There is no Mad Cow Disease in the U.S....

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

The Iraq insurgency is in its death throes,

All citizens of the world love America,

The economy has never been stronger,

Any questions are evil and unAmerican,

There's no shortage of good jobs,

Leaving our borders open only allows low wage workers in and magically filters out bad guys.

There is no global warming.

Our President is on a mission from God (cue music).

We all live in Paradise.



Take your Soma.

Now take a deep breath and repeat after me: "do you want fries with that?"

[Kipling]

1. Give Me Corporate Slavery or Give Me Death!

One Nation Under Bush, indefensible, with Liberty and Justice for Some!

[autorank]

2. A place for me: SurReality Based Thinking. Winston & I thank you!

Addendum:

Pigs live in trees.

The forefathers smoked dope.

[paineinthearse]

3. Pay no regard to that man behind the curtain!

[Bruce McAuley]

4. Freedom Fries and some reality ketchup on the side please.

Supersize that Freedom while you're at it, too!

Bruce

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

5. That's "Soma-Sized," citizen!

[lectrobyte]

6. We interrupt this program

We interrupt this program with a special bulletin:

America is now under marshall law.

All constitutional rights have been suspended.

Stay in your homes.

Do not attempt to contact love ones, insurance agents or attorneys.

Shut up.

Do not attempt to think or depression may occur.

Stay in your homes.

Curfew is at 7 PM sharp after work.

Anyone gaught outside of gates of their suveillance sectors after curfew will be shot.

Remain calm, do not panic.

Your neighborhood watchofficer will be by to collect urine examples in
the morning.

Anyone gaught intefering with the collection of urine examples will be
shot.

Stay in your homes, remain calm.

The number one enemy of progress is questioning.

National security is more important than individual will.

All sports broadcasts will proceed as normal.

No more than two people may gather anywhere without permission.

Use only the drugs proscribed by your boss or supervisor.

Shut up, be happy.

Obey all orders without question.

The conveniences you have demanded are now mandatory.

Be happy.

At last everything is done for you.

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

20. Coming soon to a reality near you! (n/t)

[KarenS]

7. Also,,,, We are fighting for peace.

And

Freedom is on the march!!

this stuff makes me crazy!!! :crazy:

[K-W]

8. There is an international terrorist conspiricy to attack us.

But its not so threatning that we have to try and stop it or anything.

[Saphire]

9. war = peace?

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

10. And "freedom isn't free."

"Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose."

[lectrobyte]

11. And the whole "we're fighting them over there, so we won't have

to fight them over here" thing makes me insane too.

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

18. That's got to be one of my favs...

Makes one wonder just how stupid a lot of people are to swollow the BS so easily.

[prole_for_peace]

19. "9/11 changed things" and all the variations.

they use that to justify ANYTHING!!

"I eat peanut m&ms for every meal because things changed with 9/11"

[catnhatnh]

12. Moo! Moo!...

...whoops-I mean-what he said...

[shadowknows69]

13. Oz is over the rainbow,

God is an astronaut and Midian is where the monsters are. It's all true.

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

14. Please... No talk about Midian, we had to move only a few years

ago and we all know what a disaster that was.

[shadowknows69]

16. Well, hopefully you and Cabal and the gang

have found friendlier places to live ;)

[lonestarnot]

15. And bushitler's shit doesn't stank!

[mr blur]

17. Mad Chimp Disease, though (nt)