An e-mail from my friend in animal rescue seeking advice

[Rhiannon12866]

I just received this e-mail from my friend who has been fostering two very young mother cats with six kittens between them. Another friend of hers prevented them from being euthanized by a very irresponsible owner and my friend took them in. All have been either adopted or are going to a PetsMart adoption clinic, but this one young mother cat who she is still caring for. She is not as experienced with cats as she is with dogs, so has been asking my advice. I have had three cats in my life, but am not nearly as experienced as the folks on DU. If you have any ideas that might help her or explain the kitty's behavior, I know she'd be very grateful. My thought is that this kitty is probably just seeking her attention, but I'd welcome any ideas that you can give me. Thanks!
Rhiannon :-)

Just an update. The mom and her two kittens went to the vet for worming and shots. The mom is neg for FIV, YAY!!! All is fine. Both kittens are boys. The vet said the black one is feisty.

Question: The cat I have here is acting a bit strange to me, but you see I am a dog person and am actually a bit nervous around cats since three people I knew got bitten in the last two years and had to have either rabies shots or a had bad infection because of it. I get nervous. Well, this cat seems to sleep during the day and be fine, alert etc. At night, she is scary. She rubs up against you, wants attention, is fine but then occasionally nips you. When I pulled my arm away fast when she nipped my elbow. It must have scared her because she bent down, ears went back and she hissed at me.

She also gets weird when I try to leave. She gets under my feet cries loud and looks like she is going to attack me. Maybe she just wants out. I will adopt her to an inside outside home IF the person is a responsible person - keeps an eye out and is not near a road etc. What do you think? It is getting to the point that I am afraid to see her at night or touch her, sometimes, or let my son around her.

Would anyone want such a cat? I put out her story to more rescues and sent pictures to post on their sites. She will be hard to adopt, I think, unless someone is an experienced cat owner. She is all fixed, shots, tested, etc. I am not looking for any donation, just a good home, so spread the word as much as you can. My petsitter says she will take her if no one else will, but that would be 34 cats! I have not heard back from any other rescue. I am getting nervous about her getting adopted. I can't keep her forever.

I am also trying to get her to be more playful and touchable. Can you believe it? I am trying to make her more adoptable, ha ha. She likes string, but not balls really. Anyway, let me know about the biting thing. It is starting to freak me out! Thanks.

[Dookus]

1. sounds like pretty typical cat behavior to me

I had a cat who used to nip for no good reason. A few taps on the nose and a loud NO seems to work.

I don't think there's anything to worry about. Just a typical cat, as far as I can see.

[Rhiannon12866]

2. Thank you!

I guess she is worried because she's never had a cat and is more used to dogs. I imagine that suddenly finding herself with eight cats was pretty overwhelming, as it would be for anybody. I cat-sit a cat that has bitten when he wasn't being petted, so I thought that this might be the case.:shrug:

[shraby]

3. If the cat has been declawed it

will tend to nip like that. The only cat I've seen that would nip was declawed. Don't know about the hissing part though.

[Rhiannon12866]

6. Thanks. I am pretty sure that this young cat hasn't been declawed

My most beloved cat was the only one I have had who had been declawed and she was only aggressive towards other cats. With people, she was a true lap-cat, just seeking attention and petting. She never bit anyone and only ever hissed at my other cat, who was older, bigger and had claws. And my other cat would back down! I could do anything with this cat, so I think it's probably a matter of individual personality.:shrug:

[aquart]

4. Did any of the bites break skin?

If not, tell your friend to stop being a baby. If yes, tell her to stop being a baby.

Sounds like littermate behavior. The young mama is trying to establish a relationship.

I'm astonished at the skittishness of your friend. The cat senses it, of course.

Tell the well-meaning individual that YOU CAN'T GET RABIES FROM A CAT THAT DOESN'T HAVE RABIES.

If this cat bites her to the freaking bone she still won't get rabies and the cut will heal. Mine did. (Got it from a rescued Siamese with stud tail. He wanted to be friends, then he'd get sexually excited and maul the object of his affections. Then he would get sad and large-eyed because no one wanted to play with him. He got a good home and his new owner didn't even require surgery. And her hand healed just fine.)

There might also be some hassles because the mommy hormones are dying down. This was a nursing mother, right?

[Rhiannon12866]

8. Thank you! This is such a great point that I hadn't thought of!

You now see the reason that I posted this on DU! I never considered hormones, since I adopted all three of my cats as adults and all of them were already-spayed females.:-)

My friend was anxious because this mother cat was somewhat aggressive towards her kittens and she asked me if she should separate them. The mother growled at them. I told her to err on the side of caution, if she was worried about it, and do it. The kittens were nine-weeks-old when she took them in, so were no longer nursing, but had been. The other mother cat is still nursing, since her kittens were only two weeks old when my friend took them in. This was on July first, so I don't know how long that this hormone thing lasts.:shrug:

My friend is not a baby, she is just not very experienced with cats and is anxious that she is doing the right thing and doesn't really understand their behavior. Who does, with cats? She took in eight cats, with no questions asked, and is doing her best to find them good homes. How many people would undertake such daunting and heartbreaking work?;(

My friend has a 14-year-old cat who bites when he's not being petted, so I wondered if this poor kitty was seeking attention.:shrug:

[AmyDeLune]

5. My Neighbor's cat

does that too. I'm a "cat person" and I still find it unnerving. He'll come up to you, be all friendly, sit it your lap and then without warning, scratch, hiss, and bite. Then act as if nothing has happened. I think he's trying to play/establish dominance. Not a cat for the kiddies to play with though.

[Rhiannon12866]

9. The cat that I cat-sit bit me once when I was petting him, but

he is a difficut cat and I think that this is unique to him. My friends, who know about cats than I do, told me that this is considered a "love bite." I know that this kitty loves me, since I have known him since he was eight weeks old.:-)

This poor cat has been through so much. I just wish that my friend could keep her, but she has two dogs that are not fond of cats.:-(

I wish that you hadn't said that about the kiddies, since she is already worried about her little boy interacting with the cat. And you know how much children naturally love animals, and especially this one whose mother rescues them. I suggested that she keep one of the kitties for him, since cats are better with small children than dogs; they can more easily get out of the way!:o

Thanks for the advice. I can use all than I can get on this.:-)

[Momof1]

7. normal cat behavior... she wants attention n/t

[Rhiannon12866]

11. That's what I thought, thanks!

Apparently, this kitty is happiest as an only cat, as some are. My Rhiannon sure was. I appreciate the reassurance that I was on the right track. I wanted to give my friend the best advice and I am a neophyte compared to the cat lovers on DU.:-)

[wickerwoman]

10. It's totally normal.

My cats were weaned a little too soon so whenever I present them with fingers or toes they try to hook them with their claws and pull them into their mouths to suck. In a pinch, they'll try an elbow, knee, anything vaguely pointed. This could easily be mistaken for aggression (scratching and clawing) if you haven't been around cats much. They also knead me (looks like they are stretching and sharpening their claws on me). This is what they do to get milk from their mothers but can look like scratching.
You become a kind of uber-mother-kitty when you take in a cat. They aren't as solitary as their rep. They want to hang out with you and see where you're going. My one cat likes to run between my legs yowling at the top of his lungs whenever I walk somewhere. I figure he's part of my posse.
She's on the right track trying to socialize the cat better. If she spends lots of time picking her up and petting her, the cat will be less skittish around humans.
I'd have to really see the cat in action to know, but I would guess that the cat was weaned early and had bad experiences with humans but I haven't heard anything that sounds like she is irredemable.

[Rhiannon12866]

12. Thank you. This will be very reassuring to my friend

You're right in that she hasn't been around cats much, compared to dogs. But she is willing to take in any animal that needs her. This cat is still quite young. My friend called the two mother cats, "babies, themselves," so this one is still probably trying to find her way and bond with somebody. I am sure that she will be fine if she just finds someone willing to take the time with her, but this is not easy. The problem is that there are just so many. Thanks so much for your reassuring words. It sounds as if you also adopt those who really need you.:-)

[jukes]

13. Rhi

if she's been outside, she's still on a nocturnal cycle; hence, wants play @ night.

your friend risks injury by pulling away from a nip; that's just a cat-kiss, but if she gets scared by sudden movement she may clamp down. pulling away can rip open a wound, unintended by cat.

have your friend turn out the lights a little early & groom kitty in the dark. catnip treats @ bedtime can help, too, but if she's unaccustomed to it, she'll drool the 1st time.


mommy cat is lonely for her kittens. cat motherhood doesn't stop @ weening, there's an extended "play/training" period. if this was 1st litter, she's disconsolate.



patience, patience, patience; & get a book on cat behavior. they are NOTHING like dogs.



good luck!

[MaryH]

14. I have 4 cats

Some cats just have a high sensitivity to touch. You can be petting them and then all of a sudden they will turn and bit and hiss. Their nervous system just gets overloaded and the touch is just more than they can stand - so they turn and bite. And then they can go right back to being petted.

Cats are just cats and they all are different. And the hormone thing could absolutely be causing difficulties - that and the fact that the mother is just a kitten herself.

Sounds normal to me - she just needs a little time and gentleness.

[Rhiannon12866]

18. Thank you, MaryH!

The kitty who I cat-sit has done this to me. I know that he loves me, since I have known him since he was eight-weeks-old and found in a rainstorm by the side of the road. I have been petting him when he has just clamped down on my arm. I am told that this is caused by sensory overload, but it is disconcerting, nonetheless. Fortunately, none of my cats ever did this. I agree that this poor little girl just needs time and affection. She has already been through too much.:-(

[Rhiannon12866]

16. Thank you, my friend!

I am not aware that these kitties came from outside, just a very bad and irresponsible home that allowed these valuable little lives to be created and then wanted to extinguish them because they were too much trouble. But, this is possible, so will pass this on, Thanks.;(

It sounds to me as if this is a first litter, since both mother cats are quite young, themselves, but one of my friend's main concerns was this cat's antipathy towards her kittens. She growled at them and she asked me if she should separate them. Since the kittens were nine-weeks-old when she got them, and were no longer nursing, I told her to err on the side of caution and do so. I have never had kittens, so relied on advice from someone who had.:shrug:

Thanks so much for this. I will pass it all on. I am well aware that they are nothing like dogs, but my cats have been pretty easy to deal with, except for my little feral girl. The cat who I cat-sit has clamped down on me with his jaws while I was petting him, though I know that he is not unaffectionate and I am one of the few that he loves. But it's just instinct to try to get away from biting kitty, even though I have known him since he was eight-weeks-old!:D

A book is a great idea, plus research on-line. I consulted Alley Cat Allies when I brought in my kitty that had reverted to feral behavior. Thanks. I appreciate all of this so much!:hi:

[jukes]

23. Rhi

very possible w/1st litter. i trapped a preggie female 1ce; she abandoned her litter in my garage. i heard mewling, investigated, and found 3 new-borns. shock of capture might have triggered delivery.


i boxed the 2 that were clearly alive in toweling, then drove full-speed to the vets, carefully doing CPR (they're SO fragile) on the coldest w/ 1 hand, steering w/ the other, and letting go of the wheel to shift gears.

the cold one was DOA. #2 was lost 2 days later due to infected navel (weekend, & the emerg clinic was then run by an incompetent; i now stock oral & inj antibi's) i hand raised #3. mr. edward.

had to teach him to suckle w/ a needleless syringe, feeding every 2 hours for 2 weex. stimulated his anus/genitalia w/ a warm moist cloth to teach him to void, bedded him w/ "funbags"; ie, latex gloves filled w/ warm water.

he now is a 4 y.o. healthy long hair yellow tabby, 16 # w/o a trace of body fat. he'd be my new alpha, but he's too cerebral to lust for power.

was a most rewarding experience, 1 of my best jobs ever.

[Rhiannon12866]

27. Wow.

That is an amazing story. I could not do what you do. I know that the rewards can be great, but the heartbreak is constant. I have two friends in animal rescue, the one who is fostering these kitties, and another who I met when she placed my beloved cocker spaniel, Barney, with me. I love animals, but would have to keep them all. I know that my friends agonize over the homes that they choose for these little guys and they can never be 100% sure. And, as I'm sure you know, there are just too few responsible homes for all the animals that are out there. They have both told me that, emotionally, the animals are with them always.

I became friends with the girl with the kitties because she got me together with my tiny Brussels Griffon, Meneken. I had recently lost my Barney. He was 18, but he was the dog of a lifetime. My other dog, Sheena, also a cocker, was acting very hyper and distressed and I thought she must miss Barney. I know now that she had Cushing's Syndrome. On a whim, I called about another blond male cocker that had been up for adoption a few months before. My friend who had placed Barney with me had sent me a clipping from her local paper about him, since this dog looked so much like Barney. I was told that that dog had been placed long ago, but the girl I called said she knew of another little dog that was really in trouble. The guy who had him didn't want him and was planning to have him euthanized. This girl offered to put his picture in the paper, as she had with the cocker, but he couldn't be bothered. She was really desperate because he had said he would only keep the dog until Tuesday, and it was now Wednesday. I called him immediately and because he now knew that someone was interested, he kept the dog. I had to research this, of course, but finally agreed to meet him on Saturday and I took the dog. He immediately bonded with my remaining cocker and they were amazing together. My friend says that his happy ending allows her to go on, because there are just too many that are sad.

All my guys have sad stories. If you read all my posts on DU, eventually you will know them all, LOL! The one that is causing me the most pain right now is my kitty that I lost in February. She was special because she was the only one that I rescued myself and we went through a lot together.

Thank you for sharing that wonderful story. I will pass it on to my friend.

[Mara Steele]

21. Obviously the words of a man...

who knows what he's talking about. :hi:

Thank you so much for being a friend of animals, jukes! :loveya: :yourock:

[jukes]

25. Thanks, Mara Steele

your regard means much!

:pals:

[Mara Steele]

26. It's mutual, man!

:pals:

[SoCalDem]

15. Like the others have said, she is just being a kitty

We have LOTS ..and they scrap with each other all the time..

One of ours, Mommie, will nibble on your outer wrist bone (the one that sticks out a bit) every time we pet her..Amber "bites" my nose every chance she gets..

They have quirky little personalities...and the fact that this one has kittens, probably has made her instincts sharper..

A mother cat must have total obedience from her kittens or they are dead..

After the kittens are gone, and she is fixed, she will probably be a whole other cat..:)

Petsmart is pretty good about getting their "turn-ins" adopted..

:)

[Rhiannon12866]

19. The two kitties that I adopted together

who had belonged to my late uncle would have hissing confrontations, which scared me. I learned that my little one was a bully and was much better off as an only cat, though she was very affectionate with my two cocker spaniels. I am, like my friend, more used to dogs, though I also love cats.:-)

I appreciate your insights. I knew that you would know much more about this than I do. I tend to adopt older animals, so I appreciate your advice on kittens. IMO, kittens are the cutest baby animals. The last kitty that I adopted was a 12-year-old spayed female who had been abandoned and had reverted to feral behavior, a much harder sell than a cute, friendly kitten.:shrug:

The kittens are gone and I know that this kitty is or will soon be fixed. She had been growling at them and my friend was concerned, wondering if she should separate them. I didn't think that this could hurt, since they were nine-weeks-old and no longer nursing. These are the four who will be at the PetsMart adoption clinic. My vet is at Banfield, at another PetsMart, so I am aware that these adoption clinics are very well attended. I have almost walked out of there with a cat, myself, more than once!:D

Thanks so much for your insights. I knew that DU was the best place to come to with this.:-)

[flamingyouth]

17. I concur here - this is very normal

This is how they play with each other and the cat is trying to include your friend in their fun. One of my cats, Papa, still likes to run out from under furniture and grab at my ankles and lightly nip; it's his way of playing and saying "hi." It's nice of your friend to taka these kitties in!:hi:

[Rhiannon12866]

22. My friend says that this cat prefers being an only cat

but she may very well be lonely, now that she is suddenly alone, and looking for a playmate. And she may prefer a human one. This is an excellent point, since I know another cat that is like this.:think:

I agree that it was very kind of my friend to suddenly take on eight cats, six of them kittens, one of which can be a handful, but she is very dedicated and agonizes over finding good homes for all the animals that she places. She has shed more than a few tears over these kitties. She is responsible for my having my two dogs, Meneken and Sara, who both came from precarious situations. They are wonderful pets and I will always be grateful to her for bringing us together.:pals:

Thanks so much for your input. I knew that I was bringing my friend's kitty concerns to the right place. I hope that by understanding this kitty's issues, she can find her a good home.:hi:

[belladonna]

20. Animals are very intuitive as well

It's clear that she feels uncomfortable and perhaps a bit fearful of this cat, so it COULD be that the cat senses it and it in turn upsets the cat. Animals are very attuned to our feelings and react accordingly, IMO. With any luck, she'll start to relax a little more and the cat will sense it and begin to calm down.

[Rhiannon12866]

24. This may very well be true

I sent her this thread, so, hopefully, she will learn more from the advice given and this will give her the confidence to deal with this kitty more effectively. Thanks for your great observation.:-)