"Medical Love Song" - Monty Python

[elperromagico]

Inflammation of the foreskin
Reminds me of your smile
I've had ballanital chancroids
For quite a little while

I gave my heart to NSU
That lovely night in June
I ache for you my darling
And I hope you get well soon

My penile warts, your herpes
My syphilitic sores
Your moenelial infection
How I miss you more and more

You dobie's itch, my scrumpox
Our lovely gonorrhea
At least we both were lying
When we said that we were clear

Our syphilitic kisses
Sealed the secret of our tryst
You gave me scrotal pustules
With a quick flick of your wrist

Your trichovaginitis
Sent shivers down my spine
I got snail tracks in my anus
When your spirochetes met mine

Gonococcal urethritis, streptococcal ballinitis,
Meningo myelitis, diplococcal cephalitis,
Epididimitis, interstitial keratitis,
Syphilitic choroiditis, and anterior u-ve-i-tis

My clapped-out genitalia
Is not so bad for me
As the complete and utter failure
Every time I try to pee

My doctor says my buboes
Are the worst he's ever seen
My scrotum's painted orange
And my balls are turning green

My heart is very tender
Though my parts are awful raw
You might have been infected
But you never were a bore

I'm dying of your love, my love
I'm your spirochaetal clown
I've left my body to science
But I'm afraid they've turned it down

Gonococcal urethritis, streptococcal ballinitis,
Meningo myelitis, diplococcal cephalitis,
Epididimitis, interstitial keratitis,
Syphilitic choroiditis, and anterior u-ve-i-tis

[jdots]

1. Ah sweet music to my ear

Ashcroft could do wonders to this ditty is this on any of thier records ?????? PLEASE I MUST HAVE A COPY OF THIS

[mr blur]

3. You can get it:

on "Monty Python Sings" which has all your faves in including the wonderful "Every Sperm is Sacred" and "Penis Song". Released on Virgin, Mont D1.

[enigma-e]

2. The FCC Song

Talking of Monty Python, you may want to download the FCC Song by Eric Idle. It comes in the .mp3 format and may take some time to d/l, even with a broadband connection, as it is 3.1 MB in size. But it is definitely worth the while.

The lyrics are this:

Here's a little number I wrote the other day while out duck hunting with a judge.


Fuck you very much the FCC
Fuck you very much for fining me
Five thousand bucks a fuck
So I'm really out of luck
That's more than Heidi Fleiss was charging me

So fuck you very much the FCC
for proving that free speech just isn't free
Clear Channel's a dear channel
So Howard Stern must go
Attorney General Ashcroft doesn't like strong words and so
He's charging twice as much as all the drugs for Rush Limbaugh
So fuck you all so very much

So fuck you very much, Dear Mr. Bush
For heroically sitting on your tush
For Halliburton, Enron, all the companies who fail
Let's send them a clear signal and stick Martha straight in jail
She's an uppity rich bitch
and at least she isn't male
So fuck you all so very much

So fuck you dickhead Mr. Cheney too
Fuck you and fuck everything you do
Your pacemaker must be a fake
You haven't got a heart
As far as I'm concerned you're just a pasty-faced old fart
And as for Condoleeza she's an intellectual tart
So fuck you all so very much

So fuck you very much, the EPA
For giving all Alaska's oil away
It really is a bummer
When I can't fill my hummer
The ozone's a nogozone now that Arnold's here to say:
"The nuclear winter games are going to take place in LA"
So fuck you all so very much

So what the planet fails
Let's save the great white males
And fuck you all so very much