Who here has lost their fear of death?

[Syncronaut Seven]

I'm curious. It happened to me about 2 years ago after some very powerfull and vivid dreams of a new American civil war. It changed the way I look at life, how I respond to others.

Not the stereotypical bravado "bring it on" swagger, but a sense of calm I hadn't ever felt before. I dont admit it to folks much, I find the expressions of shock, horror and/or disbelief I receive to be confusing and unsettling.

I fear for the safety of my wife & child but no longer for myself.

Is this something to be worried about?

Am I nuts?

I would be interested if others had similar experiences they would like to share.

Harrad.

[ComerPerro]

1. Im pretty much indifferent, if that makes sense

I don't really have any experiences that I could relate.

It's just not something that I think about, and its not really something that worries me.

If it happens, then it happens.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

2. No point in fear

You live, you die.

It's hardest on the survivors.

[MsSnood]

3. I have no fear of death

I don't invite it or seek death, but I have no fear of death if my time should come. I see it as an opportunity to see people that have passed that I miss.

[kera]

4. a philosopher said

that wisdom is to get to know death

that is to say you are not nut . I don't want to seem lecturing you it is just what came to my mind

I feel the same way, may be more so in a sense that I feel dead already . I feel like being a mass of energy going about, no desire; old dreams continue to give some direction to this energy to nowhere.

The feeling you have is usually the result of very traumatic experience, or deep religious belief.

I lived through so many traumatic life threatening experiences , fears, stood up in the midst of bloodshed that down the road I Lost the sens of life... ......

........
a light not

Things happen, democracy is untidy

[DustMolecule]

7. :hug:

don't give up.....courage! You've obviously done a lot....don't give up during the final laps!!!!

[kera]

11. I very much appreciate the Hug

[DustMolecule]

13. We very much appreciate your good example

....it's priceless. Thank you.

on edit: corrected grammar

[Syncronaut Seven]

25. Hi Kera!

It's nice to hear I'm not nuts, despite overwhelming evidense to the contrary :P

"I lived through so many traumatic life threatening experiences , fears, stood up in the midst of bloodshed that down the road I Lost the sens of life" Sounds alot like me.

Thanks!
:hug:

[Guaranteed]

5. Yeah...I know what you mean...I think...

I don't think I'm afraid to die- if I HAVE to, that is. I mean, when my time comes I'm not going to be fearful.

I came to this conclusion much like you did: I imagined myself in combat. When I first thought about it, I thought I'd be scared as hell, and I imagined everyone else around me would be, too...I try to imagine crouching down behind something while bullets are zipping by and such...but, then I thought, you know, I don't think I'd really be that scared...I think I could be the guy to jump out and make a charge.....

I dunno. :shrug: It's kind of hard to make those kinds of judgments while never having been faced with a situation like that.

[Th1onein]

6. Since my son died, I have no fear of death.

I look forward to it, because I know that that is the only way I will ever see him again.

[Quetzal]

8. I don't think about it

n/t

[RoyGBiv]

9. Fear of Life

The responses to this thread have been interesting to me. This is a subject that is basically taboo in my family, and most of my friends don't know how to discuss it. But, it's something that has been with me since I was very young.

I've realized recently that what I had long thought was an extreme fear of death is actually more like a fear of life, or more specifically, a fear of survival. This may sound weird, but when I was about 7 or 8 I saw the movie When Worlds Collide and for months afterward had vivid and terrifying nightmares about the world being all but destroyed by a meteor impact. It wasn't just the movie; I'd had an interest in science since I could read, and I'd already at that time read about meteor impacts and one of the theories about what had caused the extinction of the dinosaurs.

The troubling thing about the dreams was that I survived, and I was alone, and suffering. I was always hungry, searching for food, having to fight and kill just to live, and there was no one else there that I loved or that cared one whit for me.

It never struck me at the time that this is what frightened me: living through an apocalyptic event. I also grew up with the fear of nuclear holocaust, saw the move The Day After and had those fears intensified. Again, this fell into the realm of fear of survival, but I took it at the time as fear of death.

I have an irrational fear of starvation. In manifests itself with my not being able to eat the last cookie, or the last piece of bread, or the last slice of cheese. Many things have contributed to this, including periods of extreme poverty and my mother, the classic pessimist, making jokes about our condition in an attempt to cheer me up, but without her realizing it, actually causing my fears to deepen.

As I said, I saw all this as a fear of death, because I hadn't analyzed it. But I was forced to recently when I found myself in the midst of my first ever period of extended unemployment. I feel panic on a daily basis, and it's not caused by the fear of dying, but the fear of being forced to live through extreme privation. And it's more the fear of the unknown since I'm not actually to that point yet and never have been. This leads to suicidal thoughts, which one would think would be devoid of survivalist fears, but they're not ... what if it goes wrong, what if that bullet just leaves me extremely brain damaged, and my mother and daughter are left caring for me and wondering why with me able to witness their pain. It got very confusing.

I'm not afraid to die. I don't want to die because I have some sort of eternal sense of hope that it will get better. But, I am afraid of surviving the horror of some awful event that I cannot overcome and cannot forsee.

Hope that made some degree of sense.

[kera]

10. Listen

don't want to die because I have some sort of eternal sense of hope that it will get better. But, I am afraid of surviving the horror of some awful event that I cannot overcome and cannot forsee


Sens of hope, get better, you have within you the moral tools and strength to overcome those deep seated fears, unless even the sens of hope you are talking about is a mechanism your mind has chosen to fight, in either case, you are covered ...just relax and get to know yourself, nothing is going to happen and if it does , nobody will survive so you won't be alone

[RoyGBiv]

14. Thanks for the thoughts

I've been through therapy and dealt with a lot of this. I don't have the horrible fear of living through a nuclear holocaust I once had, and I definitely don't fear a cataclysmic event like a large meteor impact. Hell, I live at a ground zero place now, and the meteor hit would indeed kill us all ... no real worries there. It'd all be over and done.

But events in my recent life have allowed the fear to mutate. I am far too cognizant of the fact that if it weren't for the fact my mother is still alive, I would have been homeless in the recent past and could be again in the near future if a few things don't fall into place. I think part of this stems from the fact I grew up in a small town that, believe it or not, had a very low rate of homelessness despite an over-abundance of unemployment and extreme poverty. People there helped each other, and you never saw anyone sleeping on the street. I moved to where I am now, and I daily see people sleeping underneath an overpass. It may sound trite, but it occurs to me every time I see this, "There but for the grace of whatever higher wisdom there may be go I." I've been right on the brink of being there, and it scares me. This is not an apocalyptic event; it's one that ends with me out in the dust and with no perception of options. I truly don't know how the homeless survive.

And please realize I want to avoid sounding like I'm whining. Some, maybe much, of what's going on with me today is at least partly my fault, and I do have the power to pull myself out of it. I'm working on that. I also know the fears are to some degree abstract. It can't be all bad if I still have a computer and an Internet connection, after all. It's just a fear, and it's irrational in some ways. I just felt like sharing it because it connects with the original subject, at least in my mind.

Sorry if it seems like I hijacked the thread. I didn't intend that.

[kera]

17. I would like to be able to help you

IF YOU WANT i WILL GIVE YOU MY EMAIL ADRESS

i MAY BE OF SOME HELP TO YOU

[DustMolecule]

12. :hugs: to you too....

think about....what if that 'stray bullet' you fear leaves your wife or daughter helpless....the golden rule applies (and can be scary)...treat other ppl the way that you would like to be treated. What if YOU are called, not to be an invalid, but to be of service to someone else who needs your helP? What would you do? Can you 'be of service' in the long haul?<rhetorical question...no response required>

[DemExpat]

15. Yeah, it makes sense.....

I have been obsessed by fear of death since I was a little girl and dreamed of sitting all alone by my mother's grave.

My life also has been strongly colored by fears and depressions, and a panicky fear of dying, but since my parents and other family/friends/beloved pets have died, I find my fear is lessening - as if I see that "life goes on" despite death.

My experiences and readings have been teaching me that my fear of death is actually fear of abandonment, of being totally alone, and that one's own EGO does not really have any control whatsoever over events....... and that giving up on that wish for control is a big clue to peace of mind and peace with death.

DemEx

[DemExpat]

16. .....although one has a lot of control over the order of one's own

little environment...just not over "big" events....imho.

:hug:

DemEx

[RoyGBiv]

18. Desire for Control

Yes, I think that's a lot of it, for a lot of people. I can definitely see it in myself, because I've felt recently, when boiled down to basic emotions, is a sense of helplessness that I've been trying very hard to overcome. And in some ways, it's that battle that causes or at least supports the fears, yet the battle is necessary in order to survive. It's a circle.

Again, this may sound trite, but it would be hard for me to exaggerate the benefits of me finding a forum such as this, where things like this can be discussed along with my sometimes volatile political opinions. There are some really great people here.

[DemExpat]

21. DU is the only site I participate in.......it is the best

in SO many ways.

:hi:

DemEx

[kera]

19. fEAR OF DEATH

is the most natural thing in the living realm

that is why the instinct of conservation is all about


In some circonstances the fear emerges , and it should be good because its corrolary is the desire for live thus hope thus ,,,

I see here taht many of you sound like ashamed of the feeling
dont' be on the contrary you should harness the fear into joie de vivre

[DemExpat]

20. Certainly fear of death is natural and healthy,

but what some of us experience goes far beyond any natural survival instincts.

Also, I feel no shame for my feelings and fears - they are simply the other side of the "coin" of my rich range of feelings - from the love, happiness and joy that I also experience.

I would not want to trade either side for another life, and value my life as a learning tool....

:hi:

DemEx

[ForrestGump]

22. 19 years ago I realized that I was invincible

Really. Not invulnerable (I can still get hurt, darn it, with no kryptonite involved) and I'm pretty sure I'm not immortal -- though with my genetic heritage I'll probably last a very long time yet, accidents notwithstanding -- but episodes in my earlier days that'd qualify as rather dire just did not shake me and I came away with an immensely strong feeling that I would be okay, that it was nowhere near 'my time.' I'm not stupid about it (I'm very cautious, and I need to be paranoid about safety because I participate in several physically risky pursuits) and I have to admit that I'll be a bit worried if that feeling of being superhumanly/supernaturally protected ever goes away...

[izzie]

23. No point at my age. I have out lived my mother, father and sister.

My great grand parents lived into their 90's and so did the great great but I do not wish to live that long. It will be soon and I face that fact.It does not always feel scary but then at times it does.I am running down. things are wearing out.But I do like to get up every day and wonder what is going on every place and with every one.The zest for life is still with me.

[YellowRubberDuckie]

24. My fear of death stems from the question of an afterlife...

I was having panic attacks thinking about it before. I started reading the evidence of the afterlife, and it was comforting. And some of the things that the bible says are comforting as well. I don't know what I believe...but I do have a pretty good idea of what will happen when I die. And right now my biggest fear is dying and not getting to spend eternity with my beloved.

I'm also convinced that it is my lot in life to watch everyone else that I love go first. It's been that way since I was 5 and I lost my grandpa. I must have done something in a past life or something that makes this my punishment. But it also might be because I can handle it. Skip has never lost anyone that was close to him, and it scares me to think what will happen when he loses his parents, his grandparents. It's thoughts like this that keep me up at night.
Duckie

[Syncronaut Seven]

26. Thanks all!

:pals: