Gropin' in the Grotto - hurricane edition

[short bus president]

OK, so the lights stayed on at my house, but the Grotto was not so lucky. I understand we're working on getting generator power up, and we should have some juice flowing here real soon. Unless that's just Velma firing up her 4-stroke playfriend out back...

No cover tonight - y'all play careful, give each other a helping hand where possible, and let's see if we can't out-howl Isabel. What? No visible moon? OK - who's gonna drop their drawers?!? TrogL? This seems like a job for you... AaaaWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

[XanaDUer]

1. Break out some candles, too

We'll imbibe by candlelight...

[short bus president]

3. Er...

we maybe oughta stick with the oil lamps. Hot wax is a dangerous thing to have around when Velma gets excited...

So... can I getcha a drink? I'm just having plain old beer, myself, but the staff will be glad to mix you up anything that doesn't require a blender or the icee machine.

[XanaDUer]

5. Martini. Shaken, not stirred.

avec olive, please.

[short bus president]

7. I'm afraid

I dunno the French, but as far as the olives go, there appears to only be one left in the jar - bets on which of the cabana boys can get it out without using his hands?

[GOPisEvil]

2. Are the Grotto Girls on duty?

Or, did you give them the day off?

[short bus president]

4. day off?

EVERY DAY in the Grotto is a day off!

We're fully staffed, if not fully electrified. What'll ya have? You know the drill - snap and ye shall receive!

[GOPisEvil]

6. *snap, snap* Pilsner Urquell please!

The Fightin' Texas Aggies are down 14-12 at the half. Of course they are playing well only because I am not watching. (That's my story and I am sticking to it.)

[short bus president]

8. Urquell?

Dear Gawd man, grow some taste in beer! That horrific and foul yak piss is why the Czechs spell things so funny! But your wish is our command in the Grotto... you sure you don't want a Spaten Oktoberfest, instead?

[GOPisEvil]

9. Hrm...fuck it. Bring me Shiner Bock!

The Aggies are on the road in Virginnie, getting hurricaned on, so I'm sticking to TECKSUSS beer! :beer:

[short bus president]

10. YES! Now yer talkin' GOOD BEER!

My friend Doodoo used to always bring cases of Shiner Bock back with him whenever he went home to (ptooey!) Dallas. I could do without water if I just had a neverending supply of that sweet, sweet nectar.

[GOPisEvil]

12. You need to come to TX for Bocktoberfest!

http://www.shinertx.com/bockfest.htm

[short bus president]

14. D'oh!

I want a T-shirt! From that, and from Dildo Days. You listening, NSMA?!?

[GOPisEvil]

17. If I go, I'll get one. But, they have one every year.

:-)

[Best_man23]

11. *snap, snap*

My good DUer, bourbon neat. Remember, top shelf, not that Rebel Yell (the stuff that Dumbya drinks).

[short bus president]

13. that's all you

Maker's Mark work for ya'?

[leftist_rebel1569]

15. I'M HERE!

and it's dark, and it was rainy outside, so I got wet...really wet. Which reminds me, someone owes me a sponge bath....

but, I had an AP History quiz today, and a few other things made my day kinda tense...can you give me something that'll take the edge off, yet still be legal?

[short bus president]

16. AP History! YAY!

I ROCKED AP History. Er, US History, right?

Yeah - I'm not sure where yer lovely young friend is this evening - saw her 'round these parts earlier today, but I was out staring the deadly hurricane in the face. "The sea was angry that day, my friend."

It's a pretty low-key evening here. No beatings, no obscenity (yet). Don't tell anyone, alright, but here's a cold Spaten Oktoberfest for ya. Drink it slow, and don't get giggly and stupid, or it's ball pit for you. And all the balls floated off with the rain. So now it's just sort of a nasty filthy pool. But you get the picture.

Lemme know if we can do anything else for ya, and I promise nobody will stare and point when yer date shows up and you two get back to whatever it was you were getting into the other night. You just treat that girl right, or I'll gut ya like a fish. ;-)

[leftist_rebel1569]

18. yeah...US History

I think i'm doing ok...i'm the slacker-smart kid type that passes classes with B's and the occasional A's and C's because of homework and crap.

And, I got on again like, an hour ago, and I haven't seen her...oh well, it doesn't matter that much, she'll be here sometime....maybe...

p.s. thanks for the beer, and...ewww, I think i'll drink it slow and stay here, cuz that's not cool what happened to the Leftist_Rebel Ball Pit (and yeah, I named it after myself)....

[short bus president]

19. yep - you really do

sound like me about 15 years ago. With the "no homework" policy and all. And naming rights on the ball pit, even? I suppose you DID dig part of it yerself...

[VelmaD]

20. I have arrived...

Just got in from the gym and I'm dying. Somebody holler for Sven to come rub my back and legs. Think I pulled a hamstring.

Took an aerobics class and to quote Queen Nympho, "my tits are falling off". *sigh*

I need a beer. I don't even care what kind.

DV

[short bus president]

23. Warmed over Heinie for the lady!

and a beer, too, while we're at it.

;-)

[VelmaD]

24. No warmed over...

backside til someone works the kinks out a little bit.

What with the parents visiting and choir and Will Pitt's visit I didn't make it to the gym for about a week. I think I'm dying.

*curls up in a little ball next to you and puts head on your shoulder*

Be good to me tonight, ok? ok.

[short bus president]

26. but of course!

when am I not good to my favorite Deevee-ant?

How 'bout you sip on a nice tropical beverage in a hollowed out pineapple, and let Gustav massage yer aches while I whisper sweet nothings in yer ear and play with yer hair, umkay?

[VelmaD]

28. Sounds heavenly honey

I'm looking forward to the short bus version of "sweet nothings" with bated breath. ;-) This should be interesting.

And is that the girly kind of playing with my hair where you braid ribbons in it and put little clips and beads and stuff in it? Or are we talking manly kind of playing with my hair where you run you fingers through it and maybe pull a little bit when I get to feeling better? ;-)

[HawkerHurricane]

21. I get my own edition of the Grotto?

I'm honored and all, but what will I tell the Mrs.?

"Sir, I offer you my honor"
"Madam, I honor your offer!"
And that's how it goes all night, honor/offer, offer/honor...

[VelmaD]

22. Tell the Mrs.

to hop on in the hot tub with us. There's plenty of room. And there's no rule that says you can't fondle your spouse as opposed to the cabana girls or Grotto manager. ;-)

Welcome aboard sailor.

Darth Velma
Your Grotto Manager

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

25. Hello

ahh the lovely grotto... and how are you this evening, short bus?

[short bus president]

27. YAY! Maggie's here!

How's yer day been, sweetie? Any storm-related excitement where you live? Any school or soccer-related excitement? There's a young man sipping a now-warm beer over there in the corner would LOVE to share a little excitement with ya. He's developed IMPECCABLE taste in women here lately. ;-)

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

29. well...

I'd hate to ruin his reputation of picking the impeccable women so maybe I shouldn't go over there! ;-)

My day was fine, I'm just so busy it's hard to find time here anymore. The other day I got my coach mad at me and he's been cutting my playing time (he didn't even play me in our game yesterday- he put two weak players out on the field at once for the sole purpose of making me sad!) I'm so stressed out... sooo much to do. :(

[leftist_rebel1569]

30. damn right, IMPECCABLE!

Hi Maggie! How's it going? Or can we just go straight to the Spongebathing? :evilgrin:

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

31. hey

"Spongebathing"... is that what they're calling it these days? Hmmm. ;-)

[leftist_rebel1569]

32. lol...okay, so I made that word up

but you know what it means! :P

Well, now that I think about it, I could just give you another massage...and I think later we need to do some "studying"...;-)

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

34. ahh

that would nice... make it a good and long massage, will you please? ;-)

i'm going to bed in a little while, but we can certainly meet up tomorrow night, same place.

[leftist_rebel1569]

35. yeah...

one good and LONG massage, comin up! ;-)

and i'll be eagerly awaiting my next chance to gro-I mean, massage you...yup :D

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

37. oh that feels good... i am now sorry i have to go...

really sorry our time got cut short again. "talk" to you tomorrow? ;-)

[leftist_rebel1569]

38. aww...

oh well, at least I get to see you again soon. Good Night! :hi:

and yeah, we'll have a LONG "talk" tomorrow ;-)

[Lady Freedom]

33. Give me something strong and bitter!

If ya got something like that! :shrug: :evilfrown:

[VelmaD]

36. You know what to do...

snap for a cabana boy honey.

[Lady Freedom]

39. Snap, Snap!

leave the bottle and keep this corner dark!

[short bus president]

40. sounds like a whiskey sour night?

or maybe some LI Iced Tea for you? No worries on dark - the whole joint is in a blackout tonight.

Can any of the cabana boys get you anything?

[Lady Freedom]

41. Liquid Cocain

And keep it coming!Snap, snap! and better make it a gal, I might yell at a guy for being a guy tonight! :(

[short bus president]

42. you got it, lusty lady!

one (or two? or three?) cabana girls, at yer service. Treat 'em nice!

[Lady Freedom]

43. I will as long as...

they keep the drinks coming and leave quickly. It is more like a strait tequlia night!

[TrogL]

44. Brandy! Now!!

*sneezes*

[VelmaD]

45. Poor Trog...

are you still sniffly. I guess you need another dose of the whiskey cure. Come here baby.

DV

[short bus president]

46. er.. want that warm?

with a side of tylenol and a medically-trained cabana person?

[Aristus]

47. Coffee, doughnuts, and rum-toddies now being served in the Grotto!

Rum-toddies for all you hurricane survivors out there. Man, nothing like lousy weather to dampen libidos in the Grotto.

*sets out coffee, doughnuts, and rum-toddies*

:donut: :beer: :donut: :beer:

*starts mopping up, and floor-Sqee-geeing the deck*

*turns hot tub up to MAX*

Come 'n' git it!

[short bus president]

48. oy - my yard is a mess

even more so than usual.

Gimme something big and alcoholic. No, not TrogL...

[Aristus]

49. Here you go, sbp.

:beer: :beer:

Kind of a dismal night last night, huh? I saw a size-six flip-flop on the deck, so I assume LPFF was here, but nothing happened, right?

[short bus president]

52. yeah, Maggie showed up for a bit

I think she was here long enough to give Leftist_Rebel a fevered dream or two, then *poof* she disappeared. Left a glass slipper, I see. That was very Costanza of her. ;-)

Thanks for the hair of the hurricane-blown dog this AM, my friend.

[VelmaD]

54. Those 2 kids...

are so cute together. I'm so proud of that boy. And to think...I taught him everything he knows about flirting. *sniffle* That's my boy. *beams like proud parent*

[short bus president]

58. yes, well...

you teach him the fine flirtacious arts, and I'm here with the threats of physical ass-kicking if he even so much as thinks of mistreating Maggie. It works out well, huh? ;-)

[VelmaD]

59. That ass-kicking thing...

works both ways. I know what teenage girls are like...I was one once. If she breaks his heart I'm gonna tie her tits in a knot.

God, we are so cute though. Trying to foster true luv for the little ones. :-)

[Aristus]

55. Always a pleasure, buddy.

Just take it nice 'n' easy.

[VelmaD]

56. Or hard 'n' nasty...

though you might have to wait a bit for me to wake up for that. ;-)

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

71. HEY ARISTUS

I'm a size 9! Big feet. :D

[Aristus]

73. Sorry, LPFF. It's safer to underestimate things like that.

Hope you weren't offended! :-)

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

74. Of course not

That would probably be the right size for somebody as short as I am but I am just not normal, I decided...

[Aristus]

77. Ah, so you look like a capital 'L' do you?

Oh well. You're young. You've got a few years left to grow into your feet.

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

79. LOL

Ok they're not that big. I hate being short. :(

But really, mine aren't too bad- One of my friends wears a size 13.

[Aristus]

81. Yow!

those aren't feet, they're flippers!

LPFF, scroll down a bit and chat with the rest of us. School's out for the weekend, I trust?

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

82. yep

I have to leave soon anyway, but i'll be back in the grotto tonight. :)

[TrogL]

63. Ah, why not?

*sulks*

[VelmaD]

50. Rum and donuts...

two great tastes that taste great together. ;-)

Somebody come snuggle up with me. We had a cold-front come through here and my feet are cold.

[Aristus]

51. If you can keep your hands to yourself, Velma, I'll join you for

a warm-up. On second, thought, better not. You might catch the gastrointestinal upset that's keeping me out of school today. :(

Gecccch! I do NOT feel good! Y'all enjoy your rum-toddies. I'll just have some tea and sympathy. ;-)

[VelmaD]

53. I promise...

I'll keep the hands strictly above the waist. (Well, your waist anyway ;-)) I've got more boys than I know what to do with right now anyway.

If you aren't feeling well then pile on in here under the blankie. We can cuddle and be miserable together and maybe take a nap later. You put your head on my shoulder and I'll tuck my cold feet behind your knees. :-)

[Aristus]

57. Oooooo-OOOOOOO! Them feets is c-c-c-c-old, Vel!

Tea. Where's my tea?

*makes blankie-hood and stares miserably out at the world*

[VelmaD]

60. Poor sick baby.

*pats you on the head*

Tell ya what...I'll throw on my big fluffy teddy bear houseshoes and that should help with the cold feet thing. You just sit here and be miserable and let us take care of you for once. :-)

[Aristus]

61. How nice.

I love being pampered. I hope this ailment doesn't spread to the cabin boys and cabana girls; we need them at their peak of health.

[VelmaD]

62. Do you think

it's a stomach bug or was it maybe just something you ate?

I hate being sick to my stomach. Poor baby. *tucks the blankie around you*

Don't worry about the staff. They're young and they tend to bounce back from things pretty quick. You just worry about getting better.

[Aristus]

65. Well, the other night,

I had a bratwust-burger with saurkraut and hot mustard. Oktoberfest time, you know. That must have done it. Guess I shouldn'ta hadn'ta oughtn'ta.

[TrogL]

64. *AAAAACHOOOO*

*snork* *sniffle*

[Aristus]

66. Hey there,Trog. Sit down a spell.

Guess misery loves company. :pals:

[VelmaD]

67. Hop in Trog...

there's room under the blankie for everyone. Aristus is sick. I'm cold. Group Cuddle! :grouphug:

[Aristus]

68. Yeah, creep in, Trog.

I have no hangups about close quarters with a guy. Anyone who has crewed a tank in the dead of winter knows the importance of shared body warmth!

[VelmaD]

69. You won't see me complaining either...

hell it's my lifelong dream to be sammiched between two guys. ;-)

[Aristus]

70. Enjoying your sammich, Vel?

Talk to me, I'm bored. Staying home sick sucks. It was wonderful as a kid, but as an adult, it bites!

(...sucks.....bites......gotta remember not to talk like that around Velma.......)

[VelmaD]

75. You just keep right on...

talking like that honey. Just 'cause you gotta be good doesn't mean I do. :evilgrin:

Sorry you're bored. What can I do to entertain you? ;-)

[Aristus]

78. Sheesh, just talk to me, please.

I'm sooooooo boooooored!

:boring:

[VelmaD]

84. Ok, fine...

what would you like to talk about. We could play 20 questions or something. One of us asks and then we both answer and then the other gets to ask a question and so on.

I'll even go first.

What's your favorite color?

Mine is black. I wear black a lot.

[Aristus]

87. Blue.

How boring is that? More specifically Chrysler's Steel Blue, the color of my car.

[VelmaD]

89. You didn't ask...

a question back. You are obviously not getting the rules of the game. So, because you're sick and I'm being nice to you - I'll spot you another question.

What's your favorite comfort food?

I love my momma's homemade macaroni and cheese. She'd always make it if I looked pitiful enough. If I was a really good girl she'd make it with macaroni that was shaped like Texas. :-)

[Aristus]

90. Lasagne! with lots and lots of Parmesan cheese.

Yum! :9

Okay, what kind of car do you drive?

[VelmaD]

91. I drive...

a yellow 1992 Pontiac Sunbird. It sorta looks like a little yellow taxi cab. :-)

Hey, let's move this game of 20 questions over to your "ask me anything" thread so the Grotto staff can clean up for later tonight. I'll go over and ask you about your car. Ok? Ok.

[TrogL]

72. hmmmmmmmm

I'm starting to feel a bit better.

"Cabana boy! Beer here!"

[Aristus]

76. Selbstverstandlich, mein Herr!

Noch ein Bier fur Sie. :beer:

That was Holger saying "Of course, sir. Another beer for you."

*snap-snap* That will be all for now, Holger.

[TrogL]

80. I dunno about these Germanic types in the black hats

Where you do buy those things anyway?

I had a submissive Swede in mind. :evilgrin:

[Aristus]

83. Oh, you're thinking of Per.

Hired him just the other day. He is open to a lot of things, male and female. And he's at your service.

God! I feel like Svengali! Pandering to exotic tastes without indulging myself. :crazy:

[TrogL]

85. So indulge yourself.

Wanna threesome? :evilgrin: (note, can we get some nastier icons?)

[VelmaD]

86. Don't tempt him...

he's being a good boy these days.

But, if he decides to be bad you better invite me. ;-)

[Aristus]

88. Sorry Vel, Trog, I gotta be a good boy.

But don't let me stop you. :evilgrin:

[TrogL]

92. Never had a foursome

Three's bad enough to make me wish for a choreographer.

"Per! More beer then come sit on my lap"