So, my sister-in-law gives my son a Walmart gift card!

[demgurl]

If you have read my posts before, you will know I am very much anti-Walmart as anyone with a conscience here is. My sister-in-law and I have had major differences in the past and she frequents quiet a few boards that I do - although not this one. I have made my feelings very well known on all the boards I have been to and have no doubt that she has crossed paths with my comments.

My son's birthday was about a month ago and my sister-in-law is notorious for giving gift cards. She wrote to me asking what kind of gift card he would like for his birthday and the choices I gave her (an exact copy and paste from my email) were:

I am not sure XXXX would enjoy Paypal or a web certificate at his age. I am just not sure he would find as much pleasure at seeing items online as he would possibly shopping in person at say EB Games, Game Stop, Toys 'R' Us or even Target - no Walmart, we do not like supporting them.

So not only has she possibly read posts I have done but I told her in an email that we do NOT want Walmart. Well, hubby came back the other day with the gift and it was a Walmart gift card. I am so upset. I honestly think this was given to me on purpose. She knows I do not like her boyfriend and I have called DSS on his abusing her sons. On my other son's last birthday she wrote it was from all of them including her boyfriend's name. I called her on it and she said it was just something she write and it was not really from him. Now she comes off with this. Does Walmart give refunds on gift cards? This is so unacceptable. I am fuming. I feel like she is playing games with me but now it includes supporting a business that no one should buy from and it is being done in my kid's name!

Maybe I am blowing this all out of proportion but I specifically do not want to send any business to Walmart and am horrified that this happened. Thanks for letting me vent.

[friesianrider]

1. Well...

Considering WM already has the $$, you may as well use it since I am pretty sure they do not accept returns.

That being said, it is strange she gave you exactly what you said youdidn't want. Methinks this may have been done on purpose, too.

[demgurl]

5. fries, at least it is her money and not mine going to Walmart.

I refuse to give them even one extra penny of funds from my pocket!

[friesianrider]

11. Hey, I know!

I won't go to Wal-Mart ever again. I never knew how corrupt they were until I came here and learned how horrible they actually are.

[Snotcicles]

104. Sell it to a neighbor for five dollars off face value

and give him the cash.
then call her and tell her thanks. And that those Wal-Mart gift cards have a hidden cost. When she questions you, explain it to her ALL OVER AGAIN.

[ConfuZed]

12. She was just being kind hearted don't do this to your kid...

Don't deny your kid joy and happiness because you have a personal opinion about wal-mart its no better than the crap the wing religious nuts feed their children because of their wacky opinion (Keep in mind I'm not calling your opinions wacky).

[demgurl]

20. Well the thing is, my son does not even know that he got the card!

I could throw it in the garbage (I would give it to charity before I did that)and he would never know because my husband did not show it to him, he knows how I feel. His birthday was a month ago and we just got this a few days ago. He has no idea he never even got one of his gifts.

BTW, thanks for making sure I knew you were not calling my opinions wacky, I appreciate that.

[GiovanniC]

25. All That Accomplishes Is Giving Wal-Mart Free Money

They already have the cash. It would be a big bonus for them if they did not have to exchange goods for the cash, if they just got it free and clear.

[demgurl]

33. Well I think I am going to go in and hand them a letter with my opinions..

This is so I will not leave anything off. I will tell them for those reasons I would like to exchange my gift card for money. If they say no then I will call customer service and go right on up the line. I would rather get the money from them and let them know that some of us will not spend any money there even if it is not our own money.

[ConfuZed]

72. Just let the kid choose don't try to persuade him just hand him the card

and see what he wants to do if he wants to go to wal-mart suck it up,march in and make his day better if you don't do this you won't be making a differnce because you sister has already patronized wal-mart and wal-mart wins if you let this card remain stagnant.

[Scout1071]

43. Just my two cents, but I'd let the kid have the gift card.

Like a previous poster said, don't hurt the kid. Yea, your sister in law is a major asshole for doing that on purpose, but at least she got him a gift. Let him spend the card, but go with him and gently explain to him why WalMart sucks arse.

[demgurl]

47. Scout, I would rather hurt them in the pocketbook.

This card is money that they have already counted as being spent in their store. Of course this is my child's gift and I do not want to punish him, but he can have the money and spend it elsewhere.

I can use this as a lesson to tell him you should stand up for other people when they are being hurt and not only when it hurts you. If I tell him Walmart sucks but I still spend the card there he will get mixed signals. That will not teach him what morals are about. I will teach him that morals are something you live by and do even if it is a little inconvenient. I am really trying to raise democrats!

[northzax]

91. actually, they can't book it as revenue

gift cards are off the books until they are spent or expire (and then they go into 'other assets' The store cannot count the amount as 'revenue' for accounting purposes until someone exchanges it for goods.

minor technicality, but an important one. Having managed a retail store, gift cards can be a pain in the ass sometimes, we'd take in thousands of dollars in cash over the holidays, but that didn't change my numbers until it was redeemed.

[Proud2BAmurkin]

48. give son money to cover card, then use it to buy a PRO LIBERAL book. Then

then thank them for the PRO LIBERAL BOOK every time you see them

[Kber]

90. I disagree

If she can get a refund, she can use the money to buy a gift card at another store, for example. (Nice if she let her sister-in-law know that she "fixed" her "mistake" too.)

Depending on his age (my son in 8)it could even be an exercise in social activism and a powerful lesson that even spending a few dollars in the right or wrong place can make a difference and is worth the effort.

But every kid is different - my son would understand, but he's old enough to begin to realize that our everyday actions have an impact. Some kids just aren't ready for that message yet - which is fine too.

[Yupster]

55. How charitable can your mind get?

Maybe your sister just picked up your note for a second after a long time, saw Walmart as the last word, and rushed over there on the way to somewhere else.

That may be an awful lot of benefitting for an awful little doubt to give her, but I'd give her the benefit of the doubt anyway just to avoid a fight over very little.

[demgurl]

61. Yupster....

I owe a lot to my sister-in-law. The ongoing feud with her really hurt our family relations. I always marveled at people who had a family member murdered and they somehow found forgiveness. I never thought my mind could ever be that charitable.

About every six months I pick a characteristic I do not like about myself and I try to work on it for the next six months. About two years ago my sister-in-law was in a car accident that was almost fatal. She was in I.C.U. and they were not sure if she would survive. My husband came home and was completely upset. I sat at the table and told him that if she was in that much pain then maybe she should just be put out of her misery. He could not believe I said that and I told him that, from her actions, she would wish nothing less for me. He agreed but was still upset.

I decided this was a time to work on that aspect of my personality. I worked through it as best as I could and finally came to the conclusion that whatever bad blood had passed between us, my sister-in-law had tones of family who would be upset if she passed and I should wish nothing but good things for her on that alone.

I stepped up to the plate and made her a HUGE get well basket. When she got out of hospital I offered her rides to therapy. I brought her muffins. I did everything I could and finally found peace within myself. I really found forgiveness and have tried hard to keep it ever since. I still write her monthly emails asking how she is.

Yes, she may have glanced over the email. I guess I have felt bad feelings from her escalating for a while now. I am not sure what made them reemerge but that is what made me suspect that she did not pay attention to the email. I have supplied the rest of the paragraph somewhere in this thread.

It is kind of like the time her boyfriend sent out an answer to an email called something like 'Getting To Know You'. It is the only time he has ever sent ANYTHING to my husband or myself. This time he sent out the exact same email to us twice and there is no doubt when he said "32. Who will respond to this email the quickest? Don't remember it's name. But it's fat and frumpy and keeps it's husband's penis hermetically sealed in a specimen jar." He was referring to my husband and myself. When my husband wrote to his sister, she did not say he was sorry or that it was a mistake, she only replied that she was not there when he wrote it.

I am charitable and gave her the benefit of the doubt by not immediate writing to her and basting her out. I do owe her because her experience is what helped me improve as a person. I will say that my heart is saddened because she has given me cause to believe that she did it on purpose.

I will not start a fight because I did promise my husband. I will let her know that she mistakenly gave me the card and not to worry that I took care of the refund. If it was an honest mistake she will be glad that it was taken care of. If she did it on purpose, she will see that I did not let her get away with it.

[MountainLaurel]

88. Don't throw it out

Give it to a women's shelter so that at least someone can take advantage of your SIL being an asshat.

[mcar]

101. This is a good idea

Better yet, donate the card to a liberal organization, then send your SIL a nice note thanking her for the gift, and telling her that your son decided against making a purchase at WM and telling her who you gave it to.

Then, give you son the cash value of the card so he can get himself something nice.

[FreedomAngel82]

32. I agree

She gave the card and whether or not she did it on purpose only she knows. I would let your kid have the card and get what the kid can with it since it is their birthday and you're not paying for it. ;) So it's a treat. I'm not fond of how Walmart is either but it'd be a waste of money.

[demgurl]

67. Freedom, rather than wasting the card....

someone here has suggested that I can, at least, buy something and return it for a refund. That will make sure Walmart does not get the money but that my son will get to go to Toys 'R' Us and pick out a gift.

It is my son's gift and he will benefit in some way from it but I do not think it is good for him to benefit at Walmart.

[Walt Starr]

85. Bullcrap, she was being mean spirited and used this child to do it!

I'd go to Target, get a gift card of equivalent value, and give that to the kid, then destroy the WalMart gift card. Furthermore, I would cut that woman off from my children forever. No seeing them. No correspondence. Nothing.

[demgurl]

89. Walt, she really does not see them as it is.

The only time she sees them is at family gatherings which might be once a month with the number of birthdays we have in the family.

The final straw, for me, was on the 8th time we called DSS on her. That was to be the final time since they always covered their tracks and threatened the kids to say nothing ever happened. I got the name of a teacher who suspected my sister-in-law's kids were being abused by her boyfriend. I canvassed her neighborhood and took names and numbers of the witnesses of child abuse. I even wrote letters to every government official I could find in the state. I was fed up with DSS doing nothing. Six days after the last time I called DSS, they showed up at my door to investigate us from an 'anonymous tip'! To this day my husband and I both know who the 'anonymous person' is even if they deny it. I do not let her near my children at any of the family functions. Just to let you know, DSS found nothing wrong with my kids or family. It was an eye for an eye move by my sister-in-law.

At the last family function her boyfriend came up and tried mental games to intimidate me. He hates me as much as I hate him and he has even told her I am not allowed in their house - we do not get invited to family functions if it is at their place, that is what happened last Thanksgiving. Anyway, the cad comes over and sits down right next to me and tries to intimidate me. I had a cold at the time and just kept coughing on him hoping he might end up sick. Every time I see him he seems to become more and more bold about trying his intimidation techniques. He is such a jerk.

Anyway, she comes to family functions but I keep my kids far away from her.

[July]

95. Under the circumstances, I would return the card.

Even if she simply misread the email. The fact is that she did one of two things: either she asked for information from you that she then didn't really read; or she read the information SHE requested and decided to manipulate you and/or piss you off.

My response would be: "I don't know if you realize that when YOU asked for suggestions, I specifically mentioned that Walmart was something Son would NOT want. Since our family refuses to support Walmart, I am returning the card to you, and you can use the money you've already spent on it to shop there if you like. I won't be giving it to Son."

You can explain to Son, and my guess is that he will understand that SIL is either too lazy to read or actively trying to force you to shop at a Walmart. It's not up to you to replace the money, either (IMO). If SIL really wants to be nice to Son, she'll be nice to him and not offer a gift with a vindictive "message." If she complains about now having to spend more money on an appropriate gift, remind her that she could have avoided the problem by READING THE ANSWER TO THE QUESTION SHE POSED. Also tell her it's not necessary to give a gift to Son. Again, just my opinion, and here's one more: run far away from these toxic people.

[demgurl]

97. July, I can not put a 5 year old in the middle of a family war.

I think my best recourse is to try and by merchandise and then get a refund with which I will bring my son to a proper store. I will not pointedly tell him that his Aunt gave us the card to Walmart but I will say that we were given it and that the person did not know how bad Walmart is. I will explain to him why we do not buy from Walmart and how important it is to stand up for what you believe in even if it inconveniences you.

I will wait a few days after Walmart and I will tell him his aunt gave us money to go to Toys 'R' Us. I will take him and he can thank her for the toy but I will not have him mention where we got it from.

I will write her an email that will go something like this:

Dear XXXX,

I received your birthday gift for XXXX and wanted to thank you. It is always nice when people think of us and that is even more so with a child.

I did want to quickly mention the email I sent with suggestions. I know we all get busy at times and just glance over emails. I know you are especially busy going to school and holding down your regular job and interning for school. Wow! I noticed that the gift card was Walmart. I had actually mentioned, in my email, that we do not support Walmart at all.

I would like you to read up on Walmart and I am providing a few links at the bottom of this email. You are very up to date on information and I am sure you have peripherally heard the reasons why you should not shop at Walmart including running smaller places out of business and how poorly they treat their own workers.

This is not just another cause for me, it is so much more personal then that. Walmart refuses to carry the morning after pill and since I am a rape victim I take great offense at that. But please do not think me selfish because I also boycott them for the way they treat others in the community.

This email was not sent to make you feel bad about mistakenly giving us the Walmart card. I actually wanted you not to worry and know it has all been taken care of. We did manage to get a refund for the gift card and I took XXXX to Toys 'R' Us to get his gift. He does not even realize you gave us the Walmart gift card. It did come at a very opportune time though. XXXX is old enough to start understanding how actions effect others than himself. I did tell him 'someone' gave us the gift card and I used the card as a tool to teach him why we should shop at some places and not others. Do not worry, I never mentioned your name at all in connection with the Walmart card, he only knows you gave us money to shop at Toys 'R' Us.

Anyway, thanks once again for the gift and it ended up being a bigger present than you could possible realize. It ended up giving my son a lesson on morals, boycotting and supporting your community. That is a much better gift than anyone else had given him.

Hugs,

XXXXX

So that is a basic outline with which I will tweak it here and there. I think this approach will benefit everyone concerned and perhaps it may even make her think twice about needlessly spending money at Walmart.

[GiovanniC]

98. I Think That's an Excellent Way to Handle It n/t

[demgurl]

100. Thanks, Giovanni. I hope it does not come off as self- righteous

or putting her down in any way. I tried to be as nice as I possibly could but still get the message across that we do not do Walmart.

[July]

99. You should do what you think is best.

I wouldn't want your child in the middle of it. I didn't know whether he even knew about the gift, but even in that case, I would probably tell my child that "Auntie made a little mistake, but she wishes you a happy birthday." It's not all about the gifts, and I got the impression that SIL is trying to use your child against you because she disagrees with your politics. I may be wrong, though.

That said, it's your life and your child, and you can, should, and will make the best judgment for your situation. I posted what I would do because I've dealt with some world-class manipulators, and Auntie is at least a trainee; I'm a little intolerant of snark attacks.

Your letter is very nice and very generous. If you are able to do what you mention in it, your son will be protected by you (good mom) from someone else's games, and you make your point to him and to the aunt. I don't think I would have been so nice after saying, "please, no Walmart." So you are a much bigger person than I am.

Keep us posted. I hope you will get through to her. My own experience makes me cynical on that point, but perhaps your "benefit of the doubt" approach will help her save face and at least back off from the games.

Best of luck.

[Maru Kitteh]

107. BRAVO! Your email is a perfect example of family diplomacy

and an excellent lesson in how to be the bigger person. Kudos to you! :applause:

[eleny]

2. Don't you just hate it when...

you feel that you should be polite to someone who refuses to have respect for your values?

[demgurl]

8. Eleny....

Yes, I hate that we are the 'good' guys and act so with other people even when they act like this to us. If it were not my husband's sister and if I had not already stirred so many controversies with my standing up for values in this family, I would drop her so quickly.

[kaitykaity]

3. Lots more going on than Wal-Mart.

If you can afford it, donate the card to like a food bank
for Wal-Mart employees who are on food stamps and then get
the kid a gift yourself.

She's trying to push your buttons. Dont, don't, don't
react to it. Smile and tell her what you did if she
askes and then just make light of it.

If she has any soul at all, it'll make her feel small.
A peach, your sis.

[demgurl]

10. kaity....

I may have to donate it but even then the money is still going to Walmart and that is what I hate most. Whatever I ever do, I will only say 'thank you' to her. I will not stoop to her level and try to push her buttons. That is what makes us the good guys. I refuse to get muck all over me.

[kaitykaity]

21. good for you.

I come from a button-pushing family myself, and it took
me years and years to learn how not to react.

I think it's poetic justice sort of that a Wal-Mart
employee in need of assistance because of the crappy
wages would get to use that card.

Of course, you could be sly and go at her sideways.
She doesn't sound very sophisticated I'm sure there's
something that drives her nuts that you could do and
then play innocent about. As a last resort I mean.

:evilgrin:

[Yupster]

57. It's her money going to Walmart,

not yours.

Regardless of what you think of Walmart, other people have the right to spend their money there.

[demgurl]

92. Yupster....

It is her money but I also politely asked her for no Walmart cards when she asked me what would be an appropriate card to get for my son. I was not crude and I did not shove politics in her face. And I have strong personal feelings against them since I am a former rape victim and they refuse to carry the morning after pill. That is more personal than what most people have against them. By doing this it was a big, "Fuck you, I do not care if you were raped and why you do not like Walmart, I am buying a card there anyway." Maybe she did not think about it that way, but that is the way it is.

[AllyCat]

73. Yeah, but this way, Wal-Mart has to feed one of its own employees

Their folks are really suffering in many places. Give it to them for food. Wal-Mart pays.

[Straight Shooter]

4. Give him a gift card of equal value from elsewhere, donate hers to charity

And let her know that's what you did, and thank her for being so kind to the poor.

[knitter4democracy]

87. That's a good idea!

I was thinking along the same lines. I'm sure that charities would accept something like that--like military families left behind--and then you have the best of both options.

Even better, let him pick where to donate it.

[cynatnite]

6. I don't know if you can get a refund on it

But it was insensitive on her part to go against your wishes. You were very specific.

I'm not a person who believes in offending someone just because they offended you, but in this case it's fine. Give the card back to her and tell her that you do not support Walmart. It probably will offend her and she might even say you're a horrible person for denying your son his birthday gift. :eyes: Your son probably won't suffer much over it.

If she valued your feelings about this she would never have done it in the first place.

I would return the card.

On edit: Yeah, giving it to charity is a much better idea.

[demgurl]

17. cynatnite....

I have caused much anger and hurt feelings in this family already. It all started when I begged everyone to confront her and say her boyfriend was not allowed to abuse her boys any more or she would not be welcome at family functions. They all turned on us even when I offered to give them the phone numbers of witnesses who saw the boys being abused. For almost two years we did not go to any family functions. We are only now back to normal.

I do not think she ever forgave me for canvassing her neighborhood when one of her sons told her the neighborhood kids had been a witness. I took names and numbers and the parents of these kids agreed to let me give the information to the authorities.

My husband has only asked that I act civil toward his family and I made that promise to him. I am afraid I can not confront her even if I would like to. He has even blown this whole thing off as a mistake. (can you say co-dependent?)

[cynatnite]

24. She knew she could do it and get away with it from the sounds of it

Your husband doesn't want to rock the boat and in the process it leaves you impotent when something like this happens. He doesn't want to be put in a position of choosing sides. He doesn't want anymore family battles.

I've been there with my husband's family. I was a pariah for almost five years because of it and we almost divorced.

Any chance of your husband giving it back to her? Or perhaps just donating it? Maybe your son can pick who he would like to give it to?

Also, it is your son's gift. Is he old enough to understand your feelings on the matter? Can he decide what to do with it?

[demgurl]

36. cyna, my son is 5.

I am not sure he can understand anything. My husband purposely kept it from him that he got this card. I know it is his gift but he also does not understand the implications of a gift and everything behind him receiving that particular gift and how he is being used to press Mommy's buttons.

My husband would NEVER rock the boat by giving it back and he is sure this is all just a mistake. He said I should talk to her about it but she will just say that it was a mistake and she must have misread the email and then the ball is back in my court again!

The charity sounds good but I would like to just get the money back so that I can spend it elsewhere. I think I am going to fight them tooth and nail to get a refund.

[Yupster]

59. I'd say

leave her son out of this.

It's bad enough they're fighting without getting the next generation choosing sides too.

[cynatnite]

62. That wasn't my intention

I was not aware of his age. I have a six year old and a fourteen year old. I wouldn't leave it for the six year old, but I would the fourteen year old.

[demgurl]

64. cyna....

I know I did not divulge his age and that is why I answered you and gave it. I believe you have age appropriate actions for a 6 and 14 year old. Wow, one is a teen and the other barely in school! Different ages do have to be handled differently. I think we both agree.

[cynatnite]

65. Yep, we do

:)

I wish you the best of luck on this.

[demgurl]

66. Yupster....

I am not one to put the kids in the middle of a fight. We even use initials if the kids are around and we are talking about ANY grown up they know. I have corrected my husband when he has started to use names when saying something bad about his family. We are very careful and realize they do not need to be caught up in anything.

[Lautremont]

7. Give it to the last person Wal-Mart wants in their store.

The stinkiest, jeezliest old bum you can find.

[Dora]

93. That's a super idea!

I'll do just what you suggest, if I'm ever given a walmart giftcard.

[SW FL Dem]

9. I would save the card and give it back to her

at the next gift giving time. Give your son the money to spend at a store you approve of.

[GodHelpUsAll2]

13. Got to WalMart

Buy stuff with the card. The next day, return it. Send the cash to the abused women and children's shelter. Or the DNC. Then send her a thank you card and tell her what you did.

I am just spiteful that way.

When I got the $400.00 loan with interest check (sold to the public as a tax refund) for having a dependent child. I deposited it. made a $300.00 donation to the DNC (I used 100.00 for us to have a decent dinner out) then sent a letter to the white house thanking them for allowing me to have the money to support the Democrats.

edited for typos

[cynatnite]

15. Great idea on the note to the WH!

That's hilarious.

I think Walmart knows if you've used their card to buy something. It'd probably get credited back to you rather than get cash.

[GodHelpUsAll2]

19. Actually

I don't think so. It IS cash. Not credit. It has been bought and paid for. I got a SAMS gift card at Christmas. Went in, bought a slice of pizza and a coke at the deli, strolled out with my $47 and change in cash.

[demgurl]

29. GodHelpUs.....

You are too cool giving the money to the DNC. That was really wonderful. I do not think I will ever tell her what I do with the card or money because it would add fuel to the family feud and she has really tried to paint me in a bad light already.

I actually found the email just to read what I told her to give my son and did not read any further, here is the rest of the paragraph:

no Walmart, we do not like supporting them. Not only do they run smaller businesses out of business but they refuse to carry the morning after pill which really can impact someone who has been brutally raped. They can have their beliefs but I do not have to support them in any way!!!

I made my intentions clear in no uncertain terms. The gall of some people!

[NuttyFluffers]

83. :D i like your style. here's what i'd do.

take your son out on a trip on the finer arts of "messin" with a store without actually causing damage:

- grab a shopping cart and fill it with random stuff. preferrably put the raw meat and vegetables hidden in a big batch of clothes with heavy items atop, pressing ever so firmly. this is called "absentmindedness" if anyone asks why.

- as you go through the aisle, enjoy the fun game of ridiculing all products in the store. make it an art, reward the best use of alliteration or creative analogies. point out osha safety violations. be sure to be loud enough to be overheard.

- randomly put stuff in cart and then place it on another shelf, far, far away. don't feel bad. i've been a clerk, and i can tell you i'd arrange shelves in a heartbeat than deal with customers. think of it as giving tired employees a much needed break from sunzabitch customers.

- leave your shopping cart, filled with random stuff, somewhere in a dark, lone part in the back of the store. take what small items you were going to buy this time to the register by hand.

- preferrably have 1 small item that your child wants, like bubble gum, and at least 4-9 more objects that you don't want. purchase with card. come back in a minute and return 2-3 products. leave. come back a few minutes later (after people watching with a snarky attitude) to return another 2-3 products. keep repeating until all but original item is returned and you get your money back. tell your son it's his "reward for punishing wal-mart allowance."

- then offer money on top of what the gift certificate is so your child can have a nice gift. be sure to squeeze almost all of the money out of the card. keep purchases down to a few jolly ranchers or chiclets.

then go to the movies and make a special time of the rest of your day! :D make it like "family time" to go rag on your favorite love-to-hate shopping place. the family that bonds together grows together. :evilgrin:

[BattyDem]

14. I would send the card back to her ...

and tell her that if she can't respect your wishes, then she should refrain from sending him anything in the future.

Of course, your son will be upset for having his gift returned. If it were me, I'd just give him the money to replace it. It would be worth it just so I didn't have to take him to that damn store!

[OldLeftieLawyer]

16. A suggestion

When it's time for you to get your sister-in-law a gift, might I recommend you making a donation to the ACLU in her honor?

[GodHelpUsAll2]

23. Now that's a good one

I think for all of my Republican family members I will make donations to Gay Rights and Pro-Choice organizations in their names.


I love it!

[stevans_41902]

27. YES, you CAN get your money back...

I went to a small womans college last year and the year before and we would ALWAYS get a ton of wal mart gift cards from the organization that supported us. (wal mart cleared the downtown and closed down most of the grocery stores since they put in their ugly supercenter.) Well, a couple times we got huge gift cards and just wanted to split the cash so we bought something at wal mart that was the same value as the gift card and then returned it as customer service the next day and got our cash back! Thats definately what I would do...I have refused to shop there since I read "How wal mart is destroying america and the world" and found out about their pac money to Bush. Good luck - there are just people out there who refuse to see wal mart as anything but a pro-american wonderland. my bf's mother buys almost everything at wal mart/sams club, and says things like "every company has to make a profit - they are not doing anything wrong" when i say anything bad about wal mart. she also can't see why I spend more money on american made jeans when I could be buying $15 ones at walmart. Its always those people who wear their patriotism on their sleeve who act like they would die for wal mart.

[demgurl]

37. stevans....

I will make sure that is still their policy and then I can buy something and I could even return it right then and there! I will wait a day or two as not to cause trouble for anyone who may be in the same boat in the future and want a refund.

I can not believe the attitude some people have toward Walmart. They can have their opinions but why must it be pushed on the rest of us?

Thank you for the information - you just cost Walmart some money.

[BattyDem]

42. LOL ... that's brilliant!

:toast:

[stevans_41902]

28. YES, you CAN get your money back...

I went to a small womans college last year and the year before and we would ALWAYS get a ton of wal mart gift cards from the organization that supported us. (wal mart cleared the downtown and closed down most of the grocery stores since they put in their ugly supercenter.) Well, a couple times we got huge gift cards and just wanted to split the cash so we bought something at wal mart that was the same value as the gift card and then returned it as customer service the next day and got our cash back! Thats definately what I would do...I have refused to shop there since I read "How wal mart is destroying america and the world" and found out about their pac money to Bush. Good luck - there are just people out there who refuse to see wal mart as anything but a pro-american wonderland. my bf's mother buys almost everything at wal mart/sams club, and says things like "every company has to make a profit - they are not doing anything wrong" when i say anything bad about wal mart. she also can't see why I spend more money on american made jeans when I could be buying $15 ones at walmart. Its always those people who wear their patriotism on their sleeve who act like they would die for wal mart.

[OldLeftieLawyer]

96. Good, GOOD, GOOD!!!!!

Working the system, baby, and, in the process, taking away even a little something from WalMart. GOOD ON YOU!!!

[cynatnite]

31. Excellent Idea!

I love it!

[David Zephyr]

18. Think of the joy you will have by telling her that you...

1.) took cash for it and shopped elsewhere,
2.) gave it to a progressive non-profit organization that she would not approve of,
3.) purchased a progressive book at WM with it.

The balls in your court and you can now have a lot of fun with her "gift". Let us know what you do.

[demgurl]

38. David....a thought......

I do not have to throw it in her face that I did this, but I can handle it another way. I can buy something and get a refund. I can then go to Toys 'R' Us and get something cool for my child. When I get home I can write my sister-in-law an email stating something to the effect that I did not want to embarrass her because I am sure she missed it in the email that I did not want Walmart - I can even give a quote from the email. I will say I did not want to cause her any trouble of getting a different gift card for my son and so I just got a refund and went to another store. I will let her know what my son picked out.

At least this way it is being nice but at the same time I am letting her know my buttons were not pushed and the money did not go to a business I did not want to endorse. I think this is a gentle way to handle it all. I hope so anyway.

[David Zephyr]

103. Well, that would certainly be more graceful

and would still leave her wondering. It's a wonder I even have friends, huh? You way is much better. Perhaps I'll seek you guidance in the future.

[newswolf56]

22. Make it a learning opportunity for your son. Get...

...the name of the union that is trying to organize Wal-Mart (sorry I'm having a senior moment: can't think which one) and see if you can donate the card to the union's treasury. If that is impossible, return the card to your sister-in-law. Explain to your son the whys and wherefores of what you are doing in terms appropriate to his age. Tell your sister-in-law how you reacted and why: a suitable analogy might be to note the similarities between a Wal-Mart gift card given to a family of progressives and a Nazi war bond given to a Jewish family. Then replace the gift with something suitable for your son.

That's what I'd do -- but then I come from a viciously dysfunctional family -- so maybe my advice is worse than worthless.

[demgurl]

40. news, I appreciate any and all adivice.

No advice is worthless. I am not sure I can explain to a very immature 5 year old about Walmart. In fact, he is not spoiled but I think he would cry that he could not have his gift because he would not truly understand why he could not.

I may explain to him that Walmart is a very bad place and they do not treat their workers well. We will get a refund and go to a store where he can truly enjoy his present.

I will not deprive my child of a gift since it was meant for him, but what I can do is take money out of my own pocket and try to figure out a creative way to just deal another small punch to Walmart. It may be a donation to a union or it could be something else if I can get creative.

[GiovanniC]

26. Just Think of It This Way

She COULD have purchased him a present at Wal-Mart. Instead of giving him a gift card from there, she could have just purchased his gift there. She's already given them the money... the kid might as well get something out of it.

[stevans_41902]

34. she knows your request and wants to see if you will stand up to her

or just give in and use the gift card. do something so she sees once and for all that you wont tolerate her behavior.

[demgurl]

44. stevens...

I can stand up to her in a nice way by letting her know about her 'oversight' and saying I did not want to put her out by asking for a different card so I went and got a refund and went elsewhere. I will not have her opinions and vindictiveness shoved down my throat.

[noamnety]

30. call their customer service number

1-800-966-6546 and ask which states allow you to get a cash refund for a gift card.

from their website:
"Electronic and plastic gift cards: Not returnable or refundable for cash, except in states where required by law."

[demgurl]

46. Thanks for the number, I will call tomorrow to see.

[Catherine Vincent]

35. Let your son use the card. The money is already spent.

But what you should also do is send a note to your s-i-l and thank her for the card although you specifically told her no walmart cards. And then tell her that you sold it to someone for the value of the card and donated the money to your local democratic party. You'd be lying but she doesn't have to know. :evilgrin:

[demgurl]

41. cat_girl, how I wish I wish I could do that.

I have promised my hubby I would be very cordial to his family and not cause any more problems. I would love nothing more than to do that but can not. That does not mean I can not kill her with kindness. Just like she can act innocent about buying the card (IE. I just glanced over it and missed where you said no Walmart card), I can also act innocent and tell her I felt it must have been a mistake and not to worry - I corrected it by getting a refund and going to Toy 'R' Us. The only thing she can 'innocently' reply to that is how sorry she is. Then she is put on alert and can not 'innocently' give us one in the future.

[Al-CIAda]

39. I had a simiar experience. I refused the card and stated my reasons.

Let your convictions be your guide. I will not set foot in Wal-Mart.

[demgurl]

45. Al-CIAda.....

I will not spend the money there. I will do as others suggested and if they do not give refunds on cards I will buy something and get a refund on that. This will cost them $25 that they had before and counted as money in the bank. At least I can hurt them a little. I will not let go of my convictions for this.

[insane_cratic_gal]

49. Gift Card exchange

try this so you don't have suffer through it!

http://www.swapagift.com/

[demgurl]

53. insane....

I appreciate this. If I somehow do not get a refund then I will go with this option. I would rather get a refund because that takes the money away from Walmart. If I exchange it they still get the money.

That is a very neat site. I have bookmarked it.

DU has such a wealth of information to offer. I am proud to me a member.

[insane_cratic_gal]

60. Another link just incase

I didn't see much in the way of walmart cards but here is another site just incase the first one bellies up on you

http://www.cardavenue.com/default.cfm?

they deal with target cards, so they should deal with walmart ones. Over all it might not be worth it at all, but for future reference should she insist on walmart (everytime)

Also for my daughter who is 7.. we get alot of target cards.. I love target but they are red donator (worse then walmart) until they 50/50 their donations or 0 them I refuse to buy there. So to get my inlaws from sending those cards for events, i created my daughter an online wishlist for Border books or amazon.com wishlist. They can just go right online and place an order. Or give her a giftcard toward purchases online.

[dweller]

50. in that situation...

i'd use it to buy a case of TP from upagainsttheWalmart. And then spend the same amount on the kid at his choice of stores.

and then use a few rolls to teepee the sil's house.

but that's just me.
dp

[BlueStateGirl]

51. Sell it on ebay! Donate the money to a progressive candidate.

[demgurl]

56. At first I was very excited about giving to a charity....

but now I have to backtrack on that. It is my son's gift so he should benefit from it. I think I will give a small donation to charity with my own money and my son will shop at Toys 'R' Us.

[BlueStateGirl]

58. Good idea.

[Proud2BAmurkin]

52. Here are a few PRO LIBERAL items you can use it for at Walmart

Get your son a toys r us gift card of the same value then use the Wal Mart to buy one of the following. Mention the book EVERY time you see your in law

"My Life" by Bill Clinton

http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.gsp?product_id=2666356

"Living History"

"The Clinton Wars"

"The Right Wing Noise Machine"

[demgurl]

70. Maybe she will get one of these books for Christmas!

[warrens]

54. Sell it back to the bitch for 75 cents on the dollar

Then spend the rest at target. And make up the difference. And let them see how much you hate those pricks. And that repuke fuck, too. Fuck her. My brothers have all come around and admitted they were wrong. Make her tell you and your kid just why it was right to lie us into a war, and how it is OK that thousands of our kids are dead or maimed because of that cocksucker punk fuckwad fake president.

[demgurl]

69. Warrens...

She would never buy it back and it would only cause a bigger rift within the family. My husband would never forgive me if I did that and I do respect him. I think I may take the path of least resistance and get the card refunded via a purchase.

[LeftyMom]

63. Here's what I would do

Either go in and buy stuff they lose money on or give it to somebody who will do the same. Teachers would be a good choice, they always need more supplies and the deep discount school supply sales are coming up. I'm pretty sure mao mart isn't making any money on folders that cost a nickel and packs of lined paper for a quarter.

My in-laws do the same thing, but in thier case it's just because they don't have the same stores as where we live, for the most part, so if they want to send a gift card, they're stuck with mao mart or ToysRLoud.

[demgurl]

68. LeftyMom....

I do have to let my child have something for his gift so a wonderful person, above, has stated that I can buy an item and return it for cash. If the gift was meant only for me then I could do what I wanted with it but it was meant for my son so he needs to get something for his birthday. We can take the refund money and go to the store of his choice and what better thing can a 6 year old wish for?

[LeftyMom]

71. I think they'll just give you store credit (another gift card)

unless you have a receipt showing you paid cash/check/charge. I do agree he should definitely get the value of his gift, I didn't mean to suggest you rip him off. :)

[demgurl]

76. LeftyMom....

I never took it as trying to rip him off. I will call customer service tomorrow and see what they say about the matter. If I will only get another gift card back then it will be a whole different story. I will see what happens tomorrow.

[Iris]

105. This could be a good time to teach your son a hard lesson in

sticking by your beliefs.

I know it sounds harsh and he's only 6, but if he knows how you feel about Wal-Mart, it's time to stick to your guns.

Speaking of which, if she gave your son a bb gun and you didn't approve, would you let him keep it?

[SoCalDem]

74. Use the card to buy stuff for a homeless shelter...deduct it

then give your son the cash equivalent, and let him buy what he wants..where he wants..

Write her a pleasant thank you , and just tell her that a generous donation to a homeless shelter was the outcome of her generosity. If it's a shelter that houses people she particularly dislikes, thsat would be a bonus :evilgrin:..

You get a donation, she gets pissed and your son still gets a gift..from YOU...

It's a win win

[demgurl]

78. Well Walmart still gets the money that way.

If I can, I would like to take it away from them completely. She is not all that against shelters and the like because she was an addict (crack) at one point and she mentors others who have had drug addictions. She has even brought them into her house for the holidays. One Christmas she asked the family if she could bring someone to our family Christmas celebration and the majority said no because it was a private family gathering. She showed up and hour later (all of us had to wait on her) and she showed up with the person! No apology ever given and none demanded. She would get a kick out of me donating to a shelter rather than even spending it at Walmart.

Another thing is we do not have a lot of extra cash right now. My husband is about to start a new job and his next paycheck will be in the middle of AUGUST! We must make do with our bank account until then.

I think the best thing is to try my darnedest to get a refund for the card or a purchase I make. I am really hoping that will work.

[SoCalDem]

79. The problem is, they GOT the money when she gave it to them

Contrary to what some others have said, they will most likely NOT give you a cash refund if your receipt says how you paid for it..

If it says CASH, they will, but if it says credit, GC or check, you will probably just get a store credit.:(


Good luck with your dilemma.. If she did it to "get your goat", she succeeded because of the fretting she has caused you to do..

I missed the age of your son..If he's young, I would just lwt it go, and be thankful that he got an extra gift. He will learn about the evils of walmart from you in due time, but for now.....

[nadinbrzezinski]

81. They already have it

have you ever bought a gift card anyhwere? You pay in advance...

[bluestateguy]

75. The damage is already done

Gift cards are usually not refundable. I would just let the boy use the card. Wal-Mart has already gotten their money, and if you don't use the card they win because they will have turned a 100% profit, not having lost any merchandise. Tell your sister you are very disappointed in her, but don't drag your son into this squabble if you can.

[demgurl]

77. bluestateguy.....

the damage can be undone IF I can get a refund. I will not deprive my son though, he will get a gift of some kind. Someone above said they are refundable sometimes and gave me a number to call. Another piece of advice was from someone who has received cards, made a purchase and then returned the purchase for money. If I can take this money away from Walmart I will.

[nadinbrzezinski]

80. You wong get the money back from Walmart

Like most companies, GIFT CARDS are not refundable... so they either get a 100% profit + interest or they exchange that for merchandize.. I am all about not patronizing Wally mart, but if I were in your situation I would take the kid and let him spend his card, not one cent more, at Walmart... or give it to my mother (Lord knows why she cannot see the connection of wally mart and other things... but she is in her seventies) and just give the money to Junior.

Yuio can also donate that card to a homeless shelter where they can use it for some good... adn give the money to your son.

[stevans_41902]

82. If you go to the customer service, they will prob tell you that you can't

get cash on something if you bought it with a gift card, but I've done it and have gotten cold hard cash in return w/ no questions. I don't know if this matters, but I did it in Missouri. The people working there did not look like cheery wal-mart lovers themselves (hmmm, wonder why?) and some of the people in front of me were returning huge cartloads of stuff with no questions. It prob just depends on if you get someone in customer service who believes the lie wal mart feeds them that it has moral values and cares about them. It is the mentality that wal mart (tries) to brainwash their employees into thinking. There may be something on the receipt that says it came from a gift card, but in that case I would be ready to tell the person at customer service that I got the (blender) as a gift and did not need it. I'm glad you're going to try to get the money back:)

I shop at Target as an alternative to wal-mart, and recently found out that they donate mostly to republicans. I have my reservations about shopping there now, but don't really see any other option. (when it comes to groceries Dillons(owned by Kroger) also donates 90% red. I don't know about the other grocery stores in my town and we don't have a K-Mart.

[Democrat 4 Ever]

84. I don't think WalMart will give you the money on the gift card

but you can swap it on the INTERNET with some who has a gift card they don't want. It doesn't stop WalMart from getting the money but at least you can trade with someone for a store where you like their business practices better. There are several sites set up for this. This way you don't have to go into their store and spend any time in Hell's Slave Farm.

A simple Google came up with http://www.certificateswap.com/news.cfm
but I'm sure there are many others. You might want to check that out.

*Disclaim - I've never used one of these sites so I can't vouch for them but Daughter # 2 has had good luck swapping gift cards her freeper mother-in-law gives her (kinda the same situation - ("You WILL buy from a store I like!") Just a suggestion.

[demgurl]

86. stevans....

Thanks for the info. I will try to be careful about turning in the merchandise to get my money back. Trying to get my money back is the only moral option that takes the money completely away from Walmart. I do try to shop with a conscience. That is why this is all a shame. I did not say no Walmart gift card because I just do not like their store, I said it because of their despicable business practices. If she wanted to 'get one over on me' she could have just bought an item there and laughed about it behind my back. She is not just hurting me by doing this, she is hurting tons and tons of other people as well. Shame on her.

[northzax]

94. why be so angry and let her win?

smile sweetly, give it to your son (it is his, after all) and teahc him to write thank you notes even for things he doesn't want. Tell him he can't use it, and explain why, but that he still has to write a thank you letter. it's a good lesson.

than take him out for ice cream. Show him that he is more important than petty adult issues.

the good lesson to your child is worth a hell of a lot more than the $25 to Walmart.

[EOTE]

102. You could always spend it on loss leaders.....

Walmart always has items they sell beneath the purchase price in order to draw consumers to the store (that no-good smiley face guy and all). If you pick up nothing but loss leaders, Walmart will actually lose money. Seems like a win-win. :)

[ArkDem]

106. As a person of conscience, you must give the card back.

[noamnety]

108. That is the option I'd chose

If customer service doesn't just refund the money (depending on the state laws).

But I'd do it nicely. Just send it back in a nice card, with an apology.

Dear ____,

Thanks for the card, unfortunately we won't be able to use it. I tried sending you an email to let you know we don't shop at Walmart for personal reasons, but it looks like you didn't get it. I didn't want the card to go to waste, so I'm sending it back, and I hope you can still make use of it.

Thanks for thinking of my son,

_______________


Something like that gives the whole family a graceful way out - it's nonconfrontational, because you give her an out (perhaps she didn't get the email). And at the same time it's clear you won't compromise your principles. And if she ever brings it up again, just smile, thank her again for thinking of you, let her know you're sorry about the misunderstanding. The trick is to not get emotionally caught up in defending your position - you don't need to defend it. Going to that store just isn't something that you do - in the same way that if somebody offered me a cigarette, I'd say no, because I don't smoke. I appreciate the offer, but I just would never take a person up on it.