If you sterilized all Republicans...

[BurtWorm]

:think:


http://majikthise.typepad.com/majikthise_/2005/09/if_you_steriliz.html


People, please. Bill Bennett was just being philosophical when he suggested that aborting all black babies would reduce crime. There's nothing offensive about a little reductio amongst friends.

So, now it's my turn.

If you sterilized all Republicans, the crime rate would eventually drop. You'd end the intergenerational legacy of crime. If you squelched that culture of corruption you'd see less insider trading, less corruption, less criminal conspiracy, fewer illegal wars...

Of course, I'm not advocating the forcible sterilization of registered Republicans. That would be morally reprehensible, not to mention impractical. Nevertheless, it's obviously true that Republicans form an intractable criminal subculture. So, sterilizing them all would be an effective, if excessive, response to the rising tide of looting that threatens to overwhelm society as we know it.

Inevitably, these remarks will prove offensive to some people. They'll say that my choice of hypothetical betrays my unabashed contempt for Republicans. They'll say that it's intellectually sloppy, not to mention hostile, to stereotype all Republican wombs as felon-factories.

Obviously, these naysayers don't understand high-minded intellectual give and take. Too bad I'm statistically and logically unassailable.

If we could deport those trouble makers to Twin Earth and drown them in XYZ, that'd stop their bellyaching.

[rzemanfl]

1. And me not knowing where I put that rusty can opener....n/t

[rodeodance]

3. gee, no playtoys?

[mhr]

2. The Rest Of Us Could Get On With The Business of Living

eom

[skids]

4. ...they'd just smuggle white kids from Ireland to Latin America...

...and then adopt them.

[China_cat]

5. If you sterilized all republicans

the average IQ would jump at least 20 points in the next generation.

[charlie]

6. Wouldn't make a difference

They "reproduce" by raiding hyena litters.

[Az]

7. FIguring that white color crime is far more costly than all other crime

Maybe we should sterilize the repugs.... for the greater good of course.

[rasputin1952]

8. I have often wondered why petty thieves, much less those who steal

to eat, get relatively huge sentences; while those that steal millions get off lightly. One of the great 'ponderables' of "justice" in America...:shrug:

[Jose Diablo]

9. Well, what would we do for judges

if all the republicans were snipped. Sure there is plenty now, but eventually they'd all pass on to that big court in the sky. Then what? It would be disaster I say. Disaster.

I kinda like the idea of post partum abortion though. It's a quicker solution but likely to miss the worse and target some that could be salvaged, with education. I know it would be expensive, but still, would the world be a better place with no opposition? Probably be dull. Nothing like a good fight to get the blood pumping.

It's pretty clear though, it looks like the top of the food chain in criminals seem to be politically on the conservative side. I wonder why that is.

[INdemo]

10. I sent this to Gibson at Faux News

Do you suppose he'll read it