Novice senator could launch invasion of wrong country to deter nonexistent threat.
Rocket Launched Carrying
Advanced Scientific Satellite to
Monitor Global WarmingIt's successfully shot down in test of missile defense system.
LATEST HEADLINES. . . . . . Ridge: Al Qaeda threatening to count every vote in Florida . . John McCain turns down Lakers . . . . . .Bush mulls all-volunteer draft . . . . .
Former Enron CEO Kenneth
Lay IndictedAdministration issues warning of massive Al Qaeda attack.
As usual, the networks experiment with new fare during the summer, when many people are away. Here are some of the shows you'll probably miss:
"Democratic National Convention" (CNN), "Republican National Convention" (Fox): These two spoofs of the political nominating process are not to be missed. Deft portrayals by some of our finest comic actors provide the loopy cast of characters. They're all here: the mock-serious news anchors who repeat the same information endlessly; the shallow, scripted politicians spouting bumper sticker slogans; the political wives, on constant auto-smile while secretly drinking themselves into a stupor. You'll laugh so hard you'll cry.
"The Olympics" (NBC): Avoid this snoozer. 964 hours of commercials, pre-packaged profiles, commercials, tape-delayed events, and more commercials. Here, I'll save you some time: the Russians win weightlifting, Americans win track and field, Brazil soccer, Cuba boxing, China table tennis, Australia swimming, and Lithuania basketball.
http://www.ironictimes.com/index.html