"Don't tell Barbara Walters about the voices": Wingnut preacher memo!

[johnfunk]

Once again, the boys and girls at the Come and Take It blog come up with a real gem via their pal PinkDome. This time, it's a memo from a right-wing evangelical preacher to his flock about how to act on camera:

If a camera is on you during a worship service, worship; don't dance, jump, etc. Secular people watching TV are touched with authentic worship, but jumping and dancing in church looks too bizarre for most to relate to. Remember, people watching TV news are not experiencing what you are experiencing. They are watching and thinking. Worship indicates sincerity, dancing and jumping looks like excessive emotionalism.

...

Barbara Walters is working on a story about heaven and will interview me

[snip]

if she talks with you, don't be spooky or weird. Don't switch into a glassy-eyed heavenly mode

That's right -- you wouldn't want to frighten viewers with the truth about your insane, delusional, brainwashed behavior now, would you...

[Coexist]

someone here has a scary photo of a woman in "glassy-eyed"

heavenly mode - if it is you and you read this - Please post it!!!

[Bluebear]

3. We aim to please

[proud2BlibKansan]

10. Reminds me of a bathroom sign

We Aim To Please, So You Aim TOO Please

[JAbuchan08]

1. Broken by the Colorado blogger - Nonprophet

they did a follow-up in the local Denver Weekly: Westword. You might be able to track down the article at Westword.com. It's pretty short, but an interesting read.

[Momgonepostal]

2. Strange that he needs to tell people this

Do they usually act spooky and weird?

[johnfunk]

4. He understands that it's crucial...

.. for Pod People to act like the ''fit in.'' Otherwise, their ''crusade'' to subvert the nation is toast.

[BiggJawn]

5. "They are watching and thinking..."

As opposed to the folks on camera getting into their Rapture cult experience.

Oh, please, let 'em see you doing that little skipping 2-step that Jimmy Swaggert said was the ONLY type of "dancing" that's "acceptable" to the Lord...

[proud2BlibKansan]

6. Hey show us all of this

It's too good to edit. LOL

1. If a camera is on you during a worship service, worship;
don't dance, jump, etc. Secular people watching TV are touched
with authentic worship, but jumping and dancing in church
looks too bizarre for most to relate to. Remember, people
watching TV news are not experiencing what you are
experiencing. They are watching and thinking. Worship
indicates sincerity, dancing and jumping looks like excessive
emotionalism.

2. If reporters want to interview you, talk with them, but use
words that make sense to them. Speak their language. Don't
talk about the devil, demons, voices speaking to you, God
giving you supernatural revelations, etc. Instead, tell your
personal story in common sense language (I was a drunk but God changed me and now I'm sober, I'm grateful, etc.).

3. Don't be nervous. Be friendly and open. Reporters typically
don't have an agenda, they authentically want to know what we
do and why we do it. For example, Barbara Walters is working
on a story about heaven and will interview me and get some
supporting shots from the church. She might not use any of it,
but she wants to put together an interesting story. Since we
believe in heaven, we are, in fact, a good source. So, if she
talks with you, don't be spooky or weird. Don't switch into a
glassy-eyed heavenly mode, just answer, "Heaven is real. It's
the place where God will be fully present with his people. He
will reward people in heaven. Heaven is better than Colorado
Springs." Say it straight and clear. Don't worry (Yeah,
sure!).

[Sydnie]

7. Does Barbara Walters have that memo?

If not, we should all forward it to her. It could change the story significantly! Imagine the good "Rev" responding to questions like "Why don't you want your congregation responding during the service in an honest manner, reflecting what one would experience if they attended your services in person?". Or "Did you instruct your congregation to "not be weird" while our cameras were rolling in your church?".

Could make a much better show than the one she had originally intended.

[wtmusic]

8. And above all, don't talk about the "White Night" or drinking Kool-Aid n/t

[JAbuchan08]

9. I love your sig line.

That Tom Tomorrow cartoon is great.

You know its weird. I actually remember a time when he ripped on Democrats more than he ripped on Republicans.
Its amazing how things change.

[johnfunk]

11. Prime-time KICK!

And remember: don't be spooky or weird. Don't switch into a glassy-eyed heavenly mode!

[geniph]

12. What really struck me about this

when I first read it a couple of weeks ago is that he's telling them NOT to be filled with the Holy Spirit while the cameras are on them. That's allegedly what causes them to jump up and down, act "spooky and weird," dance, speak in tongues, etc. The Lord fills them with the Holy Spirit and speaks and moves through them.

So shouldn't the memo be addressed to God?

By addressing such a memo to the congregation, he is implicitly admitting that it's all bullshit. They're faking it to get attention and praise. I mean, I always knew that, but they're admitting it!