Dumb-Ass things you've done. (Tech Folks will LOVE mine!)

[BlueJazz]

Well, I don't know if they'll love it but they'll be in awe of my stupidity....

First of all, years ago, when you turned off your windows computer a message popped-up that said "it is now safe to turn off your computer".....Anyway, one night I stayed up late (about 5:00AM) working on my MCSE (windows certification) and also had the cable tv on so I wouldn't get to squirrelly studying for the Microsoft tests.
So, at 5 AM I decided that it was about time to pack it in cause I was getting drop-dead tired.......I turned off the computer and got up and stood by the TV waiting about 15 seconds for the message: "It is now safe to turn off your TV".....Geez!!!

Anybody else had a "weird moment" like that? (or hopefully worse!)

[Lavender Brown]

1. I once checked the time

(on my wristwatch) and spilled some of the drink I was holding in that hand onto my lap.

[jeff30997]

4. It happened to me too.

Ouch!The coffee was hooot!!!

[DEMVET-USMC]

21. I have done that a few times myself. Time check, OH SH.. ! !

[Kadie]

2. I tried to open an elevator door with the button on my key ring

that unlocks my car. Took several pushes before I realized why the elevator door wasn't opening.

I was very tired at the time.

[scarlet_owl]

3. I got stuck in a swing designed for infants when I was 10.

The worst part was when my sister left me hanging there in the playground while she went to get my mother. When my mom got there, all she could do was laugh.

[lpbk2713]

5. The waitress at Pizza Hut told me "Look out for that plate, it's hot."

You guessed it......... I reached right for the plate and picked it up. It just doesn't take me very long to feel a plate.

[CO Liberal]

6. April 1995....Kingman, Arizona

My wife and I were moving from Nevada to Colorado, and had to stop in Kingman because of the weather. We were driving a Hertz/Penske truck, with our Plymouth Sundance on a tow dolly behind us.

We pulled in to the motel parking lot and got settled in - then I took the Sundance off the dolly to go get dinner at a Chinese restaurant down the road. I parked the Sundance in another space, figuring that we could get it back on the dolly in the morning.

Next morning, we packed our stuff back into the truck and got ready to hit the road again. I told my wife to drive the Sundance and follow me to a vacant lot that I had passed the night before, where we could put the car back on the dolly.

I needed to pull a pin out to lower the ramps on the dolly so the car could roll on. The pin was stuck, and I got a terrible gash on my thumb while trying to remove it. So I start shaking my hand trying to get my mind off the pain, and told my wife to stand by the back of the truck to guide me as I drove the car onto the dolly.

I started the car, and remembered I needed to tell my wife something. I hit my head against the driver's side window TWICE before I thought to open the window.

So there I was, in Kingman Arizona. With a bleeding thumb, a splitting headache, and a wife who's laughing so hard she almost peed her pants.

[DEMVET-USMC]

23. That part where you bump your head against a closed window and do it again

I have done . It happens when you are really upset or in pain.I have actually been puzzled and had figure out why I couldn`t stick my head out the window ...Oscar

[SaveElmer]

7. Didn't know beer can collectors opened them from the bottm

I was at a pub/restaurant here in DC - the Brickskeller - that serves beers from around the world. My beer came upside down. Not realizing they opened the bottom of the beer to preserve the pop top for beer can collectors I immediately turned the beer over and spilled it all over myself. Jeez...and I was drinking a Grain Belt Beer (You Minnesotans know !)...who would collect a Grain Belt beer can anyway ?

[DEMVET-USMC]

15. Gee, do you think a Grain Belt Beer can is going to be a collectable,ever?

I was going to say in your life time, but.... YOU PEOPLE DID ELECT:" Jessie-THE BODY-Ventura as Gov., what can I say ? ...Oscar

[SaveElmer]

28. Well I'm a transplanted Minnesotan

Living in DC suburbs...but I can say my dad most certainly did NOT vote for that muscle bound idiot!!!

[lagniappe]

8. I've done this a few times.

Gone to work on Saturday morning thinking it was a regular workday. The entire drive to the office I am thinking how lucky I am that the traffic is so light.

I also have a bad habit of solving problems in my head while I am driving. I used to work for NASA, and one time I was solving some problem, and I accidently attempted to enter Johnson Space Center. I did it purely from habit because I had worked there in the past. However, when this happened, I hadn't worked at NASA for two years.

[Race4Peace]

11. this is pure stupidity...

this happens alot:
I wake up on saturday morning, and I think its a work day, until i realize it's saturday. I relax, tell myself to get up to watch saturday morning cartoons. I automatically go to sleep.

[DEMVET-USMC]

20. What a comfort to know NASA is in the hands of people like. Just kidding

we all screw up. I have done far stupider things. Oscar

[sangh0]

9. I once restored, when I should have backed up

Really bad. Really dumb

[Mr. McD]

10. I have sat a stop sign waiting for it to turn green.

:smoke: :smoke: :smoke: :smoke:

[DEMVET-USMC]

18. I seem to recall doing that a few times myself.

...Oscar

[fudge stripe cookays]

12. My freshman year of college.....

I was still getting used to the long stretch of highway we in Texas affectionately call I-35. And I never paid attention to those numbers on the highway signs because I'd never had to. I'd lived in Austin almost my whole life, and my mom had always driven. I always knew where I was.

I'd only been on the part between Austin and Dallas once before this, so didn't know it by heart like I do now.

I was getting really thirsty, so pulled off onto the access road around Belton/Temple and started looking for a place to grab a Coke. I ended up (you Texans will appreciate this-- don't give away the joke yet) at a Carl's Jr. in KILLEEN. I rang up my mom and let her know I was on my way, I was in Killeen, I'd be home in a bit, yadda yadda yadda... and she was sorta confused. "Killeen? Is that on the way home? I don't remember."

"Of course it is," I said. I continued on my drive, but then realized that none of the highway exit signs looked familiar at all. I didn't recognize any of the names. I started feeling a little weird.

And then, panic set in. I had no idea where I was, but I knew it wasn't 35, and I could not figure out how I'd ended up there. For the first time in my life I paid attention to a highway number sign (which told me I was heading WEST!!)

Finally I started driving back from whence I'd come. And eventually connected up to 35 again. When I took that exit off the highway, the access road had immediately started turning ever so subtly to the west and I hadn't even noticed!

Probably the stupidest thing I've ever done. We still bring it up every once in awhile for a giggle. NOW, I'm one of those people you can always ask for directions, people say I draw killer maps, and I can always find my way back somewhere once I've been there.

But not THAT day! ;-)

[DEMVET-USMC]

13. If that is the worst you have done,you are doing really well my freind.

I have screwed up my computer so bad so many times, I have had no choice but to " format C:" , and rebuild the whole system. Not easy to do with replacement components and many, many hours of necessary down loads that can take as much as 4 hours to get one. And then you have to reboot and get another equally long download. Oh yeah, if you get an error message, start that down load all over again. For those of you who do not know what format C: means, you erase your hard drive completely. If you want to do this ,always do it at least 3 times, I do it 5 times to truly clean the drive. DO NOT DO THIS unless you are prepared to rebuild the entire operating system, drives, etc. for peripherials and on and on. ...Oscar

[myrna minx]

14. While trying to launch trash into my dumpster, I threw my

purse in with the trash. The dumpster had been emptied earlier that day, so my purse was wwwaayyyy down at the bottom. The dumpster was huge, therefore I couldn't climb into it even if I wanted to. A nice fella passed by and questioned me about my dilemma. He immediately jumped into the dumpster and fetched my purse. Awwwww...Minnestoans are so nice.

[DEMVET-USMC]

19. That is called dumpster diving. You never know what you may find in one.

I have found some really good stuff in them. ...Oscar

[Race4Peace]

16. I was on my computer game, and I screwed the engine.

I meant to shift from 3rd to 4th gear, but accidentally shifted into 2nd. Waddaya know, I blew the motor, and spun out at the same time.

I am a dumbass

[sybylla]

17. Tried to wash dirt off a Twinkie

Don't ask me what I was thinking. All I can say is that my desperation for a Twinkie, the last Twinkie in the box, blinded me to the effects of water on that soft yellow cake. When it crumbled in my hands under the water, it was like someone slapped me awake and I ran out of the bathroom embarassed to death and glad no one saw me do it. It's been nearly 30 years and I'm just now getting so I can talk about it. <blushes>

[Richardo]

22. I once tried to mute the dogs with the TV remote...

:eyes:

Just reflex, I tell ya. Took me just a second to "come to", and crack myself up. :D

[TrogL]

24. I tried muting the kids, the birds

Once I tried the channel changer in hopes of getting the cat to stay out of the garbage.

Didn't help much.

[DEMVET-USMC]

25. I do that all the and it does not work. What kind of remote should I buy?

[Richardo]

26. Check those batteries!

:)

[DEMVET-USMC]

27. Oh would it not wonderful if you could just turn channel or off in life.

The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.....Shakespeare ...Oscar

[No2W2004]

29. I have TiVo, so now

I constantly reach for the "rewind" button while listening to the radio, watching TVs without TiVo, looking out the window...