New agers.....a rant

[ikojo]

OK now some background...

I have never fully understood new agers...the ones I have gotten close to have turned out to be fakes and phonies. They are not really interested in social change or challenging the powers that be. They tend to believe that all you have to do is "will" something by thinking positive thoughts. If we all just think positive thoughts then that energy will flow forth and things will change.

It's a pollyannish attitude and is defeatist in my not so humble opinion.

The reason for my rancor with new agers at this particular moment has to do with a woman who lived across the hall from me. When she moved here it was a rainy Saturday night and I helped her and her now ex husband schlep boxes up two flights of stairs. They had driven six hours or so and both looked exhausted and I had nothing going on so I just picked up boxes and began schleping.

I thought we had become friends. I lent her some money when she wanted to initiate divorce proceedings against her husband. That was two years ago. She has been somewhat regular about making payments but has not paid anything since June of this year.

She has also not spoken with me since I went off about the Bush handout to people with kids. I loath special treatment for parents and I let her know that on several ocassions. She did not like that because she said, "but I'm a siiiinngle parent with a chiiiillld." Her choice to have a kid. Her choice to divorce.

Well, since I had not heard a word from her all summer I sent an e mail asking about my money. What I got back was a litanty of excuses as to why she had not paid me all summer. I could care less...this was an obligation just like a Visa bill.

Today in my e mail I get what is basically a Dear John letter insinuating that she considers out friendship to be at an end. She said she had been thinking about what to say to me for the last few months.

See what she wants to do is say how I am the problem and she is all perfect and in love with the universe. BULL doo doo! I was of use while she didn't know anyone around here but now that she has made more establishment type friends I can be thrown away.

She just confirms everything I have ever felt about new agers. They live in this world where they fail to acknowledge that there exists people who are not always nice and smiling. It IS OK to have a negative emotion.

I know I am rambling but I feel used in so many ways. I don't trust people that easily and I feel like she took advantage of me.

:mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:

[HawkerHurricane]

1. Piece of advice:

Never loan out more money than you can afford to lose.

And a old saying:
If you loan a friend $20 and never hear from him again, it was probably worth it.

[searchingforlight]

2. This is not about New Agers.

This is about one woman. She has treated you shabbily in response to your largesse but the fact remains that if you are going to lend money you had better get an agreement on paper.

Sorry.

[brokensymmetry]

3. Hmm?

From a cynical perspective, I could point out that money trumps philosophy every time.

From a less cynical perspective, I could point out that judging an entire group because of the deplorable behavior of one member isn't the best way to go.

And from an entirely practical perspective, I could suggest that you sue her in small claims court, garnish her bank account the day after she gets paid so her other checks would bounce, and take the money and strut forth proudly.

Then you'll have nice, positive emotions and she can demonstrate how she deals with negative emotions.

:evilgrin:

[roughsatori]

4. A Christian stiffed me for 2000 dollars and said that Christ forgave him

I imagine if I wrote a post similar to yours you might see it is not rational to hate a group because of the behavior of others. Sue her if it is that important to you. The 2000 was not worth the aggravation for me so I let it go.

[ikojo]

6. I know it's not rational but I am not feeling rational right

now. The nature of a rant. Rants are not always rational and I do apologize if I have insulted anyone on DU.

I do intend to sue her if I don't have a check in my mailbox by the end of next week. She gets paid on the 15th of each month. She said she would have a check to me on the 15th. if she does not she will be served a summons. I will sue for everything I can get and am willing to go on television if needed.

[roughsatori]

7. I doubt if you insulted anyone but deadbeats

Did you get her to sign any kind of payment plan and put the deal in writing. I did that last year and lent someone 10,000 dollars and they paid back every penny (they also had a house they fully owned if I had needed to sue). I know it sounds mercenary but that is what you must do. I lent the money without interest.

[ikojo]

8. Yes, there is a document and I have kept records on an excel

file at work detailing when she has made payments. Any judge would see that she is less than consistent in repayment. I am sure I would win.

[amazona]

5. yep, she ripped you off

If you have anything in writing, like past partial payments in the form of checks, so you can document the debt, please take the advice of the other poster and take her to small claims court.

It is amazing how so-called "friends" will forget all about you when it comes time to pay back money they owe. They try to make it about how you are so negative and have a ****ty personality? No. It is about the debtor being a thief and a liar who "borrows" money with no intention of repaying it.

I have learned that the minute a "friend" asks for money, the friendship is dead. They take the money and are not seen again. No exceptions. Even if you have known the person for 20 years. It just doesn't matter. If they still cared about you as a friend, they wouldn't be hitting you up for money. Harsh but true.

[ScreamingMeemie]

9. One of the "born agains" I used to work for has owed me $1000

since June. I don't think I am going to get it. Yet she has passed judgement time and again on me and my atheist best friend. I am sure she had a talk with her pastor (who controls every aspect of her Nazarene life) and came to terms that I am a bad person who probably over charged her time and again; she's perfectly justified in her twisted mind not to pay me. Get the idea it still irks me?

Fool me once, as they say.