Hey Buddy! Your Foreign Policy Looks A Bit Ragged. Let Me Talk You...

[DistressedAmerican]

Originally posted the graphic yesterday. Didn't think about some text until I was posting it to my site today...

Now, I bring you the sales pitch! (sorry for the repetion.)
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AMAZE YOUR FRIENDS WITH WITH YOUR OWN "AMAZING DRINKING BIRD"!

This wonder of science makes a great national foreign policy. This fantastic gizmo starts lapping up that crude oil and it just keeps on going.

You wonder when the barrel will run dry? Never! Not as long as this stylish bald eagle has that sharp beak! What country does not want to "willingly" give up its oil reserves to such a well armed and furious beast? This little guy makes the energizer bunny look like the sad little toy he is. Look how he handeled Saddam!



The cost?

Well, lets put it this way, how much would you pay to keep America running smoothly in its inefficient vehicles? How much is it worth to you to have a nice steady supply of fuel to keep your family warm in the winter? Cost you see is not the issue.

Well, if you insist on knowing a cost...

Lets say $200,000,000,000.00 (for starts). Of course it is a subscription service. That number is just installation and start-up.

What will it cost you going forward? Look, once you "dip your beak" so to speak, the oil euphoria will be well worth the cost. OK! We'll make you a deal. How about we make Asia pay really high costs and cut you "big beakers" some slack?

Who do you have to kill to get such a sweet deal? Who has to die? You sure do have a lot of questions.

Well, no projection is really certain. Lets say about 700 Americans a year.

Yes, yes. That IS just the reported and directly linked deaths. There will be some other "collateral damage". Don't worry about that though. A lot of those you will NEVER HEAR ABOUT! "Out of site, out if mind" is our motto.

Who do we have to kill? OK, again let me caution you, there is no good way of telling. Going ahead I will not even hazard a guess. So far our clients have not complained about the 100,000 or more Iraqis that were in the way. Again, we have a sweetheart deal with the networks NOT TO REPORT on that unfortunate shall we call it side effect of this plan.

But, you the consumer will not have time to worry about that. Once you are rolling in your new SUV and blowing off the news to watch "Reality Television" you will not care anyway. That's if you even think about it.

YOU'LL TAKE IT! GREAT!

Just sign here___________________

and initial

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It has been great doing business with you. You have a great day!

Off to lunch, then back to Halliburton for me!

[DistressedAmerican]

1. Kicker!

[DistressedAmerican]

2. Another

[DistressedAmerican]

3. A Third