White House Declares War On DSL Provider

[realisticphish]

WASHINGTON, DC—The Bush Administration is awaiting congressional approval for an official act of war against high-speed DSL service provider Qwest, White House officials confirmed Tuesday. "After two weeks of trying to peaceably resolve our differences with Qwest, we have decided that this poor customer service will not stand," Bush said in a televised address. "I waited in the Oval Office all day for the technician to show up, and then, when I called them to find out where he was, I was transferred to another phone rep and got disconnected. We will begin bombarding them with tersely worded e-mails as early as next week." This marks the third time Bush has declared war this month, following conflicts with DIRECTV and the Potomac Electric Power Company.


-The Onion


:hippie: The Incorrigible Democrat

[lpbk2713]

1. On another note ..........

Washington, DC ....... Qwest Telco security officials are investigating complaints from the Washington, DC Kerry/Edwards campaign headquarters regarding a number of unsolicited pizza delivery requests that were not actually ordered by the Kerry/Edwards office. Qwest technicians have traced the originating calls to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave in DC and have actually recorded some of the calls in progress and say it is the same individual with a Texas drawl who calls each time....... More at eleven.