The GOP sent me a post-paid envelope. What should I send back to them?

[demzilla]

I don't know how I got on the "House Conservatives Fund" mailing list, but they'd like me to send them money so they can "fight for not just a Republican majority, but a CONSERVATIVE Republican majority."

Of course, unless I undergo a lobotomy or become posessed by the Devil, that just won't happen. But they did send this postage-paid 4 x 10 envelope. I'd like to send it back with something that will cost them a LOT of money in postage. Rocks were my first thought, but they're rather chunky and I have a feeling the post office won't deliver it.

Any suggestions?

[number6]

1. poop

;) :evilgrin: :smoke:

[goodboy]

59. I second (#2) POOP!

[Blue_In_AK]

64. Funny...

I was thinking about those little smeary poop sticks that we have to take to the clinic every year for our physicals.

[Lord_StarFyre]

2. Print out that Rove Wanted Poster

...Put it in the Envelope, and send it to them

[Syncronaut Seven]

54. Print it on Tyvek paper and imagine their delight

trying to rip it up. :evilgrin:

[MsTryska]

62. love it!!

this gets my vote.



even better if you scrawl

Traitor!!!


across the bottom in thick red sharpie

[WhiteTara]

3. how about a turd and a picture of a flower?

[rodeodance]

23. yeah send them a 'good' pic of Turd Blossom.

[Guckert]

44. here is a good turd blossom pic. you may have missed it. hard to believe

anyone on this site has not seen this.


http://www.cafepress.com/thewhitehouse/438933

[WhiteTara]

65. I hope s/he uses a fresh one eom

[iconoclastic cat]

4. Send a lead plate.

[Lord_StarFyre]

12. ROTFLMAO

buhahahahahahahahahaha

[whistle]

5. Send a democratic flyer

[htuttle]

6. You'd be surprised what the Post Office is willing to deliver

I've heard tell of people taping one of those postage paid envelopes to a brick, then mailing the whole thing in. Not sure if they'd still do that, but they definitely used to be willing to.

[yorkiemommie1]

49. that funnee!

lol

[Canuckistanian]

7. A copy of the Constitution.

They must have misplaced their copy.

[Xipe Totec]

15. * LOL * n/t

[jane_pippin]

52. LOL, my thoughts exactly!

[MiniMe]

8. Can you get a printout of the dead soldiers names in Iraq? n/t

[fryguy]

24. that's a brilliant idea - n/t

[kliljedahl]

More effective

Keith’s Barbeque Central

[getmeouttahere]

9. How about a nice big greasy pork sandwich....

served in a dirty ash tray!

Hey, you could put Kerry/Edwards bumper stickers in it!

[Ivote]

10. Transcript of the CIA hearings

so they can't say they havent heard about it
:kick:

[MN ChimpH8R]

11. Glue it to a brick

and send it first class. :evilgrin:

[Xipe Totec]

13. Postage paid? A brick (NT)

[rodeodance]

17. The RNC talking points which the hearing said were shameful. They are

doing nothing about Rovegate except babmouthing people.

[dajoki]

14. wipe your...

ass with it.:rofl:

[gman16]

19. A torn up

copy of the Constitution.

[TalkingDog]

16. a sheet of lead

[ibegurpard]

32. Or a brick

something heavy.

[Ravy]

46. To paraphrase McDonald's... "They deserve a brick today!" (nt)

[realFedUp]

18. subpoena

they might as well get used to seeing them.

[KarenInMA]

20. As much weight as the envelope can hold

my boyfriend got something like this from a Babtist church (which is an odd thing for a Jew to get), and sent back washers and nails.

[RubyDuby in GA]

21. Go immediately to a copy machine and drop your drawers

then above it in bright red lipstick kiss it so that it's a pair of lips then right in the word 'my' and hope that they get the idea.

And I wonder why they don't send me stuff anymore :shrug:

[Lochloosa]

22. Pictures from Abu Ghraib

[unhappycamper]

25. You can fit a small mail order catalog in a legal size envelope.

If you take your time & cut neatly, you can fit a small LL Bean catalog in. Been doing this for a while now.

I use magazines & mail order catalogs, as the paper is more dense. When I think I have a winner, I ask my friend Bob at the PO to tell me the postage cost. My best stuffing stuffing to date cost MBNA $2.44.

[DBoon]

26. The blood of 25,000 dead Iraqi civilians

nt

[Straight Shooter]

27. Send them a nice letter.

Tell them, "Sorry, I don't drink the kool-aid, it makes me vomit."

[fryguy]

28. the sunday NY Times

or as much of it that will fit in the envelope....

[tulsakatz]

29. what to send

send them a video tape of All the President's Men, the story of Watergate!

Then attach a note and tell them they might want to think about what happened then and what's happening now........during another crooked Republican administration!!

[UncleSepp]

30. All the Canadian change you can find

Tape it all to a sheet of paper and mail it. It'll be heavy, and it's money, but it won't help them a damn.

[KarenInMA]

31. wipe you ass on a dollar bill.

See if you get listed as a donor.

[Pharaoh]

33. attach it to a small planet

and mail it, the postage will be in the trillions........:party:

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

34. Fill it with nail clippings and pennies

[Jane Austin]

35. Pretend you are seriously unsophisticated and

enclose some pocket change.

Then write a shaky "Thanks" or "Keep up the good work" on the response card.

That way they'll keep sending you stuff and you can keep costing them money.

Heh Heh.

[Name removed]

36. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[ET Awful]

37. Pubes.

and something to weigh down the envelope to increase shipping costs of course.

But Pubes would just be funny. Can you imagine getting an envelope full of pubes? You'd be like "DUDE! Some asshole sent me pubes, they must really hate me."

See what I mean?

[Guckert]

38. fill it with 3 x 5 cards and send it back nice and heavy. I fill out the

donation form with wrong info and Ronald Reagan's name and check the box that i would love to donate $100.00. Of course, do not send the money and they will continue to send the post paid envelopes trying to get their $$$$. they dont even care if it is filled with 7 3x5 cards. they are greedy bastards and will keep sending you letters. hilarious.
if you want to, write down nice notes about how you feel about their party.

[Rockholm]

39. Fill it with sand.

[longship]

40. A brick is the standard.

First class! That ought to show them.

[DemoTex]

58. The brick trick from Abbie Hoffman's "Steal This Book."

[MrBenchley]

41. Neatly wrapped cinderblock....

[Moochy]

42. Music of Mass Destruction

[LibinMo]

43. I get mail from the Republican Party all the time.

I have no idea how I got on their list. We live in a solidly Republican area, maybe that's why. I vote in the Democratic Primaries.

I used to write all over the stuff they sent me that I would never vote Republican and request that they take me off the list. Then I'd stick it in their prepaid envelope and send it back.

It has never worked so now I simply make a detour to my garbage can on the way back to the house.

[SalmonChantedEvening]

45. Monopoly Money!

Lots n lots of 500 dollar bills :D

And the obligatory "Spend This!" note.

[BeHereNow]

47. Cat shit

Fresh cat shit-
I have three, let me know if I can help.
BHN

[yorkiemommie1]

48. couple of flyers from Justicefornone.com

a couple of black I DID NOT VOTE 4 BUSH wristbands


DOONESBURY

copies of all the stupid looking BUSH pix you can get your hands on.

oh! don't forget the ENLISTMENT forms!

[1932]

50. A brick, or the heaviest thing you can get in that envelope.

[MissMarple]

51. Would a pocket sized version of the Constitution fit?

And a long article on our liberal heritage? :)

[warrens]

53. The corner mailbox?

One of those big cement blocks wrapped up real purdy?

[area51]

55. well ...

You could tape it to a brick, or send them kitty litter. :evilgrin:

[Village Idiot]

56. Put a new mailing label on it and...

send a small contribution to the DNC.

Every little bit HELPS, and it will make you feel soooooo much better when the GOP subsidizes your political contribution...

[Roy]

57. Send it to Wilma, in Tennessee...

nt

[MN ChimpH8R]

61. Oooohh...

nasty! :spank:

[OrlandoGator]

60. Make sure there's no bar code or ID# on it.

Mass-mail marketers now use this method to trace abuse of their postage-paid envelopes. Just a heads-up.

[yorkiemommie1]

66. good tip!!

will have to remember that.

[Ready2Snap]

63. Deliciusly diabolical - -

The plan:

1-Reproduce the envelope (See above post re: trace back markings)and have a couple thousand printed up.
2-Get a P.O. box at local mail center(Mailboxes Etc., UPS Store, etc.)
3- Offer them to DUers with a weekly post. Have them send you a buck for each envelope plus a SASE.

They can send them all the wonderful things listed above(except the illegal ones, of course!)
and you can use the profits to support local progressive candidates.

You get to have fun, they get to pay the bill! What could be better?