What's the alternative to sex?

[TrogL]

I've got a migraine and I'm not seeing straight. I conflated two lounge threads ("What's the Alternative to Church?" and "Being the opposite sex") and started remembering some of the idiocy trotted out during 60's sex education lectures.

[ewagner]

1. The true alternative to sex

is marriage.

[ArkDem]

8. It's not often that I see wisdom as pure as what you

exhibit.

[Brucey]

12. But marriage is one of the chief causes of

divorce.

[Kolesar]

15. that's a Frank Burns quote from M*A*S*H

Hotlips was pressuring him to divorce his wife and marry her. Burns was resisting because his wife had all the money. One of his stalling remarks was "marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce". Then they got interrupted and the scene ended.

[Ellen Forradalom]

30. Verily thou speakest the truth

*sigh*

[leftofthedial]

31. took the words right out of my mouth

[liberalhistorian]

2. As a sex-starved single mom

for whom it has been a very long time since I experienced any "intimacy", I can honestly say that I'm going insane, lol!

[illini]

4. Are you advertising?

hehehe Just kidding!!!

[liberalhistorian]

18. Why, are you buying?

I like fancy, romantic dinners with candlelight and flowers before anything "happens", lol!

[leftofthedial]

32. I know someone with $600 to spend on dinner . . .

(pardon the DU joke)

undesired celibacy IS maddening, isn't it?

[plcdude]

42. are yoiu

near Dayton?

[bif]

3. Beer.

n/t

[WoodrowFan]

5. Chocolate (nt)

[demnan]

6. Self-stimulation

of course

[ArkDem]

22. That is sex

.

[pfitz59]

7. Parthogenesis?

Asexual reproduction? No need to do "the nasty"!

[Cheswick2.0]

17. LOL

good answer

[enki23]

9. online political forums?

nt

[prolesunited]

13. So, do the number of posts

people make have an inverse relationship to how much sex they are having?

[Kolesar]

16. 3409, that's pretty big post-count, Prolesunited!

har har

[prolesunited]

21. Damn!

Ya got me pegged! ;-)

[ewagner]

27. Rats!

I'm really getting the post counts up!

[prolesunited]

35. Apparently, that's the only thing

you're getting up. <rimshot> :P

Sorry, couldn't resist. Misery loves company and all that. ;-)

[ewagner]

37. Loved the rimshot!

great sense of humor!

[radwriter0555]

10. COOKING. And oddly, a great deal of satisfaction can be achieved

in creating something amazing in the kitchen.

I got some chocolate cookies that are better than sex ANYTIME.

[BiggJawn]

20. And eating, too...

Hey, beats crying yourself to sleep every night...

But it can really make you heavy...

[ScreamingMeemie]

48. You beat me to it. Agreed!

:thumbsup:

[Birthmark]

11. More sex

[HereSince1628]

14. Depends, do you mean sex as a verb or an adjective?

As a verb I opt for oversexed rather then undersexed

[Terwilliger]

19. get away from the computer

and dance or play

(exercise :-) but I clicked other :smoke: )

[regnaD kciN]

23. Taking matters into your own hands...

..or, in the words of the great philosopher Socrates, "know thyself."

:evilgrin:

[SPICYHOT]

24. eat chocolate maybe? ??

once a priest told me that when women eat chocolate is because they need something, me too.

[AlienGirl]

25. Work and money!

I have found that focusing on getting satisfaction through making money has made me almost entirely not miss that whole sex and romance thing.

For sex I can "kill kittens," I have friends for affection--who cares about that romance stuff, anyway? It's just a good way to get hurt.

Tucker

[Hubert Flottz]

26. If you're a man look at a photo of Ann Coulter that will wilt you.....

down in a hurry! Ladies just look at Prince Bush on TV and you'll start to :puke: and forget all about fornicating!

[librarycard]

28. vibrator

Ladies, get one if you don't already own one.

[Kamika]

29. The TRUE alternative to sex

[dmr]

33. Bush brings out the frigid in me

:scared: brrrrr ....

[ForrestGump]

34. Binary fission

[Darth_Kitten]

36. Buy a cockatiel!

:loveya:

it's not sex but it's all about love. :)

[populistmom]

38. There is none

For me, if sex with someone else is out and sex with myself wasn't an option, I'd be a very mean, horrible person who was probably 300 pounds due to excessive comsumption of chocolate.
I don't even want to imagine the thought.

[newyawker99]

39. Congrats populistmom!! 200 posts

:toast:

[populistmom]

41. Thanks.

It's only taken me since last December. I started off really slow, but have been moving along more quickly in the last couple of weeks.

[sangh0]

40. Losing one's attachment

to desire.

[Booberdawg]

43. masturbation

:shrug:

[chiburb]

44. Sleep? n/t

.

[TrogL]

45. *sigh*

The other day I spent over an hour carefully constructing a long lounge post.

It sank without a trace.

This one, composed in about two minutes on a whim, has been up for days.

[sangh0]

46. There's a lesson in there

I'd figure out what it is, but I'm too busy not having sex :-)

[FloridaJudy]

47. The Internet

'Nough Said