Girl question for those with teenage daughters.

[kaitykaity]

What's the best age to take a girl to her first
OB/GYN appointment, and what do you say to her?
How do you get past, "They're gonna do what?"

[ogradda]

1. i took mine

when she started menstrating (at 12) i'm afraid all i could do was try and console her about the actual particulars what can you say about that? except we get thru it :)

[kaitykaity]

2. What did you say about why at 12?

Gawd, it's awful, isn't it?

[ogradda]

13. yeah it was

there are some things about being a girl that aren't too great and pelvics are up at towards the top of the list. and having to tell your kid she has to let some stranger poke around in her private parts .....jeez.

[rumguy]

3. just curious

why is a trip to the ob/gyn necessary at such a young age?

[kaitykaity]

5. I don't know.

That's why I'm asking.

[yvr girl]

6. Seems a bit young to me

If her period is normal, I don't see the reason. A teen needs an ob/gyn (if she isn't having obvious medical issues) once she becomes sexually active.

[Moonbeam_Starlight]

4. For a PELVIC exam??

I guess around 18 or so, or sooner if they are sexually active. But no need before then. Just keep going to regular doctor or pediatrician.

Again, unless sexually active or there are menstrual issues of concern/out of the ordinary.

My mother took me for a pelvic exam at 14 to see if I was still a virgin. How's THAT for shitty? When she asked the dr afterwards, he refused to give a judgement.

[kaitykaity]

8. I have some worries/concerns about this one

if you get my drift and I'm trying to figure out a way
to get the MOM to take the kid to get checked without raising
all kind of red flags about it.

I could be wrong, but as a survivor myself I just smell
something rotten. If I'm wrong, no harm done...

[Moonbeam_Starlight]

9. Ahhhh

well that's different.

Erm, the girl needs to come up with an out of the ordinary menstrual concern and then a trip to a GYN is warranted with no red flags going up.

[kaitykaity]

12. A little more complicated than that.

The girl is going to need to be dragged kicking
and screaming.

Don't want to get into too much detail b/c it could
result in a lost friendship. I'm trying to convince
the Mom that she needs to have the kid checked out,
but I need a reason other than my suspicions.

[sandnsea]

15. I'd call the school counselor

I don't think a medical exam would be definitive enough with a teen anyway. I'd call the school counselor and tell her a few specific reasons you're suspicious. Or maybe if she's mentioned a favorite teacher. I suspect things like this are more likely to be told through a confidant than outed through a forced medical exam. But I could be wrong.

[kaitykaity]

16. I was thinking more of making it for health

reasons, you know, nothing forced about it, just
making sure she's okay in general health-wise.

I was thinking because of doctor/patient confidentiality
that if she's okay no harm no foul but if there's a
problem then the doctor can handle what happens from
there.

I'm scared to death and don't know what to do. All I
have are my antenna doing flashdances above my head that
there's something wrong, wrong, wrong.

If my read of the situation is right, the girl is totally
and completely happy with the situation. Electra complex
I think it's called.

:shrug:

[sandnsea]

17. My point I guess

What would an exam show??

I only intervened once with any of my 4 kids' friends. In restrospect, I should have done it much, much sooner. Separate any personal biases and anxieties, then trust your gut, that's all I know. It's never easy knowing the right thing to do.

[kaitykaity]

18. Can I PM you?

:shrug:

I've already said too much in public.

[sandnsea]

19. Sure

I'll try to help if I can. Regardless, you'll probably feel better being able to sort it out.

[kaitykaity]

20. Thanks.

Sent.
:shrug:

[sandnsea]

14. Oh Moonbeam,

:cry: I'm so sorry that happened to you. I had a mom kind of like that too. :hug:

[madrchsod]

7. my wife clued me in

so i knew from then on it`s "don`t say anything" for a few days..but in all reality she`s been easy to live with...it was easy for us cause she knew alot about "it" from her girlfriends so we sort`a lucked out there!
opps-she had her first around 17..







'

[Nicole]

10. I didn't take mine

until she was 17. Before that our family Dr. did her exams, just like he does mine. Only if there is a problem do we go to the OB/GYN.

I prepared her by telling her exactly what would happen & why. She never questioned it, she just said gross & pass the Midol.

[Valerie5555]

11. Read in one of "those books" about "everything or nearly everything a gal

wanted to know about periods, but may be too mortified to ask," that any gal should at least see her gyno for the first time at 18 years of age and possibly earlier if she's engaged in "nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more, say no more," if anyone knew what I meant.


Maybe a gal also ought to run not walk to her gyno if she had certain kinds of "female troubles," that went to the extent that they couldn't be cured by a few Advils or Motrins.


On edit BTW Considering the content of the Starr Report, it was surprising the Congress hadn't impeached Clinton for "practising medicine without a license," but I would have to say okay, I admit it, I would sooner take a sex rogue as the American President over a "chickenpoop warmonger," any day.