of people in EVERY ARENA. To see this kind of trash talk reserved for this group irritates me to no end.

Another thing that set me off is her insinuation that only a "dyed in the wool 'perfect mom'" is able to nurse her infant. That's pure flamebait.

And the comment that a few rude women "soured her on the breast feeding issue" is just sad. It's not an ISSUE... it's how babies are meant to be fed for the first 2 years of their life! ALL of us should recognize how much better breast milk is for babies, regardless of what we choose to feed our infants. Anything else is living in denial.

The admitted 'involuntary' attitude was just more bait...

and the insinuation that it's because of a FEW RUDE WOMEN that the WHOLE SOCIETY has this attitude of 'resentment' toward breastfeeding... well that was the spark that lit the fuse.


Unfrickinbelievable.
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Dorian Gray Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 12:25 PM
Response to Reply #175
193. That's all well and good...
I don't care about this argument, though. It's the same thing between working and non-working mothers. People always believe that their way is superior and often make those who choose a different way feel badly about their choices.

I'm particularly congnizant of this situation because I had a friend visiting who scared the bejeesus out of another friend who was due to give birth in two weeks. (Which she did this morning!) She told her, in no uncertain terms, that mothers who didn't breast feed were lazy. That mothers who went back to work cared little about their children. That mothers who chose to ween their children before they were ready to ween themselves caused trauma for their children.

You may agree with all this. That's your righ. Hell, I might choose to mother that way when it is my time. However, I will not tell any of my friends, whom I love and who have very different temperatments than myself, that they SHOULD mother in the way that I would choose to mother.

It alienates people. You are obviously a huge proponant of breast feeding. The education is good. People should know that it's better for their children. I just hate that those who are unable to do so feel guilty about it. (I have friends who have adopted children who get uncomfortable with this conversation because they obviously couldn't breast feed. Even they feel guilty about it! Particularly those who were unable to conceive themselves!)

I just think that women are prone to guilt about their bodies foibles. They are too fat. Too thin. Not pretty enough. Etc. Imagine the horrific guilt that some may feel when their bodies do not produce the biological effects that society tells them it must in order to be a good mother?

Or worse? Because they choose not to breast feed for their own reasons, they are made to feel like lesser mothers? It angers me.

Now, having said all that, I agree that Breast Feeding is the BETTER thing to do. I will choose to breast feed. I will also try and try again because it's what I want to do. (For the health benefits, the cost benefits, AND the bonding benefits.) I know they all exist. But, when one of my best friends is stressed as hell because she went through an in-vitro experience, she is nervous that her body won't be able to produce milk, and another friend tells her "Oh, of course you will! You have to keep trying! I think that people who claim that they can't breast feed are full of it, anyhow," I get angry! It's an unfair guilt trip laid at the feet of a nervous new mother.

(And I'm proud to say that my friend gave birth this morning to a beautiful baby boy! I don't yet know the status on the breast feeding!)

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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 12:35 PM
Response to Reply #193
195. Congrats to your friend!
Again, a few rude people does not warrant trashing proponents of breastfeeding en masse. We all know rude people, of every stripe... I hope we don't turn our backs on the good information those people share out of spite, though. You know what they say about spite and faces...

Also, you can't really compare what you feed your infant for the first years of their life with working, can you? For one thing, breastmilk being much much better for babies is not a matter of opinion. For another thing, most mothers don't always have the option of staying home. Most mothers do have the option of nursing.
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Dorian Gray Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 12:49 PM
Response to Reply #195
196. You are right
I just see it all the time. Even two of my friends (who are sisters-in-law) bitch and moan to me about each other, though. One breast feeds, the other doesn't. They both think that their way is superior, and I don't really care either way. Their child/their choice.

See, my point is not to argue that one is superior to the other. I just hate seeing women tear each other down about something like this. That's all.

And I'm sure my friend is ecstatic. (And hopefully sleeping! After an all nighter, they gave her a C-Section!) But the baby is healthy. Over ten lbs. They had a rough time of getting pregnant. (They tried for years. The problem was his, and he had corrective surgery. But none of it worked until they went through the painful and nerve wracking process of in-vitro.) But, that's another topic!

:)

I don't mean to be confrontational about this topic. It's the last thing I want to do.
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Lerkfish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-08-05 10:07 AM
Response to Reply #175
210. ahem...I'd like to clarify your mischaracterization of my post.
I did not say all breastfeeding proponents were "nazis" only that one we had to deal with. If you'll note, I said the other one was nice, but still didn't address the problem.
the difficulty was that the nazi was in charge of the dept. She was brought in when the first counselor couldn't resolve the problem and asked for her help.

And, you should also note I stated I completely supported breastfeeding. It just didn't work out for us, unfortunately, as it DOESNT FOR MANY.

I am only lamenting there had to be, at that particularly vulnerable moment, an extreme negative value judgement made of my wife by this woman for something so clearly out of her control.

unfortunately, the "tone" of that counselor was condescending, insulting and insensitive to my wife. And I witnessed it and had to help her cope with it. For that reason, I have no problem accurately portraying what occurred in my experience.
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Dora Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 09:27 AM
Response to Reply #110
174. I'll back you up, queen
My babe is four months old now and breastfeeding. And I say to every bottle feeding mother: I know from experience that breastfeeding is not easy. Period. It's exhausting, it's frustrating, it's boring and lonely and sometimes painful (ouch!) and sometimes it has a load of resentment. Sometimes, it's beautiful and ecstatic. I avow that every second of bliss, every second of boredom, every moment of the act of breastfeeding is worth it.

I chose breastfeeding not because it's fun, because it's not; neither did I choose it because it's liberating, because it's not. It is the most demanding physical work I've ever done. Being on call for nursing 24/7 required me to submit myself to fulfilling my newborn's needs without question and without regard for my own wants. Going back to work when he was only seven weeks old was heartbreaking and not a choice I made willingly, and I have the humiliation of twice wearing the milking machine each day, all so he can continue to breastfeed. So why did I choose it? A) It's free, and we're poor. B) It's the best for ensuring my son's health, in both the short and long term.

To anyone who says right off the bat after a day or two or three of trying to breastfeed, "it's not working," I gently say you haven't tried long enough, or hard enough, or been patient enough with yourself and your baby. Try again. Try some more. And when you're tired of trying, then take a big breath, give up your resistance, and try it again. If you think you're doing something wrong, or if you think the baby cannot latch, or if you're worried about your milk supply, or whatever your fear is, I promise you that there is help out there and there are women who want to help you and your baby. Call La Leche for help. Call your baby's pediatrician. Call a hospital's maternity dept. Read a book on the subject. Search the internet for answers. Stop feeling sorry for yourself because your nipples are sore or because the baby just ate 90 minutes ago and he's hungry again. Newborns need to nurse 10-12 times a day, and self-pity isn't going to put food in his tiny little belly.

Trust your body and your love for your child. There is nothing more important that you should be doing right now. The television can wait. The laundry can wait. The piles of clutter can wait. Sit down, take a breath, and give your breast to your baby with love.
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:37 AM
Response to Reply #174
180. I'm no professional so I don't know...
maybe there are some reasons it's just impossible for some people.

IIRC, the lactation consultant that worked with me did say that most people give up because it's hard, not because it's impossible. I had a lot of trouble nursing my first - a month premature so she didn't know how to suck. But there were training methods and after a couple of weeks of using the bottle to feed her expressed milk, she did great. We were worried she might not take my nipple after having had a plastic one, but there was no problem and she switched back and forth regularly after I went back to work.
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Dora Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 11:43 AM
Response to Reply #180
190. Maybe there are some reasons it's impossible
And lack of commitment is one of them, IMHO.

A friend of ours has two daughters. When the first one was born, she took to nursing without any difficulty and my friend was able to breastfeed for 18 months. When the second girl was born, latching was difficult and nursing was painful - my friend finally found out from her pediatrician that there was a slight palate defect. She met with a lactation consultant who was able to help her with adjusting positions. That daughter nursed for seven months, and I think was switched to formula after that.

My point is that this friend of ours never gave up her commitment to giving her girls the best. And when she told me about the problems with her youngest, her eyes still rolled in recalling the difficulty and the pain she experienced, and her daughter's frustration and hunger and tears.

I applaud your commitment!

People are too easily swayed into thinking that if a solution(formula) can be bought, it must be the better answer to the problem (the burden of nursing).

Easier is not always better. It's true for the food we eat, and it's true for the food we feed our babies.
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Debbi801 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:56 AM
Response to Reply #174
184. Awesome Post!
Edited on Tue Jun-07-05 10:56 AM by Debbi801
It is hard. It is one of the More difficult, time consuming jobs that I have done. But, the benefits have been huge.

It hurt at the beginning until we got our positions right. Being engorged hurt. But those little trusting adoring eyes looking up at me made it worth while. Pumping was awful, and I didn't have my son there to offer encouragement. Spending all of my breaks at work pumping was challenging, but I managed to do it. Spending my lunch hour every day visiting him so that I could nurse in person was a pain, but I did it.

To me, it has been worth every moment spent doing it. And, looking back, if I had the last 3 years to do over, I wouldn't change a thing.

But, you have to go into it knowing it is going to be hard and being willing to put forth the time and effort to succeed.

Debbi
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Dora Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 11:13 AM
Response to Reply #184
189. Thanks
And I lift my left breast in a toast to all nursing moms! ;-)
:toast:
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SarahB Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:55 PM
Response to Reply #85
167. To back you up- 101 REASONS TO BREASTFEED!
These are the MEDICAL facts:
http://www.promom.org/101/

No, bottle feeding in most cases (barring medical reasons) is not as healthy and it puts babies at greater risk. It is terrible? No? Does it make someone less of a mother? No. Is a realist part of our society that most women work and most employers could give a shit if they have pump breaks? Yes.

Anyway, I get what you're saying. :)
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:39 AM
Response to Reply #167
181. Pump breaks at work are fun.
:sarcasm:
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Debbi801 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:59 AM
Response to Reply #181
186. LOL. Especially when you get walked in on...
Even after signing out the conference room. Even after putting a note on the outside of the door.

Talk about humiliation. I still have a hard time looking some of those guys in the face.

Then you have the boss who finds it perfectly acceptable for employees to take multiple 10-15 minutes smoke breaks through-out the day but can't understand taking a pumping break until HR gets involved.

Debbi
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 11:10 AM
Response to Reply #186
188. Lucky for me I got an empty office to use.
No lock on the door, but everyone knew who was in there and why.

:blush:

And my boss was cool with it... even let me take longer lunches to drive home and feed her and drop off what I'd pumped that morning.
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misanthrope Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 08:43 PM
Response to Reply #186
200. What's the difference...
...between them seeing your breast then and seeing your breast in a restaurant with a child attached to it?
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Debbi801 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-08-05 07:02 AM
Response to Reply #200
205. For one, when my son is attached, you cannot see my breast...
But with pumping, you can. For another, while I had no problems pumping for my child, it is not a wonderful maternal episode. It is uncomfortable and very unattractive. Both breasts are exposed and you've got hard plastic cones attached to them. There is no modesty.
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Dorian Gray Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 12:28 PM
Response to Reply #181
194. That... is funny....
Many companies here in New York City have breast pumping rooms. Sadly, they are usually taken with men taking naps because they had a late night the night before.

That is a problem. I'm lucky that I work from home, so none of that will be an issue for me.
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:16 PM
Response to Reply #38
70. The Nipple Nazis are a bit much, aren't they?
I bottle-fed both of my kids, for reasons that were my own, and I'll apologize to no one for it.

But, I think women should breast feed wherever they need to, provided they are discreet, and nearly every nursing mother is discreet. Anyone who has a problem with breastfeeding in public is an ass.
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JerseygirlCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-08-05 07:17 AM
Response to Reply #38
206. Well, you were treated terribly and she did a lousy job
no doubt about that.

Breast is best -- for mom and baby. But I understand that it's not always possible for every mom. There's no reason your wife should have been made to feel badly about herself. She tried. Sounds like she had a lousy teacher, too. Someone better and more sympathetic might have been more helpful -- who knows?

Your son is fine, as you said. I'm sorry for that crummy experience -- never should have happened.
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Lerkfish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-08-05 09:56 AM
Response to Reply #206
208. thanks..it WAS horrible...
our newborn son was not getting enough, no matter what my wife did. even a breast pump could not get hardly any milk out, even though it definitely was in there. he cried and cried. The lactation counselor just claimed she wasn't "trying hard enough" and other really counterproductive things. when we got him home, and finally gave up trying, it was obvious to us he wasn't getting nourishment, I ran out in a blizzard and got some formula.
IMMEDIATELY after the formula, he was sated and happy and fell right asleep.

the counselor didn't do here job, because there must have been some physiological reason the milk was not flowing, but because of her attitude, she never investigated or offered solutions other than to "keep trying". Well, that didn't help.

It was made much worse because right after childbirth, emotions and hormones are at a peak, and to imply it was her fault, was just awful because she took that to heart and thought she was starving our son due to being less of a woman.

All that really needed to happen was for the counselor to recognize it wasn't working and suggest an alternative or...GOD FORBID...give us a bottle of formula and see if that worked.

Since the counselor just breezed in for a few minutes, she did not know what my wife had been doing over the course of 2 days to try to get him to feed.
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JerseygirlCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-08-05 11:02 AM
Response to Reply #208
212. That really sucks
I had no problem with my first, but plenty with my second. Fortunately, I also had an understanding consultant. He got some formula at first -- I was too tired and stressed to make enough milk. So what? I had to finger feed him for a month and feed him with a syringe, but eventually the stinker agreed to nurse, lol! Point is, in there, formula was had. Pumping alone just doesn't get the production started -- not enough, anyway, for me.

If I'd had no support, and lots of negative stuff thrown at me, I'd probably have done as you two did. There's way too much upheaval and just plain hormonal nasties going on right then to add to the stress. Besides, the poor kid picks up on all that stress, too.

Someone more relaxed, interested and understanding may have made the difference for you. Too bad the person you had was none of those things. I'm glad you found the answer for you, though.
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Shallah Kali Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:03 AM
Response to Original message
13. I oppose women making boobs of themselves in public
People like this need to get over their personal prejudices and body phobias. It is especially stupid coming from women like these who are in an industry that is a glorification of the sliconed botoxed wonder bra-ed surgically perfected female. America would be a healthier place if we didn't need to be operated upon to meet the media standard of physical beauty to feel adequate as a human beings. Our kids would be healthier if breastfeeding was socially acceptable instead of treated like a perversion if done in public.
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:11 AM
Response to Original message
15. BACK IN THE HOUSE!
You don't need to be out in public if you are going to need to do that! Why it is offensive to even be out when you are pregnant, people will know what you have been up to. Get back in the house and stay there.

:sarcasm:
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proud2BlibKansan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 07:21 PM
Response to Reply #15
157. I know you are being sarcastic but I kind of agree
I breastfed my kids but not at the mall, never in a restaurant or any other public place; I stayed at home and fed them. It was a small sacrifice to make for giving them a healthy start in life. So my social life was a bit limited for a few months. But I survived.

Every time I see a woman breastfeeding in public I want to commend her for making the decision to breastfeed and then tell her she could be doing that in the privacy of her own home. Most restaurants have take out menus. Just sayin. :)
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:15 PM
Response to Reply #157
161. I did it everywhere
and anywhere I needed to. I was discreet, I covered up but I don't even care if someone else does that. It is just such a wonderful thing and it is so natural.

I will say that I did not do it right away, I waited until my boys were a little older (over a month) and more accustomed to the routine and I practiced covering them so they were comfortable. I never had a problem with anyone, I really doubt it was noticed.
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proud2BlibKansan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:41 PM
Response to Reply #161
164. If you covered up
you probably weren't noticed. I don't have much of a problem when women cover themselves. I don't think they are even noticed. It's the ones who whip it out and DON'T cover who get the attention. And what is it about restaurants? I have a friend I go out to eat with and we seem to see women breastfeeding a lot in restaurants. We wonder if the baby can smell the food and gets hungry? :) And I didn't breastfeed at the table. I didn't think it seemed polite, even in my own house.

I was lucky. I didn't go out much when I was nursing and didn't have to leave home often.
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noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 09:36 PM
Response to Reply #157
204. I hope you're being sarcastic
"Good on you for breastfeeding; now please be considerate to the rest of us and remain on house arrest for the next two years."

Gosh, I didn't have a car, a washing machine, a television, a microwave, a radio that broadcast in a language I could understand, or a husband that was regularly home, thanks to the military. And I sure didn't live in a town that had takeout food. LOL at the thought of me staying in my one room apartment alone out of consideration for you.

Heh, we would have had a nice conversation if you'd come up to me with a line like that.
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bloom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 08:40 PM
Response to Reply #15
163. Way back when
I had a life drawing teacher who must have been born around 1920 and I was shocked, SHOCKED, I tell you - to hear him spout off about how offensive he thought it was for pregnant women to be out in public. Holy schmolly.


It's nice to know we've come a little ways - where at least THAT is taken for granted by most people.

:eyes: :crazy: :eyes:
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:15 PM
Response to Reply #163
165. We'll see.
I don't see it lasting much longer if we do not take care of things. As soon as they are really actually certain they will remain in power I think we will be losing many of our rights as women. GLBT people will go first, then us. That is what I think anyway. We will be back in the kitchen and kept out of sight.
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bloom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:30 PM
Response to Reply #165
166. That does seem to be the direction
I wish people were more aware of what they could lose.

It seems too unbelievable - but you're right - we should take nothing for granted.
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 09:25 AM
Response to Original message
20. God, I wish we could ban "The View."
Not literally, but I plan to write my share of complaint-letters over this one. Fuck you, Puritanical hypocrites. May your ratings die, like so many of your brain cells obviously have.
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flygal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:15 PM
Response to Reply #20
68. BWAAA!! You beat me to it!!!
I loathe that show - except maybe Joy - that show is so lame. And I am a typical stay at home mom that they are supposed to be catering to. I'd rather watch reruns of Murder She Wrote.
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:36 PM
Response to Reply #68
97. Yeah, I thought about that issue, too (the fact that many female
Edited on Mon Jun-06-05 01:37 PM by BlueIris
parents watch their show, and some of them have to feed their babies at their offices, or whenever the babies get hungry, you know?). Like, some of the mothers in their audience weren't going to get insulted and offended? It wasn't just insensitive and revolting--it was stupid from a marketing, programming, not to mention standards-and-practices stand-point.
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aden_nak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:06 AM
Response to Original message
24. If God didn't want breast feeding, he wouldn't have given women nipples.
Not that I think there's any real substance to that argument, but it does make some people's heads spin.
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:37 AM
Response to Reply #24
26. Snerk. I don't think there's any substance to that argument, either,
but it's fun to make Puritanical, ignorant, misogynist hypocrite's heads spin around. Free entertainment.
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aden_nak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:42 AM
Response to Reply #26
29. You have to agrue on their level sometimes.
When people prove not only a desire but a preference for stupid, baseless arguments that "sound" like they make sense without actually saying a damn thing, then that's what you have to feed them. I mean, didn't God create women to have breasts for this very reason? Isn't that actually the true reason women have mamories, as opposed to being for some "dirty" or "pornographic" reason? Is it any different than pregnancy or delivery? Are you saying you know better than GOD about how someone's body should work?

Totally baseless. But it will get them all strung out. ;)
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:58 AM
Response to Reply #29
36. Heh. Yeah, I can't STAND people who insist their arguments
"make sense" with the twisted rhetorical non-logic they're using ("It's Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve," "If It Isn't a Baby, You're Not Pregant") but don't know how to "defend" their "positions" because those positions are just abstractions to them. They haven't thought them out in any reasonable, reality way, considered the applications, etc. Because they're inconsiderate, brainwashed poopy-heads.
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:17 PM
Response to Reply #24
71. Yes, but why did god give men nipples?
:)
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aden_nak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:26 PM
Response to Reply #71
81. So that we could Purple Nurple each other, of course.
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:28 PM
Response to Reply #81
82. I'm afraid to ask, but I will anyway.
What's a Purple Nurple? :scared:
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aden_nak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:35 PM
Response to Reply #82
96. It is a particularly painful form of locker room "humor".
By which, when one of your friends is either wearing no shirt or else simply a thin t-shirt or athletic shirt, you grab the nipple between your thumb and the side of your index finger (much as you might grab the knob on a radio) and then twist it as far as your wrist will allow. This generally causes the affected area to turn purple, and causes the affected friend to shriek, fall down holding their nipple, and often scheme to deliver a ninja-like strike to your groin.

http://www.odps.org/glossword/index.php?a=term&d=4&t=9231
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:41 PM
Response to Reply #96
100. Ouch.
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aden_nak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:01 PM
Response to Reply #100
114. Well I didn't say that it was pleasant.
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geniph Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 04:05 PM
Response to Reply #96
145. Oh. I always called that homoeroticism.
;-)
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aden_nak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:34 AM
Response to Reply #145
178. That too.
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Carni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 07:26 PM
Response to Reply #96
159. Man what gym are you going to!
YIKES! :(
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aden_nak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:34 AM
Response to Reply #159
177. It's primarily a high school antics type of thing.
We're all grown up now. We just break wind at each other.
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Carni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 07:51 PM
Response to Reply #177
199. LOL! Nothing wrong with that!
Kidding of course ;)
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dweller Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:40 AM
Response to Original message
28. More Breaking... POLL...2 out of 3 babies down on The View







dp
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Behind the Aegis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:41 PM
Response to Reply #28
101. Is that poll accurate?
Seems two are clearly against "The View." However, baby 3 seems to want a joint and probably only watches "The View" stoned! :)
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Horse with no Name Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:44 AM
Response to Original message
30. Soooo let me get this straight
The baby is hungry.
There isn't anywhere to go feed them discreetly, so you are supposed to let them starve? Isn't that child abuse?
What is sexual about a baby eating?
I would rather see a baby suckling a breast than these girls that wear thongs and pants that ride so low you can see everything when they bend over.
The difference is...that a baby suckling isn't pleasing to a male pig who wants to gawk at bare breasts whereas a cute teen girl with her ass hanging out is.
(I don't think either should be outlawed, just making a point)
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Carni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:18 PM
Response to Reply #30
73. Have to agree that thong/ low slung pants look is really getting annoying
I thought I was being puritanical until my husband complained that he was sick of seeing people treating "plumber's butt" as a fashion statement.

Additionally I am seeing a lot of *bend over and show it all people* with posteriors, that quite frankly, most of us don't want to see under any circumstances!



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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:46 AM
Response to Original message
31. yet people who wear ill-fitting clothes are allowed to walk around
or my goofy neighbor who parades around in just his tiny shorts so that the whole world can see his hairy back, beer gut and farmer tan?
ooh...that's okay...but a mother nursing her infant is a crime?

Puhlease....

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splat@14 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:12 PM
Response to Reply #31
65. Yep, spandex is a privilege, not a right! n/t
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:18 PM
Response to Reply #31
72. Oooh, I'm going to have to come over for a visit!
Your neighbor sounds like quite the stud! :D
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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:27 PM
Response to Reply #72
171. oh yeah...he is a prince...
:puke:
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Protagoras Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:48 AM
Response to Original message
33. Fear those Breasts!
In the name of good Cultural Values we must hide the flesh!

God, I'm glad my TV is off.
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kenny blankenship Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:16 AM
Response to Reply #33
41. Feed the Breasts!
They need nuturing and care.
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tishaLA Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:52 AM
Response to Original message
34. Here's the story:
Star Jones-Reynolds has always hated breast feeding and hates to even think about it. Her idiotic co-star, Elisabeth Hasselbeck, even said on one episode that if Mrs. Jones-Reynolds ever had a baby Ms. Hasselbeck would have to breast feed it (to which Mrs. Jones-Reynolds replied, "Oh a white woman breast feeding a black baby! That'd be a switch!"). I know the world is horrified in advance about the possibility of Mrs. Jones-Reynolds and GAl (that's gay Al, Mrs. Jones-Reynolds husband) reproducing, but don't worry! They were both "re-born virgins" when they married, even though we think GAl just did that so he wouldn't have to bone her before he was making cheddar for it.

Recently, when Mrs. Hasselbeck returned from her maternity leave, the "ladies" were talking about breast feeding (Mrs. Hasselbeck has apparently stopped already and her baby is two months old, FWIW). Mrs. Walters yammered on and on about how uncomfortable she was when a woman on an airplane was breast feeding RIGHT BESIDE HER and, even though Mrs. Walters knew she was trying to be subtle about it, Mrs. Walters just COULDN'T STOP LOOKING....so much so that the embalming fluid nearly drained from her face and her soft focus halo almost disappeared. This was part of an extended discussion about Elisabeth being a "new mommy"--cripes, they actually use that phrase--and it earned Mrs. Walters lots of ire apparently.

So that's the story. I should say that I watch The View almost every day not because I enjoy it but because I despise it...and I most often just watch the first segment or two, during "Hot Topics." Why? Because I write on another discussion board as much snark as possible about Mrs. Jones-Reynolds, a woman who gives me more snark material than I could ever imagine. If the whole world were filled with Star Jones-Reynolds, I would be an insult comic on par with Don Rickles.
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Patiod Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:01 PM
Response to Reply #34
115. soft focus halo almost disappeared...
Mrs. Walters just COULDN'T STOP LOOKING....so much so that the embalming fluid nearly drained from her face and her soft focus halo almost disappeared.


:rofl:
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geniph Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 04:07 PM
Response to Reply #115
146. That embalming fluid line is the single funniest thing I've read today
LOL!
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noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 09:28 PM
Response to Reply #34
203. pffft, a white breast feeding a black baby isn't anything new
When my (white) mom had my sister, there was another (black) woman in the hospital that had twin preemies. The doctors said they had to have breastmilk to survive because they were so young. For whatever reason, their mom couldn't/wouldn't breastfeed them. So my mother volunteered. She breastfed my sister and the two twins. Even after my mom was discharged from the hospital, she continued to provide milk for those two.

That was almost 50 years ago.

I don't know what Star Jones's problem is, but she's way off base on that one.
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Crankie Avalon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:54 AM
Response to Original message
35. Have Star Jones or Babara Walters ever had children?
Doesn't sound like it. In fact, from the sound of things, maybe they should add Ann Coulter to their panel.

If milk ever came out of one of those paps, it would probably be curdled.
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LibDemAlways Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:30 PM
Response to Reply #35
83. Star is childless.
Barbara has an adopted daughter.

My two cents. I have no problem with women breastfeeding babies in public. However, I have a friend who was still breastfeeding her three-year-old. The kid would walk up to her, lift up her shirt, and demand to be fed. I thought that was over the top.
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Crankie Avalon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:03 PM
Response to Reply #83
90. The woman was still lactating...
...three years after giving birth?
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LibDemAlways Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:28 PM
Response to Reply #90
95. Yes, true story.
She breastfed until her daughter wanted to quit. By then the child was close to four.
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:50 PM
Response to Reply #90
142. It's not unusual
the average global weaning age is four. I know of kids who nursed for quite a bit longer than that (the oldest I know of was eight when she gave it up.)
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Dora Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 12:10 PM
Response to Reply #90
191. Lactation is a supply/demand process
Boring anatomy lesson:

Breasts will lactate in response to the baby's nursing (combined with necessary hormones floating around in the mix). If an infant/child continues to nurse, the breasts will continue to lactate.

So, if a woman is concerned about not having "enough" milk, the first recourse is to have her nurse the baby more frequently in order to stimulate lactation.

Quiz tomorrow morning.
:boring:
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Debbi801 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:59 PM
Response to Reply #83
112. Ummm. I'm still nursing my 3 yr old...
Although at this point, it is only in the privacy of our home before bed time. There have been multiple studies showing the continued benefits of extended breast feeding. If you'd like, I can provide the links.

Generally, children will wean somewhere between 3 & 4 years old on their own. When my son is ready, he'll wean.

In the meantime, I will continue to reap the benefits of a child that has never been any sicker than having a cold (even though he has been at a day care center since he was 8 weeks old), has never been on antibiotics, and that is very secure and outgoing.

Debbi
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progmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:20 PM
Response to Reply #112
124. just a post of support for you Debbi
:thumbsup:
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Debbi801 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:48 PM
Response to Reply #124
128. Hey, thanks Progmom!
There aren't many things that inspire me to post in GD, but this is one of them. :-)

:hi:

Debbi
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:34 PM
Response to Reply #112
135. nursing toddlers was a way to save their lives less than 100 years ago
weaning was acknowledged to be a very dangerous time, and to be avoided at certain times of the year (summer especially because of the heat making foods go bad).

Humans are actually meant to be nursed for the first several years of their lives. "Baby teeth" used to be called "milk teeth".

"Mothering Your Nursing Toddler" by La Leche League is a great resource for moms who don't feel the need to wean because a certain birthday is reached. None of mine chose to nurse past 2.5 but there is a joke that goes, "How old is too old to be nursing?" Answer: "6 months after yours weaned".

By the time most children are 3 or older, breast milk is less a source of nutrition than a source of comfort and love (like a blanket or favorite doll). However, when my toddlers were ill, I was always so happy that they were still nursing, because there were times when they couldn't keep anything else down, and I knew they were getting something much better for what ailed them than Pedialyte.
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:50 PM
Response to Reply #112
141. Have you ever read A Tree Grows in Brooklyn?
the description of Gussie's weaning is hysterical for those of us who have nursed toddlers.
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Debbi801 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 06:34 PM
Response to Reply #141
153. Thanks for the recommendation...
I'll have to check that book out of the library.

Thanks for the support.
Debbi
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Desertrose Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 04:26 PM
Response to Reply #112
149. like you, I nursed my daughter til she was 3....
just before bed....She's 23 this year and has had way way fewer illnesses or infections all through her life. No allergies either. We never made it a big deal and so it wasn't...did get comments from some less liberal friends about it though. I told them it really wasn't any of their business.

Nursed my son for a shorter time....he was just a different kind of kid, but they both had very few infections or illnesses than thier friends who were bottle fed..

Breast is best if you can do it...not everyone can in these times though with jobs etc etc.

Too bad our society has made such a big deal about breasts...I wonder about the effects of so many implants etc on the future health of these women ...all just to fit into some strange American standard of ....???

(I remember my Mom telling me that back in the early 1900's it was not so unusual to nurse children til they were 6 or 7.)
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Debbi801 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 06:33 PM
Response to Reply #149
152. Thanks for the note...
I went back to work when my son was 8 weeks old. But, this was a priority. So, when I went back to work, my trusty pump went back with me. :-) I was able to express enough so that he never got formula. But, I've also known people who have needed to supplement with formula and that's OK too.

Luckily, my husband has been my biggest supporter. So, I have never had the pressure to wean him before he is ready.

Debbi

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booksenkatz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 04:31 PM
Response to Reply #112
150. Support from here too, Deb -- nursed mine until age 3 1/2
I was one of those people who always thought that nursing a child anything beyond a year was eeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Then I had a child and realized how absolutely normal and natural the whole process is. In some countries, it is normal for 6-year-olds to nurse occasionally. What the hell is wrong with the USA, why are we so hung up about this?

My son weaned when he was ready. I happened to get the flu when he was 3 1/2 and so we just found other ways to "cuddle."

He has always been a radiantly healthy child with impossibly gorgeous skin. No earaches. No antibiotics because he had no earaches. I am certain that it's because of the extended BF period. As you say, when he got older, it became more of a bedtime only thing, or maybe an early morning only thing. And I swear it felt absolutely normal to do it, and that is coming from someone who felt 180 degrees the other way about it before! LOL

I spent most of those 3 1/2 years with people urging, begging and cajoling me to wean him (not my husband, thankfully) and it got ridiculous to listen to all of that whining!

Keep up the good work!

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Debbi801 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 06:40 PM
Response to Reply #150
154. It's funny how your prospective changes...
With my first, I had very unsupportive husband and no one else that I knew was nursing. I was happy that I made it a year and that was with supplementing. With my second, I had even less support and stopped when I went back to work. Then, I got smart and divorced my husband.

With my third, I had the internets for support. :-) Plus, my current husband is all for it. So, continuing to nurse at 3 seems like no big deal at all.

Debbi
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SarahB Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:14 PM
Response to Reply #112
169. More support.
I nursed my children... for:

oldest- one year
2nd, 3rd, and 4th- 2 to almost 3 years each (didn't make it past the 3rd birthday though, but I fully support it). I have spent about 8 years of my life as a nursing mom in total. It's just a part of life. My children are all very healthy, smart, outgoing, and secure young people. I have no doubt that the security they had as infants and toddlers played a huge role in their development and breastfeeding was a huge part in it.

You go! :thumbsup:
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:46 AM
Response to Reply #112
183. More support for you!
I wish I could have done that... good for you!

:hug:
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Dora Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 12:15 PM
Response to Reply #112
192. More support.
And thanks for your post. We won't be able to afford our at-home babysitter much longer, and I've had fears about group daycare and illness. I've had my suspicions that breastfeeding would eliminate a lot of those concerns, and your post just validated that.

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Telly Savalas Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 01:18 PM
Response to Reply #112
198. Our kid is 3 yrs. 1.5 months old and she still nurses.
but like your case, it's only at night (or sometimes at naptime if my wife is home during the day).

3 years ago it would have seemed weird, but now that it's our reality, it seems perfectly normal.
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mondo joe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:46 PM
Response to Reply #83
138. And she'll stay childless while she has a gay husband!
Or maybe not.
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Dorian Gray Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:58 PM
Response to Reply #83
144. You have one of those friends, too?
One of my friends breast feeds her three year old twice a day, and her four and a half year old once a day.

I'm sorry, but that did freak me out a bit. The little guy is going to enter Kindergarten in September.
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:41 AM
Response to Reply #83
182. The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests AT LEAST TWO years.
So no, it's definitely not over the top.
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LibDemAlways Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:56 AM
Response to Reply #182
185. I didn't say breastfeeding a three year old was necessarily
over the top. What I found strange was the mother's allowing the child to lift up her shirt and demand to be fed anywhere at any time. That, to me, was a bit much.

My daughter was bottle-fed. For whatever reason I never produced any milk and had no choice but to bottle feed, but that's neither here nor there. My pediatrician got upset when my daughter still had a bottle at age one. He said all kids should be weaned and using a cup by then. Opinions differ among pediatricians, just as among mothers.
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 11:08 AM
Response to Reply #185
187. Yeah that is strange.
I think the effort to get young children off of rubber nipples is due to the presusre on developing teeth. That pressure isn't there with real nipples.

The AAP and WHO both say that children who are weaned off the breast before age 2.5 are at increased risk of illness. I'm sure if you were breastfeeding he wouldn't have given the same advice.
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gollygee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-08-05 10:11 AM
Response to Reply #185
211. He probably meant "weaned from a bottle"
unless he believes something contrary to every health organization in the world, he doesn't believe breastfed children should be weaned by a year. If he does, I personally wouldn't trust his medical knowledge and judgement.
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:00 AM
Response to Original message
37. Yay!
I get to write a nasty letter!

;)
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mongo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:21 PM
Response to Reply #37
76. I hope everyone follows in your footsteps
and writes nasty letters. What a joke.

Actually, the Ohio legislature, in a rare moment of reason recently LEGALIZED breast feeding in public. Can you belive you could have acually have been arrested for feeding your kid in public?

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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:03 AM
Response to Original message
39. Oh, don't get me started on this subject
because (and I have seen this several times) the sight of a woman propping a bottle up for her baby in a stroller/car seat so that she can shop or eat in peace makes me much more uncomfortable than a woman sitting down, holding her baby (with her ARMS AND HANDS no less) and breastfeeding him/her. If you are going to feed your baby, be it breast or bottle, please hold your little one while you are doing it. You are giving them so much more than food at these times.

I have nothing against bottle-feeding for those who choose it. My beef is with those who give up the human contact for their baby along with the breast. Some people can't breastfeed, some people can and choose not to - both are fine with me. But don't criticize a woman who chooses to breastfeed, and don't force her into a dirty public restroom to do it please.
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donsu Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:10 PM
Response to Reply #39
63. oh I agree about bottle propping and not holding the baby


babies need that contact - it reassures them - makes them feel safe. and you can hum and sing to them during and after.

just plunking a baby into one of those v shaped seats and propping the bottle is putting the baby in isolation.
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cestpaspossible Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:04 AM
Response to Original message
40. As an adolescent boy, I was fascinated by women breastfeeding in public
somehow the bare breast, which I was so eager to see at any time, was no longer a 'sexual object' but simply a functional part of a woman's body.

Is that really a bad lesson for people to learn?

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RedCloud Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:22 AM
Response to Original message
42. I was once next to a breast feeding woman!
It was on a bus. It was in South America. It was feeding time. She asked me to hold something while she got ready. Then she asked me to hold her bra while she fed. She had twins! So I stayed on the bus for ten extra miles.

Nobody thought anything of it. Simple act of nature. We are mammals, despite what the religious right says, aren't we?

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Iris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:45 AM
Response to Reply #42
50. It takes a village . . .
Wouldn't it be nice if our culture supported families with small children?
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:51 AM
Response to Reply #50
52. only if they're small enough to still fit in the womb
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Iris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:00 PM
Response to Reply #52
55. Yep - I forgot. BTW - I liked your post further up.
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:37 PM
Response to Reply #55
126. thanks - sore point with me
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flygal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:22 PM
Response to Reply #42
77. I love this post!!
We are mammals! So true so true! I'm a bfing mom and it is just part of the whole process. My boob is no different than a playtex nurser right now except I haven't spent a dime on formula and I get to relax and cuddle with my baby.

In public I try to be discreet - if it disturbs people - please look away for a few minutes - it's not intentional, it's just hard to avoid sometimes.
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shrike Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:24 AM
Response to Original message
43. Can't see how this would be an issue or even something to talk about
When was the last time I saw a woman breastfeed in public? Hmmm. Can't recall ... I'm sure they're doing it, but so discreetly I don't even notice.
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Telly Savalas Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:39 AM
Response to Original message
46. When I get hungry in public...
I usually go to a restroom to eat. If I can't find such a place, I at least have the decency to put a blanket over my head while I eat. I don't see why it's unfair to hold infants to the same standard.
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:45 AM
Response to Reply #46
49. can't argue with that!
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splat@14 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:15 PM
Response to Reply #46
69. LOL, Absolutely, and if ya wanna take a dump in your pants......n/t
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:36 PM
Response to Reply #46
86. YAY!
Thanks for putting those ridiclous requests into perspective!

:applause:
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LizW Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:42 AM
Response to Original message
47. I can't imagine
Star and Barb being anywhere where women would be breastfeeding in public. I don't think women do it very often at the plastic surgeon's or the salon or at chic restaurants or cocktail parties.

So, as far as I'm concerned, they can stuff it.

I see women breastfeeding all the time and it's not an issue. Yesterday, a lady was feeding her baby at the pool while her other kids swam. She had a towel across her and the baby so I would not have noticed, except I saw her getting the baby in place, and as a former breastfeeding mom, I recognized the maneuver.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:00 PM
Response to Reply #47
56. personally i would rather a towel not being over a babies head
Edited on Mon Jun-06-05 12:00 PM by seabeyond
while it is sucking. especially seeing how it must have been hot, out at the pool, and the breeze brushing against the face and in the hair of the baby would have been heaven. even without a towel the way a baby sucks youdont see much of a breast as it is. this is silly to me.
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Fifth of Five Donating Member (241 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:14 PM
Response to Reply #56
67. Amen!
When I breastfed my children, the eye-contact was incredible. They both would lock eyes with me while eating. Incredible experience. I never put a blanket or towel over my child's head while breast-feeding; it just seemed wrong to block them off from me.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:19 PM
Response to Reply #67
74. exactly
that is what first drew me to the post is i would never for anyone give up the eye to eye, caressing while breatfeeding. but when i started typng i was feeling hte heat and claustrophobia for the baby and thinking of a cool breeze. i forgot to post the original reason i wouldnt have a towel. lol

shaking head in sadness, that we feel the need to do this to the baby .......... cause of a tit, being used not for sexuality, ut merely feeding a baby.

bet everyone would defend that tits right to be bare if it was about turning on a man
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Iris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:23 PM
Response to Reply #67
79. lighten up!
I'm sure the woman doesn't cover her child's head EVERY time she feeds him!
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:43 PM
Response to Reply #79
127. the whole towel over the head thing = discretion confuses me...
anyone who sees a woman with a baby on her lap and a blanket covering one shoulder and her baby might as well be wearing a neon sign "I AM BREASTFEEDING RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW".

That, to me, is not discretion. I nursed everywhere and the only time I was ever busted was in line at a store. I had my third little guy in a beautiful Maya wrap sling, it was mid-December and I was not about to give up my place in the long holiday shopping line I was in, at the Warner Brothers Store. So, I nursed him, with no one the wiser. Until he decided he was done... he popped his head out of the sling, lightning fast, milk dripping down his chin, and belched like nobody's business. I will never forget that moment!! Several other moms were grinning, only one looked at me in horror.

Ahhh, good times....
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Iris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:57 PM
Response to Reply #127
131. if it makes the mother more comfortable
than she should do it.

No woman is served by rigid behavioral requirements from both ends of the spectrum. Personally, if I were nursing a baby at the pool, I'd be covering my breasts to shield them from the sun as I'm very fair skinned.

BTW - I LOVE the head out of the sling story! It makes me picture your son as a mischievous little bear in a cartoon!


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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:04 PM
Response to Reply #131
132. I never meant that if there is no blanket a woman's breast is exposed
there are lots of slings and nursing shirts that hide the entire event without any exposure at all.

My favorite way to nurse in public was to take an old tank top, cut it about 4" below the bra line and put a buttoned shirt over it. When it was time to nurse, unbutton enough of outer shirt to fit baby (leaving bottom button or two in place to cover post-partum belly!!) lift up inner shirt a tad, latch baby on. The inner shirt rests a little on your baby's face, but no one can see anything and when they unlatch and move their head away, the inner shirt drops down in place to prevent any "flashing". It worked great for all three of mine.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:36 PM
Response to Reply #132
136. that is so creative. what a nifty cool idea.
i like. i remember another thread, where people were suggesting taking the baby into the ladies room to feed. a huge ass eeeeeew. lol.

i like that idea. i am too old, but will remember for mothers that come along
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Coexist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:47 PM
Response to Reply #136
139. thanks - I got the idea from a nursing tank top I couldn't afford!
So I made my own.
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LizW Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:24 PM
Response to Reply #56
80. True, that crossed my mind, too
but, you know, I was just glad to see her doing it. In today's puritanical climate you never know when some jerk is going to come up and yell at you for feeding your child.
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mnmod Donating Member (36 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:42 PM
Response to Reply #56
102. Thats why you use receiving blankets
thinner, air passess through easily, and its easy to leave a molded gar so that the baby can see the mom but only somebosy who gets right up to her and looks down the opening can see anything.


now at home my wife uses an easy nurser and just walks around half nude, as it should be..

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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:02 PM
Response to Reply #102
116. as it should be..
thank you dad. gosh i love when dads talk about stuff like this. told husband years and years ago, no better turn on than to see a father on the floor playing with his babies. love pure love, does a mama's heart good.
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JerseygirlCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-08-05 07:24 AM
Response to Reply #56
207. Depends on the situation
sometimes a light blanket or even a towel provides some much-needed shade.
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undeterred Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:44 AM
Response to Original message
48. I spent a summer in Central Africa where the breast is not much
of a sexual object. All women who are able to breastfeed do so, sometimes for years. Its not unusual to see a woman take out her breast in public to feed her baby- heck, its not unusual to see 4 or 5 year olds run up to a woman who is not their mother and ask for a drink. (I had to tell several of the children more than once that MINE were not in working order.) The only people who were uncomfortable with public breastfeeding were American men, who seem to have forgotten that breasts have this 'other' purpose!
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:48 AM
Response to Original message
51. i was talking to father about this recently. in 60's us kids would run
up on a breastfeeding mama all the time. no one cared. no one paid attention. no one was offended. my father says, ya,.....my time too, and that was the fourties and fifties.

what has happened to us.

breastfeeding offensive, just odd. gotta leave those breast for sex sex sex, cant be taking them back to nature. that might be like too healthy for our society, we wouldnt want that
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Catchawave Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 11:57 AM
Response to Original message
53. The only time I watch "THE View" is when.....
...SNL parodies them.
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midnight armadillo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:04 PM
Response to Original message
58. WTF is The View?
And isn't Star Jones the one they dubbed 'Bridezilla'? Who are these people, and why do people pay them money to be idiots?
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newportdadde Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:04 PM
Response to Original message
59. Ugh.. its nature people.
I LOVED that my wife breast fed our son. She did it very discretely nothing showed etc maybe a little of her tummy as she placed him under her shirt etc. The best part was when he was hungry there was always a ready supply of food available.

I say take some of these anti public breast feeding people and giving them a baby screaming for milk away from the house with no bottle(and in the case of Barbara Wawa or Star.. no live-in nanny) and see how fast they would okay breast feeding.
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Ilsa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:09 PM
Response to Original message
61. If it is so wrong, then someone should tell Star to cover up!

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donco6 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:10 PM
Response to Original message
64. I couldn't care less.
I've never seen a woman being indiscrete about it. Usually have a diaper hanging over the front of her body. What's the big deal?
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ConfuZed Donating Member (856 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:13 PM
Response to Original message
66. Let me just say I can't stand Star Jones n/t
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Cleita Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:20 PM
Response to Original message
75. Some conservative women (read subservient women) are
harder on women rights than the men are. I think it's because a little flirting will often soften a man's attitude. I can't see where flirting with Star Jones and Barbara Walters would get them to give an inch.
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AX10 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 12:59 PM
Response to Original message
89. First of all "The View" is a horrible show. Second,
breast feeding a natural part of human existance. The breast in not fully exposed anyways. But with all the pro-Bush bias I see on that "show", I'm not suprised that they are pushing such ignorance upon the masses.

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Hello_Kitty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 08:52 PM
Response to Reply #89
201. Agreed and agreed
The View sucks and I've been in the presense of women breastfeeding on numerous occasions. It's done so discreetly most of the time that you barely notice it's going on. Guess those idiots didn't have anything else to talk about on the show that day.
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Pithlet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:12 PM
Response to Original message
92. What a couple of idiots.
I hate that show.
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johnaries Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:44 PM
Response to Original message
103. What I want to know is....
what is the Best View of breast feeding in public? :evilgrin:
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Prisoner_Number_Six Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:50 PM
Response to Original message
104. While I was eating in a restaurant a few days ago, I glanced
over at the next table to see a young mother breast feeding her tiny baby. She had covered herself as best as she could, and in truth it was something that didn't seem the least bit out of place or offensive. It was merely a mother feeding her child in a natural manner, and I didn't for even a moment get excited in any way.

I don't see what the horrible part of this act is supposed to be. The people who are so against it obviously have severe personal issues, and should be taken aside and quietly reeducated. The rest of the world will simply turn back to what they were doing, and a hungry child will have their meal in peace.
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:07 PM
Response to Reply #104
120. Honestly, what is the big deal about a woman nursing a baby?
If it makes someone uncomfortable, they shouldn't look. I don't get why people get so twisted about this. It's natural, it's a child getting a meal. Big deal.
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meganmonkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 01:56 PM
Response to Original message
107. We should all be able to walk around topless anyway
If any woman got arrested and took it as high as the SCOTUS it would probably be legalized.

Hooray for boobs! :P
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Stinky The Clown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:14 PM
Response to Original message
122. Sparkly + H2S (+ former spouses) = 3 kids (all breast fed)
When I see this thread (actually, not the thread, but what caused it) coupled with that one a few days ago about someone trying to get women to hide their nipples when they're erect ( http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=104&topic_id=3778550 ), and I get a whole big "What the FUCK?????" jag going.

I'm tellin' ya ..... there's only one solution ...... one thing that will make the wacko motherfuckers happy .......

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Kber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 02:24 PM
Response to Original message
125. I'm breastfeeding my seven-week old now - does that count as "public"?
Edited on Mon Jun-06-05 02:34 PM by Kber
Seriously, if you have an issue w/breastfeeding in public, your two options are
1) don't breastfeed
or
2) don't go out in public

'cause someday you will be out, and your kid will be literally crying from hunger, and, well, you are going to feed her, other's opinions be damned. It's a maternal instinct thing.

I also think that one of "society's" biggest issue with breastfeeding is that it's free - no one profits when you don't break out the formula - which is EXPENSIVE btw.

Lastly, let me say that anyone sexually aroused by any activity involving a 7 week old baby should call their shrink immediately before they become a danger to themselves or others. I do think breasts can be very sexy - but not when a baby is hanging off one. (Beautiful in a whole different way you might say.)

on edit - OK we're done nursing - if any of you out there who were offended or made to feel uncomfortable, it's save to come back to the thread now. :)
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mondo joe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 03:48 PM
Response to Original message
140. I'd rather see breastfeeding in public than Star Jones polishing off
Edited on Mon Jun-06-05 03:48 PM by mondo joe
another deep fried pig, or whatever it is she eats.
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philosophie_en_rose Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 04:11 PM
Response to Original message
147. What's wrong with breasts? Breasts should be rated TV-G
Are boobs obscene? Is it some unfortunate twist of nature that inflicts the sight of mammaries upon poor unfortunate newborns? :eyes:


All babies see breasts. Breasts are baby food. Frankly, Barbara Walters owes that mother an apology for staring.

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geniph Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 04:15 PM
Response to Original message
148. They're probably uncomfortable with it because they'd give buttermilk
Sour old cows that they are.

The vast majority of the time I'm around women who are breastfeeding, I don't even realize they're doing it unless I have occasion to look closely at them. Most women are quite discreet about it. And if they aren't - well so what? It's a baby eating, for crying out loud, it's not as if the woman was taking a crap on the streetcorner. I'm way more offended by people who'll change a poopy diaper wherever they happen to be. (Yes, I have seen people change a poopy diaper in the middle of someone else's living room carpet, in a roomful of people. THAT should be done in the bathroom!)

Mammary glands don't exist for sexual titillation. If they happen to provide it, well, then more power to ya, but their primary purpose is to feed infants. When they're used for that purpose, I fail to see what is so horrid about it that everyone must be shielded from the sight.

We are one seriously fucked-up culture. TITS ARE EVIL, evil I tell ya!

:sarcasm:
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Warren DeMontague Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 04:37 PM
Response to Original message
151. They can fuck off. Here in California, Breast-Feeding Women are
protected. BY LAW.

http://www.lalecheleague.org/Law/Bills11.html

Cal. Civ. Code §43.3
1997 Cal ALS 59; 1997 Cal AB 157; Stats 1997 ch 59

Notwithstanding any other provision of law, a mother may breastfeed her child in any location, public or private, except the private home or residence of another, where the mother and child are authorized to be present.

Screw Them If They Can't Deal With It- It's Nature!

Breastfeeding is not a sexual act, and it's only because our society is so screwed up and repressed that we have fetishised boobs to such a ridiculous degree, anyway.

If you ask me, this is more people pathologically incapable of dealing with visual evidence of the fact that we are MAMMALS. Sheesh.
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spanone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 07:23 PM
Response to Original message
158. I don't think Star Jones or Barbara Walters live in the REAL world.
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SarahB Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:04 PM
Response to Original message
168. They obviously have their own body issues.
Women have breasts. Breasts are designed to nourish babies. Breasts are beautiful anyway. Eating is normal. Babies eat. Babies are meant to drink milk from their mothers. Mothers have every right to go places with their babies. Babies eat frequently. Therefore, the babies will want to nurse sometimes in public. People who have a problem with it need help for their own damned hangups. It's doubtful they're comfortable with their bodies in many respects if something so normal and simple gets them so riled up. Get some f*cking therapy for your issues and leave these poor new moms alone. Parenting is stressful enough without some jackass telling you that they find you and your baby offensive. Ever see the manners of some adults when they eat? Now that's offensive.

Again- my favorite breastfeeding link- http://www.promom.org/101/ .



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TexasLady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-06-05 10:19 PM
Response to Original message
170. Why do we make WOMEN
feel bad about the breast, the feeding from the breast, the shaving of the pits, the wrinkles above the brow, the lack of makeup, the nipples showing...seems to me it is catering to the big plan of corporate America to be ever ashamed of nipples or armpit hair or makeup because once again, thier advertising has worked to the core.

I say, feed the babies, screw the makeup, and let the pits grow! and on and on and on!!!!! woohoo!!!!!!!


well, it is a fun thought anyway. Americans seem to have this problem above all other countries...and sly advertising that says to feed from a bottle has made sure of it.. as has all the other crap I just mentioned...
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NMMNG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 01:07 AM
Response to Original message
172. One more reason for me to never watch that stupid show
Why is it ok for women to walk around half naked as routine, with their breasts half exposed for fashion....

yet if a breast is partially exposed to feed a baby people have a hissy fit?

:wtf:
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Jacobin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 10:32 AM
Response to Original message
176. Why are Americans afraid of baby bottles?
This is all some exceedingly weird psychosis, imho.

$500,000 fine for flashing a baby bottle at the superbowl.

This is one weird fucked up country.
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Shadowen Donating Member (742 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-07-05 12:53 PM
Response to Original message
197. I wish their guest that day...
Had started questioning about them...

And then totally gone off on them, like it was an issue of particular importance to them, and stormed off the set.
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