I'm looking for some good real estate / FSBO humor. Got any good jokes?

[Wonk]

Something to help lighten the mood as we prepare for the first open house next weekend would really be appreciated.

Even some real estate horror stories would be nice, if you have any, so in case things get particularly tense we can think "well, it could be worse".

[Justitia]

1. tip: take all the TP off your rolls so they won't ask to use the toilet

I'm always amazed at how many "lookers" assume the restrooms are for public use.

Uh, that probably didn't make you feel any better huh?

I empathize - our house is on the market right now and having a house for sale is a process that sucks.

Best of luck to you!

[Ready4Change]

2. Tale from my houses history.

A previous owner of my house was foreclosed on, and the house stood empty for about a year. During that time, a real estate agent working for the owning bank brought some potential buyers by to take a look. The agent opened the door, they all stepped in, and found a family living there.

Everyone asked everyone "Uh, what are you doing here?"

Turns out someone with no rights to the property got a set of keys to the house and had been renting it out for several months.

Quite the scam. The guy was, as far as I know, never caught.

[Wonk]

3. kick