What's worse?

[GoddessOfGuinness]

Marriage to the wrong person

or

Divorce and loneliness for the rest of your life

????????????

[Dookus]

1. well

you didn't frame that in a very positive way.

Being single doesn't have to equate to loneliness.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

3. And being married doesn't have to be miserable, but

given the choice of the two extremes, which is worse?

[Dookus]

5. I think being married

would be worse.

Having another person around who constantly got on my nerves? No thanks. I'll take books and cats.

[Catch22Dem]

2. Marriage, but with a caveat

I'll tell you what my dad told me:
It's really easy to find reasons to get divorced. It's a lot harder to find reasons to stay married, but the reasons you find are usually much more important.

My wife and I were having a rough time, but we stuck it out. That's been about 6 years now and we're better today than ever before. Ol' dad was right.

[bigwillq]

4. In some cases, marriage to the wrong person

could result in abusive behavior and in the worse cases, death.

[CBHagman]

6. Feeling lonely with another person is pretty bad.

Solitude is one thing. It can be empty or it can be restful and/or enriching. But it's horrible to feel lonely when you're with another person.

[flamingyouth]

7. Married to the wrong person

Trust me. I could write a book.

[Deja Q]

8. Please define 'wrong person'

Single for all my life, I don't know what I'm missing.

[Blue-Jay]

9. Trust me on this one, OK?

I was involved in a bad relationship for a long time. It finally ended about two months before the wedding date. You might wonder why a wedding was scheduled if the relationship was so unfulfilling, and that would be a valid question. I don't really know the answer. I think I asked her to marry me one night to get her to stop ragging on me about something.

After that, I was lonely for a while too. Lonely is better, and it never lasts forever. You heal, and you find out all kinds of interesting things about yourself.

Peace.

[havocmom]

10. Goddess, divorce seems like a sentence to loneliness for the rest of life

but it isn't. Been there, found out I wasn't so good a predicting the future. At a time when I wanted to give up breathing because all I could see was a future of pain and loneliness, a kind man asked me:
"*******, don't you want to see how it all turns out?" At the time, it sounded like the stupidest question I had ever heard, and I railed at him for it.

But I stuck around. And I have to thank him for putting the question in the back of my head. He had gone further down the road I was just starting to travel. He held a light up so I could see beyond my own darkness. That's what friends do.

Married to the wrong person is a sentence one should not have to serve. Loneliness can happen in a room full of people who have known you all your life.

Around some corner, not too far in the distance, there may be a surprise and all the pain of the trip is just to get you ready for what will come.

First order of business, instead of a sentence of loneliness, we should all sentence ourselves to the task of befriending ourselves. Alone or in a room full of people, lonely can be beaten.