If they start a draft, why not have everyone just say they're gay?

[begin_within]

[kansasblue]

1. how about....

we fix the real problem and make sure we only fight necessary wars and if a draft is truly needed then I think all DUers will agree we should welcome the chance to serve our country.

[gmoney]

2. Don't ask, don't tell!

Recruiter: "Are either of you homosexual?"

Winger: "You mean like... flaming?"

Recruiter: "It's a standard question..."

(Winger and Russell share a loving glance)

Russell: "No, we're not homosexuals, but we are willing to learn."

Winger: "Would they send us someplace special for that?"

(STRIPES, of course)

[Ilsa]

8. I heard that some of that was ad libbed.

Those two were geniuses in these movies (Ghostbusters).

[WillyT]

3. How 'bout We Say We're All Gay, Muslim, Women !!!

We all go in in Burkahs, and they'll never know!



:shrug:

[Newsjock]

4. When the draft starts ...

... gay will suddenly be quite OK with the powers that be. You can probably even deep-kiss the induction officer and not get kicked out, because every sensitive straight guy will try the same thing.

[personman]

5. Good idea, but they are getting desperate...

May have to up the ante. They will probably just say "well just don't tell anyone your gay, its cool."

So you may have to say something like "but you don't underthtand...I'm like pink tank-top belly shirt boa gay"
(shit looks fuckin hot with cammo pants)

and they will be all like "oh ok, next..."
or they will smile and ask you out.





disclaimer: Please don't be offended, I'm not trying to make fun of gays. I don't take myself seriously enough that I think I'm better then anyone for any reason. I know I'm a douche =).

[Guckert]

6. We all know the GOP cowards will be coming out of the closet faster

Than a Washington Mayor.

[atreides1]

7. Because

You'll have to prove it.

Just like you'll have to prove that you are sincere about CO status.

Besides being gay isn't one of the classifications listed.

[HawkerHurricane]

9. Because it won't matter.

They'll think you're lying, take you in anyway, and then at the end of your enlistment (the real end, after all the extends) they'll out you and OTH you so you get no bennies.

[Warpy]

10. Back in the day, you had to do more than claim it

A goodbye soul kiss from a trusted friend just inside the building where your draft physical was being done would do it.

If you just said you were gay, they sent you to a shrink.

[gmoney]

11. "And if TWO people do it..."

"If two people walk in, sing a couple bars of 'Alice's Restaurant'... in harmony... and walk out... they'll think they're both faggots and they won't take either of 'em."

-- Arlo Guthrie, Alice's Restaurant