Homeland Security lightbulb joke

[dsewell]

Q: How long does it take Michael Chertoff to change a lightbulb?

A: Five days.

On the first day, he notices that the lightbulb is out.

On the second day, he brings a new lightbulb.

On the third day, he screws the lightbulb in, but the room remains dark.

On the fourth day, someone points out to him that he has forgotten to flip the light switch.

On the fifth day, he flips the light switch and the light comes back on.

And on the sixth day, he holds a news conference to say that no one could have predicted a scenario where lightbulb filament failure would be accompanied by a light switch in the off position!

[fiveleafclover]

1. Beautiful!

:applause:

[idiosyncratic]

2. Excellent!

Thanks for that!

[Island Blue]

3. And on the 7th day he rests

Screwing in light bulbs is hard werk!

[Lindacooks]

4. Excellent, but I would change it:

On the first day, he hears that the lightbulb is out but doesn't believe it.

On the second day, he grudgingly concedes we need a new light bulb and makes a note to buy one.

On the third day, he goes to the store to get a lightbulb but gets distracted by free ice cream.

On the fourth day, he finally buys a lightbulb.

On the fifth day, he screws it in, but the room remains dark.

On the sixth day, someone points out he has forgotten to flip the switch.

And on the seventh day, he flips the switch, the light comes on, and points out that no one could have predicted a scenario where lightbulb filament failure would be accompanied by a light switch in the off position.

[MisterP]

5. don't forget day 3, when switch-flippers are kept out of the room

by armed patrols
on day 4, gunmen are said to be seen in the dark

[Gabi Hayes]

6. he's already committed obvious perjury....I linked this during his

confirmation hearings

http://www.democracynow.org/article.pl?sid=05/01/13/1455248

"We speak with former Justice Department attorney, Jesselyn Radack, who charges that department officials under Michael Chertoff improperly questioned John Waker Lindh and that her memos raising ethical concerns about his interrogation were purged and not turned over to a criminal court.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Michael Chertoff, President Bush's Homeland Security Chief nominee, was praised by Senate Democrats and state lawyers this week as being a tough but fair prosecutor who would serve well as Tom Ridge's replacement.
But as his record comes under fresh scrutiny, questions are being raised about his handling of the case of John Walker Lindh - the so-called American Taliban. As head of the criminal division of the Justice Department, the 2002 prosecution of Lindh was one of Chertoff"s biggest triumphs.

But the case resurfaced the following year in Senate confirmation hearings after Chertoff was nominated to be a federal appellate judge. At that time, Senate Democrats questioned Chertoff extensively about concerns that the FBI might have improperly questioned Lindh in Afghanistan even though his family had hired a lawyer for him. "

there's another, well documented, story about him representing a doctor who had probably terror financing ties

[RUMMYisFROSTED]

7. Unfortunately, he put a 10 watt bulb in a 100 watt city.

Shame!