Man Calls Pet Owner - Offers To Return Lost Bird For Sex

[matcom]

<snip>

SHAWNEE, Kan. -- When a Kansas woman lost her pet parrot last month, she thought she'd never see it again. That was until someone called her home, offering to return the bird in exchange for sex.

Now, police are seeking charges against the alleged caller.

"Losing Reggie is the most devastating thing to happen to me in my life because we love him so much," the bird's owner said.

The woman said she lost her Eclectus parrot on June 2. She started posting signs soon after the bird flew away from her home. She also placed an ad in a newspaper classifieds section.

This week, a man called the bird owner's home three times, and then she called police.

http://www.wftv.com/news/3532031/detail.html

[Liberal Veteran]

Obviously she doesn't want the bird back THAT badly....

LOL

[GOPisEvil]

1. What a jerk!

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

2. I'm not sure what the most depressing part of the article is

This part: When a Kansas woman lost her pet parrot last month, she thought she'd never see it again. That was until someone called her home, offering to return the bird in exchange for sex.

Or this part: "Losing Reggie is the most devastating thing to happen to me in my life because we love him so much," the bird's owner said.


Both are pretty fucking pathetic if you ask me.

[Robb]

6. People can get pretty attached to birds

...I think I've posted before about the late Bob the Parrot, my ex-sis-in-law's bird. Cool bird... would imitate the noises of sex at odd moments, as well as an uncle who passed away from emphysema a few years back. ("cough...cough...c*cksucker!!")

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

7. Uhm, sure, I've gotten attached to pets too

But how any pet going missing could be the worst event to happen in a person's life... well, that's fucking pathetic. She must live in a goddamn bubble.

[Magrittes Pipe]

9. The death of my parrot in 2001 was the worst thing to happen to me.

You calling me pathetic?

Maybe I'm fortunate that none of my close human family members have died unexpectedly or for any reason other than old age. But I'm not fucking pathetic simply because I have the capacity to love.

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

10. Well

You're either living one hell of a charmed life or you've never taken a risk. I'd say most people have had a lot of worse things than that happen to them before they're even teenagers. Sorry, but that's how I see it.

[eyesroll]

13. Actually, psychologists say pets' deaths can be much more traumatic

than adult relatives' deaths, because we are responsible for their welfare, we wonder what we could have done wrong/differently, and the pet is generally loved unconditionally and unambiguously. There's no ambivalence about our pets -- they don't wrong us (at least not willfully).

When most adult relatives die, we're not responsible for their welfare, we often have mixed feelings about even our closest relatives, and, in many cases, it's not unexpected.

And, on edit -- I'd love to find out exactly how never taking a risk correlates to not having things as bad as losing a pet suddenly happen.

I've lost a pet bird, suddenly to kidney failure that was only diagnosed on necropsy, and I equate that much worse on the scale than losing a job, losing an elderly grandparent who had cancer and was in a lot of pain. True -- I've lost no close friends, no young close family members, and I've never been severely injured or ill; I suppose that makes me fortunate, sure. I've had my ups and downs, though. I've been laid off and I've been dumped hard. Does that mean I've lived an unusually charmed life?

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

15. How risks correlate...

If you never take a risk, you never lose anything. If you don't live and try to experience things, you don't risk feeling pain either. That's how it correlates.

[eyesroll]

17. I've taken risks. I've lost things.

I've also taken risks that have worked out beautifully. It happens.

Because I've never had a risk go royally wrong, I'm somehow pathetic or living in a bubble?

I'd be curious to know what has gone so wrong in your life that losing your dog wasn't in the Top 20, that had anything to do with risk? If it's really been that bad, I'm sorry you've had a rough go.

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

18. I agree - it does go both ways

And I also feel very strongly that someone can't truly appreciate the good things in life without having had experienced the bad. Someone that's been rich their entire lives can't possibly appreciate their wealth in the same way that someone who has lived in poverty can.

People take risks in life and they go both ways. Sometimes you win, and sometimes you lose. If someone takes risks and they always come out on top, well, that's a charmed life. You've beaten the law of averages. Congrats! If you've truly risked, that's not pathetic at all, just very lucky.

I've loved people only to have them either die or betray me. I've taken risks in helping people, only to have that turned against me. I couldn't have experienced such pain as that if I didn't take the risk to be passionate about life. With that pain has also come equally strong happiness, sense of achievement, and satisfaction.

On edit: I'm not going to list all the good and bad things in my life. I would prefer not to discuss my private life, and I did not ask anyone to discuss their own.

[DS1]

23. Fortunate = Pathetic AND/OR Zero Risk

That's some fucked up logic you get there.

[Name removed]

11. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Magrittes Pipe]

12. We have a winner.

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

14. We've all been attached to a pet

And it is very sad. I lost the dog I grew up with that I was VERY attached to. That event doesn't even make the top 20 most devastating things in my life.

I'm sorry, but that doesn't make me a prick in any way, shape, or form.

[geniph]

21. Yes, but why project your own experience onto others

and assume that for others, their pets dying won't be in the top 20 most devastating things in their lives - and if they are, they're "pathetic"? Why not just accept that for some of us, no person will ever give us the unconditional love we feel for our pets?

I've lost friends and family members, had a family member get Alzheimers, another lose an infant, another become a paraplegic - lots of tragedies. Yet my cat Jigger's death was the most devastating for me. If that makes me pathetic in your eyes, so be it - but why not just accept that not all of us bond to people the way we do to our pets? Why judge it? Love is love.

[MissMillie]

3. Scumbag

that's it.... just scumbag.

[gatlingforme]

4. Those scumbags lurk everywhere. I am surprised the guy didn't

screw the bird.

[yellowcanine]

5. Maybe she misunderstood him. Maybe he said SETS. He just wanted to play

tennis with her. He really likes playing tennis and needs someone else to play with. Heh.

[St. Jarvitude]

19. Maybe, or he wants to play SET

The Family Game of Visual Perception

http://www.setgame.com/set/

[DS1]

8. All I wanted was a little beak

:shrug:

[TXlib]

16. You're evil.

[JVS]

20. He just wants to wet his beak.

As don Fanucci would say

edit:typo

[yellowcanine]

22. Or maybe dip his beak

.