I found out this morning that my friend had died

[RetroLounge]

What a fucking bummer. I've known him for about 8 years, and saw him about once a week since then. Hard guy to get to know, as he suffered from all kinds of shit. Mental illness, alcoholism, drug addiction. I sorta helped him kick the booze and drugs and he managed to stay off them for over 5 years, but had been struggling over the past couple of years, but doing pretty good these days. He had his own apartment and had found a job and was working hard at being self-supporting.

And when he was lucid and clean, he was just a sweetheart of a guy and would do anything for you he could. He helped me move a couple of times, came to my wedding, was really happy to see me and my wife have our kids and was genuinely interested in our lives. He had a great smile. He was a talented artist and had shown his work in a galleries here. He loved to laugh. And now he's gone.

Last Sunday he died of a massive heart attack while walking to the bus stop. 38 years old. Fuck, Fuck, Fuck...

The funeral is tomorrow morning. I gotta get some sleep.

Sometimes the sadness is just too much...

[MissouriTeacher]

1. Very sorry.

:(

[MissMillie]

2. wow.... how sad

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I'm sure that he knows you were there for him and that he'll miss you too.

[GOPisEvil]

3. That really sucks. I'm very sorry for your loss.

:-(

[Breezy du Nord]

4. Oh no!

:cry: That's TERRIBLE!!!

Man, I've GOT to stop opening these threads.

[BurtWorm]

5. I struggled much more with a friend's death than I did with my father's

Probably because my friend was way too young when he died. It was the most difficult loss I've ever faced. Maybe the worst emotional pain I've ever felt.

I wish you luck. Stay connected with people.

[Brucey]

6. Sorry.

Some years ago I lost my best friend to suicide. His parents are still hurt, but survive with good memories of him. I think about him in good ways only and am better now. Sorry for your loss, and please hang in there.

[Kat45]

7. That's so sad.

You have my sympathy.

[aquart]

8. 38 is just wrong. Way, way, way too young.

My 52 year old cousin died in June of a heart attack in his sleep.

I thought he was too young.

The human body isn't made to take that kind of abuse. But damn, it's hard to lose them just when they're finally getting it right.

[caledesi]

9. Sorry RT, I can identify

I have known a "lost soul" for about 10 years and have seen him go down hill. It's very sad. My husband and I try to help him, but what can I say? It's a very lost cause.

Expect to hear something similar to what happened to you.

I am sorry for your pain.

[listenup]

10. Condolences

remember his struggles, and not necessarily the addictions and behaviors that came from that. I am sure you will, but wanted to say it for those out there that are seeing their friends or relatives struggle. Don't give up. Keep giving the positive responses and possibilities, and sooner or later, many will see.

Your friend had sobriety and, I am sure, friends at the end.

edited: for spelling and emotion

[JackSwift]

11. Put on Birdsong

and remember that he passed through your life.

[kimchi]

12. Wow, that sucks. I'm very sorry you lost your friend.

Thanks for sharing a little of his life with us.

[Lindsey]

14. I'm really sorry

A friend from works husband died of a massive heart attack last Sunday at 52 years old. I'm going to the funeral tomorrow. This is a hard planet. I've been hearing of a lot of people passing away due to heart attacks. I wish it wasn't such a stressful place. My sympathies are with you.

[AnnabelLee]

13. I'm very sorry for your loss

My deepest sympathies on the death of your friend.:-(

[RetroLounge]

15. Thank you for the replies. I appreciate it.

eom

[buddhamama]

16. my condolences

i am sorry for the loss of your friend,RL.

may he be in peace. :hug:

[DemBones DemBones]

17. I'm sorry for the loss of your friend. What a shock for you and

others who knew and cared about him. Sudden deaths are the hardest to deal with, especially since you thought he was doing pretty well.

[Darth_Kitten]

18. That's very unfortunate....

I am sorry for all the pain you are going through.

[RetroLounge]

19. I just came back from the wake/service

and it was really crowded. There were so many people there who knew him from his Recovery programs that his parents had no idea he had that many friends, and they were very glad to see everyone.

I talked to his family and the Doctors said he had a virus that lodged in his heart, and caused the heart attack, and there was nothing they could have done. He went fast.

As his sister told me, he is finally at peace.

Thanks again for your messages.

[prolesunited]

20. Isn't amazing to know how many lives

someone has touched. I hope that gives you comfort. As his sister said, he is at peace — however your beliefs lead you to define that. May the memories of the happy times you shared sustain you through your grief. Hang in there and you know we're all here anytime you need a shoulder.

[RetroLounge]

21. Thanks...

I appreciate it...

[UrbScotty]

22. Too bad.

I hope my sig handle offers a few words of comfort.

[catpower2000]

23. I'm so sorry...

Big hugs for you. Please accept my deepest sympathy.

On a related note, please, any DUers who use cocaine--remember this story and get some help. 38 years old is too young to have your heart give up.

If I hadn't cleaned up from cocaine abuse 12 years ago--well, I probably wouldn't be around at 30. It's a killer and the effect on the body is cumulative--sometimes the effects are felt years after the addiction is over.

Take care, Retrolounge, you are in my thoughts.

Cat

[RetroLounge]

24. Thanks Cat. I needed the hugs...

and I am living proof of the truth in your advice...