Uncle Bob....the letter I never wrote.

[ScreamingMeemie]

For you Uncle Bob:

You were the one who always sent birthday cards with $100 in them. For a child in the 70's, that was an unimaginable sum of money...a hero was born. You would come for visits and give us piggy back rides, play house, read stories, banter and joke with my dad. I never saw my dad happier than those times when his big brother was visiting. His son, named for the brother he so idolized growing up.

You gave your time to public service...First, in the Navy, and then as a deputy sheriff.We were so very proud of you. You were loved. I only hope you knew how much. Uncle Bob was almost a fantasy figure...a fairy godfather of our very own.

One day in 1988, my father came into the McDonald's I worked at. He never did this. He told me he just wanted to be with the people he loved. I had never seen such pain and sadness...yet he would not tell me...until later.

You see, he had received a phone call asking if this was the brother of Robert. Upon answering yes he was told,"You're brother died today. It was AIDS." Then nothing. They had hung up...as if the very contact of a 2000 mile phone call would somehow taint them with the stain of the disease...and left us to deal with so sudden a loss...so many questions. My father, in a heated, tear stained storm asking,"Why? Why couldn't he...wouldn't he tell us?" "I would have helped him?" I would have understood him. I would not have shut him out."

It was so difficult to hear of the horrible pain that had been your life at times, from those who knew you well. Those who told us of how they stripped your naval locker of our baby pictures, of wedding pictures...demanding to know who each person was...taunting you with horrid, horrid names...And then, when you came home, you were so frightened that your father would find out...your brothers. That's why you moved so far away...that's why you became the figure who popped in and out of our lives...all because you thought we wouldn't understand that being gay was not your choice. Your decision to live your life the way it was intended took you miles from us.

Would we have understood then? I was 18. I cannot say for sure. But I know, my dear, beloved Uncle Bob, I never, ever would have stopped loving you...for you were very much a part of my life...

Never a day goes by that I don't miss you,
Love,
Little Britches.

[MissMillie]

1. MrsG, that's so sweet

You were lucky to have Bob, and he was lucky to have you.

[ScreamingMeemie]

4. I still have my graduation announcement, addressed to him in my

dresser drawer. Thanks MM. :hug: This whole week has had me really thinking a lot about him.

[qnr]

2. You sure don't sound particularly grumpy {random thought}

Nice work

[ScreamingMeemie]

5. MrsGrumpy comes from a spoonerism I once fell victim to.

"MrsGrumpy will be very Harper". OoPs. It stuck.

Thanks qnr.

[Lavender Brown]

3. MrsGrumpy

:cry: :hug: :grouphug:

[ScreamingMeemie]

6. Thank you Winter.

He was the kind of guy that drew you in, and made you want him to never leave. :hug: :(