Religion for Cats?

[HawkerHurricane]

"I don't have my computer speakers plugged in for religious reasons (my male cat follows The Great Cat Commandment, "Thou shalt not allow anything to remain upon another thing."). "

[Shoeempress]

1. Don't forget the second cat commandment, Thou shall bite anything

even remotely stringlike

[miss_kitty]

2. What About The Commandment

"Should your human be solving aN NYT Crossword Puzzle, thou must immediately, yet casually, lay upon the clues"

[Lizzie Borden]

3. There are dog commandments too...

The 11th is "Thy dog shalt have his very own toys".

[Corgigal]

4. Also

Thou shall lay in any sink especially when another needs to use it.

[KT2000]

5. Got Two!

Thou shalt write all checks between tail sweeps.

Thou shalt view computer monitors through me.

[Misunderestimator]

6. Thou shalt endure my throwing up only on your carpet and never on your

tile. Even though 80% of your house is tile.

[miss_kitty]

9. If There is No Carpet Upon Which to Retch

then Thou Should Break All Land Speed Records To Puke Upon Bedding

[liontamer]

17. my cat follows this one

we only have 2 square feet of carpet in the whole place and she seeks them out. If I pick her up and move her from one mat she goes to another.

[Philostopher]

7. Oh, and also ...

Thine anus is like unto the eye of Bast, and if you do not wave it in the eyes of each of your human housemates at least once per day, you will be thrown in the lake of kitty hell to paddle about for eternity because you will have failed to offer those lesser beings an opportunity to accept Bast as their personal messiah.

[BlackVelvetElvis]

11. LOL!

That is so funny.

[FizzFuzz]

13. I just have to share the secularized translation:

Look! Here's my butt! See? How do ya like that? My butt, that is. So what do you think of my butt? Here! Its my butt!!!!!!! Can we talk about my butt?

[miss_kitty]

8. If Thou Exists in a House of a Female

Thou Must Stand and Lay HEAVILY Upon the Genitalia of ALL Males who Visit Within.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

10. Actually, the only real cat commandment is

"Human, thou shalt worship me!"

This is why the Egyptians worshipped cats. The cats insisted on it.

[ikojo]

12. I am FELINE your god....who led cats out

of Egypt to be Gods...

Thou shalt have NO other gods before FELINE.

[demnan]

14. Thou shalt always proceed out the front door of the condo

to show the human I can leave too! For the human to grab me by the tail or chase me with a broom is sacrilege

[VOX]

15. Thou shalt play with sources of running water all the days of your life.

Be it the shower, bathroom sink, water cooler, or a simple bowl, thou shalt exalt in the wetness of water until the end of time.

[jdonaldball]

16. "Thou shalt kill anything smaller than your head. Thou shalt steal."

[noonwitch]

18. Thou shalt fling framed pictures from shelves and entertainment centers

My cat just loves to do that. I'm glad that I have carpeting.