I played a choral concert this evening

[GoddessOfGuinness]

The chorus was made up of 400+ Southern Baptist teens. The music was pretty typical CCC :puke:

I felt like I was accompanying the Stepford children. So young, yet so devoid of passion...

[stopbush]

1. Dropkick me, Jesus, through the goal post of life.

How about, "Go, Congregation, Go!"

True story: I used to do a lot of church gigs as a freelance singer in NYC. One of my regular haunts was the Swedenborgen church just off Park Ave on E 35th or 36th (this was the church that Helen Keller attended). Anyway, it was the typical NYC church gig - a hired quartet that showed up an hour before the service, sight read and prepared an anthem and basically winged all the hymns sans rehearsal.

One Sunday, we were singing the final hymn from their very, VERY old hymnals when we came upon what has become my all-time favorite line from a hymn:

"Let fall upon us your golden showers."

We immediately lost it and jumped the shark for the final verse!!

[GoddessOfGuinness]

2. Hahaha!!!

Funny, what a few years can do to the lines of a hymn!

This group had prepared a few short a capella numbers in addition to the accompanied fare. The one that got me the most was "Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you."

How can someone sing these words, or hear them sung, while the meaning thoroughly escapes them?

[Rabrrrrrr]

4. As to that hymn they sang

I wouldn't be surprised if they sang that, in their home churches, right after the presentation and processional of the American flag tothe altar, and a blessing for the Christian work that the US is about in "liberating" Iraq and making the people free and killing terraists.

The religious righty jesus crispy fundies have a brain that exists with a total and complete disconnect between the Bible, their theology, what Jesus said, and their praxis. I don't know how anyone's brain can handle living in at least four entirely distinct worlds, but these assholes manage to do it.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

6. "jesus crispy fundies"

Heehee...Snap, crackle, and pop!
Love it!

[Rabrrrrrr]

7. Friend of mine, when we were counselors at a Christian summer camp,

(and yes, we're both dedicated and earnest Christians), he came up with the term "Jesus Crispie" to describe the "born again" "hands raised in the air" "televangelist" crowd of judgmental, works-based-for-others-but-faith-based-for-us-though-we're-really-guilty-about-having-sex-organs -but-not-guilty-about-stupid-welfare-niggers-dying-from-lack-of-health-care kind of Christians. Ever since he first said it, I've loved that term. :-)

[Rabrrrrrr]

3. OMG, I'd need to take a shower of lysol and bleach

after having to listening to such schlock.

Ewwwwwwwwwwwww.

There's so much INCREDIBLE Christian music - that is musicologically excellent, and also theologically sound and good - I don't know why someone decided to start a trend of cliche-ridden POS choral writing of music that's so emotionally manipulative with the music and melodies, but also utterly manipulative with their pisspoor words and the sacchariney, childish, illthought theology.

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwww.

I wasn't even there, but reading about this makes me want to take a shower.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

5. I had a Kelpie Ale when I got home...

It helped. :beer: