Anyone know where I can get a block of cheese the size of a car battery?

[underpants]

Yes my lovely wife is going on a business trip tomorrow so I will be living George Constanza's dream-sitting around in my underwear eating a block of cheese the size of a car battery (if I can find one).

Turn the volume WAY up on the TV and immerse myself in political punditry on the airwaves. Oh and I can yell at the TV just like back in my bachelor days (and the Ohio State-Team up north game, she leaves for that day as well).

The cats of course will be upset that she is not here and will give me weird confused looks but they do that anyway even without the cheese.

CHEESE= FREEDOM!!!!!!!

[GOPisEvil]

1. I can get you a block of cheese BIGGER than a car battery.

No problemo!

[underpants]

6. I just hope it can survive in the chocolate milk bath I am planning

enjoy your breakfast :evilgrin:

[GOPisEvil]

9. I'm glad I have a poor short-term memory.

:P

[underpants]

12. THAT reminds ME that I need to get another rubber duckie

and some snorkel fins (don't ask)

[charlyvi]

2. Do you live in

Wisconsin?

[underpants]

8. Close

Virginia :bounce:

[charlyvi]

18. Well, get those underpants

in the car, drive up to Wisconsin aka the Cheese Capitol of the World and buy yourself the biggest piece of cheese that ever came forth from a dairy. Bring a U-Haul for that piece of cheese!!

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

3. Awesome plan

Wish I could join ya!

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

4. Check your local deli

We have stores run by Mennonites in our neck of the woods, and they get their cheese from the Amish in Ohio. They can cut them any way you like. Only thing is their cheeses aren't huge squares, but long huge tubes, about 7-10" in diameter and a foot and a half long. Not the shape of a car battery, but the same amount of the good food. (Munching on cheese now as I type this).

[underpants]

5. I actually am going up into Va. Mennonite country on Wednesday

Shenandoah valley-The Cheese Shop (ironically) is just down the road from my folks place. You are right AWESOME food stuffs.

[Kathy in Cambridge]

7. Costco

they have some of the biggest blocks of chees I've ever seen!

[underpants]

10. It's like a reflex to say that isn't it

Let's see where ....COSTCO!! Okay thanks :scared:

[Kathy in Cambridge]

22. I was just there yesterday-blocks o'cheese everywhere!

;-)

[matcom]

11. YOU NEED CHEESUS!

:bounce:

[underpants]

13. Yeah...biting the head off Jesus isn't going to help me any

plus I don't need any witnesses or the guilt.

[matcom]

14. Cheesus should be eaten with toothpicks

just don't stick them in his hands :spank:

[underpants]

16. Reminds me I am going to need a LOT of surgical tubing

Thanks.

[matcom]

17. Home Depot is having a sale

Funnels too :think:

[underpants]

19. Good I need a pneumatic hammer too if my plans are to be completed

f**kin'g cat ain't shitting on the floor on MY watch :grr:

[matcom]

21. well i sent you a TabbyTote for your birthday!

that should help

on edit: i SWEAR that guy looks like John Kerry :D

[underpants]

15. Maybe I can coordinate this with ayeshahaqqiqa's suggestion

I get a block of cheese the size of a car battery and ask the Mennonites if they can carve into the shape of Jesus. Yeah that might just work. :think:

[TreasonousBastard]

20. How about a cheese the size of a car

http://www.picturehistory.com/find/p/23/mcms.html



"This engraving depicts people eating from a huge wheel of cheese in the White House. President Andrew Jackson invited members of the public into the White House for many parties. At his last one, 1,400 lbs. of cheese was eaten in less than two hours. The White House smelled of cheese for weeks."

http://www.bookpage.com/9909bp/childrens/big_cheese.html

"In this humorous story, the people of Cheshire learn that President Thomas Jefferson was eating cheese made in the town of Norton, Connecticut. Led by the wise and optimistic Elder John Leland, the Cheshire villagers rise to the challenge to outdo their rivals and create a bigger, better cheddar for President Jefferson to eat. With nearly everyone lending a hand, they use the milk of 934 cows, creating a cheddar weighing 1,235 pounds and standing four feet high -- big enough that the president will never again need to serve Norton's cheese. Sure enough, by the time the cheese gets from Cheshire to Hudson, New York, to Washington, D.C., people are eagerly awaiting its arrival."

And you can eat the cheese with this:

http://www.campbellsport.org/official_press_release_for_the_world's%20longest%20brat.htm

[underpants]

23. Didn't they impeach Jackson for that?

:grr:Friggin' Cheese haters:grr:

[TreasonousBastard]

24. Nah, that was Johnson, who...

cheesed off the South.

Jefferson's cheese was used as a down payment for the Louisiana Purchase, along with a South American spider monkey, indirectly leading to Napolean's downfall as the unknown story of the battle of Waterloo and the first of the cheese-eating surrender monkeys.

[ScreamingMeemie]

25. Mars Cheese Castle...They have all the cheese you need and they

deliver!!!

Enjoy. It is the best cheese in the world...and also a great place to stock up on Packer gear. :hi:

http://www.marscheese.com/

[Earth_First]

26. The funniest part about this thread...

is that I know where the Mars Cheese Castle is in Wisco. We would pass it almost every summer along the highway on our way up to the Phish shows at Alpine Valley, just passed by it about a month ago, actually.

[ScreamingMeemie]

27. And I used to beg my daddy everytime we were on a trip to stop there...

and he never did. So now, I must stop there everytime I go back home with my kids. Only they are not as excited about it. ;)

On edit: I actually have a page in my scrapbook dedicated to the Mars Cheese castle, my life is that sad.

[HuckleB]

28. Tillamook Cheese Factory, Tillamook, Oregon.

[MissMillie]

29. Smith's Country Cheese

in Winchendon, MA

[Unperson 309]

30. Restaurant Supply Store!

Seriously! They have stuff in mega-bulk! I saw a roll of cheese a couple days ago that was two feet across across by three feet LONG! And the bags of grated cheese.... I nearly fainted from the sheer mental ecstasy of that much cheese!

309

[JVS]

31. www.restaurantdepot.com

I have friends who got a 12 pound block of velveeta there for use on nachos. They also have real cheeses.

[Race4Peace]

32. somewhere in Wisconsin, zero doubt about that

[VoteDemocratic2004]

33. The deli at the grocery store

You could buy the cheapest cheese that they have and buy a large block.

[Ratty]

34. I once had a dream about a big block of cheese

There was a song we sang in church when I was young. It went "You are a seed, let your roots run deep." In my dream somebody was holding a big cheese wrapped in swaddling blankets and the church people were singing to it, except the words were, yes, you guessed it "You are a cheese."

[underpants]

35. God bless you .............and cheese

:bounce:

[matcom]

36. Would You Settle For CHEESE DOODLE PEOPLE??

[underpants]

37. "One in a million shot....one in a million shot"

Another Seinfeld reference.

[name not needed]

39. Where in God's name do you find this shit?

:wtf:

[underpants]

40. Dedication, focus, persistance, and drive

:bounce:

[matcom]

41. its a gift

:D

[YellowRubberDuckie]

43. Someone has wayyyyy too much time on their hands...

[Deja Q]

38. Holy Constipation, Batman!!!

:wow:

[YellowRubberDuckie]

42. Check here:

http://www.forgottencoastfoods.com/whatsspecial.asp
This site is run by a really good friend of mine from Florida. His cheeses are getting put into stores around the midwest and south east. You might be able to custom order. I'm not sure of how expensive his stuff is, but I promise it's very high quality stuff.
Duckie