If Democrats Were Exactly Like Republicans Say We Are

[Arkana]

If Democrats Were Exactly Like Republicans Say We Are:

I hate freedom, I hate the United States.

I want Osama to be President and I want the UN to delegate our foreign policy.

I love big government and want them to do everything for me. I can't think for myself.

I danced in the streets on 9/11 and cheered for the terrorists who carried out Allah's will. (mods, please don't kill me...I've been accused of doing this by some wingnuts, so I thought it was a good one--and remember, this is a joke!)

Anyone have any more?

P.S. Please don't ban me, mods!

[Love Bug]

1. I worship Satan and kill babies!

How's that?

[Arkana]

2. Good one

But change it to "eat babies" and it's even better. :evilgrin:

[Goldom]

3. We're rich elitists....

...who want to give handouts to the poor.

That's logic, huh.

[jdots]

4. I am the Anti EVERYTHING

DESTROY ALL MONSTERS !

[alevensalor]

5. We're all communists who want everyone to have insurance, and bankrupt the

government.

~A!

[benburch]

6. I encourage young people to becomes gay or lesbian. nt

[demnan]

8. And I encourage them to marry!

:evilgrin:

[benburch]

11. Marry! I'm still working on getting them to be promiscuous!

So, now I'll have to get them to CHEAT, too.

Is a Liberal's work never done???

[Dogmudgeon]

7. I'm in the pay of The Frankfort School

Whatever that is.

(I think it's the New School for Social Research in NYC near NYU.)

--bkl

[skygazer]

9. I want to merge the United States with France

and give up all power to make any decisions on our behalf.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

10. It's pretty crazy.

I live here; I have a job; I pay taxes. But of course I don't support Bush because I want terrorists to come and blow us all up (which could include me, my city, and my family). I want to raise taxes for the benefit of freeloading poor people, even though I pay taxes myself. I want the laws to benefit ciminals, even though I'm as vulnerable to crime as anybody else. I hate the United States, although I continue to live here, pay my taxes and obey the laws. I volnteered as a poll monitor to be sure everyone could vote. Until 11/3, I even put up a flag every morning. But, yeah, listen to the Republicans tell you I hate America. Feh.

[zbdent]

12. I'm still trying to figure out how Dem/Liberal women

are supposed to abort all their unborn and yet have crack babies for the welfare checks . . .

Is there a "head exploding" smilie?

[Burma Jones]

13. I want to ban High School and College Football

I want to make every hateful thought a crime
I want to make everyone a vegetarian
I want everone to drive electric cars
I want to put Christians in Jail
I want to replace the military with meditators beaming goodwill to our enemies.......

I think these are some of the stereotypes..........

[KellyPaDem]

14. I want to start the take a terrorist home program.

Very similar to take your daughter to work but you have to sponsor a hard working terrorist.

Also I want to hand out condoms to toddlers.

[Worst Username Ever]

15. I want to ban the bible /nt

[bif]

16. "We've been at war with Christians for 15 years."

That's what some nut-job minister was quoted as saying in the Detroit Free Press on Sunday.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

17. I wish people would stop badmouthing Josef Stalin (nt)

[NoPasaran]

18. I want our soldiers to be armed with spitballs n/t

[niwi]

19. if we were....

I wouldn't have time to reply to this - I'd be getting an abortion right now!

[pagerbear]

20. I want to have sex with all the Republican men

I want them bad! I want to force them to have sex with me and to marry me and never, ever allow another Republican man to have sex with a woman. Ever.

[Arkana]

22. Right

First thing the Democrats will do is pass a law that requires the forced buggery of all straight, white, Republican men.

[pagerbear]

23. The homelier they are, the more we want them!

[jukes]

21. *AND*

we'd still be better than them!

[klook]

24. I want small businesses taxed heavily so they won't innovate

And I serve tofu, sushi, and latte at all my same-sex orgies!

If I had my way, there would be a cabinet-level Department of Hollywood that would dictate the country's values.

[Ellen Forradalom]

25. As a woman, I'm smelly, unkempt, and hairy

I braid my armpit hair, cherish my facial hair, reek to high heaven, and don't have a decent outfit in my closet.

[Arkana]

26. So, you're Ann Coulter then?

No, wait--you're Michelle Malkin! No, Laura Ingraham!

[Arkana]

27. kick for night crew