I have a problem with empathy!

[La Lioness Priyanka]

i have a self-destructive amount. is there a button i can switch off?

how do you people handle other people in pain...especially pain you have caused?

help!

[knowbody0]

1. it is indeed a curse

[politicat]

2. tell me when you find that button.

Then maybe I can go back to full time work without becoming a self-destructive bitch all the time. Being a shrink can be deadly.

How do I handle it? I bottle it up and take long hikes alone and play violent video games. And have bad dreams.

PCat

[BoX o BooX]

3. Please clarify:

Are you suggesting that other people feel?

This is news. I assumed it was just me.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

6. i know other people feel

question is: how much can you feel for someone else before you are self destructive?

[lightbulb]

4. Don't try to switch it off - that leads to the dark side

Suppression of natural human compassion is the essence of Freeperdom. Use it, don't lose it!

[Fenris]

5. One should tend to avoid inflicting pain on others.

When you hurt other people, what you feel is guilt.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

7. no i can tell guilt apart from sympathy/empathy

but this is my problem even i am not the person who hurt them

[SarahB]

8. I don't know.

I have similar problems. My only advice is that being true to one's self has to be primary no matter what the situation. Honesty is everything.

[ThomCat]

9. I help until I can't anymore. Then I hybernate.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

10. hmm..hibernation is a good thing!

[bloodyjack]

11. I don't understand

other people's pain?

I usually tell them that suffering is the fundamental nature of existence, and then I slap 'em. hard.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

13. lol!

i should try that!

[Solon]

12. Ever met someone devoid of Empathy?

I'm serious, I have actually known someone without it at all. I'm not talking about the freepers or people of that sort, they usually have selective empathy for their specific groups, like White Fundies. I'm talking about the type of person who literally cannot feel for other people. I knew this one guy who acted normal till you got into a conversation about others with him, then I noticed that he couldn't imagine being in anyones shoes, he didn't care for anyone at all. Its like a mental illness, I was so shocked, till I realized that he couldn't help it, I actually pitied him. Its like he was a selfish bastard by default or something.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

14. yes liontamer had a roommate like that

[BoX o BooX]

15. This is a sociopath.

Fear him or be his best friend always. There is no middle ground.

[Spider Jerusalem]

21. Or an autistic.

And autistics are not sociopaths; they are just not good at processing and displaying emotion, and whatever empathy or sympathy they feel generally doesn't get communicated.

[johnnie]

16. I feel your pain..

I was like a emotion sponge at one time. I have just learned to sit down and "let it out of me". Carrying other people's pain and baggage is not our job. It is fine to lend an ear, or soak in some of the pain, but if you are going to do that, you best learn to rid yourself of it.

[sniffa]

17. do you empathize with my apathy?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

20. no.

[arcane1]

18. indeed

join the club

[La Lioness Priyanka]

19. i cant join the club....its making me an emotional mess

[arcane1]

22. too late

you are already an honorary member, simply for posting this

[liontamer]

23. part of your problem is that you imagine how you would feel in a situation

stop doing that. That kind of identification goes beyond empathy

[La Lioness Priyanka]

24. obviously if i could stop it ....i would

maybe part of my problem is people around are constantly miserable.

[kermujin]

25. if you figure it out,

let me know. my son has that problem, too. :(

[La Lioness Priyanka]

26. will do!

look at the post above...maybe thats his problem too

[Nikia]

27. I have that trouble too

As a result, I am not angry at my husband or friends for more than a couple hours. I sometimes wonder if I have been taken advantage of in this way. For example, if my husband really wants to do something and feels really bad because I don't want him to do it, I end up letting him do it because I can't stand his pain that I'm putting him through.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

28. see part of my problem is i relent at the time

but then i feel angry later