"I want to buy a predug ditch"--Today's Customer from Hell

[jmowreader]

I asked this customer if I could help him.

"Yes, I'd like a pre-made French drain."

'Sir, we have the things you'll need to make a French drain, but we don't have premade French drains.'

"Lowe's has pre-made French drains."

'No sir, Lowe's doesn't have pre-made French drains. No one has premade French drains. Lowe's has the parts for one, but you have to make them yourself.'

(Customer is now screaming) "I want a pre-made French drain, dammit! Call your manager!"

'Sir, a French drain is a ditch. You put a piece of perforated pipe in the bottom of the ditch and fill it in with gravel. That's all a French drain is. They don't come pre-made.'

"Oh...er...uh...do you have the perforated pipe?"

'Yeah, all you want. Come this way.'

[da_chimperor]

1. An angry German man once threatened to sue me while I was at work

I was working the register (at Kinko's) and a customer came up to me and told me he was 'going to sue the shit out of me and the company' if we didn't give him his order right away. He was far from pleasant. It's good that your customer from hell had the decency to be embarrassed.

[BoX o BooX]

3. The ones who threaten to sue are the BEST!

I hand them my business card and ask them to make sure to spell my name right.

[PBX9501]

7. Have you seen the "pop copy"

Dave Chapelle skit.

If you have ever worked or visited a copy shop it is the funniest skit ever.

"Why would we treat the customer this way, because we just dont give a fuck."

[smiley_glad_hands]

2. French Drains.

If I tell a client that their going to need a French Drain-- I'll get a dirty look. Also known as a LGMI -- Lateral Groundwater Movement Interceptor---little technical but beats the dirty look. I work in the rural and suburban part of the state by the way.

[Spinzonner]

4. Why are you people always so uncooperative

Don't you know the customer is always right ?

Even if s/he lives in an alternate universe ...

[Diana52]

5. Lowes & Home Depot

Every single time I have been in either of these places, I have witnessed a customer acting nasty and ugly with store employees.

What's up with that??

[BoX o BooX]

6. Home improvement is stressful.

Also, people are assholes. I proved it. Through science. I made a chart.