Which Rebublicans are what LOTR Characters?

[The Doctor.]

Ok,

So far we have Cheney as a ringwraith who confers with the 'Dark lord' in Cheney's hidden bunker. An astute DUer purports that "...such conferences are actually black rites to keep Cheney corporeal."

So now we need more of the characters filled out.
Who would be Sauruman of Many colors?
Grimer Wormtoungue?
The Goblin King?
The Orc Captain?
And most interestingly... Golem?


(ty fer the Idea Birthmark)

[Doug Decker]

1. Wormtongue would be Rove...

standing behind the king, er, pResident, whispering in his ear.

[The Doctor.]

2. My thought too

Can Haliburton be Smaug?...

[Reciprocity]

3. Not very good but...

Cheney/Gollum
Bush/Smeagol

Cheney/Gollum: They're thieves! They're thieves! They're filthy little thieves! Where is it? Where is it? They stole it from us, our presidency/precious. Curse them! WE hates them! it's ours it is, and we wants it! We wants it, we needs it. Must have the presidency/precious. They stole it from us. Sneaky little democrats/hobbitses. Wicked, tricksy, false!

Bush/Smeagol: No! Not Kerry/master.

Cheney/Gollum: Yes presidency/precious. First they cheat you, hurt you, LIE.

Bush/Smeagol: Kerry/master’s my friend!.

Cheney/Gollum: You don't have any friends, nobody likes you!

Bush/Smeagoll: I'm not listening, I'm not listening.

Cheney/Gollum: You're a liar and a thief.

Bush/Smeagol: No!

Cheney/Gollum: Murderer.

Bush/Smeagol: Go away!

Cheney/Gollum: Go away?



Bush/Smeagol: I hate you, I hate you.

Cheney/Gollum: Where would you be without me? Cheney/Gollum! Cheney/Gollum saved us! It was me! We survived because of me!


Bush/Smeagol: Not anymore.

Cheney/Gollum: What did you say?

Bush/Smeagol: Kerry/master looks after us now, we don't need you anymore. Leave now and never come back!

Cheney/Gollum: What?

Bush/Smeagol: LEAVE NOW AND NEVER COME BACK!



Bush/Smeagol: LEAVE NOW AND NEVER COME BACK!... ... ... "We--We told him to go away...and away he goes Precious! Gone, gone, gone! Bush/Smeagol free!!!

[The Doctor.]

6. Very Well Aligned - Love it!

Unfortunately Smeagol once had a conscience, * probaly never had a 'conscience' thought.

[EstimatedProphet]

4. Clearly Bush is Sauron

I have photographic evidence in my sigline.
Rove=Grima Wormtongue
Saruman=Cheney
Witchking=Rumsfeld
Goblin King=Powell
Orc Captain=Rice

And Gollum is Grover Norquist.

[The Doctor.]

7. Y'know... I suppose you could be right.

If I were the dark master I would indeed hide my own identity from the world behind the facade of an inarticulate dumbass. I would also trick myself into believing it to give substance to my visage.
Hmmm.... master of lies seems to fit.

[sasquatch]

5. I see Cheney as the corrupt wizard

Can't think of his name right off the top of my head.

[philosophie_en_rose]

8. Sauron = ???

Bush is Grima Wormtongue - using war & deceit to gain power.

Rove is Saruman - using nefarious magic to control the Theoden.

Ann Coulter, Bill O'Reilly, Sean Hannity, & Michelle Malkin are ringwraiths. Limbaugh is a troll - too fat to be a ringwraith.

The Witchking is John Ashcroft, because women will give him the pink slip!

Freepers are Sackville-Bagginses. :)

[The Doctor.]

9. Love it!

Agree with Rove and the ringwraiths.

I think Freepers should be the (I forget the names) armies of angry humans Saruman sent burning and pillaging across the country.

[DivinBreuvage]

10. Bush = Ar-Pharazon the Golden!

Ar-Pharazon appears in "Akallabeth" (The Fall of Numenor) in The Silmarillion. He is a wicked, arrogant king who persecutes the Elf-Friends and is deceived by Sauron into making war on the Valar (the Gods of Middle Earth). The gods cause the mountains to fall on him and Numenor is destroyed in the sea.

[The Doctor.]

12. Wow - better hit the Silmarillion

[PittPoliSci]

11. Cheney = Sauron

Saruman = Bush, he's a puppet, controlled by the dark one, Sauron a.k.a. Cheney.

The Witchking, who leads the armies into battle, would be Rummy.

I like the idea I saw that Hannity, Coulter, Limbaugh, Boortz, et. al. as the Ringwraiths. Just flunkies to the power of the dark evil

Rove is a good Wormtounge.

[aint_no_life_nowhere]

13. Tom Ridge Is The Cave Troll

[The Doctor.]

14. nailed it