What do you call the guy who finishes last in his class at Medical school?

[underpants]

Doctors cheer for US President George W. Bush (news - web sites) at September 2004 campaign rally. Bush and White House rival John Kerry (news - web sites) are pushing competing remedies for the crippled US healthcare system.(AFP/File/Paul Richards)

[Aristus]

1. Aww! Isn't that cute?

They can't wait to practice their love!

[underpants]

16. Pssst check the credentials

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0930041drdallas1.html

Cops Nab Fake Gynecologist

[ScreamingMeemie]

2. Shouldn't they be at work???

Healing people? :eyes:

[JuniorPlankton]

5. Stop asking hard questions

It's only one small step from this to asking * why he hasn't been at work these 4 years.

:kick:

[YellowRubberDuckie]

35. To which he'll reply...

"It's hard work being the president. It's hard work going down to Crawford and meeting with and schmoozing them thar leaders and diplomats from the other side of the world."
Duckie

[bif]

3. I'll bet not one of them is a doctor

Just like the "citizens" who stopped the recount in Florida.

[gumby]

4. You would call that person

Doctor.

[eddiebrowns]

6. this picture explains the theft of lab coats from local hospital

[Richardo]

9. I'm surprised they all don't have stethoscopes around their necks...

"See, you rubes? They're DOCTORS!!" :eyes:

[underpants]

15. Oooh look blue stitching too

I hate to bring THIS story up again but....

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0930041drdallas1.html

Cops Nab Fake Gynecologist

[Richardo]

21. Ah yes - the telling quote:

"Remo completed the look by wearing a stethoscope around his neck."

Amazing.

[underpants]

24. "Remo"

Sorry couldn't let THAT pass by.

Yes the stethescope relieved all fears that they may have been experiencing when they answered an ad in an "alternative" paper for FREE Gynecology services at a self-storage facility.

Geesh :silly:

[ScreamingMeemie]

36. and don't forget "fantasy exams".

Sigh....

[Parche]

7. doctors

Proctologists for Bush
Help Bush find Uranus
Dr Ben. Dover

[SemiCharmedQuark]

8. Last in their class at the Hollywood Upstairs Medical College?

The coroner? I am so sick of that guy!

[underpants]

14. HI! EveryyyyyyyyBODY!

:bounce:

[kitkatrose]

25. HI Doctor Nick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:bounce:

[pagerbear]

10. Saw the Bush commercial about medical reform last night

Was appalled.

[RaleighNCDUer]

11. Doctor. And don't think it doesn't scare me.

And tort reform protects them.

[SemiCharmedQuark]

12. Actually I'm not surprised by this...they can screw the rest of us royally

U.S. doctors earn absurdly high fees compared to other countries like GB and Canada. Some came to speak at my school and when I asked about reform they sat there and told me basically that "bein' a doctor is hard" and they deserve their fees.

[liontamer]

17. actually there is a point to be made there

compared to other countries where education is well funded, being a doctor in america is EXPENSIVE, many doctors finish school with 6 figure debt. And during their residencies they don't make that much money. By the time private practice rolls around, many doctors really do need the money.

Lawyers on the other hand, are money grubbing whores. Most could pay off their debt within 3 years of working

[SemiCharmedQuark]

20. True, but still...

By the end of a doctor's life they've made back their money over and over and over and over again.

Whatever happened to "doing it for the love of saving lives" or whatever crap they used to say?

[liontamer]

26. many do

they work in hospitals, or they go abroad to high need areas. There are also a lot of older doctors who no longer need the money and just keep saying patients because they like to do so.

But if you're talking about the average family doctor in his or her late 30's or early 40's, he or she is in major debt, and probably tied to insurance companies who suck up more money.

[SemiCharmedQuark]

27. Yeah, it is the insurance companies most at fault.

However, I suspect *these* doctors are not the typical middle class doctors.

[Xithras]

28. LOL, my sister is an MD

Outside of pediatrics and emergency medicine, I doubt you'll find a large percentage of doctors who really do it to help people. Sure, they'll SAY that to the public and their patients to make them comfortable, but the truth is that doctors, just like you or me, do their jobs to pay the bills and put their own kids through college. My sister was actually studying to be a veterinarian when she got tired of seeing suffering puppies all day and switched to human medicine (did you know that it takes more college to become a vet than a human doctor?) My parents weren't thrilled at having her change colleges, but many of the credits transferred and she was able to finish her MD relatively quickly.

She's told me more than once that, behind closed doors, most doctors aren't really into the whole "for the love of helping people" thing. They wear a smile and actually practice bedside manner as students, but when the curtain is drawn most doctors see patients the same way computer techs see PC's and mechanics see cars...as a broken system that needs to be repaired. They HAVE to mentally dehumanize many of their patients just to avoid being overwhelmed by the amount of suffering they see every day.

BTW, my sister made $160k last year, and half of it went to loans. The medical center she works at is closing next year (bought out by a medical association thats merging it with another facility), and she's already been informed that she's being laid off. Since she is a single mother of three, she doesn't want to uproot them to move to an area where she can get another job at a medical center, meaning that she's being forced to open a private practice with almost no savings. Doctors are NOT immune to the same job pressures we all face, and for the most part are simply trying to keep their heads above water financially. Unless you're one of the really in-demand specialists, life is NOT all about golf dates, world vacations, and flashy homes along the river side.

[SemiCharmedQuark]

33. I didn't mean any offence to your sister.

God willing and with His help, I will be a vet (8 years, I know, I know). Anyway, I do understand doctors have the same bills as we do. My psychiatrist was telling me how large a percentage of her paycheck goes to the insurance companies and how it's very difficult to get clients without being with an insurance company.

[gpandas]

39. ah yes,

this, of course, explains doctors near unanimous support for repukes, and opposition to health care for all americans.

[Xithras]

40. My sister actually is a rethug

First, most doctors don't actually oppose universal health care (my sister loses $30k+ a year to uninsured patients who never pay up), they just oppose health care plans that will add more needless paperwork or regulations to the process, or plans that will turn them into glorified government employees. They also tend to oppose the "soak the rich" tax plans that most Dems propose to pay for it all. She makes $160k a year, and would be making nearly $200k a year if all of her patients paid their bills, and qualifies as "rich" under most peoples definitions. After paying her loans and insurance, she brings home only about $50k a year, qualifying her as middle class and barely paying her mortgage and allowing her to raise her boys. If her tax rates were increased dramatically she would quite literally go bankrupt.

If you want to get doctors on our side we need to draft national healthcare guidelines that also make student loan payments 100% tax deductible and allow a writeoff for malpractice insurance. If you do that, MD opposition to nationalized healthcare will largely evaporate. I'm not saying they'll become Democrats, because many doctors associate the Democratic Party with the trial lawyers that make their lives a living hell (in five years of practice, my sister has been sued numerous times, and always over the stupid stuff.) Since many doctors see lawyers as the enemy, that association prevents them from joining our party even though many of them agree with the Democratic platform on almost every other issue.

[gpandas]

43. why, in the physician malpractice issue, is the fact that phsicians..

are fucking up so much never discussed? we all know the horror stories of leaving instruments, even towels, in patients. how can a surgeon remove the wrong breast,ever,ever,ever? maybe if we addressed issues such as these, and the soaring costs of medical care in general, we could reach a solution much better than surrendering our right to seek redress when harmed by the actions of others.

[Xithras]

44. Those suits are uncommon

My sister once had a lady come in complaining of mild fever, stuffiness, etc. Since she'd had her flu shot, my sis diagnosed her as having a cold and sent her home. The next day the lady was taken to the hospital for high fever and nausea (symptoms that didn't exist when my sis examined her), and was diagnosed as having the flu. She sued my sister for malpractice DESPITE the fact that neither flu nor cold is curable and won $15k

She had another patient that came to her complaining of a mild headache that had lasted for several hours. Because there were no other symptoms and he admitted to stress, she recommended that he go home, take an aspirin, and relax in a dark room. As he was driving home he had a stroke in his car, and he later sued her, AND WON, over $250k in damages because she didn't have a CT scan done on a patient who's only complaint was a mild headache. According to the medical books she did everything right, but according to the lawyers and jury she was "negligent".

There are more, and they're all as equally stupid. Even the one she was victorious in cost her over $15k in lawyers fees before it was done. There are lawyers who specialize in turning the most pathetically trivial mistake, or even APPEARANCE of mistake, into a lawsuit. They keep the damage requests down to make it unfeasible to bring in expert witnesses, but this continuous nickel and diming is driving people out of medicine. It's easy to say "oh, I'm only asking for $10k. He made $200k last year and can afford it", but when it happens over, and over, and over again it causes your malpractice rates to go through the roof. THIS is why there are so few GP's today, and is why my sister is looking at specializing in something specific to get out of regular treatment.

Oh, and she is one of these doctors who also refuses to treat lawyers.

[gpandas]

49. she won and had to pay her lawyers?

i was involved in a lawsuit (non-medical), and was told by my attorney that i would have to pay defendants lawyer costs if i lost. what state? why didn't her insurance cover these costs? i realize that dishonesty is rampant in the u.s.a. the cost of insurance for all people constantly rises. of course insurance companies thrive with ever-increasing assets. so you admit that most claims are of the small potatoes type. what would having a cap on awards have to do with these lawsuits? as far as the government subsidizing doctor's education or insurance costs, i'm not a fan. as in the "family" farm, no person is forced to own a farm, in the matter of doctors, no person is forced to become a doctor. also, please remember, my remarks are not personal, but are directed to the ama, the most powerful labor union in the country's history, and their stated aims.

[Surf Cowboy]

41. No offense,

but I have the feeling that you haven't the foggiest idea of that about which you speak. For how many years have you been an attorney?

[LibLabUK]

23. Well...

If it's any consolation, British doctors had to be bribed in 1948 to join the NHS. Now most doctors look down on their private-only brethren.

And let's not forget the pay-rate for NHS consultants begins at about £60K ($108K) and can rise to above £90K ($162K), and that is before you factor in the fees they get from the private patients that they see.

[SnowGoose]

32. My wife is an intern

Listen, do you have any idea how much debt we have? I won't say, but we could have bought a house for (much) less. She grieves frequently that she'd like to change careers, but if she did, we'd be financially ruined forever. Think about that - she's absolutely trapped. Death would be her only escape at this point (and the dirty little secret is that it happens all the time. It's happened to people we know).

On top of that, the hours are so bad they had to pass a freaking *law* to say that the hospitals couldn't work these young doctors more than 80 hours per week (in my worst jobs I've never had to work those kind of hours for more than a week or two at a time). And guess what: it's violated all the time! I've seen it. Week after week.

They passed a law that said you shouldn't work the doctor more than 30 hours straight. Thirty hours straight! Guess what: it hasn't protected my wife - it's violated all the damn time! Can you imagine 30 hours straight of treating patients? Well imagine even longer than 30 hours - the blood, the feces, the puke, the contagious diseases, the complaining, the threatening nut cases, the anger, the fear, the dying, the grieving families...

There's not enough money in the world to make up for what this job has done to my wife, and our life together. We've already decided to *vigorously* dissuade any children we have from pursuing a career in medicine.

Fuck medicine.

[liontamer]

34. I'm sorry your wife is going through that

I got off that loop years ago. I respect anyone who makes it through without a rich spouse to help. Good luck!

[fob]

13. Dubya Cum Loser?

[ismnotwasm]

18. Just because you have a name tag that says M.D.

Doesn't mean you're not a raving lunatic.

[peekaloo]

19. kinda ironic for a guy that opted out of his military physical.

bend over and spread your cheeks 'Murka.

[landdaddy]

22. Veterans Administration Doctors!

Just my opinion from my experiences!
:evilfrown: :evilfrown:

[bearfan454]

29. Dr.

He/she are still a doctor.

[baldguy]

30. Surgeon General!

But only if youv'e given the GOP a LOT of money.

[CO Liberal]

31. Kinda Like "Lesbians for Buchanan"

:-)

[smirkymonkey]

37. Bill Frist?

I don't get it, are these guys Ph.D's in Phys. Ed or something? I wouldn't let one of them touch me w/ a ten-foot pole.

[texas1928]

38. Chiropractor?

Ducks and hides.

[DemBones DemBones]

42. True story. When I was teaching biology at a small college,

I had a student one year who had already completed a year of chiropractic college with a high average and decided he wanted to go the M.D. route. He soon learned he could not cut it in freshman biology, which was a class for non-majors as well as majors. He went back to the chiropractic college and is probably adjusting people today. Yikes.

To be fair, I know two M.D.s in this town who have skeletons in their academic closets, too, and they're allowed to prescribe drugs. Double yikes!

[texas1928]

48. A girl I graduated from High School with is a Chiroprator

I was in her hometown visitting and saw a commercial of hers on TV it was hilarious to see the Valedictorian from my high school, offering back alignments on tv.

[Redleg]

45. "Loser."

A person should feel ashamed to finish last in his/her class in any school. I like how the "doctors" in the photo are wearing their white lab coats (or whatever the hell they are called). Something tells me this group is heavily represented by proctologists.

[JVS]

46. Dr. Nick

[underpants]

47. Medical school?

Whaaaaaaaaaat's THAT?

[Bossy Monkey]

50. More truthfully it would be Failed Lab Experiments for Bush

but that wouldn't have fit on the sign

[DemBones DemBones]

51. They look like BABY Doctors for Bush. nt

[onebigbadwulf]

52. As a med student with a debt reaching 200k (interest excluded)...

I don't blame any doctor for supporting Bush. He's actively seeking award caps on pain and suffering which, regardless of what anyone says, will drive down and has been driving down malpractice premiums.

That's at least something to help us pay off the debt. What are Kerry and his malpractice lawyer sidekick doing to help?

[AVID]

53. a "good" doctor

[donheld]

54. Yo Mama

:evilgrin: