JEEBUS!! - Sat In A 3 Hour Meeting Explaining To The Owner Web Design

[matcom]

:argh:

Owner: "Why does it take a couple of weeks to develop a web site?"

Me: "Well, you have made over 20 changes just since last Thursday alone!"

Owner: "I LOVE the graphic work! But why does it take 4 days to do that?"

Me: "Sir, there are 57 different images that make up what you now see on the screen"

Owner: "Wow. 57 different images? I really like that."

Me: "Now you understand why it takes time to develop what you want"

Owner: "I still don't understand why it takes you so long."

Me: "Sir, I have to manipulate every single image and THEN put them all together"

Owner: "Well, I don't know anything about web design. Can't you do it faster?"

Me: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

:argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh::argh:

[Fenris]

1. But can you do it faster?

:D

[Hawkeye-X]

2. Well, at least you get paid.

I had to deal with a very annoying sister who demanded changes by the second when dealing with Native American GOTV effort. Got paid zilch. And all in less than 1 week before the conference..

http://www.navoting.com/index.html

Hawkeye-X

[arwalden]

3. Well... Why Can't You Do It Faster???

It sounds like a reasonable question to me. :hi:

Why don't you just steal images from other people's web sites? Wouldn't that be faster?

-- Allen

[displacedtexan]

4. Fucking idiots!

Hand him a manual (or direct him to a web design website) and see how far he gets on his own.

Stupid people don't know how stupid they are:

http://www.apa.org/journals/psp/psp7761121.html

[miss_kitty]

11. but he wore the JUICE!

:shrug:

[redqueen]

5. Does it detect tachyon beams?

Well, does it?

[mdmc]

6. I bet some one from Hyperbad could do it faster

(me running from this thread) :~)

[jpgray]

7. Don't feel too bad. When I did saleswork for my bro's company

We had an employer that actually used "touch base" and "get on the same page" in the same sentence. My soul left my body at that point.

[ghostsofgiants]

8. Ugh, I fucking hate that shit.

Luckily the folks I've designed for have understood that it takes time.

[slappypan]

9. Ah the joys of ignorant clients

"You mean you drew that yourself? Designers can draw? I thought everything just somehow appeared the computer."

"No, I don't know what I want. Can't you just keep creating stuff until you somehow produce what I want, even though I have no idea what that is yet?"

"I love your layouts! Exactly what we need!" The next day: "I showed these to my boss, and he doesn't like any of them. I was completely wrong about what we needed, everything I told you was wrong, and now you have to start over."

[matcom]

10. worst part is.............

I AM THE FULL TIME WEBMASTER OF THIS COMPANY!!!

:grr:

[miss_kitty]

12. well then, there's no excuse

not to have it done the day before it's requested!

:evilgrin:

[denverbill]

13. Just mumble something about Sarbanes-Oxley and walk off.

If he keeps pestering you, just explain how you have to do core load testing and marginal redundancy analysis. That shit takes time.

[WilliamPitt]

14. Guess that means you'll have to do it faster.

:P

[matcom]

15. i'll shove it up his ASS!

and yours too! :D

[DS1]

16. I think you should use bitmaps, and make the site talk

[matcom]

17. you fucker

he wants a "Talking Email SPAM Campaign"

:argh:

[DS1]

18. Your boss

[Misunderestimator]

19. HAHAHA.... That's why the team I have just loves me...

Someone asks me how long something takes... I go to the developer, we work out an estimate, I pad the hell out of it, they don't dare question my numbers, and then we always bring everything in on time. It's an art it is.

On edit... I sympathize with you from my programming days... those clickers are such dumbf*cks.

[Kadie]

20. Yes, I can do it faster.

But I guarantee that it will look like crap. he he he