Dookus and the secret panda smuggling operation.....

[HEyHEY]

AP - Los Angeles
Authorities believe they have captured a major player in a panda smuggling operation. .
A southern Califronia man and member of the notorious left wing discussion board, Democratic Underground, was arrested in his Southern California home early Yesterday.
THirty-Eight-year old "Dookus" known to friends as "Dookus" is being held by Los Angeles county police under suspicsion of Panda Pilfering, a charge carrying a maximum five year sentence.
Police would not comment on what lead them to suspect Dookus, but would say it was the result of careful investigation. Dookus is being held in police custody and will appear in Los Angeles County court on Wednesday.

[shraby]

1. They spotted him instantly by the

underwear and knew that was the perp.

[Dookus]

2. friggin' canucks

I'm not in Southern California! Of course, when ya live at the North Pole, EVERYTHING is south....

and I'm 43, dammit! And you call yourself a journalist.... Who ya writin' for these days, the Moosefuck Gazette?

[skygazer]

3. I know

My relatives back east thing San Francisco is about an hour away from LA. And they have no idea where San Jose is.

[Dookus]

4. lol

I know. When LA has an Earthquake, friends and family call to see if I'm OK.

Just like my sister in Rochester, NY got calls on 9/11 to see if she was safe.

[HEyHEY]

9. I didn't know personal details is all

I'm west coast, I know exactly where all the cities are

[Dookus]

5. An official response from Dookus

I am saddened to see this kind of personal, sleazy attack so soon before an election.

As indicated above, the report has my age and location wrong. The whole story cannot be trusted. This is part of a vast Canadian conspiracy to sully my reputation and damage my family.

Besides, I wasn't smuggling those Pandas across state lines for sexual purposes. In most cases.

Freedom-hating medical-care loving Canadians with ducks on their money are a fine bunch to talk.

Were I a lesser man, I would bring up Hey-Hey's numerous arrests for beaver-diddling. But I will not do that. I could mention his history of walrus-raping and moose-tipping, but that's not what I want this discussion to be about.

I would rather focus on his seal-clubbing.

[HEyHEY]

8. Those responsible for Dookus' statement, have just been sacked

We don't know how, in prison he gained interenet access, but he managed somehow

[Dookus]

10. My mind is plugged

directly into the internet. Every passing whim and fancy becomes a post, somewhere.

You should check out the porn sites to really appreciate this talent.

[Goathead]

6. Hey!!! You stole that from The Simpsons!

Moe was smuggling pandas in from China ...or was it Killer Whales.

[Goathead]

7. Just noticed your handle "HEyHEY"

...or should I say Krusty The Clown

http://www.mapofspringfield.com/