Did you ever learn something the hard way?

[JVS]

A couple weeks ago I learned that if you still have half a bottle of milk in the fridge and you are about to drive 500 miles, you are better off letting the milk spoil than drinking it as a pre-trip meal.

[Malebolgia]

1. I learned that you never piss on an electric fence.

Happened when I was in sixth grade. There was pain. Tingling.

Don't piss on electric fences.

Edit: I'd rather piss on an electric fence again than drink milk. :puke:

[WindRavenX]

2. Never eat dairy before working out

Ever.
I was green and felt like dying.

[JVS]

4. Perhaps dairy is just plain old evil

[HEyHEY]

3. "Must. Finish. Milk."

[JVS]

5. There was only a quart left!

And finishing it was not a problem

[CAcyclist]

6. Don't fry chicken and leave the grease in the pan

for two days and then fry potatoes in it. And don't fry an expired - although still good smelling egg - in the same grease right afterward. And then, above all, don't cook up a whole giant pan of popcorn and then drizzle a half cube of butter all over it. All on the same night, anyway.

[pansypoo53219]

7. i learned that

if you are mowing the lawn with an electric mower, keep your eye on the cord. ALSO, do not pick up said moved over cord. BZZZT.

[JohnnyCougar]

8. never go out with a girl that lies about her age

especially after you found out she lied about her age!:spank:

[HEyHEY]

9. My buddy...

Picked up a girl at a concert. He was driving her home and stopped in front of her house to drop her off. She slides over his lap to get out and stops and begins writing her number on his hand
A light form the house comes on
"Jenny! What the hell are you doing?" Then the person looks at my buddy, "Do you know how old she is?"

He says, " I don't know, 18, 19?"

The woman says "SHE'S 14 YEARS OLD!"

My buddy forced her outta the car and screamed off down the street

[JVS]

10. What kind of mom let her 14 year old go to a concert!

Shame on that parent!

[HEyHEY]

11. I get the feeling she thought her daughter was "at the Library"

[hunter]

12. I learn everything the hard way...

BTW, how did the drunken singing turn out?

[Baja Margie]

13. Me too.

[JVS]

14. Ummm, yeah. You see that thread was all one big lie.

It was a kind of surreal copycat thing. There was no GF, no paycheck, no curiousity. Just the beautiful principle that there are limits to what bfs and gfs are entitled to know about each other.

[hunter]

15. The Lounge is always surreal...

:hi:

[HEyHEY]

16. What? You told me you were gonna hook me up with her sister!

[JVS]

17. I meant your sister

[HEyHEY]

19. This ain't West Virginia!

[JVS]

22. Last time I checked we weren't brothers.

Which means your sis is fair game!

[GingerSnaps]

18. Not to pay attention to jealous people

We have one girl at my college that has low self esteem so the way that she builds herself up is to make fun of everyone else. Everyone knows that she has psych problems because she holds grudges against individuals that she doesn't even know. Day after day she talks about the same people and it begins to get a bit :boring: It's called take a chill pill biotch and get a life of your own instead of trying to live everyone else's life. Your not all that and stop thinking that the world revolves around you exclusively because it doesn't :grr: If everyone was in love with her she wouldn't be on the Internet 24/7 nosing into everyone else's business. :D I have learned the hard way that I don't want to be a miserable old cow like the girl at my College. :scared:

[onebigbadwulf]

20. If you're about to have sex with a prostitute....

and you see warts on her vagina... just let her do the job by mouth.

[GingerSnaps]

21. OMG Your bad!

:wow:

[Droopy]

23. Damn, I didn't see your thread before I posted mine

I guess brilliant minds think alike.

[SarahB]

24. Trust your gut instincts.

If you meet someone and they seem like a control freak ass for example (or insert whatever negative personality trait), don't later assume that they're a nice person overall. Trust your first impression. It'll save you a lot of misery.

[jukes]

25. i rarely

describe my scars...

[China_cat]

26. Never, ever

fuck anybody crazier than yourself.

[jukes]

28. good advice!!

& since i'm the sanest m/f i've ever met...

[Thtwudbeme]

27. Do not EVER trust Republicans over the age of 22

I have never met one who would not act like a friend, then stab you in the back when you were no longer neccessary for whatever it is they are doing.

In business and personal life, trusting a Republican is stupid. I don't care if the Republican is your mother-

Stephanie

[NewJeffCT]

29. don't marry a woman if

Don't marry a woman because she's wild in bed & has a Hooters-girl body (even if she's a Democrat), as it tends to distract you from the things that are really important - like sanity, work ethic & ability to spend less than your combined take home pay.

[tavalon]

30. Did I ever learn anything important any other way? n/t

[UncleSepp]

31. When a non technical superior gives you technical sounding directions

Do not assume that everything means what you would think it means.

Once, someone told me that a SQL Server for sales databases was a mirror of production, and that all ad hoc reports should be directed to it. I assumed that 'mirror' meant 'the same data' as in replication or log shipping, not 'the data from the day before' as in a restored backup from yesterday, and redirected 8,000 user reports in Access to point to it by programatically changing the connection strings. Nobody found out until the end of the quarter reports came up and suddenly everyone's numbers were off... very off...

I re-ran the super secret script to switch back, sent out a mail that there was some kind of "glitch" and people should just run their reports again. :evilgrin:

[NoPasaran]

32. You know that orange thing in the oven?

It's HOT!