How do I nicely say "don't buy me anything for xmas, 'cause you're

[Phillycat]

not getting anything either"?

I am sending out a mass email to everyone I know saying, please don't buy me a Christmas present because I'm not buying any this year. I don't want it to sound rude or that I'm a scrooge--I love Christmas. But I don't think it's a good idea to go on an orgy of spending when I have no idea what's going to happen to the economy in the near future.

Do you think this is too Scrooge-ish? What wording should I use to convey, "I love this season and everything about it, but NO PRESENT FOR YOU!"

[Carolinian]

1. Cash makes a great gift. As do favors. Buy from Ebay.

[Phillycat]

4. No, I must have been unclear. I meant, I don't want to buy anything

this year. Meaning spend no money at all. I was just looking for help with the wording. Thanks anyway though!

[Midlodemocrat]

2. Why not suggest a donation

...in lieu of gifts, tell everyone that you are making a contribution to a charity this year (The amount to be determined by you), and suggest they do the same? We have been doing that for several years, because quite frankly, the older I get, the less stuff I need.

[demnan]

3. Dear Friends

I have an idea for Christmas - let's limit or ignore the gift giving frenzy this year. I've decided for various reasons, from political to economical, that it would be better if I did not buy gifts this season.

Let's celebrate the season by getting together and enjoying each other's company but please do not purchase a gift. Thanks.

[Phillycat]

5. PERFECT--thank you so much!

I would think people would be relieved--one less person to buy for, after all. Thank you, you rock. :yourock:

[Modem Butterfly]

6. We explain that we don't celebrate xmas

Most people are understanding, even if they are puzzled by the reason (we're atheists). I suggest just explaining to them that you've decided that it would be kinder to your wallet (and theirs!) to forgo gift giving this year. If this is not acceptable, perhaps you should announce a limited gift exchange, or even have a White Elephant Xmas exchange - with a contest for the worst gift.

[The Spirit of JFK]

7. How about a big party?

You can mention the state of the economy...and simply say that while you hate to seem like a Scrooge, you like them all very very much...and instead of gifts, why not pool resources for a nice holiday party.

[DrZeeLit]

8. Tell the truth in the moment.

You say it from your heart, it's real, then people listen. If they don't, you did your best.

What I did when I was really poor (and I mean single mom on welfare) -- I printed up certificates and gave money (little, but some) to charities in the name of the person. I picked the charity with an eye to that person's interests.

My aunt with eye problems - gave to Guide Dogs for the Blind.
My sister, whose father-in-law died of heart attack, Am Heart Assoc.
My brother, who is big name in golf, Junior Golf (which started him out). And so on...I have six siblings; I made these "family gifts" to cover the in-laws, too.

Nobody would or could quibble with that -- I mean, what's more Christmas than GIVING?

I didn't have to go to a mall or park or wrap or anything.
It was GREAT.

And you know what? I felt great, too.

[lilymidnite]

9. I just my letters on Saturday

Short and nicely worded.

"<partner> and I have been thinking about Christmas recently. We both feel that it has become too corporate and commercial.

In light of this we want to let you know that we are opting out of material gift giving. We hope you honor our decision.

A donation will be given to a progressive cause.

<me>"

[amazona]

10. how I did it

It is not too Scrooge-ish. It is a fantastic idea because it really takes the pressure off your family and friends to buy you gifts.

I did this many years ago and don't remember the exact wording but it was something along the lines of this:

My gift for you this Christmas season is to offer you more time for the spirit of the season and less time in the shopping mall. I would like to ask you to give me the same gift. By not exchanging physical presents, we are giving each other the most precious gift of all and the only one that can never be replaced -- the gift of time.

I don't remember anyone taking offense, I think most if not all of them were delighted that they were off my gift list and they could take me off their gift list! Now I have family and friends trained so I am not expected to exchange gifts with all and sundry. It's great!

P.S. There is one friend who does not honor this request. He is sort of nouveau riche and once he became wealthy, it became his pleasure to spend a great deal of money on gifts. But he always reassures me that it is his pleasure and he doesn't expect something expensive in return. If it is truly a friend's pleasure to shop and to buy, then make an exception for that friend and find a craft item or something else personal you can do for him in exchange. He mentioned this year that he would like me to assist him in planning his landscaping as my gift to him, and that I am glad to do.

[Phillycat]

11. Awesome--thank you!!

:yourock:

[jackelope72]

12. I've simply told everyone in my family

that they're either getting handmade gifts or little things like jars or tins of candy or nuts. The only exception will be my 8-year-old brother, who will probably be getting that Gameboy he's been wanting for a long time. Especially since he came up to me a week or so ago and told me that he understood if he didn't get much, because money is so tight, and all he really cared about was that we were all together. The kid is an angel, let me tell you! (Either that, or he REALLY knows how to play his big brother.)