Am I getting killed with kindness here?

[Robb]

Apologies for Robb's separation thread #4,273... :eyes:

So the future-ex-Mrs. Robb is selling me the paid-off truck for a dollar. She wants me to shift all the utilities into my name, but wants to pay for all the bills (including whatever I charge on the CC) for the next three months. She wants me to keep the house, paying the mortgage for the next three months and I take over after that, keeping it in joint ownership with the understanding that if I sell it we split the released equity.

Is this just an absurdly amicable split-up? Or is there a primrose path I'm being led down? :shrug:

[LynneSin]

1. Geez, if she's single can I marry her next?

Sounds like a generous woman!

[Robb]

20. Ha! She's all yers.

Love your sigpic, by the way. :)

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

2. Does sound suspicious

But I don't know the details of the split, so I wouldn't know what the motivation might be.

On edit: I hope this all works out well for you, as I know how hard that must be to go through.

[DS1]

3. sudden tax writeoff on the truck?

:shrug:

[Pale Blue Dot]

4. Maybe she knows she's wrong.

Maybe she trusts you.
Maybe she's trying to avoid lawyers.

:shrug:

Might be a good idea to get some legal advice on this, though.

[Dookus]

5. I've known of such amicable breakups

they DO happen. I'd say, if no children are involved, it's much more likely to be a very friendly split.

If she's offering, take it.

[Lisa0825]

6. My ex was very generous. I am pretty sure it was guilt.

It made him feel less like the "bad guy" for walking out.

[felonious thunk]

7. Guilt for the breakup?

Sounds like she feels like she's hurt you, knows it, and wants to make sure that you do OK. She clearly still thinks highly of you, and though the marriage didn't work out, she wants the best for you. I don't know if she has any cause to feel guilty over the split, or if there's something she hasn't told you, but whatever the case, she wants to make sure you don't get screwed.

[southerngirlwriter]

8. No little Robbs running around?

I've known of break-ups this amicable, and even more so (a friend of mine's ex re-financed the house for her so she could afford it on her teacher's salary and then co-signed the friggin' loan, LOL).

But only if children aren't involved. If they are, I'd say you're being set up to get fucked later.

[Robb]

10. LOL! No, no little Robbs....

(insert genitalia joke here)

:D

[ScreamingMeemie]

9. One of my dear friends is going through this right now. Basically, she

just wanted to end the marriage, and has been quite the same as the soon to be ex-Mrs Robb. I guess I wouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. It sounds like she just wants it done with.


Lots of hugs to you, Laura

[eyesroll]

11. This sounds like guilt

I know you haven't posted every last detail, but from what I've heard, it seems like the future-ex-Mrs. Robb initiated this for non-fault reasons (i.e. you weren't cheating on her or treating her awfully). Often, people who initiate a no-fault/"we're growing apart"/"I love you but I'm not in love with you" divorce feel guilty about it, and end up giving up more than they need to legally to compensate.

You may want to check with your lawyer -- some states won't allow a massively lopsided settlement, even with consent of both parties.

And, on edit -- Friends of ours are going through what seems to be a very amicable divorce, at least to us on the outside. Anything's possible.

[kmla]

12. The only thing I question is that she wants to keep the house in joint

ownership. If you live in an area where houses appreciate quickly, she could possibly be setting you up to take advantage of your lack of knowledge in finances. Not to say she would, but...

For instance, say you keep the house for 5 years after it's final. The house appreciates much faster than inflation, and you get oodles of equity when you finally decide to sell. In the agreement, ex-Mrs. Robb would be entitled to 1/2 of (or whatever the agreed split was) the oodles of money when you sell the house. And as you know, .5 x oodles can still be a decent chunk of money.

She would receive this equity for making a total of 3 mortgage payments, and providing none of the upkeep on this house in those five years. Sounds a little like a peach of a deal - for at least one party in the transaction. I would talk to a financial advisor or lawyer, if it were me. But that's just me...:shrug:

Just my $.02.

[displacedtexan]

15. Isn't that better than forcing a sale now?

That would be the other option for her.

Robb, this is a great deal... if your experienced divorce lawyer agrees!

[kmla]

16. IMO, no. Buying out her portion of the equity would be

the best option (if financially feasible). That would allow the appreciation of the house to be realized and captured by the person that actually took care of it, not by the person who made a passive investment.

But that's just my opinion.

Thanks for asking, though. Lately, I was beginning to think no one was reading my posts...

[Robb]

18. LOL! I'm reading!!

:)

But yeah, right now I'm in no position to buy out her equity. She's really had all the savings in mutual funds that have been in her name from day one.

During the joint ownership, she wants to split any maintenance costs that break $200. :shrug:

[Whitacre D_WI]

13. Never trust people who are nice to you.

People are liars, thieves, and worse.

</paranoid, misanthropic rant>

[SarahB]

14. It's guilt

I want to split more than my hubby and because of that, I'm probably going to give up my share of the house and just let him have it. I really don't want anything from him except for us to work together to put the children's needs first. It's time I took care of myself in life.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

17. she sounds like a good person

[JVS]

19. Talk to your lawyer. Make sure that this is on the level.

Make sure that if you agree to this stuff she cannot shove the proverbial red-hot poker up your ass at a later date.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

21. Wow I don't wanna marry her, I just wanna divorce her

Sounds like she's got a guilty conscience about something.

[camero]

22. Get everything in writing

Just so you aren't led down the primrose path. It's sad to say but divorce can be hell.