love continues to mock me

[Blue_Tires]

I'm convinced that love is something that happens to other people...I've been seeing a co-worker for 3 weeks and I’m totally infatuated with her (total package: looks, body, brains, personality, and she seems to really interested in me, which is also a plus)…A MUCH higher caliber and class of woman than I’m usually used to dating…but unfortunately we never talked politics until now..

So we went to eat over the weekend, and we started talking about the debate…the moment she started to say it was a “tie” I knew she was a regular imbiber of GOP-branded Kool-Aid…I honestly could not believe it…she’s young (20s) a first-generation American (her farming family came from Eastern Europe), Ivy-league educated, and not overly rich…how the hell can this be?? We talk a little more, and I find out she’s anti-abortion, a pure free-market supporter, Clinton-hater, AND thinks we’re doing the right thing in Iraq, etc…On the plus side, she’s very pro-environment, so go figure…I let her know my own views (cynical, and to the left of about 70 percent of the posters here) and we have a little back-and-forth while still being cordial, even though my stomach was churning (remember I’m still trying to get with her)…

The other side is she admits to not being as up-to-date and informed of political issues as I (thanks DU)…We both agreed to look past each other’s differences, but now that I’ve had some time to think about it, I’m not that sure…I’ve never dated someone so far away from me on the political spectrum, so I’m honestly not sure how I’d handle this as the situation progressed…As a true liberal, my personal philosophy is to find common ground with opposing views and never to try to “convert” others to mine…I really like this lady, and feel that she was pretty close to perfect…I just have trouble separate HER from her views, since they were such a shock to me given her background….

I don’t know if I’m looking for advice in as much as I just wanted to rant a little, because you spend so much time, energy, emotion, health and money to find someone, anyone to connect with, just to have a warm body next to you, and it always ends up being SOMETHING about them to shoot your hopes down…I’ve already decided to stick with it a little longer and see where it goes(thankfully, she’s a more of a centrist repub)…just wanted to share it with the only people I trust politically…

[babylonsister]

1. Maybe you need to gently educate her as she's

freely admitted to being uninformed. Good luck!

[Rowdyboy]

2. I wish you luck, because you'll need it....

Thank God I found someone who is just a little to the left of me-makes it SOOOO easy.

[mhr]

3. The Relationship Is Doomed To Failure With Weak Fundamentals

eom

[A-Schwarzenegger]

4. "Love Laughs at Locksmiths." --Houdini

I just wanted to use that since I saw it last night
at the beginning of a Buster Keaton movie. Somehow
I'm sure it applies. Stay vulnerable, keep your powder dry,
and don't leave before the miracle happens.

[Hello_Kitty]

5. I could look past a lot of that stuff

But anyone who could look at me with a straight face and say that debate was a tie is delusional, end of discussion. Also, someone as bright and educated as she is should have some basic knowledge of current political issues, we have a war going on for God's sake! Something is seriously awry. Get as far, far, away from her as possible. That's my advice.

[Blue_Tires]

6. she has a couple relatives in the USAF

she qualified that before voicing her support for the war

[liberalhistorian]

12. I totally agree,

and I speak from experience since I'm a single mom in an area filled with repuke men! It just ain't gonna work, trust me on that one.

[Dr.Phool]

7. Gradually

Try to sow some cognitive dissonance. Sneakily. Don't preach, but at certain times get her to start comparing her views to the real world.

My wife voted Republican for over 20 years. We've been together for 10. She's very pro-life. But, now she agrees with me on about every issue. Even with her pro-life beliefs, she's voting and talking up Kerry. But, then again it helps to have an informed activist in the house. A lot of people have never been exposed to real liberalism before.

[tjdee]

8. "A tie" indicates something to worry about BUT

Carville and Matalin have been happily married for years.

But still. Bush did very, VERY badly in the first debate, and I know my opinion of Adrien Brody ( dream man #2 :loveya: ) would drop significantly if he thought that "I worked hard to love her" was equal to what Kerry was saying. Significantly. To me, political beliefs say a lot about what kind of person someone is.

I can totally understand not throwing out this gorgeous woman just because of political beliefs. Not being informed is certainly alright. There's the possibility that if she had more facts she'd agree with you politically. Maybe not. Uh, I'm rambling.

[Blue_Tires]

9. yeah

when she first said tie it took everything i had to not verbally berate her in the restaurant...but i guess if we can talk politics without yelling at each other that's a good sign, right?

I've been a part of DU for awhile, and I've seen quite a few "could you ever date a freep" polls...With what I know about her so far, this is a really great girl, and I know for a fact that if I knew beforehand of her political bent, I never would have said a word to her, much less asked her out...that reality makes me feel a little guilty

[tjdee]

10. Maybe that's WHY you didn't find out until now.

If I were somebody who believed in fate, I'd tell you that maybe that's WHY you didn't know, so that you COULD ask her out and get to like her. Maybe her political beliefs will change from having known you. Maybe she's the next leader of the revolution!!

Uh, okay, Had many carbs an hour ago.

But, I think its good that you're going to see how it goes. If she's as smart as you say she is, she'll be able to wade through the crap in her own time. Meanwhile, enjoy each other.

[slackmaster]

11. Generally speaking, coworkers are big potential trouble

I swore off of them about 24 years ago after getting myself into a very uncomfortable social situation.

[Blue_Tires]

13. we work in different offices in neighboring towns

so even if it blows up, it won't be awkward because professionally, our paths rarely cross....

and sorry for the delay in posts, I was nowhere near a computer last night...something else I meant to bring up which unsettled me during our conversation...Even though this girl has a rural upbringing, she is FAR from your average down home girl...parents are european, and she's traveled all over the place (study abroad, work abroad, you name it), and she's just at home in New York City and LA as the sticks...very cultured, highly educated (magna cum laude) and speaks 3 languages fluently (I speak about 1.17)...And she had the gall to talk about "The U.S. should be able to defend itself in the war on terror without needing a consensus from Europe"(!) is this a person I can ever reason with?? maybe my feelings for her and my own philosophies are both clouding my judgement...

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

15. I knew my wife when we were coworkers

And we have a thoroughly happy and solid marriage. The bottom line is YMMV.

[VOX]

17. Same here!

She and I have now been together for 11 years, married for four.
(And four of those first years were when we worked together.)

:toast:

[slackmaster]

18. I met my ex-wife through a work situation too

We weren't co-workers, rather both techies working for different companies that were both customers of the same software provider.

[kick-ass-bob]

14. No advice here. I will mock you as well.

[HEyHEY]

16. At least it's only mocking you - it keeps kicking me in the testacles.

[Huckebein the Raven]

19. At least it's kicking you only in the testacles

It has kicked me in the balls, stolen my car, and emptied my bank account.

[Tafiti]

20. I've always wondered how the hell...

...James Carville and Mary Matalin can maintain a healthy marriage. I personally would have such a hard time separating political beliefs from a person, because, it seems to me, that's part of who you are. It would be too much of a turn-off for me. I think it's great if you can though. But watch out, those Republicans have been hanging around the fundies too long and seem to feel the need to proselytize those with differing viewpoints.

[MrScorpio]

21. Don't worry. If the sex is good enough, she'll change her party loyalty

Just make sure to give IT to her GOOD!!

[Lydia Leftcoast]

22. Because of the anti-Communist thing,

first-generation Eastern European immigrants are often Republicans.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

23. If so tell her...

...that two of the Presidents with the most aggressively anti-Communist policies were Kennedy and Johnson.

[Blue_Tires]

24. believe it or not, it's more of a farming thing

her parents the farmers were outraged that some dems in their state would have the 'nerve' to grant farmer subsidies for not growing some things...her father is proud to never have accepted anything (she tells me)