My husband killed himself this morning

[flamingyouth]

We were in the early stages of getting a divorce and he was at a friend's house. I don't have any more details, but I'm on my way there to meet with the sheriff's deputy now.

He was a very troubled man and I am completely devastated. Thank you for listening.
Lisa

[bratcatinok]

1. I am so very, very sorry.

You'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

My Dad committed suicide so I can understand what you may be going through. If I can do anything to help, please let me know.

[flamingyouth]

108. Thank you for your PM

I will get back to you soon. I appreciate it so much. :hug:

[WillyBrandt]

278. I am so so so sorry

Please, please, please console yourself with friends and family. You likely have some that you trust, and they are there for you--please let them help and console and simple hang out with and talk to you.

I can't think of anything more to say; only know that many anonymous folks on this board extend their deepest sympathies. I am one of them.

Try, as best as you can, to be well

[Zynx]

2. That's terrible. I hope you can hold up.

:(

[flamingyouth]

109. Thank you Zynx

I am doing all I can. I am blessed with the best friends in the world.

[Pithlet]

3. Oh no! I'm so sorry.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

110. Thank you, Pithlet

thank you so much

[terrya]

4. Oh, my God! Oh, honey...

I'm so sorry.

Let us know how you're doing when you can, ok?

:hug:

Terry

[flamingyouth]

111. Terry, you angel

Thank you for the PM - I'll respond later. You're so wonderful, and I thank you for your friendship. :hug:

[Fenris]

5. Oh sweet flamingyouth I am so very sorry.

I know things have been rough lately. I'm so, so sorry. :(

[flamingyouth]

112. Thank you so much Fenris

Please keep cheering me up, as you always do. :hug:

[JCMach1]

6. so sorry

:(

[flamingyouth]

113. Thank you so much

:hug:

[FleshCartoon]

7. I'm sorry.

Don't take yourself to task over this, though. When people are that troubled, they are nearly impossible to reach, even by professionals.

Be kind to yourself.

[flamingyouth]

114. Thank you, FleshCartoon

And you are so right. I tried everything possible to help him and I couldn't reach him. Thank you for your support.

[supernova]

8. Good Lord! I'm so sorry flamingyouth

That's completely shocking.

I'll keep you in my thoughts.

[flamingyouth]

115. Thank you

We have a wonderful community here, and I appreciate your kind words.

[HuckleB]

9. May you find understanding, love and peace on this difficult road.

My thoughts are with you.

[flamingyouth]

116. Thanks, HuckleB

Your words mean so much. :hug:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

10. Oh my god Lisa

I have no words to comfort you...I am so sorry...I know you were regretting all of this...I am so sorry

on edit...and I KNOW you loved him

[flamingyouth]

117. Teena, my pal and my angel

You are the best. Anyone who offers her ear at 3 am deserves a special spot in my heart. Love you always!

[m-jean03]

There are no words

But I am so, so sorry, flamingyouth

My thoughts are with you today.

Mara

[flamingyouth]

118. I know, Mara

Thank you for your kindess and your thoughts. :hug:

[jono]

11. I am so sorry.

That's quite a shock. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers. :(

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

119. Thanks, jono

:hug:

[Parrcrow]

12. That's terrible.

my thoughts are with you

[flamingyouth]

120. Thanks, parrcrow

:hug: I love your avatar. Alan was a big Hitchhiker fan. :D

[BlackVelvetElvis]

13. God, I am so sorry.

I'll be thinking of you. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

121. Thank you

I appreciate your kindness. :hug:

[matcom]

14. i have no idea what to say

i'm sorry

[Misinformed01]

23. I am so sorry

Anything I can write now is inadequate to express our empathy for you-

Stephanie and Michael

[flamingyouth]

124. Thank you, Stephanie and Michael

Your words speak loud and clear :hug:

[flamingyouth]

123. Thank you, matcom

:hug:

[Bonhomme Richard]

15. You are in my prayers. n/t

[flamingyouth]

125. Thank you

:hug:

[Lars39]

16. I'm so sorry, flamingyouth.

:( :hug:

[flamingyouth]

126. Thank you, Lars39

:hug:

[DemExpat]

17. OMG.......

How shocking and terribly sad for you all.

My brother-in-law killed himself last year...:cry:

Keep us posted on how you are doing throughout this ordeal.

:hug:

Barb

[flamingyouth]

127. Oh, Barb

Thank you so much and for sharing the story of your brother-in-law. It's still so unreal. Your support and kindness mean the world to me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. :hug:

[ronnykmarshall]

18. Oh my god Lisa!

I am so sorry.

[flamingyouth]

128. Thanks, Ronny

I always love how your posts cheer me up, so don't let me down now! :D :hug:

[ronnykmarshall]

260. I'll never let you down

Watcha want?

Tap dancin'?

My Natalie Cole impression?

I'm hear for ya baby! :loveya:

[exJW]

19. I'm very sorry. n/t

[flamingyouth]

129. Thank you, exJW

:)

[Misunderestimator]

20. No one should ever have to bear the sorrow of this kind of loss...

So sorry for you. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

130. No, no one ever should

Thank you for your kind thoughts. :hug:

[mvd]

21. Oh my - that's horrible

And I remember you recently thought you were getting a new start. I'm very sorry. Accept this big hug. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

131. Thanks

I miss you down in the mod forum. You're a super guy. :hug:

[Robb]

22. Oh god, Lisa...

I have no idea what to say. Anything you need at all, let me know.

[mede8er]

36. My deepest.....

sympathy....we'll all help you through this........

[flamingyouth]

132. Thank you, Robb

I mean it, thank you for everything that you offered me. You're a wonderful person. :hug:

[bicentennial_baby]

24. Oh Lisa

I have no words except that you are in my thoughts. Stay strong. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

133. Thank you

:hug:

[Mikimouse]

25. Oh...God, I have no words, Lisa, I am so sorry...

I don't know what else to say. Most importantly, you cannot take ownership of this, ever! I .......nevermind, I can't see the keyboard.:hug:

[flamingyouth]

134. Good advice

And I'm working on it really hard. Thank you for saying that. It means a lot. Thank you for your kindness toward me. :hug:

[ET Awful]

I'm so sorry . . . .

There's really nothing else I can say :(.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

136. Thank you

Please keep showing those cute Quinn pics and I'll feel better real soon. :D

[never cry wolf]

26. I am so sorry for you

Please try to be at peace in your heart.

[flamingyouth]

137. Thank you - I am trying really hard

Your words mean a lot to me. :hug:

[buff2]

27. So sorry to hear that.....

Just don't blame yourself,whatever you do. I wish you the very best. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

138. Thank you, buff2

You're a sweetheart :hug:

[BigBigBear]

28. Oh my God

I just replied to your nice note to me, and saw this. Terrible tragedy.

My sincerest condolences to you and your family. Please get in touch when you feel able - perhaps we can help each other. I would cherish the opportunity. I will PM my phone number.

Peace and strength to you.

[flamingyouth]

139. I will probably call you next week

Thank you for taking the time to comfort me in the midst of your own grief. We are a family here, and I feel very loved. :hug:

[amerikat]

29. I'm so sorry....our thoughts and prayers are with you

[flamingyouth]

141. Thank you, amerikat

It's so much appreciated. :hug:

[Liberal_Andy]

30. when you feel like it, tell us about him, some good things

peace

[flamingyouth]

142. I will - he had lots of good qualities

But he had so many problems he couldn't help. At least he is now at peace. Thank you.:hug:

[arwalden]

31. I'm So Sorry To Hear The Tragic News. That's Very Sad...

... I send you my condolences, and my hopes that with the help of your family and friends you'll be able to cope with the days ahead. Best of luck to you.

-- Allen

[flamingyouth]

144. Thanks, Allen

I appreciate your kind thoughts and words. :hug:

[proud patriot]

32. Check your inbox

:cry:

[flamingyouth]

145. Thank you, Trish

You're an earth-bound angel. Really. :hug:

[Darth_Kitten]

33. I don't know what to say

Please let us know how you are doing. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[flamingyouth]

146. Thanks, DK

Your posts always cheer me up and I love your graphics. Give Murfee a nice head-scratch for me today. :hug:

[madrchsod]

34. you know we are all here for you

and we will lend an ear if you need to talk..sorry for him and you ,there`s nothing i else i can say..........

[flamingyouth]

147. Thank you

And I do know that people are all here for me. It is an amazing, wonderful gift. :hug:

[joycep]

35. I am so sorry

I wish there was something I could do for you. Please do not blame yourself for this. He was undoubtedly suffering from depression or something. I know where of I speak. I have attempted suicide during depressed states. It was truly my own stuff, even though I didn't think so at the time.

[flamingyouth]

148. I am so sorry for your own pain

And thank you for being so brave to talk about it. I'm sending you all my love that you live a happy life. :hug: Thank you for your kind words. :hug:

[woofless]

37. Oh Flamingyouth, I am so sorry.

I am the survivor of two close-by suicides, one of which was my father. PLEASE,PLEASE,PLEASE talk to a counselor as soon as possible. Even if you don't want to, a good one can help you look at things in a different way than you might be inclined to. Know that all here hold you in our hearts. Talk and vent and rant all you want. We are here.

Woof

[flamingyouth]

149. I have already spoken to one

And I am feeling somewhat better, although I am still in shock. Thank you for the good advice, and I know it comes from your heart. I am so sorry for your own losses. :hug:

[rbnyc]

38. OMG! I'm so sorry.

Please know that you can always ask us for anything you need. We're all with you.

[flamingyouth]

150. Thanks Rene

:hug: You're an angel. :hug:

[HEyHEY]

39. Oh jesus Flaming youth I'm so sorry

I don't know what to say...

[flamingyouth]

151. Thank you Jeremy

:hug:

[Paradise]

40. oh, my god, no. i'm so very, very sorry, lisa.

don't try to get through this without help. you'll need it, desperately. i know.:cry:

[flamingyouth]

152. Thanks, Paradise

I have a great support system here. Thank you for your kind words and support - it means a lot. :hug:

[Susang]

41. Oh my god

Please let us know how you are doing. I'm so sorry for what you and your families are going through.

[flamingyouth]

153. Thank you, Susan

:hug:

[VelmaD]

42. I'm so sorry

You're in my thoughts. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

154. Thanks, Velma

:hug:

[Wilber_Stool]

43. So Sorry. n/t

[flamingyouth]

155. Thanks

:hug:

[2bfree]

44. Oh my.........

That is so sad, I am so very sorry, take care.

[flamingyouth]

156. Thank you

I appreciate it.

[newyawker99]

45. Lisa!!

:hug: :cry:

[flamingyouth]

157. Oh, Roni, bless your sweet heart

:hug:

[Bush_Eats_Beef]

46. My thoughts and prayers are with you...take care. n/t

[flamingyouth]

158. Thank you

:hug:

[Blue-Jay]

47. Oh no...

I'm so sorry to hear that.

[flamingyouth]

159. Thanks Blue-Jay

:hug:

[SouthALdem]

48. I'm so sorry

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[flamingyouth]

160. Thank you, SouthALdem

And welcome to DU! :hug:

[Pale Blue Dot]

49. Lisa

:loveya::hug:

[flamingyouth]

161. Thank you

You mean so much to me :hug:

[livetohike]

50. I am so sorry flamingyouth

my thoudghts and prayers are with you and your family and friends.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

163. Thank you livetohike

I appreciate your kind words.:hug:

[DoveTurnedHawk]

51. Oh My God

I am so sorry, Lisa. You are in my thoughts.

DTH

[flamingyouth]

164. Thanks Dennis

:hug:

[greatauntoftriplets]

52. Oh Lisa, my heart goes out to you.

Please accept my condolences and good wishes. I am so sorry.

Sheila

[flamingyouth]

165. Thank you, dear Sheila

Thank you for your kind words at this time. :hug:

[liberalhistorian]

53. I'm so sorry, Lisa,

I wish there was something else I could do for you. My nephew killed himself a few years ago, so I have at least some idea of what you and your family are and will be dealing with. Know that it wasn't in any way your fault and that there was nothing you could have done; when people decide on suicide they're in such a personal hell that they see no other way out, it doesn't mean they don't care about you or anything like that.

[flamingyouth]

166. Thank you, Lisa

Thank you for sharing all of this, and I remember you talking about your nephew here. Who can rationalize why anyone does such a thing? There really is nothing we can do, which is why we the survivors often feel so helpless. What a blessing it is to have a support system here at DU. Thank you sincerely.

[bobthedrummer]

54. I am truly sorry to hear this, prayers for strength going out to you.

[flamingyouth]

167. Thanks, Bob

Alan was a drummer too. He played a 1965 Ludwig kit. :cry:

[SheWhoMustBeObeyed]

55. I am so sorry, flamingyouth

What a terrible shock for you, and how tragic for you both. I hope you have good friends and/or family nearby to help you cope.

[flamingyouth]

168. Thank you so much for your kind words

And support. I'm blessed with the best family and friends in the world. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

56. Thank you so much, everyone

I am overwhelmed by the outpouring of sympathy here, and I cannot tell you what it means to me.

He had been staying with his friends and today his band was going to finish up some recording. Tim Kerr, the producer, is on his way to Seattle from Austin to finish up the record. So Alan had gone home with his friends last night. They knew he was depressed and told him that they would do whatever they could for him. They heard him stirring around his room at 7:30 this morning and almost went in to check on him. Ten minutes later they did and found that he had hanged himself.

Alan was a very talented and troubled person. He was a fabulous cook and loved our cats very much. He had a massive record and CD collection, which he lovingly organized. He was also a writer for various 'zines, such as the Bob, the Rocket, the Stranger, Hit List, Maximumrocknroll and others. Together, he and I self-published two fanzines.

He had trouble with depression and lately our marriage had been in deep trouble. I was so frightened by him this week that I changed the locks, then moved to my parents' house. He had threatened me on numerous occasions, but I never imagined that he would do this.

Alan would have been 40 on July 11. So we are in the early stages of planning a memorial show for him somewhere in Seattle. I will post more info when I have it. It sounds like a perfect send-off for a true skeptic - rock & roll was his religion.

Take care of your friends and loved ones, and never forget to tell people that you love them. I love all of you for caring about me and standing by me during this impossible, insane time. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, my dear friends.

[seemslikeadream]

58. I am so sorry flamingyouth

so sorry.

[flamingyouth]

269. Thanks

:hug:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

62. And I want people to know who YOU ARE

Lisa is a warm, loving, gentle soul. She is generous and would give you the shirt off her back even if she were cold if that's what YOU needed.

She loved her husband and her divorce was causing her great distress, but she had reached a point where her marriage would have destroyed her had she not taken a stand.

She is paying DEARLY right now for taking that stand but did not take it out of cruelty. She took it out of it being the right thing to do even though the end result is now devastating.

I just want people to be clear that in no way did you inspire nor create this course of events.

It's what happened.

I wish for Alan's soul to rest in greater peace than it was living in...but I wish for your soul to be able to carry on and LIVE in peace despite all the changes you will now go through that you could have never imagined in a million years you would have to confront.

I love you.

[bratcatinok]

64. I sent Lisa a PM

telling her not to blame herself because his decision to end his life was his decision. She is in NO way to blame at all!

I also told her of the emotions I went through when my Dad killed himself (by also hanging himself). I wanted to share with her some of those feelings because I wanted her to know they were entirely normal. I also suggested she seek some counseling to deal with the feelings of being a suicide survivor.

[flamingyouth]

65. Thank you, Teena

Thank you for everything and for your love for me here. I just don't even know what I'm feeling here, but I tried so hard to get him help. I stayed with him for years because I loved him, but he needed more help than I could give him.

You have been a real gem in my life, Teena. And thank you to all who've sent PMs with your phone numbers, etc. I'm slowly but surely getting back to each of you.

I love you. :hug:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

68. Don't get back to us now unless you are using it to kill time,

fill space or clear your mind....please only do what serves you right now and fuck formalities...we'll all be here later

[Taverner]

218. The fact that she is answering each of our wellwishes...

is a testament to what kind of person she is....

I agree with your asessment 100% and I don't know her that well...

[wellstone_democrat]

70. I'm so very sorry

for your loss. This is the cruelest way. As others with more experience than me have said: this is about him and his demons. You didn't cause it and may, in fact, have delayed it for a long time. Remember your love in the good times because that is who you both were before he was overcome with his depression.

Take comfort in all of your communities at this time---real and virtual. Again, we are all so very sorry for you.

[flamingyouth]

169. Thank you for these wise words

Your post deeply touched me. Thank you. :hug:

[Missy Vixen]

57. Lisa, I am so, so sorry

We've never met, but I am across the lake...

If there's anything I can do, please let me know.

Again, I am so sorry.

Julie

[soleft]

69. You let us know what you need

I'm across the country, but if there's anything I can do.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

171. Thank you

The mod forum is my safe haven, and I love you guys down there so much. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

170. Thank you, Julie

You're a sweetheart and a dear friend. :hug:

[johnnie]

59. I am so saddened to hear this

My thoughts are with you. There is never an understanding of these things. Hang in there and take care.
Johnnie

[flamingyouth]

172. Thank you, Johnnie

:hug:

[Nikia]

60. I am so sorry

As others have already said, don't blame yourself. My condolescences to you, families, and friends.

[flamingyouth]

173. Thanks, Nikia

:hug:

[UrbScotty]

61. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm just speechless.

[tigereye]

63. so sorry FY

Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

[flamingyouth]

175. Thank you

And I love your sig. Brings a smile to this teary face. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

174. I know

Thanks for thinking of me. :hug:

[Just Me]

66. How terribly sad.

I hope you're okay. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

176. I am okay

thanks to the love of my dear friends. :hug: Thank you!

[Wapsie B]

67. Oh God, I am so sorry.

n/t

[flamingyouth]

178. Thank you

:hug:

[MaineDem]

71. I'm so sorry to read of your loss

I hope you can find comfort in family and friends. Make sure you take time for yourself now.

All the best to you. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

179. Thank you

this is all good advice, and I'm working on it. Thank you for your kindness. :hug:

[Vitruvius]

72. Depression is a disease -- and it is often fatal. Think twice before

you blame either your poor husband or yourself for what was almost surely a medical problem.

I am terribly sorry for your loss. Don't let it drag you down, and don't let it color your memories about what was good about your husband.

With deepest sympathy,

Vitruvius

[flamingyouth]

180. I know, Vitruvius

I tried for years to help him, to no avail. It breaks my heart that I couldn't, when I think of the good times we had together. But at least he is at peace. Thank you for your thoughts.

[SammyWinstonJack]

73. So terribly sorry!

I wish for you the strength to get through this very difficult time. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

181. Thank you so much

:hug:

[SammyWinstonJack]

332. I lost my husband 24 years ago

He died in a motorcycle accident and while that was hard to deal with, I can't begin to imagine what you will be facing. You have a great support group here. Please take care of yourself!

[eyesroll]

74. ((((Lisa))))

I'm sorry . :hug:

There really isn't anything I can say that can make this better, but please know we're here for you if you need us.

[flamingyouth]

182. Thank you, Stacie

You and Vince are good friends. :hug:

[Taverner]

75. OMG...that is horrible

I am so sorry...........there's nothing I can say........

Hugs your way......

[flamingyouth]

183. Thank you

for your support and hugs.:hug:

[Taverner]

187. Anytime FY

God (or Godess) be with you right now......

[belladonna]

76. I wish I had something to say that would help

But I'll just say I'm sorry :hug:

[flamingyouth]

184. It helps a lot

thank you :hug:

[Ellen Forradalom]

77. flamingyouth, I don't know you at all

but you have my deepest sympathy. I hope you find strength and peace now and in the months and years to come. Always come back for a sympathetic ear when you need it.

[flamingyouth]

185. Thank you for your kindness

I feel like you probably all know me a whole lot more now, for some reason.:hug:

[Ellen Forradalom]

268. I would've preferred getting to know you over a beer

Suicide is much too common. I lost a lover and friend to suicide, too, ten years ago. When all the insanity has died down and you are left alone with your own thoughts, come back here to your friends at DU.

[dawn]

78. Oh my God..I am so sorry for your loss.

:(

[flamingyouth]

186. Thank you for your kindness, Dawn

:hug:

[SnohoDem]

79. I am so sorry.

I know no words I can write will help. A loved one's suicide is so devastating for the survivors.

[flamingyouth]

188. Thank you

Your words mean a lot :hug:

[Magrittes Pipe]

80. Since I don't really know what to say...

I'll just :hug:

[flamingyouth]

191. Thank you

Like I said earlier, you guys are good friends. :hug:

[Lorien]

81. So very, very sorry Lisa

Please accept my deepest sympathies. :cry: :hug:

My father, a psychologist, has lost a number of patients over the years to suicide. Sometimes there is nothing-not loved ones, therapy, medications-nothing, that can help someone who is so deeply afflicted by the disease of mental illness. It can be every bit as incurable and fatal as cancer, and like cancer, there is no reason for blame.

Please take good care of yourself. You have our prayers.

Jen

[flamingyouth]

192. Thank you, Jen

You are totally right - and I appreciate what you wrote. :hug:

[Skittles]

82. Lisa, I am so sorry

my dad killed himself and I know the pain; PM if you need to, please.

[flamingyouth]

193. I'm so sorry about the loss of your father

I really feel for you, Skittles. Thank you for the offer. :hug:

[rasputin1952]

83. How totally devastating....

My heart and soul go out to you Lisa...:cry:

May you find Peace and Understanding during this time of extreme duress. there are few words that can be said during times like this; but if I may, please, find no blame for this incident in yourself or any of your actions.

You are a shining light here at DU. I have had the extreme pleasure of getting to know you on these boards, and I know that your heart is made of gold, and your soul of silver.

You are a wonderful person, and I send my hopes and prayers your way.

O8)

[flamingyouth]

195. Thank you, Ras

You are a wonderful friend and I think the world of you. Thank you for all of your kindness toward me. :hug:

[kimchi]

84. I'm so sorry Lisa.

Prayers on the way.

[flamingyouth]

196. Thanks, Kim

I feel so bad - I've owed you a PM forever! :hug:

[Lydia Leftcoast]

85. How devastating for you!

My thoughts and prayers will be with you, and please remember that nothing you could have done would have prevented this.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

197. Thank you for saying that

I really believe it. :hug:

[Solly Mack]

86. You're in my thoughts.

((((((((((((((())))))))))))))))))))

[flamingyouth]

198. Thanks, Solly Mack

:hug:

[buddhamama]

87. oh dear

i am sooo sorry! how truly tragic.

poor troubled soul. :-(

my heart goes out to you, Lisa.
May you find some solace in his peace.
My thoughts are with you. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

199. Thank you so much

You are very sweet :hug:

[FizzFuzz]

88. sending prayers of support and courage

I haven't met you but please know you are in my thoughts. I can't imagine...I'm so very sorry.

[flamingyouth]

200. I can use them - thanks!

:hug:

[Maeve]

89. Prayers for you and all involved

May you feel the warmth flowing out to you from so many. My deepest condolences.
:grouphug:

[flamingyouth]

201. Thank you Cathy

You're a sweetheart - I really miss you in the mod forum. :hug:

[NoPasaran]

90. I'm so sorry flamingyouth

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

202. Thank you for your kindness

:hug:

[CanuckAmok]

91. So very sorry, Flamingyouth.

Not sure if you know, but I'm going through the same thing myself, although Mrs. Amok's chosen method of suicide will take her years to complete.

And I've been in your husband's position, too, but luckily had some good people (even here on DU) talk me down off the ledge.

If there's anything I can do for you, your family, or your husband's family, just ask.


on edit: check yur PMs

[flamingyouth]

204. I'm so sorry for what you're going through

And I'm still working through my PMs (bless this group for overwhelming me with them today - what a great bunch of people DUers are). Thank you for everything you've said and offered. :hug:

[SarahB]

92. I am so sorry.

There are no words. Please accept whatever support you can get right now. You have so much to deal with to heal.
Take care, and again, I'm very sorry. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

205. Thank you

I can't tell you how crappy I feel over the things I've said about him lately. But he frightened me so much, and I thought he was violent - now I know he was. :cry:

[ikojo]

344. Flamingyouth....please do not beat yourself up over words

said out of fear. You had EVERY reason to feel the way you did. Your husband death does not change what was going on at that time.

Left untreated, depression is as deadly as heart disease or cancer.

:grouphug:

[RiffRandell]

93. I'm very sorry. n/t

[flamingyouth]

206. Thank you

:hug:

[StaggerLee]

94. My condolences, prayers and thoughts

I can't imagine what you are going through right now.

I hope he found peace.

[flamingyouth]

207. Thank you for your kind words - I hope he did too

:hug:

[hyphenate]

95. That's a terrible shock

Remember there are people here who will listen if you want them to.

[flamingyouth]

210. It really was a horrible shock

Thank you for your kind words. :hug:

[Lestat]

96. Sorry to hear that, flamingyouth.

You will be in my thoughts. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

212. Thanks Lestat

:hug:

[drumwolf]

97. for your husband.....

[flamingyouth]

214. Thanks

:hug:

[No2W2004]

98. Very sorry to hear that.

Take time for yourself.

[flamingyouth]

215. Thank you for your kindness

:hug:

[CatWoman]

99. Hugs, Lisa

Hugs.

:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[flamingyouth]

216. Thank you for everything, Midori

(And you didn't need to delete that thread earlier, I thought it was pretty funny). :loveya::hug:

[ScreamingMeemie]

100. Oh god Lisa, I cannot think of anything to say...

Except that I am thinking of you and sending along hugs and thoughts.

:(

Know that this is not your fault.

Love, Laura

[flamingyouth]

217. Laura, you are such a good friend

And you're an amazing person. I love you very much. :hug:

[CO Liberal]

101. I'm Speechless

All of us here at DU are here for you, Lisa. This is a community of caring people.

Wayne
(CO Liberal)

[flamingyouth]

219. Thanks, Wayne

And you're right - I am blown away by the reponse here from everyone. I am blessed to be a part of this amazing community. :hug:

[boobooday]

102. Oh no

I'm so sorry.

May you find strength with the help of good friends.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

220. Thank you, boobooday

I'm surrounded by love. :hug:

[Harrumph]

103. I'm so sorry to hear this....

you are in my thoughts. :hug::hug::hug:

[flamingyouth]

221. Thank you, and bless your heart

:hug:

[slinkerwink]

104. oh my god! I'm so very sorry to hear that :-(

[flamingyouth]

222. Thanks, slink

:loveya:

[Dees]

105. I'm very sorry.

[flamingyouth]

224. Thank you

:)

[Bossy Monkey]

106. Here also with shock, condolences, support n/t

[flamingyouth]

225. Thank you so much

:hug:

[Gothic Sponge]

107. OMG!

I'm so sorry!

[flamingyouth]

226. Thank you

:hug:

[Athletic Grrl]

122. Lisa

Sending good thoughts and wishes (and a prayer if you are into that) for you at this awful time.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

228. Thank you, OaktownGrrl

I appreciate it. And go A's! :D

[mopaul]

135. be brave....you'll get through this.......n/t

[flamingyouth]

229. Thanks, mopaul

I shall make it through

[WindRavenX]

140. Oh jeezuz

Flamingyouth, you are in my thoughts :(
If there is ANYTHING that we can do to help, please don't hesitate to ask.
::hugs::

[flamingyouth]

230. Thank you so much for your kindness

Bless your heart :hug:

[CrownPrinceBandar]

143. I too am without words....................

Sorry isn't strong enough. No need to respond to this, just get some rest and stay healthy.

Sean

[flamingyouth]

231. Thank you Sean

:hug:

[andino]

162. I'm so sorry

I just don't know what to say...

[flamingyouth]

232. I know

What can anyone say? Thank you for thinking of me. :hug:

[bubblesby2002]

177. I am so sorry flamingyouth

my husband killed himself as well - it just took him longer than a moment. I know some of what you're going through. Please don't feel any guilt.:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

[flamingyouth]

233. Thank you Bubbles

For your post and your PM. I will get back to you later. Let's talk soon. I'm so sorry for your own loss. Lots of love to you. :hug:

[Fovea]

189. Be Strong

And be well.

[flamingyouth]

234. Thank you

:hug:

[Cheswick2.0]

190. Lisa...so sorry

So sorry to hear about this. Please don't feel you have to answer this post.

I just wanted to say I don't know what your husband's issue was but I can imagine. I am sure you did every single thing you could to help him and he just couldn't or wouldn't get the help he needed. I am sure you will go through many emotions and everyone of them will be instructive. I won't tell you "don't think this" or "don't feel that", because it wouldn't do any good.
But I hope you will find the way you need to deal with what has happened. Perhaps a suicide survivors group?

[flamingyouth]

235. I did do everything I could

But he was too sick and too far gone. At least I know that he is at peace now - or at least I hope so.

Thank you for posting and for thinking of me. :hug:

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

194. Oh my God. I was there myself once, but did not take the

final jump. Don't know why some do and some don't.
I am very sorry for your loss.

[flamingyouth]

236. I'm grateful that you're still here with us

You are loved by many - please don't ever forget that. :hug:

[Paragon]

203. Jesus.

Prayers for you & everyone's families.

[flamingyouth]

Thanks, Paragon

:hug:

[kymar57]

208. Deepest sympathies FY

I have no idea the pain you must be in. My prayers are for you.

[flamingyouth]

238. Thanks kymar57

Right now it's not so much pain, but detachment and disbelief. I'm sure the crushing pain comes later. Thank you. :hug:

[Capn Sunshine]

209. I send you Love

and hope you emerge from this dark place. You're a good good person and I'm sorry this happened.

[flamingyouth]

239. Thank you so much

And thanks for your PM - I will be down in So Cal soon. Let's get together for that drink. I need it. :hug:

[tilsammans]

211. (((Lisa)))

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

240. Thank you so much, tilsammans

:hug:

[name not needed]

213. I'm so sorry

You have my deepest sympathies.

[flamingyouth]

241. Thank you

:hug:

[FarLeftRage]

223. I am so very sorry and sad to hear this.

You have my prayers and hugs. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

242. Thanks - I can use those

:hug:

[sus]

227. oh Lisa...I am so sorry...

[flamingyouth]

243. Thanks, sus

You're swell :hug:

[sundog]

237. For what it's worth...

I send you my best. I am relatively new here, but I admire your courage to open up unconditionally to everyone, even those you don't know.

Someone once told me when I first experienced grief: "This too will pass..."

[flamingyouth]

244. The person who told you that was very wise

I'm glad you posted here, and I appreciate your thoughts. We are a wonderful family here at DU. I hope you never experience something horrible like this while you're here with us, but if you do, you have an amazing support system among the kindest and most amazing people in the world. Be well, and enjoy yourself at DU. :hug:

[NMDemDist2]

245. i was so shocked at your post this morning

I had to pass it by, I could think of nothing to say

Now I can say that I am so sorry and my best wishes and prayers go out to you in this dreadful time.

[LWolf]

246. I will add mine to yours.

:grouphug:

[flamingyouth]

248. Thank you

I know how you felt - I've been there myself. There's really nothing anyone can say, but your thoughts mean a lot to me. :hug: Thanks!

[NMDemDist2]

251. I had to add my condolences when I saw you were here

this morning I thought you'd be gone for most of the day dealing with things.

I'm so glad DU gives you support and love and a place to come if you need anyone or anything :hug:

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

247. HOLY FUCKING SHIT

You don't deserve this. My first impulse is to call your late husband a jackass, but, as others said, it seems to have been an illness.

If you find yourself alone, feel free to pour your heart out here at the Lounge. To keep your soul-clock ticking. Online interaction is not impersonal or cold, there are real people behind these words.

Here's a few :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

Hang on tight, FY.

[flamingyouth]

270. Thanks

I appreciate all you've said. :hug:

[MrsMatt]

249. Words cannot express my

my sadness with your loss. Please just know that you are in the thoughts of many here (and in my case, you are also in my prayers).

Marie

[flamingyouth]

271. Thank you so much, Marie

:hug:

[Khephra]

250. Oh gods....

My love is with you. I don't know what else to say.

[flamingyouth]

272. Thanks, Kef

What you've said means so much. :hug:

[djeseru]

252. My sympathies.

Will hope for the best for you.

[flamingyouth]

273. Thank you

I appreciate it. :hug:

[Flaxbee]

253. I am so, so sorry.

I am just so sorry. The heartache of deciding to divorce, and then the heartbreak of this. You have many friends here, it sounds like you are OK and know - you must know this deep in your soul - that you are NOT to blame. Get through this as best you can, and lean on everyone here as much as you need to.

[flamingyouth]

274. Thanks so much

Yes, it has been heartbreaking - all of it - believe me. I just hope that Alan is finally at peace. I know he never had peace while he lived on earth, and that eats me up.

[Flaxbee]

325. I hope Alan finally has some peace, too.

Everyone gets depressed now and then, but the kind of depression that leads to suicide is almost unfathomable. My father is a psychiatrist, and while that doesn't qualify me as one, we always talked a lot as a family about mental health issues and survivors sometimes destroy themselves with guilt. Some people just can't find peace -- the world can be a rough place -- and while you can grieve for that, don't blame yourself.

But you can take care of yourself. Grab all the support you need. Again, I am so sorry.

[Kat45]

254. Oh my! I am so sorry to hear this.

I don't quite know what to say. Be kind to yourself; kindness, and love are things you need in abundance right now. You are blessed to have family and friends surrounding you amidst this tragedy.

[flamingyouth]

275. Thank you so much

The love I've received from my friends and family now is so nourishing. You've all been a blessing. :hug:

[peacefreak]

255. flamingyouth, my heart goes out to you.

I am so sorry.

[flamingyouth]

276. Thank you, peasfreak

:hug:

[darkstar]

256. Another DUuer w/out proper words

So terribly sorry that this has happened to you. Let the love and support around you lift you up as you move into the future. If there is not enough your immediate world, you obviously have it here at DU. Don't feel guilty leaning on anyone. And as someone said above, no need tprespond with your astonishing graciousness you demonstrated above. Just know that you are in the thoughts and prayers of still one more.

Blessings.

[flamingyouth]

277. I appreciate your kindness toward me

It really means so much. :hug:

[Mobius]

257. I am very sorry for your loss.

My friend / ex husband tried to kill himself about 5 weeks ago. I realize how lucky I am, that he is still with us. I cannot even begin to imagine what you must be going through. I don't know what else to say. It is such a tremendous loss, anything I say will seem not enough.
Take Care of Yourself
Mobius

[flamingyouth]

279. Thank you, Mobius

And I'm so sorry to hear of your trouble with your ex-husband. I hope and pray that he will find the strength to remain among us for the rest of his natural days. :hug:

[PartyPooper]

258. I am so sorry.

Sending you my deepest sympathy and condolences!

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

280. Thank you, Party Pooper

:hug:

[silverlib]

259. Once again - there are no words...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and family.

[flamingyouth]

281. Thank you for your thoughtfulness, silverlib

:hug:

[Maestro]

261. I am extremely and profoundly sorry for what happened.

I cannot imagine what you may feel right now. People do unimaginable things sometimes and there are no words that can describe why. Time will heal. My sympathies.

[flamingyouth]

282. Thank you so much

I don't even know what I feel now. I cannot definen it, only that I am bathing in a never-ending pool of love and friendship here on DU and it is sustaining me. :hug:

[SCRUBDASHRUB]

262. So very sorry, Lisa. My thoughts and prayers go out to you

at this very difficult time.

[flamingyouth]

283. Thanks, hon

:hug:

[SmileyBoy]

263. Oh my God, I'm soooo sorry to hear that.

I hope things can get better for you soon.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

284. Thanks, northwest

:hug:

[Donkeyboy75]

264. Another inadequate post

letting you know I'm thinking of you today. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

287. Thank you

And your kind thoughts could never be considered inadequate.:hug:

[goclark]

265. So sorry

Even though you were going through a divorce you still feel the pain and remember the love that you once had together.

I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

[flamingyouth]

288. Thank you, ewagner

I appreciate your thoughts and kindness.:hug:

[ewagner]

266. Perhaps belated

but please accept my deepest sympathies.

It is at least heartening that you have so many friends who care about you in the DU community.

Thoughts and love coming your way from Wisconsin :hug:

[flamingyouth]

289. Thank you so much

And it's not at all belated. :hug:

[lpbk2713]

267. Please accept my deepest regrets and heartfelt sympathies.

A divorce is enough of a traumatic experience, but this must be almost too much to bear. I wish you strength and endurance. Peace be with you.

[flamingyouth]

290. Thank you

I'm receiving amazing strength here from my DU friends like you.:hug:

[mac56]

285. Lisa, I am so sorry.

I echo the other posters: nothing we can say here is adequate, but please know that people send their thoughts and prayers.

[flamingyouth]

291. Thank you, mac56, for your kindness

and for thinking of me. :hug:

[WillyBrandt]

286. I am so so so sorry

Please, please, please console yourself with friends and family. You likely have some that you trust, and they are there for you--please let them help and console and simple hang out with and talk to you.

I can't think of anything more to say; only know that many anonymous folks on this board extend their deepest sympathies. I am one of them.

Try, as best as you can, to be well

[flamingyouth]

292. Thanks, WillyBrandt

:hug:

[aljones]

293. I am so sorry!!

If you or your family need anything please be sure to let me know!!

ally

[flamingyouth]

298. Thanks Ally

Please leave an extra woowoo outside my door. :loveya:

[aljones]

306. You can have as many woowoos as you want!!

ally

[redwitch]

294. I am so sorry

Words are damned inadequate, I wish I had some to help. Hold on to good memories and the people who love you. You will get through and your DU friends will hold you in our hearts in the days to come. There will always be someone here to listen.
-Redwitch

[flamingyouth]

299. Thanks Redwitch

Your kindness is appreciated beyond words.:hug:

[AlFrankenFan]

295. I'm so sorry to hear that

My condolences, Lisa :cry: :grouphug:

[flamingyouth]

300. Thank you

I love your sig pics - they made me smile :hug:

[bleedingheart]

296. I am so sorry.

How absolutely devastating, please know that we are there for you.

Sending support and hugs your way!

bleedingheart

[flamingyouth]

301. Thank you, bleedingheart

I hope things are okay with your husband - please let us know. I've been thinking of you both.:hug:

[NightTrain]

297. My deepest condolences!

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

302. Thanks, NightTrain

I've got Otis on tonight. And nothing beats my main man.:hug:

[NightTrain]

305. Otis Redding has gotten me through many a dark night of the soul.

His slow stuff in particular has a healing effect on me. "These Arms of Mine," "Pain In My Heart," "I've Been Loving You Too Long," "My Lover's Prayer," "I've Got Dreams To Remember," and of course, "Dock of the Bay."

Hang in there, FY! Your friends at DU are here for you if you need us! :hi:

[KeepHopeAlive]

303. I'm so sorry

May you find the strength and courage you need to guide you through your healing journey. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

304. Thank you

I'm working on that - very hard. :hug:

[ulysses]

307. oh jesus!

I'm so sorry to hear it. We're thinking of you.

[flamingyouth]

315. Thanks ulysses

:hug:

[NashVegas]

308. I'm So Sorry

hopefully he's in a place where ...

Don't blame yourself. Try not to hate him.

[flamingyouth]

316. I know, Mary

I hope he's there too. :hug: thank you :hug:

[JohnLocke]

309. Lisa:

I'm sorry for your loss. Please accept my sincere condolences in these times. :hug::hug:

- John

[flamingyouth]

317. Thank you, John

:hug:

[Eloriel]

310. Unimaginable.

I'm so sorry you or anyone has to go through this.

I can only repeeat what others have said: please don't for a minute ever entertain the notion that there was anything you could've done, and please take care of yourself by getting and allowing the support from any and every direction possible. Here, family and friends, grief counseling and support groups -- whatever.

Blessings and hugs,

Eloriel

[flamingyouth]

318. Thank you, Eloriel

Your kindness means so much to me.:hug:

[Mr. McD]

311. My thoughts are with you

My wife's oldest son, committed suicide, it was devastating for her. You and his family don't have to go through it alone. My wife found a survivors support group. It was a great help. Here is one in your area. There may be others.

Survivors of Suicide
12044 59th Avenue South
Seattle, WA 98178
Contact:
Coralie Reid [phone]

[flamingyouth]

319. I'm so sorry about your wife's son

I cannot imagine ever losing a child, much less to suicide. Your poor, poor wife. Thank you for this contact. I was just thinking that I would do research like this soon. What a nice thing to offer me. Thanks!
Lisa

[davsand]

312. I'm sorry isn't enough.

I'd like to be there to offer a hug or even just quiet comfort--sometimes on line friendships seem so inadequate to the needs they encounter--you know?

I want to urge you to be very careful about your own feelings and emotional well being in the upcoming months. Please consider talking to someone even IF you don't think you are having issues dealing with his suicide. I know it sounds odd, but everyone who was around him is at an elevated risk for depression for quite some time.

I learned this first hand when we lost a friend to suicide a couple of years ago. I honestly had no idea how much that particular type of loss impacts everyone in the circle. Had I not met with a grief counselor along with several of his other friends I'd have never realized how huge this kind of thing can be.

May your path brighten soon, and may he find the peace now that eluded him.

Laura

[flamingyouth]

320. Thanks, Laura

One thing that's so heartbreaking to me about this thread is how many people have lost loved ones to suicide. It's incredibly tragic that people don't know how valued and loved they are. Thank you for your kind words and sage advice - I much appreciate it. :hug:

[BigMcLargehuge]

313. Oh jeez....

I am so sorry.

Let me know if there is anything I can do.

[flamingyouth]

322. Thanks Big

Write me another Oompa Loompa song really soon.:hug: That will help. :D

[BigMcLargehuge]

328. consider it done

watch for the alert!


(heading to GD now... got me some troll hunting to do I guess)

[BigMcLargehuge]

333. enjoy

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=104&topic_id=1780428&mesg_id=1780851

[flamingyouth]

337. Hee hee hee

Never ceases to crack me up. I needed that now, Big. :hug:

[BigMcLargehuge]

340. anything for a friend in need

call on my anytime for anything and I'll do what i can. Try and keep your chin up.

:hug:

[x-g.o.p.er]

314. Oh, my God...

My prayers are with you.

[flamingyouth]

323. Thanks x-g.o.p.er

:hug:

[tishaLA]

321. Wow I'm so sorry to hear this

my heartfelt sympathies to you.

[flamingyouth]

324. Thank you, tishaLA

:hug:

[ornotna]

326. Oh my God! I'm so sorry

I do hope you're ok.

[flamingyouth]

327. Thanks, notawol

I'm okay so far. I appreciate your thoughts.:hug:

[AlGore-08.com]

329. I'm very sorry to hear of your incredible loss.

Please take care of yourself.

[flamingyouth]

330. Thanks

:hug:

[Bride of Cthulhu]

331. I am so sorry.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

338. Thanks

:hug:

[ikojo]

334. OMG, Flamingyouth....I am SO sorry you are

going through this right now.


I offer you a hug. I hope it helps. I lost a brother to suicide in July 2001. I know the pain and unanswered questions left behind by suicide.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

339. And I'm so sorry for the loss of your brother

:hug: Thank you for your kindness.

[Terran]

335. Oh god

<hug> I don't know what to say. Sorry won't cut it. We're here for you.

[flamingyouth]

341. Thanks, Dirk

I appreciate your thoughts. :hug:

[yardwork]

336. I am so sorry. Please take good care of yourself.

It's not your fault. I am so sorry for your loss, though.

[flamingyouth]

342. Thank you

I know it's not my fault, but I have so many emotions running around my brain now, it's hard to sort them all out.:hug:

[mitchum]

343. Peace be with you, flamingyouth

my heart goes out to you for your loss

[flamingyouth]

371. Thank you mitchum

:hug:

[amandae]

345. I am so sorry!!

My thoughts are with you at this extremely difficult time .... :hug: :hug: :hug: If there's anything at all that I can do, please let me know.

[flamingyouth]

372. Thank you, Amanda

And thank you for your wonderful PM. :hug:

[salin]

346. How traumatic, tragic, and devastating

Lisa, you have my utmost sympathy and condolences. The multiple levels of shock, grief, (unfounded) guilt, among other gut-wrenching emotions must be pulling you in many directions. I hope that you find many (physical not just cyber) shoulders to lean on to help you sort through these emotions - so that you don't take it all yourself which would only serve to triple the trauma over time. Perhaps there is some peace knowing that his own personal torment has been eased - but sadly some of it (as is nearly inevitable in suicide) is easily transfered to those who are close and left behind. For now - find the support to just get through the short term, to just cope... then soon, find the support that you need to help you begin to heal.

I send you my deepest sympathies, condolences, and wishes for you to find some safe harbor through this truamatic storm. You are in my prayers.

[flamingyouth]

373. Thank you for your kindness

And this wonderful message.:hug:

[salin]

389. I only wish

that there was more that I could do then send warm thoughts, prayers, and hopes that you find all the support possible.. not just today and tomorrow, but always. :hug:

[ZenLefty]

347. I'm heartbroken just hearing about this.

Lisa, you're such a good person, and everyone around you feels the goodness that just radiates out from you. I'm very sorry you have to go through this. Please let us know if there's anything we can do for you.

[flamingyouth]

353. Thank you, Zen

You and I have worked together here for a long time. Thank you for all the kindness you've always shown me and for the wonderful things you've said. I think I've all run out of things to say now, but I am completely overwhelmed by everyone's responses here, and I love you all so much. :loveya:

[nemo137]

348. i'm so sorry. i really don't know what else to say.

[flamingyouth]

374. No one knows what to say

But thank you for being here.:hug:

[GoddessOfGuinness]

349. My god...how awful!

:hug:I'm so sorry for your loss, Lisa. :hug:
How sad that he was so tragically disturbed...It must tear at your heart.

I can't send enough of these to you :hug:, but please know that while they're only little icons, they're sent from the deepest part of my heart. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

375. No, I can't get too many hugs right now

Bless your heart for adding to them.:hug:

[angee_is_mad]

350. My prayers are with you

and your family.

[flamingyouth]

376. Thank you for your prayers and thoughtfulness

:hug:

[traco]

351. I'm fairly new here

So you dont know me. But I am very sorry to hear of your loss.

I will remember you in my prayers.

[flamingyouth]

377. Thank you for your prayers

And welcome to DU - I'm glad you're here. :hug:

[traco]

401. Thank you flamingyouth

How are you holding up today? I hope your ok. Here is a big hug from a new friend:hug:

[flamingyouth]

406. I'm holding up okay

I went to yoga class and they dedicated their practice to me, which was wonderful. On my way out, a young woman handed me a note which said that her boyfriend had killed himself two weeks ago, and that if I wanted to meet with her or talk, she'd be there for me. So I am overwhelmed by support and so grateful for our community here.
Thanks again! :hug:

[latebloomer]

352. This is so tragic

I am so very sorry. It sounds like you did all you could but when someone is that disturbed it is impossible to save him. Please continue to take care of yourself and let your friends and family care for you as well. You sound like a wonderful person with an excellent support system.

Love and Peace-

lb

[flamingyouth]

378. Thank you for everything

:hug:

[No Passaran]

354. Sorry for your loss

I'm just staring at this screen. I don't really know what to say to make you feel better other than "I'm trully sorry".

[flamingyouth]

379. I appreciate your thoughts

It means a lot to me.:hug:

[neverborn]

355. Stay Strong!!

I'm very sorry, my thoughts go out to you this night.

[flamingyouth]

380. I'm trying!

Sometimes I am strong, then a huge wave of grief just washes over me. Today is actually harder than yesterday. Thank you.:hug:

[kayleybeth]

356. So sorry...

May good memories comfort you.

[flamingyouth]

381. Thank you, kayleybeth

:hug:

[puerco-bellies]

357. I am sorry for your loss.

He made that terrible decision, do not harbor guilt for another's actions. Peace to you.
p-b

[flamingyouth]

382. Thank you for your message

:hug:

[ronzo]

358. Aw shit.

Not sure what to say FY. Our thoughts are with you for sure.....

[flamingyouth]

383. I know, Ron

No one knows what to say, including me. :hug: Thanks, friend.

[SoCalDem]

359. How sad.. I am very sorry for your family's loss..

It's so sad when people take their own lives..A dear friend of ours killed himself on his daughter's 13th birthday.. I am sure he was so distraught that he did not realize it, but he ended up ruining her birthday for all time..

Please do see a counsellor ...often.. Sometimes the shock lasts a long time, and you might think you are "better", and then wham..it hits you again..:(

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

384. Thanks so much

I know what that "wham" can feel like. It's amazing how many people here have been touched by suicide. Thank you for your kindness.:hug:

[Awsi Dooger]

360. That's just terrible, but thank you for trusting DUers in a time of need

My deepest heartfelt sympathy, Lisa. I am learning of this very late and really don't know what to add, other than my father spent a lifetime in the field and has always stressed the benefits of counseling in the event of a suicide or family tragedy.

I am extremely impressed by the advice and overwhelming support of DUers in this thread. Just a few days ago I learned of the murder of a very close friend of mine, who I once mentioned on DU, but I have been hesitant to post details here, including how devastated I am. This thread has encouraged me that a DU post may help, once I get more details.

[flamingyouth]

385. I'm so sorry to hear about your friend

And thank you for reaching out to me during your own time of grief. :hug:

[doubleplusgood]

361. I am so sorry to hear this

I don't know what to say, but please know that my thoughts are with you.

Joe

[flamingyouth]

386. Thank you Joe

:hug:

[TrogL]

362. PM if you need a shoulder - my wife...

(clarification, for lack of a better word)

...well, she died...we're still not sure what exactly happened.

It was over 20 years ago.

[flamingyouth]

387. I'm sorry, TrogL

I didn't know about your wife. Thank you for your support. :hug:

[bearfan454]

363. Very sorry to hear that

God bless you and your family.

[flamingyouth]

388. Thank you bearfan

:hug:

[bluestateguy]

364. I'm terribly sorry

That's just awful.

[flamingyouth]

390. Yes, it is

thank you :hug:

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

365. Oh my dear God I am so sorry, Flamingyouth

My prayers and thoughts are with you 1000%!!!

[flamingyouth]

391. Thanks for thinking of me and for the support

:hug:

[Amaya]

366. So incredibly sorry, Lisa

You have my deepest most heartfelt sympathies.

[flamingyouth]

392. Thank you, Amaya

:hug:

[burythehatchet]

367. I'm sorry for your loss

I hope that he and all who loved him are able to find peace.

[flamingyouth]

393. Thank you

I hope he is at peace at last. :hug:

[Tom_Foolery]

368. My condolences to you and yours. n/t

[flamingyouth]

394. Thanks

:hug:

[WillParkinson]

369. Oh, sweets I am SO sorry!

For you and his family. Please accept our condolences.

[flamingyouth]

395. Thank you so much, Will

Thank you for your condolences.:hug:

[uncle ray]

370. i'm also very sorry to hear that

though i don't know you, i've dealt with a similar situation, i know how alone you might feel now, you can never have too many people share their condolences. so sorry. all i can say is to be strong.

you're such a doll for all the personal responses!

[flamingyouth]

396. Thank you for thinking of me

I do feel alone, even though I am surrounded by love here. I know that time will heal, and I am blessed with wonderful friends. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.:hug:

[Kukesa]

397. Hugs for you, flamingyouth,

and may you find peace, too.

I'm terribly sorry; please accept my condolences.

[flamingyouth]

409. Thanks, Kukesa

I appreciate those hugs more than you could ever know. :hug:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

398. Just want to remind you, I am around today

if you need to talk...I'm pretty sure you aren't at home and don't know if you took my cell number with you...PM me if you didn't with your folk's number and I'll call you there if you need to talk.

You are in my thoughts ...very much so.

and here's your morning hug
:hug:

[flamingyouth]

407. Thanks - I'll be at my parents' house tonight

and I'll pm you their number. I should be back home tomorrow, then the parade of visiting friends begins.:hug:

[FuriousMNDem]

399. Oh my........................

:wtf:

This is terrible, indeed.

My condolences, for sure.

[flamingyouth]

410. Yes, WTF? indeed

I've been asking myself the very same for the past day. Such a waste. Thank you for your condolences, friend.:hug:

[MissMillie]

400. Oh my goodness that's just horrible

Let us know if we can help you in any way. I'm sure this is very difficult for you. My heart goes out to you.

[flamingyouth]

411. Thank you so much, Mary

:hug:

[Crewleader]

402. Words can not express my emotions....

you have my deepest sympathy. It's a comfort that NSMA is close by to you, she's a wonderful person and friend.
I lost my sister the same way taking her life,
it's a very difficult time and my heart goes out to you.

Many hugs Lisa!

You are in my prays friend...:hug:

[flamingyouth]

408. Thank you so much, my dear friend

:hug:

[scarlet_owl]

403. I'm so sorry to hear this.

You have my prayers and hugs. :hug:

[IconoclastIlene]

404. I am terribly sorry; take it easy on yourself.

No one should have to shoulder such a tragedy.

I am sorry.

Ilene

[flamingyouth]

413. Thank you, Ilene

I'm blessed with a never-ending support stream. Thank you so much for your thoughts.:hug:

[flamingyouth]

412. Thank you, scarlet_owl

:hug:

[brook]

405. My heart...

joins you in the sorrow of today and in the hope of the better tomorrows that are waiting for you. Be gentle with yourself.
You are in so many prayers and thoughts.:hug:

[flamingyouth]

414. Thank you, sweet brook

:hug:

[indigo32]

415. Lisa I am so sorry

I have no words.
:hug:

[flamingyouth]

417. Thank you, Sue

You're a good friend.:hug:

[jakefrep]

416. Sorry to hear about this...

My condolences and prayers to you & your family.

[flamingyouth]

418. Thank you, jakefrep

And welcome to DU. Thank you for posting on this thread.:hug:

[Penndems]

419. OMG, I'm so shocked and sorry to hear this

Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

427. Thank you so much, penndems

:hug:

[Only Me]

420. I just saw this....My heart goes out to you. You are in my Prayers. n/t

[flamingyouth]

428. Thank you so much

I really appreciate it. :hug:

[TheWizardOfMudd]

421. I've been trying to think of words to type

But I can't. Just take care and don't blame yourself.

[flamingyouth]

429. Thank you

I deeply appreciate it. :hug:

[Furity]

422. I'm so sorry

I truly am....for you and family.

~Furity

[flamingyouth]

430. Thank you, Furity

:hug:

[ALago1]

423. So sorry

Will be thinking about you hoping that you make it through this tough time...

[flamingyouth]

431. Thank you

:hug:

[fortyfeetunder]

424. My condolences

Wishing you many days of healing to get you through this time.
I PM'd you...Take care.

[flamingyouth]

432. Thank you for this and for the PM

I'm behind in that department, but I will get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks so much.:hug:

[Tom Kitten]

425. I'm very sorry to hear

I'm so sorry to hear this, I just logged in this weekend,my heart and sympathies go out to you. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers...

[flamingyouth]

433. Thank you, countfloyd

He really would have loved your username and avatar.:D

[ncrainbowgrrl]

426. Oh god. I'm SO sorry.

Suicide is hard on those left behind. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this time, and wish that I could say/do something to make it okay... Take care of yourself. We're all thinking about you, and pulling for you and your family!

[flamingyouth]

434. Thank you, you've always been so nice here on DU

:hug:

[sadiesworld]

435. I am so sorry for your loss.

I don't post much in the lounge so I just saw your sad news. Please accept my condolences. Also, I am relieved that you are PHYSICALLY okay, depression and anger can be a scary mix...

Take care of yourself :hug:

[flamingyouth]

444. Thank you

Yes, the sad thing is that I was very afraid of him during those last days. Still, it doesn't change the fact that I did love him very much. It's a bizarre mish-mash of emotions.

Thank you so much.:hug:

[noiretextatique]

436. i'm so very sorry

if you need an understanding ear, please feel free to PM me. i had a similar experience several years ago. just remember: it's not your fault ((((((flamingyouth))))))).

[flamingyouth]

445. Thank you, noiretblu

I will PM you. And I'm so sorry for what you went through - far too many of us have been in this scary dark place.:hug:

[Champ]

437. You have my support

There is not much more I can say to make you feel any better about this. :hug:

[flamingyouth]

446. What you said is perfect

And exactly what I needed to hear.:hug:

[VOX]

438. I'm so very sorry. Don't try to carry the pain alone...

That's simply too big a burden. I'm certain you'll seek out a counselor or clergy to help you in this time of great need.

Do not hesitate to let your DU cohorts know how you're doing and what you're feeling.

You are in my fondest thoughts -- in some very small way, I hope that can bring a measure of peace to you --

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

447. Thank you

Yes, I have a counselor and a huge group of friends who are keeping me very busy and are helping a whole hell of a lot.

Next Monday I'm going to my first Survivors of Suicide support group, and I'm really looking forward to it.

Thank you for thinking of me - it means so much.:hug:

[BlondieK143]

439. I am so sorry!

You're in my thoughts and prayers and you are certainly not alone in this. :hug: Hang in there.

[flamingyouth]

448. Thank you, honey

:hug:

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

440. I'm so sorry!!!

I have been out of town and didn't read this until this morning. There are no words to express my shock and sorrow at your news. God bless you and the rest of your family. Take care.

[flamingyouth]

449. Thank you for your kindness

And your wonderful words of comfort. :hug:

[zbird]

441. So sorry flamingyouth.

I just now came upon this thread. You know you have lots of friends at DU who will always be here for you. May you have the strength to get you through.

:hug:

[flamingyouth]

450. Thank you

And I'm working on that strength - I owe much of it to kind people like you right here at DU. :yourock:

[PAMod]

442. My deepest condolences, flamingyouth.

[flamingyouth]

451. Thank you, PAMod

:hug:

[LincolnMcGrath]

443. Lots if love from all us here in the LIMAC household

I am truly sorry.

[flamingyouth]

452. Thank you so much

:hug:

[Book Lover]

453. I am so sorry

You know we all support you. You are in my thoughts.