Republicans Call For Privatization of Next Election

[flvegan]

"When the average citizen hears the phrase 'presidential election,' he thinks of long lines at polling places and agonizing waits as election results are tallied," U.S. Sen. Rick Santorum (R-PA) told reporters Monday. "Putting the election of our public officials into the hands of private industry would motivate election officials to be more efficient."

"There's too much talk about the accuracy and fairness of our national elections, and not enough about their proficiency and profitability," Santorum added. "Who bears the brunt of bureaucratic waste? Taxpayers."

U.S. Sen. Conrad Burns (R-MT) called for an end to "big government overseeing the election of big government."

<snip>

From The Onion of course, on sale now on an internets near you:
http://www.theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4046&n=1

[Arkana]

1. All the news that's fit to print

nt

[liberal N proud]

2. The only motivation by privitazation would

the profit. who will pay the most for votes.
Selling votes on E-Bay

[NJ_Lib]

3. I think the main motive would be...

... to control the outcome...


This is just unfuckingbelievable....! Yeah, let's, let's just let Karen Huges and Doggy Dog Rove handle it next time... They'll be honest... They swear...

[flvegan]

4. It's satire...The Onion...hello? Is this thing on?

[Peace Patriot]

5. It's so close to the truth...

...it's hard to tell.

My hit: This wasn't an election. It was a used car deal! (--secret source code for vote tabulation owned by Bush Republicans? I mean, come on.)