Anyone else always screw up with the opposite sex before anything?

[HEyHEY]

I was at a ceremony for some people tonight after the first meeting I posted about earlier.
One of the girls involved in this thing was there and she' s pretty cute and when I first met her I was kinda interested but never got around to doing anything, plus I figured she wouldn't be interested and I didn't want to bother etc...

Well I saw her tonight, looking cute as ever, and she was laying on the flirt thick enough for even a dork like me to pick up. But alas I'm LEAVING MONDAY.

Banging head on desk.

I fucking knew I shoulda asked her out months ago

Anyone else perpetually do stupid shit like that?

[billyoc]

1. You mean today?

;)

[HEyHEY]

2. Yeah, may as well be daily

[JVS]

3. She's just flirting with you because she knows you'll be gone!

Invite her over for a roll in the hay and move on

[HEyHEY]

4. Well, I'm supposed to see her at the bar on Saturday

And yes, a hay roll will be attempted - although I'm rusty

[short bus president]

8. Dude, if you're rusty,

you may be suckered in by the temptation to use WD-40. Trust me - do not do this. It smells funny and is not generally a healthy product for long-term contact with mucuous membranes. Stick with water-based lubricants, and be sure to thoroughly rub yourself down with steel wool before the encounter.

Afterwords, a light coating of vegetable oil may help prevent further rust issues, and will give your coat a lustrous sheen.

[HEyHEY]

9. I tried brasso last time

Man was it shiny!

[short bus president]

11. Brasso might be OK.

Same with the rust/tarnish removers you can find at the drugstore. But what you really need to watch out for is anything marketed on late-night television by this guy:

[HEyHEY]

13. Is he wearing a Popeil toupee too?

[warrens]

5. Almost

I ended up with this cute Asian woman on the bus trips up to Wisconsin on the Kerry campaign and sort of thought she was not into me. At all. So I let it drop. She emailed me the other day and we're having dinner Saturday night.

[HEyHEY]

6. Well done old bean

[Cadence]

17. Wooo hooooo

Go Warrens...it's yur birthday!!! You should get her a single flower like a single red rose. It seems kind of "done" but the next day after a good date seeing that one red rose blossoming as a reminder...it works. I really notice when guys do the old fashioned gentlemanly things. Open the car door. Help me with my coat.

Now don't get me wrong I'm independent, self sufficient yada yada yada but all the "dating" has gone out of dating. I like the respectful, sweet gestures.

[Malebolgia]

7. Story of my life, buddy.

[JohnnyCougar]

10. How did you steal my identity?

And start posting my life story?

[Cadence]

12. Always!! I'm the worst flirt ever!

Guys hit on me a lot (o.k. maybe not a lot but sometimes) and I never get it at the ACTUAL TIME IT IS HAPPENING..it's always the next day or week then I think back and go hey!..was that?...I think...darn! I'm such a dork.

OR if I do get it when it's happening I always screw it up. For example:
This one time.. at band camp (see dork) no o.k., this one day before work I stopped at Starbucks not because I like coffee, I actually hate it but I like hot chocolate and the other cream frapuccino thingies...anyway next door was a bakery and as I was walking past the window with my hot chocolate I looked in and thought hmmm...a muffin would be good. So I go in and I'm ordering a muffin and this really cute guy in a suit walks in ( I love it when they're in suits) and he kind of gives me a funny shy look and then mumbles something to the girl behind the counter. To which she yells WHAT? Then he mumbles again. This time she hears him and he looks nervously back at me and smiles flirtatiously. So I smile. He says..."going to work?" I nod. He turns around and then back..."do you stop here often before work?" (At this point I was thinking God you are really cute! so I had to focus on what he just said) so I say ..."sometimes."
The girl hands him a muffin and then as she's walking away she says.."did you want a glass of whole or skim milk?" He quietly says "skim will be fine." Then he turns to me apologetically and says ..."You can't have a muffin without milk." I just look at him. So he turns around. Inside I'm thinking say something..say ANYTHING so I blurt ..chocolate cake!
He turns around. "Excuse me?" I say "Chocolate cake...you ummm..can't have chocolate cake without milk either" he smiles the waitress hands him his milk and me my change. He pauses and I... feeling like an idiot rush out the door.

You don't even have to say it.. I know....I'm a dork. I have countless numbers of these types of experiences.

[HEyHEY]

14. That happens to me alot!

Some girl in a coffee shop or something will flash a smile or comment. Then I stumble and mumble like a twit

Oddly I wear suits all the time. However I know for a fact it wasn't me you saw; Why? Cause the guy TALKED to you.

I'd of NEVER done that

[Cadence]

15. I know me too.

I can strike up conversations with anyone and everyone as long as I'm not attracted to them. But here's a little trick that I think may work. You have to pretend to yourself that you want nothing. Like when you talk to strangers your not attracted to. It's easy because you want nothing from them. That's the ticket... you pretend I'm just talking to you for no reason at all....
The only thing is eventually after you start talking them you have to be willing to take that emotional risk and ask them out otherwise you fall into that doomed "friends" category right away. But I'm saying just to get over that intial fear to at least gets SOME words out.

BTW suits are good! (Especially sexy when the mind behind it isn't a corporate conservative idiot.)
So are firemen uniforms!

[HEyHEY]

16. Exactly

That's the thing, I can charm the pants off everyone except a woman I'm attracted to.

[Cadence]

18. Do you have a type?

What attracts you?

[HEyHEY]

19. I kinda like the Nana Mouskouri type

:shrug:

Basically - without knowing the girl - if she looks like she may be artistic or liberalish and has some brains I'm in - I go ta real thing for glasses and shoulder lengthed hair too

[Cadence]

24. Ahhh had to look her up

O.k. I see. That's funny you say that "artistic or liberalish" I was at whole foods the other day and I saw a guy who has that "look" and even though he wasn't my typical "type" I was attracted to him. But as I was standing there I was thinking....but he probably wouldn't see that in ME because I don't think I look "artsy or liberalish" that was actually how I put it..to myself. Then I thought maybe I should change my outer apperance to reflect my inner world more .. then maybe I'd attract a different type of guy. I tend to get very material oriented guys.

[HEyHEY]

25. I think all girls get them

Cause women are posession to them.

Just like all rich looking guys get material women.... What is your type then?

[Cadence]

32. I'm not sure I have

a "physical" type. I haven't figured it out yet. Usually there is an intangible quality inside that comes through the eyes that will get me. Or if I'm not instantly physically attracted if he has a really incredible mind and heart...is kinda goofy, introspective, knows what he thinks but can and does question his own logic to grow, has a large capacity for empathy, isn't afraid of his emotions because he understands the value of them....I could go on and on. Democrat and doesn't follow an organized religion but is spiritual are two of the biggest.

I guess one physical characteristic is tall. I'm 5'6" which isn't totally out of the ordinary but I like guys to be taller than me when I'm in heels.

[HEyHEY]

26. Ahhh, Nana - you little Greek manx

If only I was born 50 years ago

[Cadence]

35. Huh? How old IS she?

[Abelman]

20. Such is the life

Of the Dork Class. I have suffered much for missing flirtations or pursuing imagined flirtations.

[HEyHEY]

21. That's why dorks are such drunks

[Abelman]

38. We should have...

a DU singles meetup.

And by some miracle and even number of boys and girls will show up.

And then...we'll all play Mario Kart!

[NickB79]

40. Can we have Halo too?

I love a dork who knows how to handle an assault rifle!

[bloodyjack]

22. I used to, before I gave up prospects of romance entirely.

Never could read women. They might be all over me and I would assume it was a cheap way of getting me to cooperate. So, yeah. I suck at life.

Now that's all changed. If a woman approaches me, I do not scamper off. I don't try to be charming or make interesting conversation. I don't buy them drinks, I refuse to crawl down their pants (much less compliment their appearance) or entertain them, and nothing happens. I never see them again.

It's far less confusing that way, I find

[HEyHEY]

23. That's where I'm at these days it seems

Mostly I don't talk to women cause it all seems fruitless and useless

[bloodyjack]

28. Did you know that alcohol is a great woman-deterrent

You just tell them to buzz the heck off

They get the message fairly quickly

[Cadence]

27. Well I don't blame you

if that's really what those women want..those are some seriously shallow women!

[bloodyjack]

31. the problem is that I could never be sure

I've been told I'm a horrible judge of character, so you can imagine how crummy I in dealing with a member of the opposite sex to whom I happen to be attracted

It's not the fault of any of those women that I think they always WANT something out of me that I'm not willing to give...like I said, I suck at life :]

[Cadence]

33. Well that doesn't mean

you suck at life. It just means you have some fears there that interfere with your ability to accurately see where people are coming from or trust that they could actually care about you.

All that is is beliefs that don't serve you. Everyone has those. Just takes identifying what the beliefs are and maybe getting them down on paper so you can possibly see them in a different perspective to find out how they got there and if they might be false.

Sometimes we take on beliefs from past experiences that aren't accurate and they become filters by which we see/judge future experiences and it can feel like we're stuck and it's hopeless but it's not.

Sometimes I think I suck at life and sometimes I think life sucks and sometimes I see someone doing something so utterly selfless and loving for someone else and gratitude well up in the other person's eyes...and I think..yeah life is cool. That's the ride I guess.

[Imperialism Inc.]

29. Yes.

I never realize a woman is flirting until later when my friends are wondering why I didn't take her home or something. Doh!

[HEyHEY]

30. Ever flirt by accident?

I have, I've been to dinner or something and think I'm being friendly with the waitress, then when she's gone my friends are like "Wow man you were harsh flirting" I always say "huh?"

[Cadence]

34. Ha Ha! I have

a guy friend that did that the other night at dinner. He seemed like he was really flirting with the waitress and I know she thought so to but he was oblivious. Later I was like you know that waitress thought you were into her and he was like what?! No!
But when he TRIES to flirt he's terrible at it.

I hate accidental flirting especially if you get rejected and you weren't TRYING! LOL. ahhh God that sucks.

My problem is going out with girlfriends of mine and their boyfriends. They (the boyfriend) always start flirting with me which I find really disgusting and refuse to participate in but it always effects my friendship with the girl. Soooo I have a lot of guy friends.

[NickB79]

36. Ever had a girl ask you what you thought about triamory?

So I met this girl at the bars, talked to her and her female friend for an hour, and then we went our seperate ways. My friend who was with knew her, and a few weeks later I got a phonecall from my friend saying to call this number, it was the girl from the bar and she wanted to talk. So I called, and her birthday was coming up soon. Her friend from the bars was throwing her a party, so I went over there.

I drove over and went in, met a lot of cool people, and everything is going great. The girl I was into seemed attracted to me, we were talking and watching some foreign movie that I found interesting. Her friend came over and sat down by us, and started asking me what I thought of triamory. Being the innocent farmboy I was, I had never heard this word before. Their response was that it was like a three-way dating relationship. My idiotic response was that I would have a hard time sharing someone I loved with another person. At that point the ladies turned frosty towards me, and instead seemed to be quite a bit more interested in each other for the rest of the night. By the end of the night I had concluded that my friend had set me up with a lesbian in a relationship as a cruel joke, especially after they showed me the bedroom they shared, with only one large bed. Driving home I resolved to kill my friend the next time I saw him.

Only a few days later did it dawn on me that they were basically asking me to be the third in their "three-way dating relationship". I try to console myself by saying things like "oh well, her breasts were just too large anyway, it wouldn't have worked out", which is usually followed by me curling into the fetal position and cursing my innocent, naive mind.

[Abelman]

37. Oh my God.

That is the single saddest story I've ever heard.

If I wasn't poor I would somehow mail you a liquor store.

[NickB79]

39. Oh, I've drank a liquor store already, trust me

Her friend, the one who asked me about what I thought of triamory at the party, is on the local university TV show on public access, and my current girlfriend still wonders why I always look so sad when I turn that program on. Thank God she doesn't know. She wouldn't be angry, she'd just laugh and rub it in. What a peach she is, same sick sense of humor as me, so its not all bad :-)