Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login
Google

Days of Hollywood Squares

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread
This topic is archived.
Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU
 
CO Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-02-04 01:48 PM
Original message
Days of Hollywood Squares
Similar lists of "Hollywood Squares" answers have been posted in the past, but this one includes a few new ones. Enjoy!! - Wayne

* * * * *

Days of Hollywood Squares

If you remember the original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this will bring a tear to your eyes. These great questions and answers are from the days when "Hollywood Squares" game show responses were spontaneous and clever, not scripted and (often) dull as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course. Please note: most, if not all, of those answering the questions are (now) DEAD!

Q. Do female frogs croak?

A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

* * * * *

Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?

A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

* * * * *

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.

A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.

* * * * *

Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?

A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.

* * * * *

Q. According to Cosmo, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?

A. Rose Marie: No, wait until morning.

* * * * *

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?

A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

* * * * *

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I Love You"?

A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

* * * * *

Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?

A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.

* * * * *

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?

A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.

* * * * *

Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?

A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

* * * * *

Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?

A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.

* * * * *

Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?

A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

* * * * *

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?

A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

* * * * *

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail what will a goose do?

A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

* * * * *

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?

A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

* * * * *

Q. According to Ann Landers, is their anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?

A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

* * * * *

Q. While visiting China, your tour guide starts shouting "Poo! Poo! Poo!" What does this mean?

A. George Gobel: Cattle crossing.

* * * * *

Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?

A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

* * * * *

Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?

A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.

* * * * *

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?

A. Charley Weaver: His feet

* * * * *

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?

A. Paul Lynde: Point and Laugh

:-)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
Liberal Classic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-02-04 01:52 PM
Response to Original message
1. RIP Paul Lynde
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
CO Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-02-04 01:55 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. He Was One of the Great Ones
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
trotsky Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-02-04 01:58 PM
Response to Reply #1
4. I regret being too young
to appreciate his comedic skills while he was alive.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
CO Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-02-04 02:03 PM
Response to Reply #4
8. Not to Worry (If You Have Cable or a Satellite Dish)
They show "Classic Hollywood Squares" on "Game Show Network" - episodes from the Late '60s and Early '70s. And many of Paul Lynde's guest appearances on shows such as "The Munsters" and "Bewitched" show up on "Nick At Nite" and "TV Land" all the time.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Servo300 Donating Member (653 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-02-04 02:02 PM
Response to Reply #1
7. He was absolutely hysterical!!!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
joeybee12 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-02-04 01:57 PM
Response to Original message
3. Poor Rose Marie--anyone see the Dick Van Dyke Reunion Special?
She's having trouble getting around. Well, not surprising since she's about 104!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Servo300 Donating Member (653 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-02-04 02:02 PM
Response to Reply #3
6. I saw it.
Thought she looked a little worn out.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
supernova Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-02-04 02:01 PM
Response to Original message
5. I miss Paul Lynde
He was totally funny!

And dear George Goebel, such a teddy bear.

RIP to you both.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
CO Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-02-04 02:09 PM
Response to Reply #5
9. And Here's a Picture of George
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DU AdBot (1000+ posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to view 
this author's profile Click to add 
this author to your buddy list Click to add 
this author to your Ignore list Tue Apr 23rd 2024, 01:04 AM
Response to Original message
Advertisements [?]
 Top

Home » Discuss » The DU Lounge Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators


Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC